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#61 of 486 Old 07-05-2010, 07:06 PM
 
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QOTD 1

I have thought about surrogacy. I had very easy pregnancies and simple, uncomplicated births. I was also completely detatched from my DD for the first couple of weeks (thought she had some issues going on, which I would have learned to deal with, but very much not a bonding experinece in those early weeks), so I think if I had as many kids as I wanted (DP has upped her desired number to 7, LOL, so I don't see it happening any time soon) I could see going into it expecting to be carrying someone else's child and come out on the other side pretty ok.

I have a slightly harder time saying, yeah, I would like to adopt, but I would carry someone else's kid.

QOTD 2

Yeah, I'm amazingly comfortable talking about this stuff to strangers. I don't talk about my own personal mucous and cervix, but I talk about generalizations. The girls at work drill me all the time about it, they're mostly all on the pill, so it's a really different cycle, but my cousin, I just talked with her about how to actually know what's going on with her cycle, since she's nursing. Yeah, I am a nurse, tho. I can talk talk about anything without blushing or, really even thinking it's weird (I start a lot of conversations with, Hi, how are you today? Are you having any pain? Have your bowels moved lately?). - tho at the same time, I got really grumpy with DP for trying to hand me a tampon in front of the bathroom at tractor supply the other day, tho I think that may have had more to do with the upsetness about still not being pregnant than the modesty.

I also have a lot of practice answering the, "do they have the same daddy" questions, which leads to a lot of other questions. Questions about how girls get pregnant. Interestingly, no one has ever asked me how they guys do their half.

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#62 of 486 Old 07-05-2010, 07:51 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 2happymamas View Post
AmandaHope: Talk to your doctor about trying Femara, as opposed to Clomid. According to the RE we use, using Femara has a reduce likelihood of multiple follicles v. Clomid. The RE explained that he usually sees one dominant, better quality follicle when using Femara than the mulitple, not-so-great quality follicles on Clomid.
Thank you for this useful advice! I will!

QOTD 2: I'm very comfortable talking about the process (KD issues, names/labels, even some of the insemination details), though I don't generally describe my cervix or CM to anyone but DP and my two closest friends (one of whom is KD's wife who is dealing with infertility and is all to familiar with the nitty gritty). I did, however, say on Friday to my acupuncturist/chiropractor (who is helping me maximize fertility), that I needed to do cervix-opening visualizations in prep for Saturday's insemination. As I was leaving, he said, "I'll focus my thoughts on your cervix!" He is my age and rather attractive (for a man ), so I was embarrassed.

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#63 of 486 Old 07-05-2010, 10:52 PM
 
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AmandaHope--- You may have just opened up a barrage of u/s questions On what CD would you suggest to u/s, then follow up? Since my DP is an NP, she could order them no problem. I don't have insur, so I'd have to pay, but could possibly get a professional discount, AND it would be comparable to what we're spending on OPKs anyway. I am truly convinced, that our big issue is timing, and if I can just catch that darn egg we'll be in business. (however I do have my questions about the quality of the sample we've been using the last 8 mos, but that's a different post)

Gelly-- SO sorry for your loss, hopefully there will be good news soon.

QOTD 1
Judging by how attached I am to the baby I haven't even conceived yet, I don't think I would be a good surrogacy candidate. As much as I would love to be able to give that gift to someone, I just don't think I could do it. Secondly, being an adoptee myself (even though surrogacy is different) I understand that wound that a child feels when they know that the heartbeat that is holding them is not the heartbeat they heard for 9 months.

QOTD2
Im comfortable talking about this whole process with friends who know we are ttc, but that list is very limited. We arent "out" to a lot of my friends and family (lord knows how we'll handle that once Im pg, but that's another bridge), so Im pretty quiet about it for the most part. Ive gone back and forth from being super vocal, to now, not really telling anyone when we are actively trying/inseminating, etc. just to ease some of the pressure.

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#64 of 486 Old 07-05-2010, 11:50 PM
 
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Miss Scarlett Others can weigh in with their experiences, since I've only done u/s for one cycle so far, but my RE (actually the NP) had me come in on CD11, and then I went back in on CD13. That way, the NP could see how fast the follicles were growing. On day 11, my lead follicle was 13mm, and on day 13, it was 17mm, so she proscribed me a trigger to take on the night of day 14 (when the follicle would be 19+mm), and I think I Oed about 24 hours post trigger (though I followed the NP's advice to do the insem at 36 hours post trigger). If you are paying for the u/s, you probably only want to do one u/s, but that could be tricky, bc you do want to see how fast the follicle is growing. They usually grow 1-2mm/day, but the difference between 1 and 2 is a significant difference for timing. The issue is that without the trigger, even if you could figure out when the follicle is mature (19-20mm), you'd still have to try to detect the LH surge in order to get the timing right. If your DP could prescribe the trigger, that would be ideal. I had to pay for mine, and it was $85. I hope all this info helps a bit. Maybe there is research out there about the usual timing gap between the time a follicle is mature and O. I don't know much about that.

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#65 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 08:51 AM
 
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Wehrli: Thanks for the distracting waiting to O update! I'm glad you're feeling zen! It certainly can't hurt the TTC process, and maybe it can save a bit of your sanity! I hope tomorrow's ultrasound and trigger go just as planned.

AmandaMom: I remain in awe of your awesome temp regularity, and also wanted to acknowledge that you and your DP seem to have the most exciting and fun social lives. I can tell that your wedding trip is going to be super fun!

