Being an advocate is being a controling b***h - Mothering Forums

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Old 03-17-2002, 02:42 PM - Thread Starter
 
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AHHHHHH! My ex is an idiot! His ex girlfriend beat the crap out of him Feb 13, they both went to jail and charged with 3rd degree assalt and had a restraining order placed against this woman and I just found out...SHE IS LIVING WITH HIM AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Does he not think? I do not want my dd around this woman, she is a phyco! I'm sorry she is, she tried to scratch his eyes out for god sakes!

So...When I asked him about it and told him my concerns for dd safety he tells me I am a controling b***h and it is not my bussiness. To hell its not! DD is not to be put in danger just because he wants to mess his own life up...Why are some men so clueless? Poor dd...I really don't want to get nasty here but talking to him isn't working....:mad: :mad: :mad:

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Old 03-17-2002, 04:33 PM
 
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Hi BathrobeGoddess
I think you are absolutely right. Do not let your dd go to the house where this woman is. Her dad can see her at your house, if you can stand it, or he can meet you and dd at a public place, like a mall or park, and visit with her there. Then you can drive her home, and you will know he is not going to take her to his house. I agree with you that it is a bad situation for your daughter, and you are only protecting your child.
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Old 03-18-2002, 02:29 AM
 
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This really sucks. I wonder what is going on in his head. I mean, my ex has done stupid crap before, but this really is sad. I mean, why would he let himself get treated like this?? Does he have really low self esteem? Why would he want your child to witness behavior like this?? Sad stuff, I am so sorry.

I absolutely agree that I would not let your babe near this woman, you have every right to be cautious....meeting in a public place sounds like a good idea. I hope he gets rid of this chick. I'm sure our kids have enough to deal with without having to be involved in anything so negative. I'm sorry you have to deal with this. Go with your gut and keep your kid safe.

Love,
Christi
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Old 03-18-2002, 01:27 PM
 
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And b***h is something men toss at women to shut us up.
You have every right to be concerned for your child, that is your job.
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Old 03-18-2002, 04:55 PM
 
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OMG! If it weren't for your location, I would think you were my friend. My friend's kids called 911 when her ex's girlfriend was beating up her ex. The girlfriend went after the kid and ended up in jail. DO NOT LET YOUR KID GO THERE! I think all the time about the damage that did to my friend's kids. Thank goodness they were old enough to call 911.

No judge in the world would make you send your dd there. Tell your ex that it is his obligation to provide a physically and emotionally safe home for your dd and when he does this he can have visitation. Until then, maybe you could offer supervised visits at your house?
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Old 03-18-2002, 05:07 PM
 
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{{{huge hugs}}}

I just cannot believe this! You must be so outraged and frustrated! You *actually* have to deal with an ex like this! You are absolutely right, you must keep your DD out of that woman's presence at all costs! You are BY NO MEANS a b***h (as your ex believes) for protecting your child! Trust in your parenting skills and gut feelings, this will somehow work out

Take care and more hugs!
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Old 03-19-2002, 12:43 AM
 
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You might want to talk to a lawyer about placing a restraining order against your ex's gf, prohibiting her from being near your children. That way, he legally has to refrain from taking your daughter to the same place she is, and they can be arrested for violating it.

Also, that way you don't have to deny him whatever visitation rights have already been laid out (assuming he is supposed to be entitled to unsupervised visitation).

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Old 03-19-2002, 12:55 AM
 
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you cannot let your DD be around this craziness. There has to be something you can do. Can you speak to a lawyer? Most will speak to you for nothing. Maybe get an order for this nutcase to stay away for your child. This would be a horrible situation for a kid to be in. I hope you find some way to keep her out of it.
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