Anyone living solely on state or fed assistance? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 10 Old 07-07-2008, 01:40 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Well, never thought it would come to this .. but I've got 2 toddlers and am pregnant ... not due till Feb but I am dragging already, it feels just as it did with my twins. Sooo tired and hungry and any amount of stress causes cramping and light spotting.

The dad of this pregnancy is in Australia... he had already proposed and we were planning to get married this summer -- but the pregnancy scared him off. We're all probably better off... though it doesn't seem like it right now.

Anyway... we have till the 31st to find a new place to live -- I have *no* idea where we are going. My parents are trying to help me locate a place. I applied for cash assistance over 2 weeks ago and heard nothing back so far.

I just keep telling myself that everything is going to be all right ... I mean, I really believe that... blessings!
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#2 of 10 Old 07-07-2008, 01:45 AM
 
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Oh my, I just wanted to send you hugs. I know it is a difficult place to be in.

~Carla~ LOVING~ LIFE~
Homebirthing, somewhat crunchy, single mom of ~5~.
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#3 of 10 Old 07-07-2008, 09:23 AM
 
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more hugs
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#4 of 10 Old 07-07-2008, 10:00 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks, I appreciate it. You know, with my twins I was with somebody and was treated like crap ... they wound up coming premature, horrible c-section birth, weeks and weeks of terrible NICU while recovering from deep wounds to my body etc.

This time around even though I have no idea how I am going to do this, I am feeling peaceful. I don't have any negative 'entities' living with me to cause harm to the kids or I. Although we're just about broke, I have gotten rid of most of my ex's debt while working hard this past year ...

I was fired from my job a little over a month ago for missing work due to sick feverish kids ... I had no choice but to stay home with them, and the doctor's notes were not enough to keep my job. Normally I would be a basket case ... but again I feel peaceful.

I have to move, but I'm not being evicted. I've simply evaluated my money situation and how much rent costs here. I have enough to pay all the July bills, then there will hardly be anything left. Sooo... I'm tying up the loose ends, cancelling my services. I'm going to apply for lifeline so I can keep my cell for emergencies... but everything is getting cut off this month.

I've got no money for a deposit on a new place nor any income, until I hopefully get on cash assistance -- but I am sure my dad will cover the deposit for me, and co-sign ... I hate that... I've always been Ms Independence ... but you do what you have to do for your kids...

Anyway ... thank you for the hugs, I appreciate it.
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#5 of 10 Old 07-07-2008, 10:50 PM
 
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It sounds like you're really being as responsible and resourceful as possible given your situation. I always take being at peace as a good sign that I'm doing the right thing, and the best I can.

I pray that things will fall into place for you.
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#6 of 10 Old 07-08-2008, 02:51 AM
 
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: i am sending you good vibes and i also think you are prioritizing well and you seem to know what is best for your family. best wishes to you and i think it is scary to step out there, but it is what has to be done for you all.

Former dreads.gifwearing, treehugger.gifing, pole dancing, read.gifpushing, ribbonpurple.gifsurvivor & single mama extraordinaire to energy.gif.  

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#7 of 10 Old 07-08-2008, 12:27 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks again for the kinds words... life is so ironic... at what seems like the lowest point of my life(financially anyway), I am actually the most stable and content inside. :
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#8 of 10 Old 07-08-2008, 01:01 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by twins10705 View Post
Thanks again for the kinds words... life is so ironic... at what seems like the lowest point of my life(financially anyway), I am actually the most stable and content inside. :
You have a beautiful outlook!

Good luck mama!

"There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way and not starting." - Buddha.
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#9 of 10 Old 07-09-2008, 06:26 PM
 
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I just wanted to send you hugs and let you know that I am with you. I have two daughters ages six and eight from my marriage (I am now divorced). For two years I was not receiving child support and I worked my butt off to pay for everything we needed, 50 hours each week and tried to take college classes on top of it. Somehow, I made all A's, my daughters are happy, and we have money, but to be honest - I don't remember very much of it. ]

Then, in March I found out that I was pregnant. I was in a new but good and stable relationship, but the pregnancy must have scared him and he changed drastically. So, I told him to take off. I've continued my work and school schedule, but it is killing me. One of my jobs is in a cafe, on my feet for 10.5 hours, which I've since reduced to eight. I recently decided that I've proved that I can kill myself to take care of us, but the longer I show the world that, the longer it takes me to actually become self sufficient. So, when this little man comes, I'm not going back to work. Instead, I'm going to double my classes - most of which I can do from home. This way, I can reach my goals without sacrificing the best interests of my children.

That is my plan, to use government assistance to give me a step up instead of holding my hand forever as many use it. I feel that is what the system is for. My degree is in social work, so I feel like I can pay them back by working for them afterwards. lol
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#10 of 10 Old 07-10-2008, 03:20 PM
 
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We've been living like this for over a year now.First it was just food stamps,then cash and food stamps,and now cash and food stamps for dd and I and SSI for ds.We're also finally getting cs(I get half of what exh pays every week for ds,and $50 a month for dd,the rest goes to the state).I have a lot of mental and medical issues right now,and am working on getting better.It's very hard,as I can't even pay my bills most of the time,never mind the credit card bills I ran up buying food and other necessities.My phone's been shut off.Thankfully I live in my dad's apartment house,and share his internet connection,phone line,and satellite tv.I have it pretty good right now.My food stamps were cut again,so I use food banks(there is one every week,and one that can be used once a month) and use the community centers often.

I would look into community resources in your area.The main one here will pay security deposits(the landlord gives it back to them if you move),and help with rent once a year.I haven't used those services,but my friends have.They also help with electric and gas bills(even if only to call for you,since the utilities will listen to them and set up arrangements you can afford).They can also help with food,here it is commodities every month(sometimes juice,cereal,soups,canned veggies,rice,that kind of stuff),and a food voucher for a church every 3 months.They also have a clothing bank,which can be used every 6 months,and a statewide furniture bank where you can purchase very cheap furniture.There's also WIC for pregnant and nursing mamas and kids under 5.Right now my kids are in a federally funded camp through a community resource agency,12-4pm 5 days a week,lunch included,field trips,lots of special programs,and it only cost $55 for 4 weeks,both kids.$15 to join the agency as a family,and $20 per child.There is so much out there,it's amazing.I also use second hand shops,great bargains and also a great way to recycle.I try to give back by donating my kids outgrown clothes and toys,as well as other things we no longer need.

Good luck,and I hope everything works out for you!

Student mama to one awesome,talented and unique dd,15 and one amazing, sweet and strong ds,12(born with heart defect Tetralogy of Fallot,also on the autism spectrum),9 cats,and 2 gerbils.
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