Indigo: Your poor DP! I hope the abx work fast!

AmandaHope: I love that chiropractor story! I join him in focusing my thoughts on your cervix. Or on implantation, now!

Scarlett: I hope you get the info that you need to make some choices about future cycles! What are your concerns about your sperm?

Library? Bunny? Any news?

AFM: Temps are still high (though not as high as yesterday's spike), though I did post my first morning temp, from when I got up to feed the dogs (sooo ready for my DP to return and take over this early morning task!), and I had another ridiculous 99 that I took after falling back asleep that I discarded because I'd only been sleeping for and hour. The chart as it is is eerily tracking my pregnancy cycle, but I'm starting to wonder if I'm just willing it to be that way! Another BFN this morning, but I'm trying not to worry about it until at least tomorrow (12DPO, when I got my last positive) or beyond...

Joyful, busy, often overwhelmed queer academic mama to an awesome toddler and:

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#66 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 09:15 AM - Thread Starter
 
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beastie, your chart amazes me...

scarlett, i've had only one cycle of monitoring with u/s, as well. but this is what my "cycle instructions" say. u/s on CD3 to make sure there are no cysts left over from last cycle (usually only needed if starting fertility drugs). 2nd u/s is scheduled 4-5 days after last day of clomid (CD11-12). another u/s will be scheduled for 2-3 days later (depending on current size) if follicles aren't mature enough. so my first cycle i had u/s on CD3, CD12 and again on CD15. they told me to trigger that night and come back 36hrs later for IUI. which is good because if i had me wait any longer i would have just o'd on my own on CD17... i got pg that cycle, i m/c but it worked and i try to focus on that positive. so if you have an idea about when you usually O, i would do the u/s just 2-3 days before then. and i agree with AHope, if you can/will do the trigger, DO IT!

QOTD: i am pretty open IRL... probably more than most would prefer. if someone seems uncomfortable, i back off with the details, but i figure if they asked questions, they will get my unadulterated answers! i figure after all we've been through in this process i want to be as helpful as i can to anyone who may benefit from the info!

indigo, my first thought about these gals is that once you agreed to talk about your experience they got intimidated and weren't sure that the party was the place to discuss this info. maybe they are hoping that you can get together in a more intimate setting to discuss this?? that's my worth

afm, back to work today... as i'm sure a lot of you are. BFF is leaving tomorrow night and i'm trying to get enough work done today so i can at least take a half day tomorrow afternoon so i can take her to the airport... but i already have friday off in prep for insem and also to get ready for the RenFaire to open... we've got more painting to do before we open

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#67 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 10:05 AM
 
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Oops, I forgot to answer the QOTD! I'm pretty open about talking about all elements of TTC, though I'm selective about my audience. I talk all the time with a few queer and straight friends who are themselves in the midst of all this, and also to queer folks gearing up or considering TTC. But I'm not "out" about TTC at work, and I try to minimize the details I share with my and DP's families, just to help them feel more organic about the fact that the hypothetical kid is as much a part of the families as any other kid would be, regardless of conception.

Indigo, I agree with Wehrli that the women at the party might be at the early stage, of wanting to know more but not being quite ready to jump right in. I'd let them set the pace, and then tell them as much as feels comfortable! I know that I had NO IDEA about a lot of fertility stuff before we started TTC, and was amazed at how little I knew, considering that I thought I was pretty in touch with and educated about my body.

Back to work for me too... in the heat. ugh.

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#68 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 10:53 AM
 
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Beastie:

RE: Sperm concerns. Ill try to make this concise. Okay, so one "sample" from the donor yields many, approx 20, vials for ICI or IUI, right? The very first ICI we did back in October 2008, were the last 3 vials from a particular sample from our donor. We got pregnant (FIRST TIME), and then m/s @ about 6 1/2 weeks. Every subsequent (approx 8) insemination we have done, were all from same donor, but a new sample (all 8 same sample), and nothing. Not one more + hCG. We've done 3 clomid cycles. SO although I have nothing to base it on but my feelings, I wonder about the quality of this sample. I know that with the freezing, thawing processes there are most certainly points that will/can/do damage the quality, and I wonder if something a little screwy happened with this one. I have one vial left from this donor (the one we just had our hearts set on) and it is from the same questionable sample, but its bought & paid for, and he's retired, so we're gonna give it one last go and then we'll have to pick a new donor, but will get the advantage of a new sample...soooo......

AmandaHope & Werli

THANKS!! I could most certainly do the trigger, and at this point, I think the benefits outweigh the risks... Im gonna go with the flow this cycle, and then next, since we'll have to pick a new donor (if we dont get great news from this cycle) I think Ill adopt a whole new process and go for the u/s + trigger. My biggest issue (as Im sure is true for all of you) is that there is SO MUCH conflicting information out there, it is hard to wade through it all. I so much prefer advise, suggestions, information here, from personal experience, over trying to sift through generic medical information.... SO THANK YOU!

Something I have been doing new this cycle, is more meditation. Just a few minutes in the morning before the DP/Doggies wake up, focusing on a bright swirly light going from my heart, to my little ovaries saying GROW little follicles G-R-O-W!!!

WE WILL MOST LIKELY IUI ON NEXT FRIDAY-ish (7/9/10)

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#69 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 12:04 PM
 
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So I have been goooone for a super long time, and I'm sorry about that. I'm not going to even contemplate trying personals, but I'll jump back in with those in a bit, I promise.

