Hi girls! I'm new here! First time to the board and was reading this thread.
It's amazing to finally find others like me lol. Most other single moms I know either don't admit these things or I don't know....just dont' get that we like it lol.
I am also thrilled to be a single parent. My ex and I divorced 3yrs ago. I have two boys ages 5 1/2 and 7 who are handsome, intelligent, comical, sweet, affectionate, loving and thriving!
I recently (about 6-7mo ago) met a wonderful man who was also a single parent. Everything was going wonderful. He was eager for marriage and I kind of fell in the trap sort of speak for a moment, thinking being married again would be nicer (all this was just stupid love talking since b4 this I swore I'd never get remarried again, it actually made me want to vomit). However, I started having real doubts and serious thoughts and serious "sit down and think about this girl" moments. We were already looking for engagement rings and had all the wedding planned. We broke up very recently when I was honest with myself and with him about not being ready and not wanting a relationship like I thought I did. (guess the loneliness bug hit me and I was kind of rebounding from a 1 1/2yr friends w/benefits thing)
Suddenly, ALL the things that you loose in marriage seemed SO much bigger then what you gain (sex and companionship). You loose your freedom to make your own choices w/out consulting ANYONE, about ANYTHING. Where/how/what to do, who to visit, holidays, relatives, where to travel, what to have for dinner, who's doing what, who paid what bill, you can't hang out w/your male or female friends as much, no more girl night sleepovers, suddenly you have to cater to their needs and attention seeking crap when your kids need you. You can sit around in underwear w/out feeling self-concious, watch what you want, drink what and how much you want. Not shave if you don't want to, no nagging, no "checking w/my husband" b4 committing to any engagement. No not being able to have a dinner or phone conversation to catch up w/an exe's life that you no longer give a hoot about but your new spouse would not allow it.
You can put blue sweats, green socks and a purple shirt and walk around w/dirty hair becuase your kids are visiting at their dads and you want to sit around all day, reading, watching lifetime, looking crappy, having 3 /4 beers over the span of the afternoon and NOBODY tells you to quit being lazy.
Oh, that evening you get to baby up, pamper, go out for night on the town or w/grlfnds, or ahem....go do something else
or go dancing, or go check out the cute guys at the bar that you know you aren't taking home but their fun to flirt with. Shoot theirs more, but this is plenty for a first post.
I like it here, this will be my new home I think hehe.