Right of First Refusal Custody - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 05-03-2012, 09:51 AM - Thread Starter
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Hi!  I am new here. I have an 8 and 10 year old and have been divorced for almost 1 year. My ex has many issues and is even taking me back to court next week to argue some things.  My attorney (and 4 others I met with) all laughed and what he is taking me back to court for and said it was a waste of the judges time.  I have one issue that I really need help with. 


Can anyone tell me if they have any experience with Right of First Refusal?  My ex husband has the kids for 5 weeks this summer.  He works 7 am-5 pm.  He wants to put them in a few day camps during his time.  Can he do that?  He would have them there from 6:45 am-5:30 pm.  Is that fair?  He is fighting camps saying that it is not day care.  Our order states day care OR third party over 5 hours.  At our court hearing when we added it he asked if I would drive them to their programs that he put them in.  I agreed.  He did not even ask me if he could put them in camp.  I understand it is his time, but with this clause in our order he should be asking me if I want them first.  He could even say something like, I want to put them in this or that program is that okay if they do that instead of coming with you even if it is over 5 hours?  


It makes me even more mad, because he puts them in all of this stuff but when it comes time for him to pay for our 10 year olds boy scout camping trip (which is during his half of the summer) he said he could not afford it and he would only let him go if I paid for it!



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#2 of 3 Old 05-03-2012, 12:05 PM
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Are you available to watch them during that time?  I am assuming that you are.  Do the kids want to go to the camp?  Can they go just part of the day?


My understanding of first refusal is that if you are available to be with them why he works and the distance is workable that the kids stay with you.  

Mama to three crazy kids and one crazier dog.  biggrinbounce.gif

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#3 of 3 Old 05-03-2012, 01:34 PM
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For an 8 and 10 year old, summer camp IS child care per IRS regulations.  You can claim the money spent on summer camp as dependent care expenses.

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