Last month was hard...I was really frustrated with the whole not trying thing, and I was really looking forward to trying again this cycle. Then, I started the new job, and they gave us a HUGE lecture on our benefits and our pre-existing conditions clause during orientation. It kind of freaked me out, so I emailed our benefits coordinator to find out about pregnancy. Of course, she was out of the office and I was supposed to O in the next day or so. So I decided to err on the side of caution and sit out this cycle as well. Sigh. Hopefully she'll tell me it's okay and I can go ahead for next month, but I may end up having to wait until SEPTEMBER!!! ARGH! On the up side, I finally told my sister, with the caveat that she was never to mention it to anyone and she was never to ask me if I was pregnant. I have vague concerns with having told her, though, because her partner and my exDW had an affair long ago. While I don't think they're still speaking, it still worries me a bit.

QOTD 1: I'd love to surrogate for someone close to me. When DW and I first started talking about trying, her BFF said he'd donate for us if I'd carry his as well. The plan was to alternate--one for us, one for him, etc. At this point, I don't think I'd be willing to alternate like that, but after I'm done having mine (two, if I stay single, more if someone else is there to help and wants more), I'd be perfectly happy to do so for close friends or family. I have two sisters, and I know one is fertile, but if the other one and her partner weren't able to carry, I'd volunteer. My mother actually offered to carry for some family friends when I was younger (though they decided to adopt instead), so it's something I've been aware of for a long time.

QOTD 2: I'm with seraf on this one--I'm a nurse, we have to talk about everything anyway. If someone knows I'm trying, then they know pretty much all about it. If they ask, I'll happily tell. They'll stop me if they don't want to hear it!

Christie: taking a break until further notice on TTC #1
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#70 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 12:43 PM
 
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Beastie - Sorry about your BFN this morning, but it's still very early, and your chart looks GREAT! It's funny what you said about my and DP's social lives... we only recently started going out. Very recently, in fact. We moved here a year ago and have had a hard time making friends. We're city girls in a tiny town, and that took some getting used to. There is a nearby "city" where we've been hanging out recently, but it's population is like 120,000, and we're used to *millions*. This past weekend I've been more socially active than I have in the past year, and I think it's because we're not TTC this cycle. That makes me kinda sad, and I just want to go out and forget all about it!

Miss Scarlett - The meditation sounds like a fantastic idea!

chiquitayy - So glad to see you back on the board. I hope you are able to give it a go this cycle!

indigo - I agree with wehrli that maybe that couple was a little shy about approaching you in that setting. Maybe you could take the lead and invite them over sometime? I sure wish someone had done that with us... Which brings me to your QOTD:

I had no problem talking details with my SIL during her visit last month, but she was completely clueless, and it was like I was teaching her. There's another couple in the area who used the same RE, but we haven't gone so far as to discuss CM or anything like that. I probably wouldn't have a problem with it, though. On the other hand, it's certainly not something I bring up to strangers!

Speaking of CM, I've got some EW today... O is coming. DOES ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN GET SOME SPERM?????

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#71 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 01:13 PM
 
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Hey ladies~

Back home at last~ had a nice weekend seeing my dad and the rest of my family. Also got to meet my cousin's baby Iphigenia, which I found out they're pronouncing 'Eye-phigenia' so it's not only pretentious but incorrect. The scariest thing though is that the baby doesn't seem 'right'. She barely weighs 11 pounds, doesn't move or focus much, and my cousin breast feeds every hour, but the baby throws it all up right afterwards. BUT cousin won't listen to anyone's advice to feed her cereal or maybe formula supplement. She also won't let her hubby hold or feed the baby. It's really weird and kind of scary. I hope it all turns well, but I fear for the baby.

This is such a busy board! Gone for 24 hours and there's so much to respond to! I'll miss many people doing personals now, but I'll be catching up in the near future.

Beastie, it's looking good for you! I love your chart. My temp's still pretty up and is looking excitingly triphasic, but of course I can't assume or even get too excited. We're testing Thursday morning, I believe. I thought about testing this morning but then didn't. I can't stand that blank spot where there should be a line, so if I have to look at it I'm only going to do so when I have to. I also have a hoard of the digital kind that I'm going to pee on when/if I get a positive pink line. I can't stand looking at the NOT PREGNANT, but I'm eager to look at the PREGNANT, so I"m saving them up.

Team Amanda Power! AmandaH~ I'm slightly jealous of your indulging on the 4th. I didn't have as much problem refusing alcohol as I did refusing cokes and cups of coffee without explaining. I just 'wasn't thirsty' a lot, then snuck over and drank water. AmandaM~ wish I had some sperm to offer. Hopefully we'll have one vial left after this SUCCESS CYCLE. If you want a guy who's 6 ft tall and half Portuguese, we might could hook you up! Escher~ thanks for all the good thoughts. Keep those fingers crossed.


Scarlett~ I've never had Clomid, but I've had plenty of Femara and I have found that it made my opks very clear, and when we did the ultrasound the folllies were very clearly present. It was nice to see. I do recommend, if you're looking for the extra boost.

Still dreaming of multiples. I hope my body's telling my mind something...

Sorry for everyone i didn't get to, I'll be better from now on!

