I think I'm in trouble now... UPDATE 18, 61 **82** - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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Old 01-04-2008, 12:50 AM
 
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I just happened upon this thread... I'm so glad that everything is working out (I mean beyond the whole being hours late for visitation, thing!). Of course by showing up late & leaving early he's really just digging his own hole, right?

I know it's a bit late, but -- Merry Christmas!!
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Old 01-04-2008, 12:51 AM
 
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Document and report back to the court that he spent little time with your child and clearly not enough to get to know him or to take him on overnights. After all he put you through, hopefully a judge will see that its more about punishing you than about seeing his child.
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Old 01-04-2008, 03:02 AM
 
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Originally Posted by homewithtwinsmama View Post
Document and report back to the court that he spent little time with your child and clearly not enough to get to know him or to take him on overnights. After all he put you through, hopefully a judge will see that its more about punishing you than about seeing his child.


"It should be a rule in all prophylactic work that no harm should ever be unnecessarily inflicted on a healthy person (Sir Graham Wilson, The Hazards of Immunization, 1967)."
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Old 01-04-2008, 08:02 AM
 
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Single mama to Alex(13), Maddy(12), Sam(8), Violet(6), and Ruby(3). fly-by-nursing1.gif
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Old 01-04-2008, 09:13 AM
 
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Glad that everything went well, and that he is showing his true colors! I agree...document everything. A parent who does not show up to see their child is not going to be able to meet the child's needs, and the courts do tend to see that.
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Old 01-04-2008, 01:10 PM
 
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While it sucks for your son that your ex is so disinterested, it is actually very good news that he pulled this stuff now, before you go into a final hearing. He is digging his own hole, and I, for one, hope he falls right into it.

I could easily see him and his attorney claiming that you blocked or undermined the visit. But, wise mama that you are, you had a witness
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Old 01-04-2008, 01:42 PM - Thread Starter
 
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After each visit, I email myself concerns during the visit. That way everything is time and date stamped and they can't say "oh she just wrote that last night." Taking suggestions from another thread, I go out and purchase a soda or something from the store right before and right after each visit so that if he says, "I didn't leave that early" then I can show my receipts to prove that he wasn't here and so I was able to leave the house. I don't know if it'll be helpful in court, but it certainly can't hurt.

My original attorney has come back from bereavement and it's amazing how much more relaxed I feel. She is totally AP and has worked in this system for about 20 years, so she is very well known by this judge. I think that will make a world of difference. She's very cut-throat and so much more confident that her associate, who seemed to not care or understand that ds didn't have attachment to his father. I feel like I can actually breathe again now that I have good representation. This is the first time in weeks that I'm not nauseated from the stress, and I think it's because I know I'm in good hands again.

Thank you everyone! The support here is amazing.
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Old 01-04-2008, 01:58 PM
 
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Glad to hear your original atty is back. It sounds like she was worth waiting for.
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Old 01-04-2008, 02:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by WatermelonSnow View Post
Glad to hear your original atty is back. It sounds like she was worth waiting for.
It's funny... two months ago I was considering changing attorneys because mine seemed almost too laid-back. Now that I have interviewed other attorneys and seen what court is really like, I realize that my attorney is not too laid-back, she is just very confident, and I think that the judge sees that too. It helps that several other attorneys I interviewed had nothing but great things to say about mine.

After all this stress, I really could use a night out, though! Even just to a movie or something... although a martini doesn't sound bad, either.
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Old 01-05-2008, 05:52 AM
 
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I couldn't read this and not respond. I'm not a single mother, but I probably will be soon.

I think you're handling this with grace and that is what will matter in the long run. He will get bored with this. Is his girlfriend the one pushing the visitation issue? I can't tell you how many times I've seen that over the years, just with my single mother friends.

I'm glad things are going your way right now, sorry that he's dipping out on his responsibilities and making life difficult. Keep your chin up.

Much love to you.
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