How do you comment , when people say " how do you cope with so many kids ?" - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 5 Old 09-07-2012, 01:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I have been a single mom ( again ) for a few weeks and I don´t have any problems coping !

But... I do have a problem with people saying things like " how do you cope with so many kids ?" or " don´t you wish , you had less , now that you are on your own ?" huh.gif

Honestly , how do you respond to censored.gif like that ?


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#2 of 5 Old 09-08-2012, 10:29 AM
 
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Huge hugs! I'm not a single mama but I saw your posts in the unanswered and wanted to send some virtual hugs!

 

I have had similar comments to some of my oldest DD's health issues and the "How do you do it/cope?" question is always the weirdest. My answer is always "You just do, you have no other choice and it becomes your normal :)" Goodness I've had Doctor's ask me this question and I always think it's the strangest thing as her issues are very small and limited compared to what many parents deal with.

 

If someone asked the later I would probably say something along the lines of "No, never, but which one of my amazing kids would you suggest shouldn't be here?" Or just give them a really dirty look and say "Really?!"

 

I often think people are sometimes rude without even thinking about it. Or they think they are being helpful and it comes across inappropriately.

 

Glad you are doing well. I'm sorry for your sudden life change again, it's hard even if it was mutual or your choice :)


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#3 of 5 Old 09-08-2012, 11:00 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by delightedbutterfly View Post

 

If someone asked the later I would probably say something along the lines of "No, never, but which one of my amazing kids would you suggest shouldn't be here?" Or just give them a really dirty look and say "Really?!"

 

That´s a good one , especially since I really am happy with having as many kids as I have ! 

They were all planned and this is so rude , kind of like those jokes about " don´t you know , how to use a condom ?" and that sort of stuff !

When my husband died ( the Father of my 4 older kids ) " at least " people were somewhat compassionate about me being on my own , since there really was nothing , I could do about it , but now , after kicking out the emotionally abusive Father of my 2 youngest , it´s almost like " poor man , he probably couldn´t take it anymore "

Well , actually , no , I could not take him anymore !


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#4 of 5 Old 09-18-2012, 10:26 AM
 
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Originally Posted by tonttu View Post

 but now , after kicking out the emotionally abusive Father of my 2 youngest , it´s almost like " poor man , he probably couldn´t take it anymore "

Yuck! People can be pretty thoughtless. 

 

I just wanted to say too that I read your signature line and am so impressed about your VBACs after 3 C-sections. Wow! That's wonderful. 

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#5 of 5 Old 09-19-2012, 03:55 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Mama Soltera View Post

 

I just wanted to say too that I read your signature line and am so impressed about your VBACs after 3 C-sections. Wow! That's wonderful. 

 



Thanks , I am SO proud of that !


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