Okay I am beginning to realise that dh/stbx whatever he is...
might work out better if we have our own spaces..I like controlling my own life/time... and I am not really interested in anyone else or any other relationship...and he only cheats on me with his job...he's a workaholic...no family/work balance
We've been separated now...14 months WOW...we managed to get pregnant during the honeymoon phase of seeing if we should get back together...contrary to other people's wishes I don't feel I need him back because of that...we get along pretty okay when he can just come in and be here....and when he has to work works...as long as his workaholic heart desires
But i was thinking since the realestate market is becomming more of a bargain..... and we are paying obscene rent on 2 places.....could he/we/me buy a house with a basement apartment and he lives in that...and the kids and I in the upstairs but still remain legally separated?
I know some people would say whats the point but.....
8 might be enough?
Or maybe 9 will be?
EDD September 18, 2015
It really does depend on your state--here in WI, you don't have to physically separate to divorce. And I would assume in some states that a separate address would be sufficient, even if those addresses happen to be in the same building (i.e. 101A and 101B E. Main Street). But this is really a question for your lawyer.
ProtoLawyer (the now-actual lawyer, this isn't legal advice, please don't take legal advice from some anonymous yahoo on the Internet) Spouse (the political geek) * Stepdaughter (the artist) * and introducing...the Baby (um, he's a baby? He likes shiny things).
I know a few families that do this. Most of them work opposite shifts, and live in the same house, just as roommates. They do it for the kids, and if they have any personal relationships, it is never brought into the house. Not just our of respect for the ex, but for the kids sake as well.
It might be useful for you to read through what some of us had to say. I know that people can do it, but it is rough!! You really need to assess your own personal situation and think about how you would handle x's dating or other lifestyles and how much the DC would be exposed. How would it affect you? Do you want him to be so close to you and be able to know when you are home, out, etc.? I think for the DC it would be wonderful if you can get along and they can be so close to both of you. In my situation, we get along on the surface but I need to bite my tongue so often and just deal with stuff that I wish I didn't have to see, process, deal with. I am very much looking forward to him moving out in about 3 weeks!! Just think that buying a house is a long term commitment. Even if you can get an excellent deal and he would have his own entrance, etc. it still may be too close for comfort. You need to be the judge!