January Queer Conceptions - Page 7 - Mothering Forums

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Old 01-11-2011, 08:18 PM
 
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Originally Posted by prettyisa View Post


Gracie—that sounds awful! Maybe you should invest in your own and just bring it with you (ha!)
 


 

that sounds like a plan last time I just took a bunch of pain killers ! I think I'm taking something for the insems but not sure what maybe Ill just chug some vicodin : )

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Old 01-12-2011, 09:14 AM
 
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Hey ladies~ I posted a big long post from the Denver airport yesterday, but it looks like the internets ate it, dang it!!  I'll try and remember what I said, but if I forget anyone, forgive me!

 

 

Starling~ You're more cavalier than I, keeping your comix in the loo. I'd not be brave enough (or maybe I just don't trust Rufus, the paper-chewing cat). I"m glad you keep your best books in a safer spot. Getting VERY EXCITED to hear the prospects for your IVF!!!

 

Isa~ Yay for your preferred donor!!!!  I'm so glad he 'came through' for you.  And yeah, Neil Gaiman is dreamy in that rumpeldy-frumpeldy brilliant sort of way.  Nancy Pearl kept trying to interject questions and observations, but he just kept going on and on. I could have listened to him for hours!!

 

AHope~ I love the fruit and veggie baby-size equivalents too! My kiddo's apparently the size of an eggplant.

 

2ez~ I have no info on your QOTD, but I hope your dad's okay, and that whomever stole your ipad gets scabies. Jerks.

 

Escher~ How's it going?  3dpo, have you tested yetwinky.gif

 

AMom~ WELCOME BACK!!! We've missed you for sure!! Your wedding sounds wonderful, congratulations!  I'm sorry about the monstrously painful and inconclusive HSG, that would be terrible to suffer and then be disappointed. I hope the clomid gives you the twins you're hoping for, and I look forward to being with you on this journey. AMANDA POWER!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

Indigo~ UGH!  That sounds like a really unpleasant situation, but I'm glad you're going to have the confrontation. Not even teachers' kids should be allowed to get away with that. I hope your talk with DS did the trick. 

 

Max~ EEEEEE!! So excited about the IVF action! You'll be in the wait before you know it! And yes, isn't it funny the cycles when we're excited to see AF!

 

 

AFM~ FINALLY HOME!!!  After getting up at 3:30 yesterday morning and flying all day, with massive travel delays from Denver to OKC, we arrived to the 15 degree weather and a blocked bathtub drain, but I don't even care. I'm just so happy that I lived through the flights and am home and reunited with my DP and all the pets.  Her medals from the Disney  races are wonderfully impressive.  Actually, while stranded in Denver, I saw the cutest li'l baby butch wearing her medal from the Mickey Marathon and congratulated her on it and told her my girlfriend had run the Goofy challenge. She seemed pleased to be congratulated and a bit taken aback that a stranger would just come out like that. I hope I was a good role model ;) 

 


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Old 01-12-2011, 09:14 AM
 
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Indigo - I hope you are able to get the problem at your child's preschool resolved. Kids are so impressionable at that age; the last thing you need is a negative influence.

 

Max - I'm sorry to see you're still TTC, but I'm certain IVF will do the trick for you. thumb.gif Enjoy your AF, Max, because this will be the last one for a long time!

 

escher - I just know I came back to bring you luck for this TWW. We're the last two Amandas left on the thread! It's time we join AmandaHope and Library Lady on the Q&P thread. You first. fingersx.gif

 

2ez - I take it you're not from Memphis? We got about 7 inches here, and the schools are closed for the third day in a row. I grew up in Michigan, and we'd be lucky to get one day off for 7 inches of snow!

 

Isa - Thanks for managing the thread. Hopefully it brings you luck! dust.gif Here is a link to my chart for any chart stalkers out there.

 

AFM, tonight will be my last dose of clomid. I'm taking 100mg at bedtime from CD3-CD7. The side effects haven't been too bad. I'm a little warmer at night and a little weepier during the day, but it's not awful. I was worried it would keep me up at night or bring on my migraines, and DP thought I would turn into an emotional monster. Thankfully, none of that has happened. Yet.

 

ETA so what's the deal with the smiley codes not working?  C'mon you old timers, you know what I'm talking about.  I type :dust or :fingersx and get nothing. Do I really have to click on the smiley menu and find the one I'm looking for now? :eyesroll


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Old 01-12-2011, 10:23 AM
 
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I know this question has been asked before...but I don't remember any of the answers. For those of you that are doing at-home insemination (I know it is only a few...), how many vials do you get at a time? Last cycle we tried, we bought 2 vials--but also used fresh for two additional insems. This time around, we are trying to decide whether or not to get 2 or 3 (we have decided not to do the fresh this time around...)

