Girlspn - I have worked to build a support group in Arixona. I have lived there almost 4 years now. It is a little slower making friends there as people are more closed off. I'm very picky about who I will invite into my life as well.
I figured after a kid comes along is too late (I'll be working, so between work and kid, there just wouldn't be much time), that's why i joined the single mama group nearby. I have made a close friend through that group, and am paying it forward by sharing social time with her and been able to help out with baby in a couple of short notice emergencies. I also have a friend of almost 10 years who is more of a grandma age, which would also be nice for a kiddo to experience. I live right across the street from two great elementary schools with pre-k at age 3, so it would work out well.
In Hawaii however, I'd have 10x's the number of people to help out, and even strangers are so much more family friendly and accommodating. Its just the difference in culture.
Speaking of which, it is a very Asian culture here, but with a mix of American customs and acceptance of people from all sorts of backgrounds and family situations. It almost sounds like it would be a good fit for you! Easier travel to Asia from here for family visits.
I did look at a place to potentially move to. I am not sure how the finances would work out, but I will find out more about that once I get home. I'm hesitant to make a move before I have my kid tho, it just adds in more potential delays. But i would like to line things up, so that with or without a kiddo (who knows if i can stay pregnant), I'd have the option to return here.
I am also an introvert. I am a friendly person and can be very warm and close once I know someone, but I initially keep a comfortable distance. I think starting a group might be different though, because you'll be meeting people in a very similar situation, there's a certain vulnerability to being a single mama that will make you feel like you already know the person in some form. I would try it out. Worse case, it doesn't work, but there's no harm done. Best case, you'll make great new friends.