Queer Conceptions - May 2009 - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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#121 of 234 Old 05-17-2009, 12:35 AM
 
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I have a lead on a new donor!

More than a lead. A friend said he would love to be my donor - I didn't ask, but I did mention I was looking for a new donor a few weeks ago and he's been thinking of it ever since. Of course, there's a catch, we wouldn't be able to start until September.

I still have June and possibly July with the current donor boy, so it wouldn't be a huge deal.

It's still not for sure, nailed down, for sure, but it's looking possible!

SPBC Finally a Papa! Elise Ember Soleil - 10/3/10 - 4:09 AM - 6 lbs 8 oz My daughter eats donor milk! Human milk for human babies!
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#122 of 234 Old 05-17-2009, 02:49 AM
 
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Wow, it's so nice to read about other people in the same boat!
I've been on MDC plenty before but really tend to lurk.
DP (43) & I (31) have been together 8 yrs. We have a 3.5 yr old dd, whom we conceived in our very first IUI attempt in 2004.
To save $ (I'm a SAHM now), we did an insem at home (using a baby oral syringe & a shot glass!) in December 2008. My 1st positive hpt was Christmas Day, the final day of our 2ww. Because of the timing, I really did look at this as a huge blessing that was clearly meant to be. The baby was our Christmas present! I became pg 2 out of 2 times!
Sadly, I m/c at 6 wks in January. Not a good way to start off 2009.
We tried another at home insem in April, but I think my timing was off; this one didn't take despite the many pg symptoms I convinced myself I had. On May 8, I had an ICI (the sperm was unwashed, & would have cost an add'l $600.00 for IUI). So, I'm currently enduring the dreaded 2ww (didn't know that abbreviation until recently!). No signs of AF, but persistent pelvic pressure, twitches, & feeling of "enlarging"; it's weird, like my uterus is stretching right away because I've been pg twice before). BUT, I'm trying not to get excited or even *too* invested. This was the last of the 4 sperm vials we purchased in 2004. DP & I have agreed, mainly due to $ & her age, that this would be our final attempt.
I've enjoyed reading the posts! Good luck to everyone ttc!

Proud WOHM veggie mom to Alina 7/29/05 & partner, Jackie, since 2001, m/c 1/2009
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#123 of 234 Old 05-17-2009, 03:41 PM
 
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Hi guys. BFN today at 15dpo. And our RE instructed us to stop the prometrium and enduce a period. As soon as that starts, dw goes in for baseline bloodwork and we will start the whole deal over again. We are definitely switching to IUI this month...staying on the clomid, but increasing the dose (probably)...Full speed ahead!

dw and I are going to do some therapeutic baby shopping today. We read about another ttc friend who bought something for baby with each negative, and at first it sounded like torture...but we are to the point that it actually keeps the hope going for us and it feels good...keeps us focused on the future and not so wrapped up in the series of tww's.

Can't wait to hear about others results...let's get some BFP's!
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#124 of 234 Old 05-17-2009, 05:34 PM
 
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S & K, I'm so sorry. I know you guys want this so much. Therapeutic baby shopping sounds perfect!
Yesterday we had a yard sale at my parents' house and our secret baby clothes collection was brought to light... by the presence of SIX (yes, six) boxes of baby clothes that cover every age from 0 - 3 (or 4)! I don't think anyone had realized quite how much therapeutic baby shopping we've done over the years! It does help us though, to know that it will someday happen and that we will be prepared with this large history of life and our experiences and choices over the years to guide us through parenthood with grace and style. It will happen for you too!

Hey, we should plan a MA get-together when you guys get here!

K, H, and baby E (who is now three!!!)
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#125 of 234 Old 05-17-2009, 09:14 PM
 
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papa - that's great about the new donor! Good luck.

I'm not clear when/if I ovulated this cycle. I think a week ago - so I guess that puts me half-way through the tww. Life is kind of crappy right now since the layoff - so I haven't really been thinking about ttc that much, which is good, I guess.

It's nice to see so many new people popping up - welcome!