I also called Midwest on Monday and found out that all 3 of our top donors are uncertain at this point. greensad.gif I have decided that if we can't get any of them, we will probably hold off for this cycle. I am supposed to call again on Friday to check...the unknowing so close to insem time makes me nervous!

M (30), D (30)  TTC #1 since October 2010. 13 unsuccessful cycles--no meds (2 m/c). First medicated IUI July 2012: BFN. Second medicated IUI: BFP! Triplets! bigeyes.gif Actual Due Date: May 17...GOAL: April 5th!

 

Sawyer, Elliott, and Miles arrived on March 24th @ 32 weeks & 2 days.

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Old 01-12-2011, 10:28 AM
 
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AmandaMom--I was having the same issue. Try this:
Quote:
Originally Posted by wehrli View Post

lisedea, to have your smilies automatically turn into smilies go to My Profile (at top of page), Edit Accout Details, then at the bottom of that page under Preferred Editor Type choose BB Code Editor. HTH!


M (30), D (30)  TTC #1 since October 2010. 13 unsuccessful cycles--no meds (2 m/c). First medicated IUI July 2012: BFN. Second medicated IUI: BFP! Triplets! bigeyes.gif Actual Due Date: May 17...GOAL: April 5th!

 

Sawyer, Elliott, and Miles arrived on March 24th @ 32 weeks & 2 days.

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Old 01-12-2011, 11:22 AM
 
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Howdy, I have been checking in to read but not had much to contribute.

 

Lisedea, Both my kids were conceived with double insems (frozen for him then fresh for her).  I did double, single, double so far.  I'm doing double in Feb and tripple in March if I have to.  One of the things I really like about my current bank is that I can see how many vials each guy has.  With Osha I insemed with my 4th choice donor two cycles before I got first choice (and my boy).  This time around I can go, "hey, he has 12 vials, I'm going to order."

 

AmandaMom, glad to see you back!  Hope your clomid plan pans out!

 

Library, your confrence sounds like fun, at least.

 

Max you shooting yourself up yet?

 

Starling, where else would anyone keep their comics?  You doing well in your cycle?

 

Graceie, hills are good!  I moved to a flat city once and couldn't take it.  But man do I miss public transportation!

 

Not a lot going on over here.  I'm doing a terrible job of charting because I'm working night shift more than days.  Had an interview at a home health agency yesterday.  Need to go buy some LH tests soon.  I'm on CD 11, so I should be ok for a few more days.  We have snow over my boots, so 5 inches?  We're going sledding today! (sorry starling, no helmets, but really, our hill isn't that exciting.  We might need helmets if we get in the car, tho).


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Old 01-12-2011, 01:46 PM
 
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I will read through and do personals in a bit but have a Q for now AF started yesterday we are doing insems this cycle so when should I start with the OPKs ?

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Old 01-12-2011, 02:30 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Library—I love that you just walked up and outed yourself to the poor thing! She probably thought you were going to ask for directions to the nearest babygap or something.

Actually, here’s a QOTD for those of you who are/have been pregnant: how does it change the way people read you? Does everyone assume you’re straight? And (for all of us) do you plan to do anything to make your queerness more obvious while you’re preggo, or does it not matter?

Lise—that sucks. I think that she’s doing a lot of tests on the donors this week, which is screwing up their release schedule. After we get past our favorite we’ve got a #2 in mind, but honestly none of them seem any better or worse than the others after that point so I think that we’d just choose one on a whim and go for it.

Seraf—I wish we had hills! We have tons of snow here, but nothing to do with it. Except making angels, I guess, but that’s not the same.

Gracie—I start the OPKs about 4 days before FF tells me it thinks I’m going to O. So I did one last night expecting that I’ll actually O on Saturday. If your cycle’s really irregular, though, you might want to test early and often just to make sure you don’t miss it!

She's here!
And so are the boys!
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Old 01-12-2011, 02:32 PM
 
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having crobank issues and freaking out sense its only 14 days a week or less . I need to update my adress with them and its more complicated a prossess then I thought I need to send a crap ton of forms in like two days ago and I thought I sent in the depost but I havent and my printers broken so I cant print the stupid forms . I not trilled about paying 500 just for the stufff to get pregnate so that its so much freken work just to get some sprem is pissing me off

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Old 01-12-2011, 02:40 PM
 
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Hi Everyone,

AmandaMom: Hooray! You're back! orngbiggrin.gif I'm glad that your wedding and honeymoon went well. What fun! I'm sorry your hsg was so painful. That sounds horrible! I'm glad that the clomid hasn't been too awful. I second Lisedea's suggestion that you change to BB code editor so that you can type in code for smilies. And I agree that it is time that you and I get pregnant so we can take the whole Amanda team over to Q&P!

