Obtaining Passport for DS w/o his fathers consent? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 21 Old 08-20-2007, 12:28 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I was wondering if anyone had any experience with this. We will be traveling out of the country this winter and need passports. The problem is that the application calls for both parents to be present, or a notarized statement from other parent, or legal papers declaring me the custodial parent. The bigger problem is that I have none of these.

I cannot get DS's Dad's consent because that would require finding him, talking with him, and getting him to do something for us (ha,ha).

We had the when we were teens and unmarried. We never went thorough a custody hearing or child support- so I guess by default I am the custodial parent.

So, what can be done? I have to put the app. in soon so we can get the passport in time for vacation. However, I DO NOT want to have to find and contact his father nor do I have the time to open up a court case.

Anyone go through something similar?

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#2 of 21 Old 08-20-2007, 12:39 AM
 
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no advice, I'm in the EXACT same spot, except I have 2 kids w/ 2 bio-dads. With DS1, I'm the only one on the BC & I could get a signed statement from his bio-dad, if needed. I have no idea where the ex (ds2's bd) is & I'd really like to keep it that way. I hope someone has ideas.

I'm thinking of just using it as a push to take care of the paperwork. I've been putting it off for FAR too long. Eventually, I need to bite the bullet and get everything legal and in writing.
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#3 of 21 Old 08-20-2007, 12:42 AM
 
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When I took my DS to get his passport three years ago this month, I had to produce my DH's death certificate with the birth certificates and old passports.

The State Department is six months in arrears for some passports, so I suggest you get going.

Good luck.

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#4 of 21 Old 08-20-2007, 12:48 AM
 
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, applejuice, I'm sorry about your DH. I'd forgotten that.

(the mature, enlightened part of me is trying really hard not to wish I had a death certificate right now..... )
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#5 of 21 Old 08-20-2007, 02:49 AM
 
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The state department's website has a form called DS-3053 that you can print out for special circumstances like an absent parent. I think line 5 applies to absent parents. Just fill it out and get it notarized and they usually don't question it.
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#6 of 21 Old 08-20-2007, 03:03 AM
 
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Thank you!! I just downloaded the form and it looks perfect!
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#7 of 21 Old 08-20-2007, 03:53 AM
 
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Glad I could help.
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#8 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 01:39 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by crispysmom View Post
The state department's website has a form called DS-3053 that you can print out for special circumstances like an absent parent. I think line 5 applies to absent parents. Just fill it out and get it notarized and they usually don't question it.
Thanks! That for is just what I need. I knew there had to be some way around the 2 parent consent.

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#9 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 01:54 PM
 
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#10 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 05:02 PM
 
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seems like the issue is resolved, but i thought i'd add that when i got ds's passport, i idn't need a letter for the passport, but carried one with me on our international trip (to aus from usa) though i was never asked for it.

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#11 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 05:25 PM
 
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I'll put the link up as that is useful to a lot of us! Thanks for the headsup, crispysmom!
http://www.state.gov/documents/organization/80106.pdf

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#12 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 06:11 PM
 
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i'm going through the same thing right now with 2 of my children. If only the mom is on the birth certificate then you do not need the fathers consent. Just leave the area where it asks about the father blank. As far as this special circumstances form....i had it notarized and they still did not accept it. Actually i got a call today saying that i need more consent. Either a court order stating to issue the passport with out the other parents consent or a c/o stating the other parent has to consent or sole custody or the other parents consent. So the EX will not consent to a thing and now i'm in search on an attorney to help me get this c/o. And we are moving to MX in Dec. i can't believe this. I knew that eveything would go through with that special circumstances form and it didnt. Also come to find out that there day put them on the national database to be notified when the children are applying for passports. So they notified him too.

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#13 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 06:27 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Mamato3wild ponnie View Post
i'm going through the same thing right now with 2 of my children. If only the mom is on the birth certificate then you do not need the fathers consent. Just leave the area where it asks about the father blank. As far as this special circumstances form....i had it notarized and they still did not accept it. Actually i got a call today saying that i need more consent. Either a court order stating to issue the passport with out the other parents consent or a c/o stating the other parent has to consent or sole custody or the other parents consent. So the EX will not consent to a thing and now i'm in search on an attorney to help me get this c/o. And we are moving to MX in Dec. i can't believe this. I knew that eveything would go through with that special circumstances form and it didnt. Also come to find out that there day put them on the national database to be notified when the children are applying for passports. So they notified him too.
I think the whole point of the special circumstances form is for when you cannot locate the child's other parent. You basically have to swear that you don't know where he (or she) is, or if there's some other reason why you can't reach the person to obtain permission.

I hate to say it, but your ex probably has the right to refuse to let you leave the country with his kids.
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#14 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 06:35 PM
 
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So is the form, worth the fee for the notary? Have multiple people had good experiences with it? My feeling is that it depends upon the processor that handles the forms, but I could be wrong.

And, I agree that the purpose of the form is to say:
Hey, I cannot find this person! If, indeed, they can track him down, more power to them, I just cannotis the purpose of the person with the form, I believe. It is not a way to circumvent the other party.

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#15 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 06:49 PM
 
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My friends that have used the form did it because the fathers couldn't be located. That is the form's original purpose. They never had any trouble getting passports for their kids.

However, it can't be used to take the kids out of the country just because you don't want to notify the father for whatever reason. I understand not wanting to notify him. There may not be any way around that though.
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#16 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 06:56 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Bad Mama Jama View Post
So is the form, worth the fee for the notary?
You can probably have the form notarized at your bank for free. I am a notary in Illinois and here if you do charge people to notarize you can only charge $1 so in your case it is worth a shot if it will only cost $1 or less!
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#17 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 07:20 PM
 
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Well worth it in my opion, then. The fees range, but I could ask at my bank, too. That is a good idea. Thank you.

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#18 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 07:26 PM
 
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Well worth it in my opion, then. The fees range, but I could ask at my bank, too. That is a good idea. Thank you.
If you lived in Illinois I would do it for you

Also call your library, I have been told that they also offer notary services.
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#19 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 07:36 PM
 
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my bank charges $5, but I get it done for free from a co-worker. Free is worth it to me
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#20 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 09:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Mamato3wild ponnie View Post
i'm going through the same thing right now with 2 of my children. If only the mom is on the birth certificate then you do not need the fathers consent. Just leave the area where it asks about the father blank. As far as this special circumstances form....i had it notarized and they still did not accept it. Actually i got a call today saying that i need more consent. Either a court order stating to issue the passport with out the other parents consent or a c/o stating the other parent has to consent or sole custody or the other parents consent. So the EX will not consent to a thing and now i'm in search on an attorney to help me get this c/o. And we are moving to MX in Dec. i can't believe this. I knew that eveything would go through with that special circumstances form and it didnt. Also come to find out that there day put them on the national database to be notified when the children are applying for passports. So they notified him too.
I'm sorry that sounds like a pain.

What is this database that you mentioned?

DS1's father is on the birth certificate. How much searching does the gov't expect me to do? Could I find him? Probably, if I looked hard enough. I really hope this process isn't a PITA.

Mom to DS1, DS2, DD1 and DD2! h20homebirth.gif
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#21 of 21 Old 08-21-2007, 10:54 PM
 
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Parental rights to a non supporting parent...sorry but when you dont pay a dime for your kids in years...you have no rights concerning what or where your children go.......He may have rights, but damn so do i....:

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