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#72 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 01:24 PM
 
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Hi Everyone,

AmandaMom: Good luck surviving the O without sperm! I agree with you that sitting out a cycle is frustrating. I'm hoping you and I end up being TWW buddies next cycle--the other two Amandas will have already gotten their bfps by then.

Chiquitayy: Nice to hear from you! I'm sorry you're having to deal with waiting--that's no fun! It's neat you were able to tell your sister.

Miss Scarlett: It's exciting that your insem time is coming soon! I hope this is the one for you, and I'm also glad that you have a plan in case it isn't.

Wehrli: I'm sorry that your bff has to leave. I'm so excited that you are going to conceive so soon now!

Beastie: Impressive temps! I look forward to hearing your good news tomorrow.

QOTD: I have a few friends IRL who are also TTC, and I'm willing to discuss things like CM, periods, etc. with them. I am most comfortable talking about what I've learned or generally what I find most helpful, and I prefer not to share a detailed daily account of what my body is doing.

Gellybeangrl: Your temps look great, and I see you're still getting bfns. It could be the progesterone screwing with you, or it could be that you're just going to get your bfp later. Are you going to keep waiting, or get a beta, or something else?

Library: Your chart looks great. I'm keeping everything crossed!

AFM: We're going to visit some of my family tomorrow for almost a week, so I may not have time to post. I'm looking forward to reading all your exciting news whenever I do get near the internet!

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#73 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 02:46 PM
 
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ok, guys, so we were all off on our reason why the couple didn't come talk to us at the party this weekend.

firstly, they have an "open" relationship...well, the younger of the two is all about the open relationship while the older one is going along with it because she fears she will lose her wife if she doesn't. secondly, the older one is all about having a baby while the younger one has verbally agreed but definitely hesitant about it, especially since she would have to carry - her partner is too old to ttc.

anyways, during the party, the younger one commented to some of the other partygoers how "exotically beautiful" my dp is and the older one spent the remainder of the party keeping her away from my dp!!!!! ok, my dp is beautiful - she is 1/2 filipino, tall, has amazing flawless olive skin and dark asian eyes - but she is in a committed relationship. not to mention we were there as a couple with our kids!

dp said "if she had tried anything i would have knocked her a$$ in the pool".

again, i don't want to offend anyone, but i don't get the open relationship thing. i definitely don't think it's a good idea to bring a child into that mix. dp said "about the time the younger one grows up about relationships is about the time they will be ready for babies".

g

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#74 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 05:28 PM
 
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Is this thread like a pot of water? Usually I'm checking all day and it seems like nothing new, then I miss a day and a bazillion posts lol.

I'm about 99.99% sure I'm not pregnant. But I'm still confused. I guess maybe since I ovulated a little late I'm still on a normal schedule? The spotting has increased. Brown/purple. But I usually have horrible cramps leading up to AF, like so bad vicodin can't touch the pain. Now I've been having less cramps than I was several days ago, but my back is still killing me. And why have I been so nauseaus? I mean I'm usually queasy a couple times a year if that, not EVERY day! I guess it's a little less the last few days but still a LOT more than usual.

I don't think I can really catch up much on personals but I'll try a couple.

Um, except that I can't quite remember who was saying what lol.

The ultrasound timing sounds right. For my IVFs I think I started on cycle day 10 and did every other day. I did the trigger on CD 13 and had the egg collection about 24 hours later. I'd say I probably could have gotten away with just CD 11 and 13, but then I knew more what to expect for mine.

That's really interesting about Femara having less multiples chance than Clomid. Isn't Femara also supposed to be less bad for the uterine lining and cervical mucus? Almost makes you wonder why they even still use clomid lol. Though personally, as long as they are all healthy we would LOVE twins or triplets, and I think the risks of more than that are pretty small even with Clomid so I'll probably give it a couple more trys at least.

Indigo that is odd about the couple that wanted to talk with you. I both agree and disagree with you and your partner. I think open relationships can be just as healthy as monogamous and wouldn't judge someone or their ability to parent just based on their monogamy choices. However that's if both partners are happy with those choices, each other, and the decision to parent. It doesn't really sound like the couple you met are in that place.

Oh oops, I meant to answer the QOTDs.

I'm pretty comfortable talking to just about anyone about any and all of the details of TTC. I have to remind myself not to tell people on completely unrelated forums (like interior design) all about my cervical mucus.

I don't think I would ever be a surrogate because I want a huge family and I don't think I'll even have time to have as many kids as I want to have. I mean I'm 32, it takes a while to incubate and I'm not going to wean super early so I figure 1 every 2 years even if we are *super* lucky, unless we like magically get twins or triplets each try lol. I've also thought a lot about donating my eggs. I'm not sure if I could do it. I couldn't now, with infertility. I couldn't give away eggs and have the other person get pregnant and not me. If I already had a bunch of kids maybe I could, like if we use DS and adopt but someday after we have a bunch of kids want to try another IVF with my husband's sperm and I could egg-share to help pay for it or something. Even then I'm not so sure though.

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#75 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 07:43 PM
 
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Hey everyone I'm new to this

My DP and I are TTC this July 2010. We have our donor coming next week for 3x this cycle. I'll be inseminating myself on the 12th\13th because my DP will be in Europe but she'll be inseminating me on the 14th.

To prepare, I am drinking natural organic fennel tea which is said to help aid conception, and I'm taking pre-natal Materna pills. We have TTC last month but I got AF, plus timing was off.