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#126 of 234 Old 05-17-2009, 11:18 PM - Thread Starter
 
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We just had a fantastic dinner with lesbian friends of our who had their first little one nearly 2 months ago. Oh my, was it ever nice to be able to hold a beautiful squishy newbie. She was just sweet a pie. If ever I though that I didn't feel like going through the emotional ups and downs of trying again, holding this little one has showed me that I sure do. And that I think I could really handle a toddler/preschooler and a baby okay. Please please let our donor be available to come visit us sooner rather than later.

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Originally Posted by egarcia76 View Post
So, I'm currently enduring the dreaded 2ww (didn't know that abbreviation until recently!). No signs of AF, but persistent pelvic pressure, twitches, & feeling of "enlarging"; it's weird, like my uterus is stretching right away because I've been pg twice before). BUT, I'm trying not to get excited or even *too* invested. This was the last of the 4 sperm vials we purchased in 2004. DP & I have agreed, mainly due to $ & her age, that this would be our final attempt.
I've enjoyed reading the posts! Good luck to everyone ttc!
Welcome to the thread! I've added you to the 2WW group in the first post.

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Originally Posted by srjb View Post
Hi guys. BFN today at 15dpo. And our RE instructed us to stop the prometrium and enduce a period. As soon as that starts, dw goes in for baseline bloodwork and we will start the whole deal over again. We are definitely switching to IUI this month...staying on the clomid, but increasing the dose (probably)...Full speed ahead!
I'm so sorry. I hope that next month brings a great result for you. I've moved you back to Waiting to O.

lemurmommies, loving wife to ruvalokiteshvara, proud moms to our intact son E (12/06), and mourning the loss of our daughter Noelle (stillborn 12/08).
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#127 of 234 Old 05-17-2009, 11:40 PM
 
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So, I just wanted to post to say that event though this is my first go round, I'm already beginning to get impatient with this 2ww. Once I realized the nausea and headache could never be a pregnancy symptom at 2dpo, I chilled out for the weekend and didn't really worry about it. This week I'm going to immerse myself in my work while the wife's away on business so I don't think about it as much. A friend of mine who had IVF to conceive talked about how long it can feel to get through 9mos when you know you're pregnant within a couple of weeks of conception. I'm starting to understand what she's talking about.

Today is 4dpo for me and starting with 6dpo I've decided to wear a pantyliner to see if I spot at all from implantation. (I never spot before a period so this will be definite indicator for me) I'm also going to see a new gynie on Friday and will make sure she doesn't test me for pregnancy. I'll be 9dpo but we really want to wait until our 6 mos wedding anniversary to test and we'll be 16dpo as of that date.


Srjb, sorry to hear about your result but I'll be sending some positive energy your way.

Papa - Congrats on the new donor!

Crunchy- I'm with you about "patiently" waiting.

Have a great week everyone!

Madly in love w/DW by the same name, mourning the baby girl we lost and expecting another baby in December 2010!
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#128 of 234 Old 05-18-2009, 08:17 AM
 
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Kimlyn - do you know if it's okay to do a pap smear when you're in the tww? I'm getting a physical not this month, but next and if I don't get my BFP this time I'll be in the tww around then. Is that okay?

lemur - yay for squishy new babies! they're the best!

K, H, and baby E (who is now three!!!)
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#129 of 234 Old 05-18-2009, 02:29 PM
 
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Osker, I'm not sure about the pap. I'm going to call and find out b/c there's no use in going if I can't get that done.

5dpo and counting!

Madly in love w/DW by the same name, mourning the baby girl we lost and expecting another baby in December 2010!
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#130 of 234 Old 05-18-2009, 03:48 PM
 
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Kimlyn and Osker - I'm sure it's fine, but I wouldn't do it!

I'm paranoid like that.

I am feeling DANGEROUSLY hopeful. I keep feeling weird little cramps and twitches mostly on my right.

It's been going on since the day of O. COULD IT BE????

Also, my yogurt, which I make myself and is always the same, tasted and smelled downright weird this AM. I threw it in my smoothie anyway, and it was fine. But it smelled weird when I opened the container.

I AM MAKING MYSELF CRAZY!!!!

