We have made the decision to split and plan to start a nesting arrangement soon while we hammer out all the divorce details. It makes a lot of sense to keep the kids here, with each of us rotating out. Our kids are 9 (grade 4), 11 (grade 6) and 13 (grade 8). We also have 3 cats and a dog. I have been a full-time SAHM since Fall 2011 (but have taught 5-6 yoga classes per week for the past 5 years). We've lived in this neighborhood since 2004.
We have agreed on the following details:
He is here every Monday and Tuesday.
I am here every Wednesday and Thursday.
We switch out alternate Fri-Sun.
Your day ends the following morning after getting kids off to school. The other parent is responsible for after school that day. So for example Monday and Tuesday means I will arrive here after work that day, and stay until the kids are off to school on Wednesday morning. You are responsible for any appointments (haircuts, dentist) that fall on your day. You are responsible if someone is sick on your day, or needs something at school. Same for extra-curriculars and sports and bday parties.
We are relatively amicable, and it's in both of our best interests (not to mention the kids) to wait a while to list the house for sale. Ideally, the timing will work out that the kids live here for the entire school year, and we'll move next summer. This gives us time to do some painting and organizing and downsizing.
The plan is that we stay with friends on our off time to avoid additional housing costs. I have a feeling STBX will want to rent his own place at some point, and I may too, but at least for the short run we are going to try this. It is also possible (with notice) that one of us could come here on our off day late at night to sleep.
We have a large home with a finished walk-out basement that has a bedroom and bathroom. STBX has already been sleeping down there for several weeks. Once we tell the kids and start the arrangement he'll move his clothes and toiletries down there.
I am very optimistic that this will all work except for the housekeeping, cooking and grocery shopping.
Does anyone have any experience??
Maybe something like you clean on your days... must clean the kitchen, bath before leaving and every sunday must clean living areas of house. kids are responsbile for own rooms.?
what you use , you replace. ( dont leave 2 drops of milk in the fridge or 1 roll of TP for a family of 4)
Whatever you do I would put it all down in writing.
Mom to J and never-ending , 0/2014 items decluttered, 0/52 crafts crafts completed
Seeking zen in 2014. Working on journaling and finding peace this year. Spending my free time taking J to swimteam