we're not good enough to play with... - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 65 Old 03-11-2008, 02:10 PM
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I really think you are inspiring. It's people like you that help bring about positive change in this world. You could have just blew them off like they did to you, but you gave them another chance. That was not the easy road to take. You are one good momma:
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#62 of 65 Old 03-13-2008, 12:47 AM
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Don't take it personally. A lot of people are very classist and consider that perfectly legitimate, whereas they would be embarassed to act in a racist manner. I live in a cute house in a traditionally lower income-black-hispanic neighborhood and have had contractors refuse to work for me and friends tell me not to buy the house, not raise my dd here. One friend finally came to visit and said, "people drive so crazy on this part of town." Ridiculous.

The way I see it is don't bother trying to win over snobs. It doesn't work because even when they make concessions, underneath they feel superior and uncomfortable.

It's too bad that Montesorri schools tend to be expensive so only the wealthier tend to attend them. I say cultivate relationships with non-snobby mothers and don't bother trying to pursue or educate the rest. You also don't need to feel apologetic for where you live. There's nothing shameful about being working class or single. You are making a life for yourself and your dd and that is something you can be proud of.
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#63 of 65 Old 03-13-2008, 12:56 AM
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Just a lurker posting to say that I am so impressed with how you handled it! I aspire to be like that. I would have gotten pissy, maybe written a nasty e-mail and avoided everyone from that point on. Not the best course of action. I'm glad it worked out for you guys.

Shawna, married to Michael, mommy to Elijah 1/18/01, Olivia 11/9/02, and Eliana 1/22/06
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#64 of 65 Old 03-15-2008, 05:16 AM
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I'm so impressed about how you handled it! I live in subsidized housing and ran into that attitude a couple times and one family just flat out said they would NEVER come to my house. I've given up actually inviting - but our kids are different schools anyway. I just think you handled it really well.

single mama to 5 (12.5, 11, 10, and 8 year old twins)

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#65 of 65 Old 03-15-2008, 11:25 AM
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I didn't read through all the responses yet, but wanted to say that I'd rather live in your cozy, loving mobile home with you, than in a mansion with that horrible snobby woman. I feel very sorry for her child, living with a mother like that.

I am sorry, though, that your child's feelings were hurt. Please keep trying, not everyone is like that.

I have a small apartment, not fancy, and ALL the other moms I know in this town have large homes, landscaped yards, the whole deal, but I have been so blessed to find a group that isn't judgemental about my considerably much lower financial situation. They're out there, good people. You'll find the right ones, and your little one will feel a part of things, don't worry!
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