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#1 of 122 Old 11-02-2008, 08:33 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi Everyone !!!!
:


FINALLY, I met someone (in case you were following in the other thread)

He is taking me to Amsterdam this month :

We are talking about ttc !!!! :

I always knew it could/would happen, but alas, the time is upon us


I will write more with more in the way of details, but for now I need to go jump in the shower before the DC are up




                                Whatever will be, already is...
 
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#2 of 122 Old 11-02-2008, 10:46 AM
 
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I'm just so totally and completely happy for you, Beloved!!! Enjoy every moment!
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#3 of 122 Old 11-02-2008, 11:16 AM
 
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I am also thrilled for you, Beloved, my friend! I love, Love, LOVE "hearing" the joy in your posts!

As for me - I *may* just be dipping my baby toe back into the dating pool. My sweetheart and I broke up back in September (after being together for a year and a few months). He is the only man I dated since my marriage broke up back in 2003.

BUT there is this guy. You know how sometimes there is a person that you see off and on, and always feel a connection with? Always flirt with when you see him but nothing more ever comes of it? Well, I saw him every week back in February, March and April, saw him once in May, then ran into him in August. Well, the other day I talked to a woman who knows him, his name came up, and she mentioned that he wanted to ask me for my number but chickened out. I let her know that I would be more than happy to give it to him. I will see him Tuesday. Unless one of us experiences sickness/death/natural disaster, I am sure I will see him on Election Day. Sooooo - I'm going to see what he does, and if he doesn't ask me out I am seriously considering saying something like "You know, the next time you are sure to see me is in February. Do you really want to wait until then to ask me out?!"
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#4 of 122 Old 11-02-2008, 11:50 AM
 
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Originally Posted by mmace View Post
I am sure I will see him on Election Day. Sooooo - I'm going to see what he does, and if he doesn't ask me out I am seriously considering saying something like "You know, the next time you are sure to see me is in February. Do you really want to wait until then to ask me out?!"
You should totally say that!

treehugger.gif
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#5 of 122 Old 11-02-2008, 09:00 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mmace View Post
I am also thrilled for you, Beloved, my friend! I love, Love, LOVE "hearing" the joy in your posts!

As for me - I *may* just be dipping my baby toe back into the dating pool. My sweetheart and I broke up back in September (after being together for a year and a few months). He is the only man I dated since my marriage broke up back in 2003.

BUT there is this guy. You know how sometimes there is a person that you see off and on, and always feel a connection with? Always flirt with when you see him but nothing more ever comes of it? Well, I saw him every week back in February, March and April, saw him once in May, then ran into him in August. Well, the other day I talked to a woman who knows him, his name came up, and she mentioned that he wanted to ask me for my number but chickened out. I let her know that I would be more than happy to give it to him. I will see him Tuesday. Unless one of us experiences sickness/death/natural disaster, I am sure I will see him on Election Day. Sooooo - I'm going to see what he does, and if he doesn't ask me out I am seriously considering saying something like "You know, the next time you are sure to see me is in February. Do you really want to wait until then to ask me out?!"
That is awesome. I think you should say that also
I will be pulling for you

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#6 of 122 Old 11-02-2008, 09:56 PM
 
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I agree with the above! It sounds like he could be a bit shy, so why not take the first step?

Status for me. For those not following the oct. thread I met a man little over a month ago. We met in a nightclub where he came up to me and asked me if he could ask me out on a date. We talked all evening and agreed to meet again.
Our date was a week later and went sooo well! My first date in over 8 years! (I left my abusive ex in april) He stayed the night and totally hit a soft spot with me.
We met again the week after, but he was starting to get a bit cold feet. He is younger than me and has no kids - not even nephews or nieces - and feels it is a bit scary dating a single mom of three.

We have not been able to meet for the past couple of weeks - but I got fed up with waiting for him to find out what he wants to do, so wrote him a letter, saying I will not stick around until he decides what to do. He wrote me back that he did want to meet again - so I am visiting him this coming friday.

I am really torn - on one hand I am hopeful and have a lot of symptoms that could suggest I could be falling in love - on the other hand I am kind of suspecting he may back out, so am really nervous.. So I need some good vibes for the coming weekend..