Not charting or anything, I think I'll be able to just get preggers, I'm a fertile 21 y o. I love the support of this group. I'm very frustrated with TTC, it's been my 4th try and I can't wait for the BFP. It's going to be the happiest time of my life and I enjoy reading all your posts!!!

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#76 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 10:21 PM
 
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Welcome, DykeMom! I hope you get your BFP right away and that your stay on the queer TTC threat is short and sweet. Don't be overwhelmed by the acronyms and all of that; you'll be used to it in no time! I will say that, even though you are 21 and fertile, you might consider charting: it's been the single most helpful thing I've done in TTC, and it gives so much information about timing and also about other elements of your cycle. I'd at least consider temping for a single cycle (taking your temp with a BBT every morning at the same time; lots of us use fertilityfriend online to keep track of things), or even just charting your other indicators without temping, like Bunny is doing. You can see many of our charts through the links on the first page of this thread. The other thing, if you haven't done it already, is to consider reading the Brill Lesbian Conception book. Some of us don't follow all of her suggestions, but I think most of us have benefited one way or another from that. In any case, welcome! I don't mean to sound preachy at all; as everyone here knows, I'm in the final days of my TWW, and am always looking for distractions!

Scarlett: Thanks for sharing your sperm concerns. It does sound like there's a real possibility that that batch was "off," or even just that it was for whatever reason less compatible for your body. But that doesn't mean that this last vial isn't lucky!!! I hope this next IUI is the one! It would be so great if you'd wasted time worrying about the next level of interventions! And, at the same time, it must feel good to have a solid plan in place. Your meditation sounds so lovely, I may just have to borrow your imagery!

Wehrli: Sorry that your BFF has to go, but at least you have a short work week. I can't wait to hear more about your Ren faire weekend... I know it's old hat for you guys, but it's so interesting to me!

AmandaMom: LOL about your sperm search! But seriously, I hope you get to enjoy your seriously kick a$$ social life for a bit, have an incredible wedding, and then promptly get your BFP the very next month.

Library: Welcome home! Meeting Iphegenia sounds stressful, but I think you were right to take a step back and let them sort things out. Still, it's hard not to worry... In more positive news, I'm totally impressed by your ability to hold off on testing until Thursday. At this point, I'll basically pee on anything that doesn't move. Not that that's given me any BFPs! I hope you get your (fancy digital) BFP super soon!

Escher: Safe travels! Have fun with your family. You'll be missed here!

Indigo: At least now you know! I'm glad that they weren't avoiding you because of anything about you guys. That said, I should throw out there that DP and I have always had a technically open relationship (I say technically because there have been very few, almost no, times that we've used that option). And we've been in a committed relationship for seven years now, married for two, having survived a million super big life events together. So I wouldn't let one immature couple with what sounds like real communication problems be the model for all open relationships! For us, it keeps us both aware that we're in our relationship because we chose it, every single day, and we put in plenty of work negotiating and checking in about our boundaries and comfort zones (for instance, no hitting on people in monogamous relationships, who are our mutual friends, at random pool parties that we're attending as a couple! Yikes!).

Bunny: I think we're just all back online because it's Monday. But it is refreshing after the weekend. I'm sorry that you're not feeling pregnant, but I'll hold out that 0.01% hope until AF is there for real! Just in case, do you have any plans for the next cycle?

Chiquitayy: Welcome back! I'm sorry it's been such a hard month. Your story about your new job brought up some issues that I've been thinking about a lot lately, so you've inspired me to ask a new QOTD:

QOTD: If you plan to work during/after your pregnancy, how do you think your job will take the news? What kind of environment will it be when you are pregnant and/or nursing and/or parenting? What, if any, kind of leave are you planning to take?

Phew! That got really long, so I'll answer my own QOTD later. AFM: no news. Starting to fear that my high temps are from the heat wave rather than anything in my body. I did feel a little bit nauseous this afternoon, though, right in the middle of running a reading group... FX for a BFP tomorrow or Thursday? Unless my body is incredibly cruel, I should know one way or the other by Friday...

Joyful, busy, often overwhelmed queer academic mama to an awesome toddler and:

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#77 of 486 Old 07-06-2010, 10:40 PM
 
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Just did another test and still -. WTH is going on? I'm still just spotting. I'm just scared why it wouldn't have worked. I mean I know I respond well to the meds, I know my eggs fertilize even with dead sperm lol, I was on clomid, how could at least ONE not have stuck? I'm worried there may be something else wrong but I don't really know what it could be.

My husband already has time schedule off work so I guess I'd better reserve a hotel room. It sucks also because it's a loooong boring drive, and not somewhere we'd ever choose to vacation.

I don't know if I should change anything we did, like timing or method or anything or not. I think we did everything right but there's no real way of knowing I guess.

Scarlett I thought I'd read that each sample is split up into like 3 vials, not like 20, but I don't know. I know some have better post thaw numbers than others.

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#78 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 11:14 AM
 
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QOTD - I work in a nursing home. There's something in the water, there are minimally 4 girls pregnant at any given moment. The attitude won't be problematic so much as the actual environment. When someone gets shingles, pregos don't enter the room, for example. No one nurses. Well, there was 1 girl who did and 3 who tried. Out of maybe 15 or 20 babies who have been born while I was there? I have short term disability insurance, they will pay for 4 weeks off for a vaginal birth. I'm planning to take 12, since that's what I am legally allowed and still guaranteed the same position. Big however is, I am thinking about opening a home daycare. LOL. So if I don't get around to it before I take maternity, that will be when I make the transition.