Graceie: Sperm banks can be such a pain to deal with. hug.gif Have you used opks before? How long are your cycles typically? Without that information, I would probably recommend starting around CD 8. But if you have long or short cycles or experience with opks there may be a better answer. Speculums work ok for me for paps and IUIs. They hurt a bit going in, but it isn't horrible. But I think when I do it myself I don't want it to hurt at all, so then I can't make it work. I don't know.

Seraf: How did the interview go? How would that job be different than your current job? I hope sledding was fun!

Lisedea: How stressful not to know what donor you'll use! I hope that someone great is available on Friday! fingersx.gif

Library: Hooray for being home! orngbiggrin.gif

2ez: I'm sorry you're feeling so discouraged right now. That's a hard place to be. hug.gif I hope that something wonderful happens for you very soon.

Isa: If I am ever put in charge of the weather, I will make sure to order up lots of balmy weather for you. I don't know that I'll do anything differently to assert my queerness when I'm pregnant. Probably I'll just continue to mention my wife whenever possible.

Max: Hooray for spotting! You're finally at your IVF cycle!!! What did you decide about the u/s today?

Indigo: What a hard situation. I agree that it sounds like it is time to have a chat with the daycare director. I hope that they are able to figure out something to do to help. hug.gif

AFM: 3dpo. I was looking at my charts today, and it was interesting to me to see that the only time I've gotten pregnant (not counting that maybe chemical in October, which I don't count but my wife does count) was when I insemmed shortly BEFORE I got a positive opk. Every other cycle I've insemmed after I got a positive opk. It was also the only cycle that I did three IUIs, but my RE is fairly opposed to me doing that again. So maybe if this cycle doesn't work I need to try to do even earlier insems. It's so hard to time them that way (since I then have to schedule them before I have a positive opk or a soft cervix), but maybe it is doable. Anyway, I guess that is something to try if this cycle doesn't work. But I'm still hoping that this cycle will just work even without nice early timing. I have a beta scheduled for 1/23, so we'll know then if not before! fingersx.gif

 

 


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Old 01-12-2011, 03:06 PM
 
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joy.gif I went to the RE today for my baseline u/s, she could tell I came in early and said, "you still have some more bleeding to do". But she also said I was ready to start my cycle. They did blood-work and I should hear back soon, if all my hormones are ok then I am ready to start the injectables! I have physical therapy on my foot in a few hours, then DP and I may go out and celebrate. We are both so happy!

 


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Old 01-12-2011, 04:21 PM
 
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Congrats Max! That is so very exciting! Isn't it great that news like that can completely change your entire day (or week! smile.gif ) for the better?

Escher--that is interesting. I guess that is why charting is so important--it catches the strange little things about our bodies.

Graceie--I know it is frustrating...I did all of that stuff a few months before I began trying...and glad that I did because it is a process! The tricky part for me was having to schedule a meeting with my NP to convince her to sign the paperwork--even though she wasn't going to be in any way involved. (I, in the end, didn't have to do any convincing...she was totally cool with it all....) As for testing, I normally start 10 days into my cycle--but 8 days would be a safe place to start since you don't have any idea when your surge will be (as earlier suggested). It definitely varies from person to person.

Isa--I guess my donor was supposed to be tested last week but "something happened" (words from the receptionist...caused me to make up stories in my mind of all the things that could have happened! smile.gif) We are really not very picky either...we are mostly choosing on sperm count (ones that work best using IUI for ICI)...and family health....so, I guess we will see what news Friday brings to make our decision!

Seraf--Thanks for the info. We are just trying to decide right now if doing a triple will really increase our chances or not...especially since I am uncertain if my cycle will be screwed up....I guess we have two days to decide!

QOTD--I actually have never thought about this. When we get pregnant, it will probably be a big deal on the island....in fact, it will interesting to see how the kids at school react! I think off island (to people that do not know us), we will act normal--not make it any more obvious than what it will be. Actually, when I was pregnant earlier, we went into Motherhood Maternity to look at pants (a little early...but with little chances to go into big stores like that, we jump at it whenever we can! smile.gif) the woman behind the counter didn't bat an eye at the two of us (in west Michigan!!). It was quite refreshing.

M (30), D (30)  TTC #1 since October 2010. 13 unsuccessful cycles--no meds (2 m/c). First medicated IUI July 2012: BFN. Second medicated IUI: BFP! Triplets! bigeyes.gif Actual Due Date: May 17...GOAL: April 5th!

 

Sawyer, Elliott, and Miles arrived on March 24th @ 32 weeks & 2 days.

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Old 01-12-2011, 04:24 PM
 
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w&h:  congrats!

 

max:  do you feel like your (forced) break was good for you?  sounds fun to have a celebration with your dp.

