Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: surrounded by testosterone
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Custody/child support orders that reference parental cooperation only work for exes who are equally inclined to cooperate. It is so frustrating, when courts don't understand this. My husband and his ex (whose son lives with DH and me) had so, so many issues where the court expected them to work out details themselves and it seemed so asinine, when their history was replete with examples of Mom's decisions being solely based on opposing DH, in spite of what was obviously fair or in their child's best interest. Why do you pay all the attorneys' fees and court costs, if you're going to wind up with orders that tell you to work it out yourselves? If that were possible, you would've done it, for free!
IME, your only functional option is to return to court and either request a modification, with more specific orders (spelling out which expenses you guys will share, how you will notify him of the amount due, whether he'll reimburse you - and by when - or whether he'll pay his share directly, and what consequence he'll have for failing to do it); OR you could request a coordinator (like a PTC), to help mediate expenses as they arise. It's a matter of how much money you're willing to invest up front, to save yourself headaches and expenses until your daughter's an adult. It would be nicer, though, if the heartache of people's divorces weren't such a cash cow for the divorce industry.
One woman in a house full of men: my soul mate:
... twin sons:
(HS seniors) ... step-son:
(a sophomore) ... our little man:
(a first grader) ... and there is another female in the house, after all