DykeMom-I second Beastie, Charting is good. When I was 21 and 24, I got pregnant every time I timed it right, and, well, the only way to know if I timed it right is by charting. Charting isn't as scary as it seems. I just took my temperature every morning and peed on sticks for a couple of days in the middle.

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#79 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 11:21 AM
 
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Beastie Boo to the BFN this morning. Even though you got your positive at 12dpo last time, you may need another day or two this time. Your temps are still looking great! You must be really miserable... s

Bunny s for you, too. I'm sorry that AF showed up after so many weird days of spotting. What a confusing cycle! I hate to say it, but it may not have worked simply because even when you do everything right, the majority of the time, it just doesn't take. For all the science, it is still a pretty mysterious process. Maybe the egg or sperm in question weren't quite right, or perhaps something went awry in early cell division. There is a lot of luck involved. Hang in there. It *willl* happen for you!

Gelly More s! Blah for the BFN. But as long as AF stays away, there is still a chance, right?

Library ARE YOU TESTING THIS MORNING? Your chart looks perfectly triphasic, and we need a BFP around here! Go team! I'm so so hopeful for you.

QOTD As for maternity leave, my employer technically doesn't have much, but I can spread out my sick days and 2 weeks of disability leave. I also have two fantastically supportive bosses/chairs (since I'm cross-appointed in two departments) and am reasonably certain that I'll be able to teach only one of my usual two courses without taking a pay hit. So if I get preggo this cycle, I'll be due in mid-March, and I'd teach only one class next spring, which only meets once/week. So it would be pretty sweet. If I get preggo next month, I'd be due so close to the end of the semester that I'd probably try to wing it, teaching both classes in the spring and using the sick leave for the fall, so that I'd only have one class (2-3 days/week, though) while the babe is little. The perfect timing would be September conception for an early May birth; that keeps me going when I feel like this is taking forever. The perfect timing is still two cycles away!

I had my post-O ultrasound today. Surprise, surprise, I did ovulate! There was a very floppy follicle on the right side, where the mature follicle was last week. The annoying thing is that I'm now supposed to have my consult with the RE, but his first appointment was on the 27th! So the NP will look at my chart and make recommendations for next time if this one doesn't work out. The other bad news is that the nurse had never heard of Femara (the follicle stimulating drug that 2HappyMamas suggested produces fewer multiples than Clomid). They use Follistim. Anyone know anything about that? Sigh.

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#80 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 11:47 AM
 
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Hey ladies~

Miserable morning. My temp plummeted to 97.17 and even though I haven't tested I feel for sure this means it's over. I stayed in bed for hours this morning because I was too sad to make myself wake up and get going. I mean, it was a chilly night and I guess it could still be positive, but I have zero hopes now. I'll test tomorrow, at 14 dpo, but I'll bet you a nickel it's a negative. WTF? My chart just looked magical, like I was really doing something right this time, but of course it's nothing we can DO, eh? I felt like I was too early at the outset and I'll bet it turns out I'm right. So I'm completely sad and discouraged today, without even peeing on anything.

Dykemom~ Welcome! I'm going to second or third the idea of charting. It's easy and actually very interesting to see your body work. I think it's especially beneficial for lezzies like us who don't usually have constant, on-demand access to fresh swimmers.

Beastie~ sorry you're not getting the indicators you want. Did you test today? Any news?

Bunny~ UGH!!! The negs are so horrible, and spotting makes it worse. After my low temp this morning I went to the bathroom fully expecting to see AF, but nothing. Nothing but the progesterone, which should hold it off for a few more days. I hope you get the best news soon xoxo

AmandaH~ Thanks for your encouragement. I so want to give the team a BFP. I wish I knew something about Follistim that I could tell you, but I've always been a Femara gal.

QOTD~ I work in an elementary school and it'll be no problem for me to get the time away. I think this school, this group of ladies (and we are all ladies except for the PE teacher) would be excited and supportive. I'm out to them, so I know there would be a million curious questions about how we did it, but that would be fine too. If this cycle works, the kiddo would be due in March, which would be perfect. I could take March, April, May for maternity leave and then have June July and August as bonus maternity leave. It's yet another reason I was hoping for a BFP this time around, though now my hopes are pretty much dashed.

DP is at work this morning and I haven't even told her the news. Ugh ugh ugh.

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#81 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 12:51 PM
 
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woohoo!! it's my 1000th post! do i get a prize or something? lol!!

i'm encouraged that there are mature adults in open relationships on this board. however, i fear that this couple is not one of them. further information that came to light late yesterday indicates the younger one was talking serious smack about what she would do with/to my dp given the opportunity. i will just hope we never run into them again.

follistim is an injectible fertility medication which is more potent than clomid and femara. i think there is a way bigger chance of multiples using that than clomid - depending on what the regime is of course.

llbrarylady, sorry about the temp drop. i hope it pops back up again tomorrow along with a bfp.

qotd - my co-workers were all very supportive. i took 6 weeks "short term disability" plus 2 weeks vacation. coming back to work was easy because ds1 went (still does) to my company daycare. dp took 12 weeks off at 1/2 pay and ds2 also goes to my company daycare.

