Str8 black woman co-parenting w/gay wht man (requiring possible immigration): thoughts? concerns? experiences? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 1 Old 03-01-2009, 10:15 PM - Thread Starter
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Hi! I'm new to MDC and at 35 years young, am considering pursuing a co-parenting arrangement that would require I emigrate to France. I've already lived in France before, and actually find that prospect to be quite compelling. But, I've never co-parented before and am aware that the questions I think we should discuss and hammer out, may not even be the tip of the iceberg. And so I turn to you!

My motives (feel free to skip if you just want to get to the heart of my prospective scenario): I'm 35, African American, a few months shy of completing my PhD, developing a writing career (still in a fledgling stage), live in a small town where I've had NO dating overtures in the year I've been here and have a uterus that once grew a cantaloupe-sized tumor that almost led to a hysterectomy. Soooo, I feel that time is of the essence. I'm not giving up on love, I just recognize it may take awhile and I'd rather it did than I jump into something moronic, with a moron just because I want to reproduce. As an only child who hasn't seen her father since she was 2, I'm determined not to "miss out" on biological motherhood too.

The Prospective Scenario: My preference is for a shared domicile with sufficient autonomous space for me and my co-parent, with the child(ren) somewhere in between. I'd like for the child(ren) to be born in the US (you know, in case they decide they want to be President someday! Love ya, Barack!), but I would expect that they would be raised primarily in France and the UK (where the daddy originates).

Now for the questions:
  • How have str8/gay co-parenting arrangements worked, generally?
  • How does France, particularly SW France, handle the legalities of shared parenting arrangements?
  • Where should I look for info about traveling with underage children with dual nationalities?
  • What are some worse-case scenarios that such an arrangement could produce?

Thank you for any constructive feedback you can provide!
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