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#7 of 122 Old 11-02-2008, 10:14 PM
 
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Hi fellow daters!

I had 3 dates this week!

Date #1-guy I dated earlier this year. Really like him. Can't figure him out though. He's all enthusiastic when we're together, but then it takes him days to respond to an e-mail. :

Date #2-an old ex. We went out on Halloween because my girls were with their dad. He's fun to hang out with but there's no possibility of it going further than that (at least for me)

Date #3-a friend of a dear family friend. Nice guy, very interesting. Lives off the grid in a very "green" house, has a vineyard, very liberal, smart. Bit outta my usual age range. He's 50, I'm 35. BUt hey, never say never. Date went well but I'm not sure what he thought of me.

So, when it rains it pours. I may be dateless for the next year, but this week was sure fun!
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#8 of 122 Old 11-03-2008, 11:19 AM
 
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oh my gosh beloved I got goosebumps reading your post! Congrats lady, you really deserve it!

I'm still living on cloud nine with my new guy. Well, most of the time. We've had a few small arguments which I was really worried about having. I've become really skittish when it comes to confrontation, which I think makes some sense having come out of an abusive relationship. Not that I ever thought he would do something, or even that he has much of a temper, but that on some level I was afraid he'd stop loving me. I know that sounds silly and irrational (it is).
But we did have a fight, and it was fine. We worked it out, and a lot of good conversations came out of it. So now it feels like a legitimate relationship because it's not always rainbows and butterflies.

He's actually been amazingly supportive. Unfortunately he's had ample opportunity to be emotionally, and he's really risen to the occasion. It's super great to have somebody to lean on but at the same time doesn't indulge me in my freaking out. He's pretty good at calming me down and helping me get more realistic. I've been a little stressed out.

He told me the other night that being with my kids is so great and makes him want to be part of their lives.... and makes him want to have kids of his own. I liked that. It was pretty sweet.
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#9 of 122 Old 11-03-2008, 01:41 PM
 
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Lunarforest, I too think it's important to have those skirmishes...pay close attention, I say...it's going to tell you what kind of man he is. When things get tough, how do they deal with the problem?

Send us postcards from Amsterdam, Beloved! I am so happy for you.

I am still so in transition... have a LDR going on. I'm thinking that I've never communicated verbally with someone so much--this might be a good thing! When you can only be on phone, text, video, email...I've found out more about him than the kids' dad in 10 years lol.

I'm going with it. He treats me like a friend, a person. After being entrenched in an abusive alcohol-driven situation, I feel like I can breathe.
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#10 of 122 Old 11-04-2008, 12:39 PM
 
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I do not have a very good update on my life. In fact very sad. I was with my man for three wonderful months. He told me he wanted to get a house together and he wanted to spend his life with me, he said all the right things and he was great with my kids. I got pregnant while on birth control and he said he didn't want more kids and he left me. Now, i am not only heartbroken but trying to figure out what to do with a pregnancy plus 5 children that i solely care for. I am also sad that everyone in my life is telling me to abort and although that may be the responsible thing to do, it feels very wrong to me. I am feeling pretty lost right now.
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#11 of 122 Old 11-04-2008, 01:42 PM
 
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wow avani, I'm so sorry. that sounds so hard. What a difficult situation to be in. PM me if you feel like you need to talk about it, I'm a good listener.
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#12 of 122 Old 11-04-2008, 05:35 PM
 
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Oh Avani! Hugs, big hugs to you - I'm thinking about you and wishing you peace.
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#13 of 122 Old 11-04-2008, 06:01 PM
 
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Avani. Such warm hugs for you. Having people in your life telling you to do something against your heart makes the situation so much worse.

This guy was never telling you the truth, you know. If he was fine with 5, how could 6 make him do something so cruel?

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#14 of 122 Old 11-04-2008, 06:18 PM
 
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Avani: Im so sorry I send you all my warmest thoughts and I wish you strength to make the very difficult decision What a cruel situation to put you in and then not take responsibility

Single mom to ds(8), dd(6) and ds(5)
 

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#15 of 122 Old 11-04-2008, 09:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Avani

                                Whatever will be, already is...
 