SPBC Finally a Papa! Elise Ember Soleil - 10/3/10 - 4:09 AM - 6 lbs 8 oz My daughter eats donor milk! Human milk for human babies!
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#131 of 234 Old 05-18-2009, 04:13 PM
 
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Papa, I'm feeling the exact opposite of you! I'm so sure that it couldn't possibly have worked for us yet again. I have noticed that I've had heartburn every day when I get hungry or right after I eat (nice, eh?) since 2dpo, but that could be major stress in our lives right now... and then yesterday I had low level cramps for half the day... but that could have been due to driving a lot the day before (which hurts my back)...
Other than those two things, which I don't believe in, I have no other reason to think that this month is any different than any other.
Although I am trying to get as much work done toward my dissertation as possible just in case!

K, H, and baby E (who is now three!!!)
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#132 of 234 Old 05-18-2009, 04:14 PM
 
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papa, oooh, sounds very promising to me!! fx!!

g

my family - dp d heartbeat.gif, ds b biggrinbounce.gif (4), ds f thumbsuck.gif (2), dd a baby.gif (jan '12), ddog m dog2.gif
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#133 of 234 Old 05-18-2009, 04:50 PM
 
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Kimlyn and Osker, I had a pap after my first BFP last year so it's definitely possible. However, I would definitely not do it again if I had the choice unless there was a really good reason for it. Not that it was traumatic or anything...I just think it was unnecessary.

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#134 of 234 Old 05-18-2009, 08:16 PM
 
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Carmen, my concern is that I have no BFP yet so I think I'd rather be safe than sorry. If I have it and don't get the BFP I'm anxiously waiting for, I'll think maybe that had something to do with it.

I'm calling the gynie tomorrow.

Madly in love w/DW by the same name, mourning the baby girl we lost and expecting another baby in December 2010!
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#135 of 234 Old 05-19-2009, 01:07 PM
 
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Osker- I agree... whether it is fine or not, I would worry and I would always wonder if that was the reason for no BFP if I didn't end up pregnant that month.

I don't remember when I last updated, but basically my body was gearing up to ovulate and it didn't. Today is cycle day 24 and my EWCM is back full force, my sex drive is up, I'm having crazy dreams, and I am having major ovulation pain so I am sure that I will ovulate soon. Still no positive OPK though? I wonder if they just don't work for some people. I guess I'll see what I get today! I'm am hoping and praying that I ovulate before my sweetie goes out of town Thursday through Sunday (maybe Monday) for work.

I told her that if it happens while she is gone I don't want to go in to be inseminated. She was kind of upset about that, but it just does not feel right to me to try and conceive OUR baby if she is not there! On the other hand, we really want to do this while we are still in California for legal reasons (long story.) How do you ladies feel about that? Would you inseminate without your partner present? Hopefully it won't be an issue, but she is leaving Thursday morning at 8am, so it could happen!

Mama to two, and second-time surrogate. Expecting May 2015.
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#136 of 234 Old 05-19-2009, 02:26 PM
 
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Well KS, the two out of four tries that I actually got pregnant were when I went by myself! Don't know if that means something, but...

PROUD mama to Amiya, age 6 , and Asher, born 10/2009 . Loving partner to dp, Amy.
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#137 of 234 Old 05-19-2009, 03:10 PM
 
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KS...I went by myself too. DP had just started a new job...and was in training that day. No way out of it...so rather than skip a cycle...we went with it. And here we are...anxiously waiting for his arrival!!! For us...DP doesn't feel like she missed out at all. It hasn't been an issue what-so-ever. But, I think we looked at it as more clinical than personal. The end result is all that was important to us. We got our BFP...and no regrets.

DS Alexander Joseph born 6/29/09
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#138 of 234 Old 05-19-2009, 03:20 PM
 
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KS - does it help to think that conception doesn't actually occur at the insemination?

I mean, she could go with you and then leave, but you might not actually conceive for a few hours!

My point is that even if she were there for the insemination, it wouldn't mean she was there for the conception.

It's even WORSE if you were getting pregnant at home with fresh sperm (you'd like to think all those straight couples are having magical simultaneous orgasms and conceiving, but the reality is that they can have sex and the sperm and be all romantic and actually conceive in the middle of a huge fight four days later).

I'm just sayin'.

AFM - I'm back to feeling less than hopeful. BAH! FF has me pegged at 6 DPO. The days are CRAWLING by. I suppose I'll start testing around Saturday, 10 DPO.