 

starling:  yes, dp and i will surely dtd before insemming (and probably immediately after)!!  we haven't had a sexy try yet since we had been driving 2 hours to the re clinic each time.  we'll use two vials, 12 or so hours apart.  once the first is in me my dp won't come anywhere near me with her pants off, so we'll see how much action i get the second time around.   i'm trying to remember whether she slept in double pajama pants after our first iui...i think she did.  hoping everything lines up well for your transfer.

 

lisedea:  i'm going to be inseminating at home for the first time soon, and i'm planning to use 2 vials of frozen sperm.  i imagine three is even better--but it would be stressful for me to spend the extra $ and have added pressure for the cycle to *work*.  also, i think i know the timing i'll try using two, and i'm not sure how i'd approach three or more.  this way, i'll do the first when my opk is not quite positive (this usually aligns with other signs of fertility for me) and then a second 12 or 16 or 18 hours later, depending on time of day and my schedule.  

 

escher:  i'm planning to do an insemination before a positive opk for the first time.  was it accidental the time you insemmed that early, or is that your preferred timing?  i'm hoping your timing this month was just what your body needed...happy 3dpo.  and, i'm not a speculum expert yet...just an expert speculum-orderer!  i'll likely start using mine tomorrow--and if i find a comfortable trick i'll let you know.

 

prettyisa:  i like your qotd.  i live in a small hippie city 2 hours south of pdx, and i think how folks will read me as a pregnant woman depends on how much of my pregnancy is spent here and at what point we move back to portland.  in this town, i'm often assumed to be straight by strangers, but also since it's a fairly small place, my dp and i are a recognizable couple about town.  in pdx, there are queer parents of all shapes and sizes everywhere...so perhaps more folks can imagine someone with a big belly and long hair might be queer.  

 

library:  i'm happy you made it home safely.  i'm recently 30 and my dp is 29, and we're starting to have interactions where we feel like the "queer elders."  i can't wait to be a pregnant queer elder and talk to baby dykes in train stations across the land. 

 

there are a lot of us on here right now.  i always miss people.  wave.gif

 

afm:  we decided yesterday we'd give this cycle a try.  i ordered sperm today--and it is scheduled to arrive late next week.  come on october baby! 


 

 

 

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Old 01-12-2011, 04:45 PM
 
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thanks ladies Im ok I am already regestered but forgot to update my adress post move Im hopeing Ill get it sorted my printers broken is my big issue heading to the printing faxing place during " work " and sending it off fingers crosses they will have it in time for me to place an order friday , Ive Od between day 14 and day 17 last three monthes Im requesting the sperm for the 24th day 13 so it will be here Ill start opks on the 23 sense its really dosent matter if i O before then

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Old 01-12-2011, 06:05 PM
 
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First beta is in...18.  But, it is 14 dpo and the BFPs have gotten progressively darker so I'm trying not to worry!  DW went to bed at 7:30p and is feeling like crud (that and the sudden jump in cup size are pretty reassuring!).  Major drawback tho' in our timing-- baby starting solids + new pregnancy = poopy diapers that make her want to hurl, LOL!  Here's hoping bean keeps sticking!  


  Two moms and two boys enjoying the truth that love always wins!!!  joy.gifjoy.gifpartners.gif
 

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Old 01-12-2011, 06:13 PM
 
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Library, I feel like an old queer, you must feel....  I don't even know!

 

QOTD- I think I've talked about it a lot on this board, but I felt invisible (in the queer community) last times I was pregnant.  I had the random desire to grow my hair out both pregnancies, and then shaved my head in the last month when the assumptions made me crazy.  I lived in actual cities when I was pregnant before (SF and Columbus).  I was read as straight.  One day I had the strange experience of men crossing the street to flirt with me multiple times in one day.  Wearing a big, bulky coat, nothing remotely attractive.  I was interested in expressing my identity, but nervous about violence (my mom works in a prison, I wasn't allowed to come out until after high school because she was worried that we live in a redneck area.  I think that poor boy in Wyoming was killed about 3 weeks after I came out to my mom, yeah, that didn't help.)  I'm pretty vocal about being queer because the kids get me guessed to be straight still all the time.  I was single before Sara came along, so I was especially interested in being identifiable for a while.  LOL.  I guess it's just the area, Sara is sitting here saying no one believes she's queer.  She said she has to tell people she's "really really gay."  Not just a little bit gay.  It can't help that the few queers around here still refer to their partners as "my friend."

 

Isa, snow forts and snow divas are fun without hills.

 

Graceie, so frustrating!  Things are just supposed to go smoothly, right?  I am proud you can even read your fertility signs now.  I was irregular for more than a year after Osha's birth and 2 years after Ari.

 

Escher, I work in a nursing home now.  Home health would be a major change.  It's interesting that you got pregnant before the positive LH.  What inspired your to insem so early?