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#82 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 01:23 PM
 
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Indigo~ I'm sure there are people in healthy open relationships, but I'd also wager that most of those are men. I don't seen how women could do it, or would necessarily want to. That might make me narrow minded but it's just my thoughts. I'm glad you managed to escape those gals and I too hope they don't incur your wrath in the future! Your DP does sound lovely, too, it's true, but they'll just have to content themselves with an eyefull.

Thanks for your encouragement. I don't see how I could come back from this, but I guess anything's possible. Well, not anything. I guess this is just the latest example of the progesterone effing with me.

Congrats on 1,000 posts. If I knew how to do emoticons, I'd find something celebratory.

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#83 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 01:27 PM
 
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Curses! I was just finishing one of my epic posts, and MDC shut down and lost the whole thing.

Now I'm too irritated to recreate the whole thing, so I'll be back with QOTD and more personals later. In brief, though:

Indigo: Hooray for your 1,000th post! Thanks for haring it with us! i made you an awesome little smiley parade in celebration, but it's gone... Still, for you!

Library: It's not over till it's over, really. In my preggo cycle I had several big dips, and turned out that I got that BFP anyway. So maybe hold out hope?

Gelly: Fingers still crossed for you... how do you feel?

Bunny: Sorry about AF. I agree with AHope, though, that it probably isn't anything you could have controlled, just luck of the draw. Don't they say that, even under the very best conditions, there's only a 20% chance of conception? And, sadly, none of us gets to have the "very best conditions." I hope this next try is the one for you!

AHope: Congrats on confirming your low-stress right-on-schedule O. I hope you get your BFP before you even make it to your RE appointment. That'll show them!

AFM: Another BFP this morning, but I'm still feeling fairly optimistic based on my temps, nausea, and the fact that my last BFP wasn't actually until 12DPO at night. So I'm holding out hope for a few more days. I think the hardest part if I get a BFN in the end will be that I do feel[ so pregnant, and it will be harder down the road to trust that instinct if it turns out not to be the case...

Ok, the rest of my last post can't be saved. I think I'll take it as a sign that it's time to leave my sweltering office for the cool of a car ride to work from home.

Joyful, busy, often overwhelmed queer academic mama to an awesome toddler and:

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#84 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 03:37 PM
 
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Squeel!!!! Ok, well, even though I have had not even a hint of a +OPK, and it's only cycle day 10, my Saliva test says peak fertility is tomorrow & Friday, SO we did a cervix check today and !VOILA! we are looking fertile folks! I wouldn't have guessed in a million years this early in my cycle (which is probably why for awhile last year I thought I wasnt ovulating) but the sperm will be here tomorrow, so as long as I don't get an ovulation confirmation on my vag sensor tonight we are in business! Gonna have another looksy tomorrow to decide between tomorrow night and Friday. :fingerscrossed !!!

BTW First post from my iPhone = surprisingly easy

Taking a break for a bit to attempt to salvage my sanity. wool.gif
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#85 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 04:05 PM
 
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Congrats on the fertile signs Scarlett! I hope your timing ends up perfect

AmandaHope I used Follistim for my IVFs. It's an injectible (FYI if you do end up taking it, the shots really didn't hurt much at all). I was on...225mg if I remember right? Part of the "High responder" protocol, which they say means they give you a low dosage thinking you'll respond very well to the meds. And indeed I did, with 31 follicles the first time and more than that the second time. I felt like I needed to cart my ovaries around in a wheelbarrow lol. Granted they could have you at a much lower dosage, but I would want to do some serious research before agreeing to injectibles for an IUI cycle. I'd also feel pretty freaked out that the nurse hadn't hurt of Femara since it's probably one of the most commonly prescribed fertility drugs.

QODT - I'm a housewife now, so I don't have to go back to "work" after pregnancy, I can just finally do the job I've been preparing for my whole life!

AFM - well, obviously AF is here full force. Thank god, cause I couldn't have dealt with that tease much longer. My husband has the time off work, I just have to reserve a hotel. And figure out what we're going to do in that boring town. I wonder if we're too fat to horseback ride?

I called my regular doctor and I just LOVE the office manage there. She always remembers me and she was really supportive about it not working. I told her my thinking (about responding well to meds and my eggs fertilizing even with dead sperm) and that of course I'm not a doctor but I'm just worried I may have something causing implantation failure. She agreed with me it seems logical and she'll talk to the doctor about it. She's also going to ask him to order a full hormonal panel since I haven't had that done in 4 years. Now I just have to figure out what cycle day and home Clomid doesn't throw it off.

And I was shocked that I was actually able to get an appointment with a doctor I've heard a lot about who is supposed to be very good at hormones and helping with infertility issues! But she's not an RE so my insurance should cover her I think (I insisted that I want to be seen for Hashimotos and painful periods and I know insurance will cover that). So I could have gotten an appointment as soon as two weeks from now, but that's when we'll be out of town so it's on the 28th. I guess they do IUIs there so in case I end up needing that I guess that's good news too.

I guess I'm a little worried since I have to send over all my records that some of my other doctors may have mentioned how psycho I am lol. I wish I could just have them send the test results without any other info.

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#86 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 04:08 PM
 
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I'm back from vacation, well rested and ready to get back to business. I am eagerly awaiting AF so I can try again. It will be my first cycle on medication and I am ready! Good to see everyone is doing well.

Coco- Congratulations on the twins! That is wonderful news!