SPBC Finally a Papa! Elise Ember Soleil - 10/3/10 - 4:09 AM - 6 lbs 8 oz My daughter eats donor milk! Human milk for human babies!
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#139 of 234 Old 05-19-2009, 03:41 PM
 
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srjb So sorry about the BFN. But yes, we're still up for meet up of some kind whe you guys visit.

Papa: Awesome about the new donor! Still hoping you don't have to use him, though.

: for all in the TWW. Who's testing next?

AFM: I'm at CD1, so can I please be moved to Waiting to O? I have the results from my 7DPO bloodwork. TSH was 1.676 which seems pretty much normal. Progesterone was 7.8, which the tech said was in the "normal range," but according to the numbers I looked up is low. The midwives were out at a conference today, so I coludn't talk to them, but I'll be calling tomorrow AM to discuss what we should do. I'm guessing prog. cream or other supplement. Hopefully that will do the trick, and we'll get out BFP before DW goes off to camp.

Living with my DW, ourcat.gifAstrid, my mom and dad, and their dog and cats, too.  Hoping to start TTC with my OSO as baby-daddy soonish!

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#140 of 234 Old 05-19-2009, 04:13 PM
 
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Hi all,
Just checking in. Had been having short, asymptomatic fevers for several months (including the preggo months), so I got a specialist and got tested for a zillion scary diseases. Turns out I have plain old mono. Nothing scary or life-threatening, just annoying.

On the TTC front, we had planned for me to do IVF this month, then were told I might have a scary disease and should wait for test results, and then were told I only have mono but should still wait a while.

So now we're up in the air -- should we have Fozziebear do IUI in 2 weeks, or should I start IVF in 3 weeks? Grr! I'm used to being on the TTC roller coaster, but now it's Space Mountain -- I'm in the dark and have no idea where we're headed. Whee?

Geek. TTC since 09/2008. M/cs 01/2009, 12/2009. IVF 7/2009, 10/2009, 1/2010.
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#141 of 234 Old 05-19-2009, 04:30 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FtMPapa View Post
KS - does it help to think that conception doesn't actually occur at the insemination?

I mean, she could go with you and then leave, but you might not actually conceive for a few hours!

My point is that even if she were there for the insemination, it wouldn't mean she was there for the conception.

It's even WORSE if you were getting pregnant at home with fresh sperm (you'd like to think all those straight couples are having magical simultaneous orgasms and conceiving, but the reality is that they can have sex and the sperm and be all romantic and actually conceive in the middle of a huge fight four days later).

I'm just sayin'.
That is kind of what I was thinking, but it just seems weird if she were to be gone for days at a time. In the end maybe I will just go because if we don't try this cycle we don't get to try again until August or September... Though I'm feeling SO ready to ovulate I think I'd be shocked if I didn't get a positive OPK today. I'm going to test in another hour or so. Then we'd be going in tomorrow together.

Astropeep- wow all kinds of things going on there! Hope the best decisions make themselves clear.

Mama to two, and second-time surrogate. Expecting May 2015.
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#142 of 234 Old 05-19-2009, 05:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Updated to here!

lemurmommies, loving wife to ruvalokiteshvara, proud moms to our intact son E (12/06), and mourning the loss of our daughter Noelle (stillborn 12/08).
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#143 of 234 Old 05-19-2009, 05:44 PM
 
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Not trusting the OPK's we were using, I decided to go to the pharmacy and get some digital ones and... I got a ! We will be able to go in together! :

Mama to two, and second-time surrogate. Expecting May 2015.
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#144 of 234 Old 05-19-2009, 05:48 PM
 
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Hi all. I lurk mostly. DW and I have a 2 y/o son. We want a second but things are complicated, so we're not TTC at the moment, and right now I don't know when we will.

Anyway...

Wanted to say "go for it" to KS. I personally wouldn't want to miss an opportunity.

Me: almost 40, RN DW: 38, CPD Boy: born 4/2/2007 Girl: born 8/23/2010
Queer Parenting since 2007
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#145 of 234 Old 05-19-2009, 07:34 PM
 
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KS - YAY!!

That is great! Good luck!