 

Lisedea, Your last cycle was good, yeah?  You showed ovulation signs?  I got Osha from a cycle right after an early loss.

 

Max, big yays!  So, you're kinda sorta 1 day pregnant?

 

Rainbow, woo hoo, it's always more fun to insem than to skip!

 

Sledding was good fun.  Lots of other kids were there and a good time was had by all.  Before we left, however, Ari was all dressed up and fell partway down the stairs.  I am so cold and insensitive, I asked if she was ok (she was) and I took a picture before I helped her up.  Will have to post it once I get it loaded to the computer.


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Old 01-12-2011, 06:56 PM
 
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Library you re Awesome !

 

Ladies did you know female ferret have to breed every time they go into heat or they get sick/crazy and likely die ? anyone else feel like that ? they also only ovulate after they mate which seems unfair . maybe I should change my signature to " crazy lady ferret "

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Old 01-12-2011, 08:10 PM
 
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Hello everyone!

 

Gracie~ Good luck catching that egg!

 

Wishin & Hopin~ Congrats...stick little bean stick...sticky.gif.

 

Snow days~ I can't remember who all commented on them...I grew up in Arkansas...2-4 inches would shut down everything...no school for days. I now love 90 miles sw of Chicago...and 2-4 inches is like a light frost...nothing stops. I think we got 6 inches yesterday and nothing stopped...I think that we would have to get a few feet before they would give us a snow day in this area. I sooooo miss the snow days...cold.gif

 

 

Max~ Yeah! it's almost time for IVF. I am soooo excited for you! Glad to hear that your leg is feeling better and that you are ready to jump back on this ttc train.

 

Library~ your conferance sounded like fun. Tell your DP congrats on running a half marathon and then a full marathon! Wow. Hope that you are able to get a little rest this weekend from all your travels.

 

lisedea~ Good luck on catching that egg! I have done 3 insems per cycle...one when the opk is a bit dark but I haven't yet gotten a smilie opk, then one 12 hrs after a smilie opk, ant then 12-18 hrs later depending on how open my cervix looks and how my cm is looking. But don't go by my timing...I haven't managed to catch the egg yet. Just saying that a 3fer is doable.

 

escher~ Yeah for great insems...much baby dust to you... dust.gif

 

AmandaMom~ Welcome Back!  I hope that clomid does the trick for you! When are you going to insem? or did you already insem?

 

QOTD~ I don't know what will happen once we are pregnant. My DW is very vocal out and open...me not so much. I don't necesarily feel that I have to come out to everyone I meet. My DW has lived here (in this town) her whole life and everyone know that she is queer. From what I understand, we were the first gay couple to have a huge wedding and reception, with our pic in the paper and everything, in this area. I kinda enjoy having some privacy and I don't care if people know that I'm queer or not, its enough for me to know. Just FYI...I'm a 4 on the enneagram...ie there is so much about me that is unique being queer is just part of who I am.

 

AFM~ I thought that 2011 would be my year...well so far I have had pnemonia, my insurance company is still jerking me around, and I hit a coyote driving home $3,500 worth of damage, and it's only the 12 day of the new year. Seriously...srsly? I mean what did I do? banghead.gif      I am okay, I was not hurt in the accident...I have insurance the car will be fixed. I am feeling much better from the pnemonia, and I  guess I will get my yeah or nay from my insurance company re: infertility treatment. I'm doing well...I have a rental...a huge ram truck, which DW is loving driving...I need a ladder to get up in this thing. Anyway...we decided to sit out this cycle...we are hoping to get back in the game in February.

 

 

 

     


Lela (39) & Irene (54) TCC  #1 stillheart.gif ! Mom to furbabies Bruzier (Chorkie), Diesel (Min-Pin), and Giovanni (Chihuahua).dog2.gif

 

Multiple ICI's, and IUI's...2009-2011....BFN's

1st IVF August 2011....BFN

1st FET March 2012....BFN

2nd IVF July/August 2012....

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Old 01-12-2011, 08:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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man, my computer is HATING me tonight!

She's here!
And so are the boys!
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Old 01-12-2011, 08:37 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Escher—why is your RE against doing the third vial? I keep wondering if we should try that, but the money puts me off.

Max—so happy to hear that the injectibles are in your future!

LIse—the possibilities are endless! The first one that comes to mind is flying monkeys keeping him from getting to the bank that day! We picked ours because he and DP have the same favorite color, mostly. So arbitrary! But seeing some of the guys my friends have married, we can’t do any worse than they did…

Rainbowvalley—yay for October babies! I’m expecting a whole slew of them. (of course, I wish I were just expecting, but what can you do?). You should get your DP some extra thick pj pants so she can sleep without fear! In our case it’s so cold that my DP is pretty much in double pjs all the time anyway, so there wouldn’t be anything to worry about.