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#16 of 122 Old 11-04-2008, 10:35 PM
 
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Avani.
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#17 of 122 Old 11-04-2008, 10:42 PM
 
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oh, Avani, I am so sorry. And I totally agree with the PP who said he must have not been honest all along. I guess better to know now.

Blessings on your pregnancy!!

Robin~ single, work-at-home momma to my WonderBoys
YoungMan (6/00) & LittleBoy (6/04)
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#18 of 122 Old 11-04-2008, 11:22 PM
 
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Thank you, i tried talking to him today and he was very adament about not being able to be there for me and he was sorry but he just couldn't deal. So weird when just a few days ago we were looking for homes to buy and he was professing his love for me. My heart is broken/.
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#19 of 122 Old 11-04-2008, 11:27 PM - Thread Starter
 
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                                Whatever will be, already is...
 
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#20 of 122 Old 11-05-2008, 10:53 AM
 
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Avani

Maybe it's a panic reaction? Hopefully he will turn around and offer some support even if he disengages from your relationship (which is just
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#21 of 122 Old 11-05-2008, 11:08 PM
 
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I'm so sorry, Avani. How frightening and hard. Please take care of yourself.
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#22 of 122 Old 11-05-2008, 11:17 PM
 
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hopefully it is just panic, since it is such a huge turn-around so quickly. It doesn't make him look so good, but there's room to make it up.

Robin~ single, work-at-home momma to my WonderBoys
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#23 of 122 Old 11-05-2008, 11:19 PM
 
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Avani, I'm so sorry.
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#24 of 122 Old 11-06-2008, 11:07 AM
 
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Avani. Whatever decision you make will be the right one. So unfortunate that you have to make it all alone.

Rainbow.gif ~ Molly
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#25 of 122 Old 11-08-2008, 06:02 PM
 
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I got royally dumped. Im in love and my heart is broken. I havent felt like this in - well over 8 years. I had completely forgotten how devastating it feels to be dumped by someone you are in love with.

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#26 of 122 Old 11-08-2008, 08:11 PM
 
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oh my god Seie! I'm so sorry! What happened? (or is it too raw to talk about still?) That's awful, you don't don't deserve that.
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#27 of 122 Old 11-08-2008, 08:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Seie


I am so sorry

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#28 of 122 Old 11-08-2008, 09:35 PM
 
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Well in short - he's a really decent guy. I think he really wanted to fall in love - I had kind of urged him not to invite me over if he didnt mean it, but he didnt like breaking up on the phone, and I do think he had kind of hoped that once I was there he would discover that it really was "it". But it wasn't. Not for him anyway. He was very polite and spend most of the day listening to me sobbing and giving him compliments and just generally did everything in such a decent way that I fell even more in love and felt even more heartbroken that he cant be mine. I couldnt even be angry or bitter - isnt that horrible?
I know it sounds silly, but I only met him four times, yet I feel more connected to him than I ever did to my ex (whom I was with for nearly 8 years) It really puts my past choices into perspective. Im just hearbroken it has this kind of ending.. well that it has an ending at all really..

Now where to start - I feel totally ready to date! That may sound strange to some, but - well I feel ready for love, and I always had lots of it to give so who knows.. This guy did set rather a high standard though.. will be hard to live up to..

Single mom to ds(8), dd(6) and ds(5)
 

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#29 of 122 Old 11-08-2008, 10:08 PM
 
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I think that sounds smart, Seie. You gotta get back on the horse, ya know? I think it was actually a mistake that I waited so long (1.5 years) to start dating after I left my ex. I started putting too much stock in it, ya know? I think for some it's good to just get back out there and feel good about yourself again.

ETA: seie I clicked the DA link in your sig. Thank you, I have tears in my eyes - what a great site.
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#30 of 122 Old 11-10-2008, 04:29 AM
 
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I almost but not quite belong here but wanted to give Avani a

Amy ~ Web Designing Single Mom to 4: DD14, DS12, DS5, DS3
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