SPBC Finally a Papa! Elise Ember Soleil - 10/3/10 - 4:09 AM - 6 lbs 8 oz My daughter eats donor milk! Human milk for human babies!
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#146 of 234 Old 05-19-2009, 09:56 PM
 
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Hi all, I am back from my trip and getting caught up now!

FtMPapa - Yay! That's so exciting! The new donor and the hopefullness for this cycle, that is. It's so awesome when an opportunity presents itself like that. Hopefully you won't need it tho

Hi egarcia76 and welcome. Good luck! We did our IUI on the 7th, so we are close.

srjb - hugs. I like the creative approach to the BFN.

osker - that is A LOT of secret baby clothes! I'm jealous

astropeep - WOW! Good that more info is coming along. Hope it's clear soon. Why did they say that you should wait?

Yay KSDoulaMama, I'm glad that you can insem together. I totally get the weird feeling of doing it on your own. I'm not sure what I'd do cos it'd be torture to prolong it another month, but I kinda like having the team mate. At least for now while it's all so new for me.

AFU - I may have started spotting this morning? Or not? Who knows. Today would be 11DPO and would also be the day that I'd get AF. I bought FOUR trashy magazines at the airport to keep my mind off it. Now that I'm back home, I'm going to test tonight when my partner gets home from work. And, I will repeat, constantly, between now and then: I will get the baby that I'm supposed to get, at the time I'm supposed to get it. Plz remind me if I return with a BFN

Me + DP + 2 rescue lap dogs = True Love Always
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#147 of 234 Old 05-20-2009, 12:21 AM
 
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Osker - I talked to my RE today and they said not to get the pap until we know what's going on. So, tomorrow I will call and cancel. Hopefully I'll be rescheduling for an OB visit instead of a GYN only visit.

Yesterday I had some cramping for a couple of hours. Today my back was hurting, I was more tired than usual and I just started to cramp a bit again. I've also gotten a couple of twinges here and there. No other symptoms at this time and I am 6dpo.

Let's see what tomorrow brings!

Madly in love w/DW by the same name, mourning the baby girl we lost and expecting another baby in December 2010!
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#148 of 234 Old 05-20-2009, 12:21 PM
 
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Still no AF, but HPT magic 8-ball says "better luck next month", both last night and this morning. The good news is that my luteal phase is longer (if this is 12 DPO and no AF).

I have to say, taking the test was such a relief, even if it was a BFN. TWW? Soooooooo really really not enjoyable for me!

Me + DP + 2 rescue lap dogs = True Love Always
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#149 of 234 Old 05-20-2009, 07:00 PM
 
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MP, I know what you mean... I HATE waiting! For anything. However, a longer luteal phase OR a pregnancy both sound good!

Kimlyn- Good luck!

I am officially in the 2ww now! Our insemination went just fine. It was lovely. My mother in law is in town but we sent her off into the city to go to some museums and stuff and DW took the day off of work in honor of our first insem. Afterwards we went for ice cream at my favorite ice cream place that is near the sperm bank and went home for some snuggling. We were going to watch If These Walls Could talk 2 (haha, the last segment!) but it turns out we can not find the DVD. Oh well! Feeling happy about finally inseminating! :

Mama to two, and second-time surrogate. Expecting May 2015.
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#150 of 234 Old 05-20-2009, 07:10 PM
 
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KSDoulaMama - Congrats! I'm not sure if MIL is staying with you but can I suggest a big O tonight. The RE said they've heard it can help and it surely doesn't hurt.

MilletPuff - The wait is driving me crazy too, but I'm not stressing over it too much.

AFM, I'm now 7DPO. I have been uncomfortably dry for the last two days. A couple of pimples popped up on my face and I've had twinges of pain periodically. I've been craving different junk food like McDonalds (which I haven't eaten in over 2 months) and ice cream. Last night I didn't' go to bed until after 2. I was tired all day but for some reason got a second wind around 11pm.

I went and bought 5 dollar store tests in preparation for the day when we're ready to do so. It's so odd to me that they sell hpts. DW asked if I snuck and tested and I said no b/c it's early and I'd rather wait. We are going to move up our test date. We'll start testing on Sunday (11dpo) or Monday (12dpo).

Madly in love w/DW by the same name, mourning the baby girl we lost and expecting another baby in December 2010!
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