Gracie—that sounds like a good plan. I was sort of thinking the same thing—I did test today and yesterday, but it wouldn’t have made a difference since I don’t get the sperm until tomorrow night anyway. But now it can come any time! Also, that is a totally random ferret fact! Poor little things—I wonder what they do in the wild if there are no other ferrets around?

Wishin’—sorry to hear about the not-stellar beta number. But the other signs sound like they’re good, and slow betas definitely still turn into healthy, happy babies!

Seraf—do you think you’d miss the nursing home at all? DP’s grandma just went into a home and it’s quite the happening place! Good luck!

Gelly—That is such a lot of bad stuff all at once! I know that you’re right about it being ok because you’re insured and getting better and whatnot, but still! I hope the break is relaxing—and doesn’t involve any more wildlife!

She's here!
And so are the boys!
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Old 01-12-2011, 08:46 PM
 
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Gracie—that sounds like a good plan. I was sort of thinking the same thing—I did test today and yesterday, but it would’t have made a difference since I don’t get the sperm until tomorrow night anyway. But now it can come any time! Also, that is a totally random ferret fact! Poor little things—I wonder what they do in the wild if there are no other ferrets around?
 

Die : (  domesticated ones they either breed them , mate them with a vacetomied male or give them drugs to cause a fake pregnancy , or more likely fix them
 

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Old 01-13-2011, 07:14 AM
 
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Good morning all~  Supposed to get above freezing today, I'm very excited!

 

 

Isa~  What an interesting QOTD!  I'm usually read a straight anyway, and I don't think the giant baby bump helps.  If I'm talking to random people (like on an airplane, for instance) I notice them look at my hand for a wedding ring, which I haven't been wearing on my swollen finger, so then I guess they just think I'm a slut or something.   I feel fairly sure that people think my 'friend' is very nice to come with me to the grocery store and dr's appointments too. It's always been this way, so I don't let it bug me, unless it's some guy hitting on me. Like Seraf said of her DP, I got lots of those 'how gay are you?'  I was always tempted to answer "I'm more man than you'll ever be, and more woman than you'll ever get".  

 

Escher~ I really hope this is your cycle. The opk dance is such a fussy one, is this it? Is this not it? Should it have been yesterday?  So aggravating! It's great that you noticed the trend in your insems and opk use. If, heaven forbid, this isn't your time, that info will come in handy.

 

 

Max~ YAY!!!!!  You are SO ALMOST THERE!! I certainly think a celebration's in order. Enjoy that shiraz while you still can!

 

 

Lise~ I never thought of it, but I guess you're right. In a closed community like yours I'll bet your news would make waves, though I'm glad the waves are smaller than you'd expected.  I also had to laugh at the possibilities of what might have 'happened' to your donor...

 

 

Rainbow mama~ Hooray for sperm ordering!  Get it going now and you  can be queen of the cute, bumpy sundresses this summer.  And I have to laugh at being a queer elder, but I guess it's true. I was dazzling some young'uns with my tales of AIDS funding protests in the '80s. Ancient history, I tell ya! :)

 

Gelly~ Ugh ugh ugh about all your 2011 ignunce. Who knew a coyote could do such damage!!! But maybe you're just getting the crap out of the way and the rest of the year will be brilliant.  I'm right with you in that Oklahoma becomes completely paralyzed by 6 inches of snow, but last year when I was in New Hampshire it snowed two feet and people were just out going to the store. Flights weren't even delayed! Still, I'll bet they'd freak out at one of our monster thunderstorms, where we're like "Ah, the tornado's going to go north of us, no biggie!"  I'll pass your congrats on to DP.  39.3 miles in two days is pretty impressive, it's true.

 

AFM~ Nothing big going on.  Aspidistra's crazy active the last few days. DP and I were joking about what she could possibly be doing. Playing wii-tennis. Rearranging furniture.  Tae-bo.  It could be any of these things.

 

 

 


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Old 01-13-2011, 08:11 AM
 
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Good morning everyone! wave.gif

I have been reading and following along but really haven't had much to add to the conversation just yet...perhaps I should have waited to join until a little bit closer to go-time...but I'm so sick of waiting! I feel like I'm just always waiting - and I know that it will only get worse :/ But the QOTD from Isa struck a chord in me. It is something I think about all the time actually. I usually get read as straight too even though I have short hair and love football winky.gif so I think having a belly will automatically push me even further into the straight corner. Maybe I'll just start putting more rainbow in my wardrobe...

 

I have a question that kind of piggybacks that one too - are you worried/nervous/anxious about future playground/play group interactions with other parents? I have already faced some discrimination by being "just the nanny" a few times and it sucks. I am not in the closet by any means but I do start to break into a sweat when I think about answering questions like "what does your husband do?"....I will be fine saying something like "oh, I'm married to a woman and she's an attorney" but my fear comes in when I think about potential reactions - especially if the kid(s) are around. It's a silly fear but it's been on my mind lately. Just curious if anyone else thinks like that too.