TTC#1 since Sept, 2009; in heartbeat.gif w DP, + two young dogs. Started adoption process May 2011. adoptionheart-1.gif  Baby boy born on June 18, 2013 and placed with us.babyboy.gif

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#87 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 04:37 PM
 
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Bunny-- YOU have a right to your medical record, and you always have the option of picking it yourself, looking it over, and then presenting all or parts of it to your new doc yourself. We have patients do it all the time. I'm hoping that it was just a fluke and everything is perfect in your insides & just waiting on that perfect egg.

Taking a break for a bit to attempt to salvage my sanity. wool.gif
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#88 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 05:21 PM
 
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Wow, I'm terrible at keeping up here!

Beastie Sorry you keep getting BFNs, but it truly is too early! And your chart does look good. Good luck!

escher Good luck with the new sperm!! We're on try #7 with our KD, our last shot with his goods, and my NP said that she does have a belief that some sperm and some eggs were just never destined to meet successfully. (We're insemming this week or next, so I'm hoping that's not OUR case... but I do think there's something to it!)

AmandaHope Yes, we will take the baby if we need to. If the baby gets taken away from her, they will go to family first, and we are both willing and ready if it heads our way. It is so hard to be supportive to HER when we've given her so much support already and she's taken advantage of it left and right. The whole situation just sucks.

BunnyLullabye Sorry about your BFN.

gellybean Sorry about your DW's aunt! And your crazy vacation! Man, when it rains, it pours, huh? Are you still at BFN or has AF arrived? I hope you're still waiting and your BFP is right around the corner.

COCO Congrats on the twins! Amazing!!

MissScarlett May the LH force be with you.

Thanks for all of the kind words about my sister. I've moved past the anger and sadness, and now I'm just afraid for the baby. We're prepared to take the baby if the county comes calling. I think the best thing that can happen is if she gives it up for adoption or the county takes it away from her until she can care for it. It's been a really crappy few years dealing with her, I don't know why I'm surprised this is happening. Oy.

Babymaking update: After being on fairly aggressive meds last month and only producing one follicle, my doc upped my meds considerably this month. This is our last month with our preferred donor, so we wanted to go all out trying to make a baby. We went yesterday for our CD11 u/s and there were 6 dominant follicles, measuring 12-13 each. He was aiming for 4-5. He initially wanted to lower the dosage, but I expressed concern that it would go down to only 1 follicle. He has discussed selective reduction with us (and I know this is a controversial topic), and we are okay with it. It's not ideal, I pray it's not something we have to worry about, but we want a baby, ideally with this donor (who is DW's brother, who lives in Europe and is not accessible for more sperm). When I expressed concern about only 1 or 2 follicles, he decided to keep the meds as is. So if things go according to plan, we'll have 5-6 follicles come insemination time. Truthfully, the chance of more than 2 sticking is so slim... I would hate to be conservative and only end up with 1 or 2 follicles. He also only gets about 1 set of quads a year, and that's the most he's had. We've also already spent about $3k on this cycle alone - why slow down now? Because I have so many, he's treating this cycle like an IVF, without the egg extraction. This just means more drugs, and IVF grade progesterone post insemination. It'll be a shot as opposed to a suppository. He's having me do a shot of something to prevent me from prematurely ovulating on Thursday night. We do an u/s on Friday, hopefully a Lupron trigger Saturday night, insem on Monday morning, and HCG shot Monday night (I don't really understand why, but this is standard IVF stuff apparently). I hope to GOD this works. It's financially and emotionally draining, and the bravelle shots are starting to HURT. I'm putting it out into the universe that I want to be pregnant with not more than two babies.

QOTD - Peaceful time: Usually, right after AF leaves is pretty peaceful, and 2 days after IUI-8 days after IUI is also peaceful. The rest of the time is NUTS.

QOTD - Surrogacy I don't know if I could do it. Maybe for my other sister (NOT THE DRUG ADDICT), but I don't know. It would be difficult. I'm also so attached to the baby I haven't conceived yet... hmm.

I hope all of you TWW'ers are knocked up!!

Partner (35) and I (32) have been together since 2004, TTC #1 since 9/09 - 7 failed IUIs with KD

12/17/10: First round IVF w/ WTBK donor results in pos.gif ; 2/13/11 M/C after emergency surgery angel.gif  

Try #9 FET 4/11 - Negative.  Try #10: IVF 6/11 - Negative.  Next up: Try #11 FET 8/11

 

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#89 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 07:29 PM
 
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I'm so sorry I've been Posty McPosterson today, but it's my "panic day". I'm having all sorts of twingy crampy ovulatey feelings in my little tummy today and PRAYING the egg will hold off till the swimmers get here tomorrow. Like I said, I've never O'd anywhere CLOSE to CD 10 before, some I'm hoping it's a mixture of my head, my nerves, and my late sushi dinner last night.

Please cooperate universe, my patience is thin.

Taking a break for a bit to attempt to salvage my sanity. wool.gif
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#90 of 486 Old 07-07-2010, 08:40 PM
 
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Scarlett~ I hear you! Panic indeed. My fingers are crossed that the egg hangs on until you need it the most. I hope it all goes well for you. CD 10 seems really odd! But we do what our body tells us, eh?

I've done nothing but cry all day. I bought HPTs at the store but I kinda don't even want to pee on them just to see them mocking me. I'm feeling pre-period and know it's going to be time to flush another $500 down the toilet. It's really breaking my heart this time.

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