 


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Old 01-13-2011, 08:12 AM
 
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Rainbow ... Your upcoming insem sounds dreamy!  Or, as dreamy as an event can get when sperm is involved.  Last time we did a FET we had a *very* good time the night before and the RE commented on my bits being a little irritated.  Maybe this time we'll take it easy. 

 

Library ... Yay for being home!  I see so many baby butches around our neighbourhood that I could be a MOTHER to.  Yeesh!  When dd was about a month old, my partner, myself, my sister, and her then-girlfriend went out to dinner to a trendy asian-fusion restaurant.  We were in everyday clothes, I had puke on my shirt, everyone looked haggard and tired, sister and her gf were bickering, the baby was tiny and squirmy and just as we sat down started to cry so I was nursing her.  And we were seated right beside a table of the trendiest little dykelets you ever did see.  All looked like they'd walked off the set of the L Word.  Not a hair out of place, everybody peacocking and being all young and energetic and flirty with each other.  We ordered our food, complete with a litany of special requests ("gluten free, no peppers, bring this first, that later, and could you A, B, and C while you're at it?).  We notice that the other table had fallen silent.  They were blatantly staring at us.  As if glimpsing into their own futures, replete with jeans from Walmart, running shoes to go out to dinner in, non-dyed hair, stained clothes, fluffy bodies, and bickering couples.  My sister, now thoroughly irritated with her gf, nodded her head and said loudly, "Yes, my clueless little darlings, this is what old lesbians look like."  The now horrified baby dykes settled their bill fairly quickly after that and fled, aghast, into the night.

 

wishin ... Much sticky-baby dust coming your way.  dust.gif

 

isa's QOTD:  When I was pregnant with DD we lived in a very small town in the mountains, north of Whistler for anyone who knows of that ski resort.  It's a pretty open-minded place, even though we were one of just seven queer couples there.  No one blinked an eye.  I'm totally out, but only by way of DP, who is a very obvious big bulldagger.  Anyone who knew me also knew that I am queer.  Anyone who didn't know me assumed I had a husband.  Unless you look VERY stereotypically queer (and even then) you will be read as straight.  Unless you fly the flag or don a badge or a shirt that says, "The father is the other mother" or some such thing.  I never get read as queer anyway, so it was no surprise to me that being pregnant and then being a mother pushed me further away from an queer markers.  I get read as straight even more now.  If we get pregnant this time, I'll be visibly pregnant in Canada's biggest dyke neighbourhood, and I'll still be read as straight, by gays and hets alike.  Again, only people who know me know that I'm queer.  Folks on the street read me as straight.  I always come out when anyone (stranger or acquintance) asks about a father or husband or comments that DD must look like 'his' side of the family.  Not usually to my patients on the ambulance though.  I just avoid pronouns if they ask direct questions. 

Heck, we typically get read as a straight family considering that add a child to the butch/femme dynamic and most het folks don't bother to look too closely.  Dolts. 

 

Gelly ... I'm so glad that you're okay!  I hit a deer once and totalled my car.  A cop friend told me to tell the insurance company that the deer hit me, so that I could shuffle the blame along to the animal.  It's so traumatic to hit anything ... I imagine it shook you up.  And this IS your year.  You're just getting the difficult stuff out of the way now, leaving the rest of the year open to greatness!

 

Max ... SO SOON!  I'm getting excited for you! 

 

escher ... How are you feeling?  I've got so many fingers crossed for you, I can hardly function!

 

I'd do more personals but I've lost track! 

AFU:  Tomorrow is the u/s to check the lining.  I'll keep you posted!


dust.gifFour-eyed tattooed fairy godmother queer, mama to my lucky star (5) and little bird (2.5). Resident storyteller at www.thestoryforest.com. Enchanting audiostories for curious kids. Come play in the forest!
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Old 01-13-2011, 09:44 AM
 
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Rainbow ... Your upcoming insem sounds dreamy!  Or, as dreamy as an event can get when sperm is involved.  Last time we did a FET we had a *very* good time the night before and the RE commented on my bits being a little irritated.  Maybe this time we'll take it easy. 

 

Library ... Yay for being home!  I see so many baby butches around our neighbourhood that I could be a MOTHER to.  Yeesh!  When dd was about a month old, my partner, myself, my sister, and her then-girlfriend went out to dinner to a trendy asian-fusion restaurant.  We were in everyday clothes, I had puke on my shirt, everyone looked haggard and tired, sister and her gf were bickering, the baby was tiny and squirmy and just as we sat down started to cry so I was nursing her.  And we were seated right beside a table of the trendiest little dykelets you ever did see.  All looked like they'd walked off the set of the L Word.  Not a hair out of place, everybody peacocking and being all young and energetic and flirty with each other.  We ordered our food, complete with a litany of special requests ("gluten free, no peppers, bring this first, that later, and could you A, B, and C while you're at it?).  We notice that the other table had fallen silent.  They were blatantly staring at us.  As if glimpsing into their own futures, replete with jeans from Walmart, running shoes to go out to dinner in, non-dyed hair, stained clothes, fluffy bodies, and bickering couples.  My sister, now thoroughly irritated with her gf, nodded her head and said loudly, "Yes, my clueless little darlings, this is what old lesbians look like."  The now horrified baby dykes settled their bill fairly quickly after that and fled, aghast, into the night.

 

OK, Starling, that does it.  Please, please submit some writing to LiteraryMama or some other lefty feminist/queer mothering literary magazine.  I can't stand it.  If you don't, I might steal it and say it's mine wink1.gif This is f*cking hilarious!


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Old 01-13-2011, 11:20 AM
 
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Starling~ What a great story. I'm glad the young'uns were properly horrified!  And I agree, you're an excellent writer.


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Old 01-13-2011, 12:06 PM
 
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AMom, glad to see you are back... i've been wondering what was up with you. i'm sorry things haven't worked out for you yet. i just wanted to wish you luck and also say YOU SHOULD POST THE VIDEO OF YOUR TRIP TO IRELAND!!! orngbiggrin.gif it was so good! (i have to admit, i wept redface.gif)

 


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Old 01-13-2011, 12:16 PM
 
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Starling, that is too funny.  And one of 7 queer couples, also funny.  Our household is 2% of the population of our town, if there are any other queer couples here I haven't heard of them.

 

MrsPP, I think the world is getting smaller all the time.  Sometimes kids will argue with each other about whether Osha is a boy or a girl (his mom said he!  No, she has long hair!) but generally no one cares that I'm queer, if they even notice.  It's not like I'm doing anything dirty at the playground, just hanging out with kids.  You're right about people being rude to nannies, tho.  I sure had more trouble with that when I was young (oh, 20 year old with a biracial 3 year old?  people would move to the other side of the bus and ignore us.  That was certainly an eye opening experience).  When Osha was little, I was always open and positive with those daddy questions.  I figured he would have to answer them someday, so I should give him a good example (and when questioned he says, "I don't have a dad."  Never elaborates, never says that he has 2 moms because he doesn't call either of us mom.  The neighbors think I'm trouble.) 

 

 


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Old 01-13-2011, 12:21 PM
 
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Hi Everyone,

Starling: Thanks for keeping your fingers crossed for me! That is a very funny story. It's neat that your sister is queer too. I hope that your ultrasound goes beautifully tomorrow! fingersx.gif

MrsPP: I'm lucky to live in a fairly liberal city, but I'm sure I'll still run into some other parents who are uncomfortable with me being gay. Hopefully they will be able to get over it. shrug.gif

Library: Maybe Aspidistra is preparing for her future skateboarding career? REPlaySkateboard04HL.giforngtongue.gif

Isa: My RE feels like doing three IUIs doesn't increase the likelihood that it will work and it adds a lot of stress and expense. The research she has read is mostly about people doing trigger shots (which I haven't tried yet), and it seems to indicate that two IUIs aren't noticeably more effective than one IUI. She feels like since I'm not doing a trigger shot it may not be a bad idea to do two, but three is more than is needed. I don't know if she is right, but we're following her advice for now.

Gelly: I'm so sorry that you're having such a hard start to 2011! I hope that it improves soon!

Seraf: I think it is hilarious that you took a picture before you helped Ari up. I generally try to insem early, but it seems like even though I often schedule my IUIs before I get a positive opk, I rarely am actually able to insem before the opk turns positive.

Wishin'&hopin': Stick, baby, stick! sticky.gif

Rainbowvalleymama: It is my preferred timing to do an insem before the positive opk, but I find it really hard to actually do, since by the time I'm fairly sure I'm becoming fertile I'm often about to get the positive opk. Good luck with your timing!

Max: Hooray! Your IVF cycle is finally here! Did all your bloodwork check out ok?

AFM: 4dpo. Every month the prometrium seems to give me different side effects. This month I have an especially fantastic sense of smell. Almost everything and everyone smells bad. In fact, I think I can smell all of you through the computer screen! orngtongue.gif

 

 


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Old 01-13-2011, 01:47 PM
 
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seraf, what do the kids call their other mom? i know they call you Baba (right?)... what will sara be called with the new additions? what do osha and ari call sara? sara?

queer parents out there, what do your kiddos call you and what do they call your partner? (and why?)

DP and I  rainbow1284.gif together since 2001, brokenheart.gif 4/10,  pos.gif 7/10
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