seraf, awww... i feel bad for your poor osha having to stay in a booster... but good thing you are a great baba and going to keep him safe anyway.
DS - planned born via 4/4/2011
Me: 33, DP: 32 , together 11 years, 2 crazy dogs and hopefully a little one arriving in November.
Update -- It's a GIRL!! Can't wait to meet her!
Seraf: Great set of stories about your experiences--thanks for taking the time. I'm ignoring the 4'8" recommendation; DD is 4'5", and I could never get her back into a booster seat. I may try to hold out for two years rear facing, but I don't know how. Ugh.
Library: How are the curtains coming? My mom is here and doing curtains for five separate rooms in the house! She has boundless energy--too bad I didn't get very much of it.
EZ: Our homebirth midwives were able to charge our insurance for certain costs with DD (especially prenatal and postpartum care) but had to switch to doula roles once I was in the hospital for preterm membrane rupture. But the prenatal care was AMAZING. I was doing parallel prenatal care (on a reduced schedule) with my back-up OB, and there was NO comparison. I saw my OB (who was GREAT for an OB) for about 5-10 minutes/visit, while I spent an hour with my midwives. The midwives asked about dreams, fears, my relationship with DP, my philosophy about pain, etc. etc. They helped me truly feel ready to give birth and to become a mother. They were the center of a whole support system, not medical "providers." And the best part was that they treated my pregnancy as a normal, natural, healthy, and wonderful process, not an illness. This time, for various reasons (largely financial, but also age and risk-related, given my that DD was preterm), I'm planning for a hospital birth but using midwives. I've been disappointed at how much like OBs my current midwives are, so I'm switching to a different midwifery practice as of April 1st. This practices uses a birth center that is part of a larger hospital, which feels like the right setting for me this time around. But I still wish I'd gotten to have a homebirth with DD and/or had the money and support to plan a home birth this time, despite the (relatively minor) risks. Generally speaking, I agree that with the right midwives and a healthy pregnancy, the risks of homebirth are much lower than the risks of hospital birth. Good luck figuring all this out for yourself. You know that you have our support no matter what you do.
Escher: Hooray for 10 weeks and less prometrium!
AFM: Got into a stupid argument with DP this morning, which threw off the day.... But another crazy busy day at work has gone reasonably well, and I'm excited to be traveling next week. I'm going to San Francisco to give a lecture at Sonoma State in the early part of the week and then up to Seattle to see my brother and his new baby girl later in the week. Over the weekend, I'll get to hang out with my BFF in Seattle, which will be fantastic. She lives up in BC (Victoria), and I miss her so much. I was at the birth of both of her children and learned with her how to be a mom. I can't believe I live 2000 miles away from her now.
Partner of 17 yrs to DP, Mommy to 10-yr-old Z , and Lilah Nyx, born 7/24/11 .
Seraf~ I'm TOTALLY waddling! She dropped Saturday morning and I'm a combination of Groucho Marx and Tacky the Penguin. But I'm fully intent on waddling around the Medieval Fair to claim my Indian Taco! They're really yummy, especially with extra hot sauce. Though 'with extra hot sauce' has been the mantra of this pregnancy! I'm eager to see if Aspidistra's first words are ''more jalapenos, please!!!"
Wehrli~ It is totally hilarious to go and shove your way through the knights and maidens to claim your fry bread, but I am determined. I'd love to get some from someone who actually lived on the rez. I've had Indian Tacos at pow wows, though, and they're even better.
AHope~ Curtaining was going along SO WELL and I've just discovered that one of the linings is too wide. I almost cried!! It's only about four inches and will be easy to trim and turn, but I DIDN'T WANT TO DO THAT! It was all ready for me to sew to the curtain and now I have to backtrack. UGH!! But still, I can do it and will. The room will look so lovely...someday!!! VERY excited for you and your BFF. I hope you have an amazing fun time.
Starling~ How's it going? I know you're busy, but I hope all is well xo
AFM~ Lovely day outside. Sunny and warm finally, and I've opened up the windows. DP has class this evening so I have the house to myself, which I still enjoy while I can.
Sorry I have been MIA but work has changed/enforced internet policies and I just don't have time to post when I am at home...
Things are going swimmingly we are almost 31 weeks . It is feeling almost real! I can't believe that Wherli and Library are due so shortly... It has gone so fast.
We are in love with our midwife and are so excited to have a home birth. She almost cried last time because I gave her a pair of knitted socks for an early thank you gift, Wool socks aren't much help in June . I hopefully will have some time to come back and do personals later
S & Y (Vermont Civil Union 7/8/03) DS1 Holden (4/25/07) and two in heaven 1/10 & 5/10 our is here DS2 Keegan(5/23/11)
Crystal... big hugs. Take care of yourself.
EZ: Our midwife is covered by insurance. She's a naturopathic midwife (and pediatrician, which is a nice bonus) in our network, so we'll pay 20% of the whole-pregnancy fee of $3300 (labs are extra, but insurance covers those). That's for a homebirth, and we'll need to spend a few hundred more on supplies, but those will be covered by our flexible spending account. If we opted to utilize her practice's attached birth center, the 'room charge' is another $1600, I think. I was expecting more like $5000 for the total homebirth cost (about average for bigger cities), so was pleasantly surprised that it was so much less. Frankly, for the level of care I'm receiving, it's a major bargain. We're currently on monthly visits, and each one is an hour, almost all talking with the midwife and her assistant (a student midwife who shadows her for the year). At some point we go to biweekly, then weekly visits. I should add up how many hours of prenatal care that will be - it's a lot! Then she and her assistant will come over when labor begins, stay through the birth (and another midwife colleague joins us when it's time to push), and for several hours afterward to make sure all is well. Then they come back 24 hours later to check on everyone. And baby comes to her practice for a check up, I think at three days.
We went this route for a few reasons. One, I believe my body is built to be able to birth a child - i.e., this is a natural and normal event, and doesn't usually become a medical problem - and I want to be cared for by someone who has the same philosophy and will be supportive of me (which I believe will, in turn, increase my chances of a peaceful, natural home birth). Two, I'm generally a DIY, "leave me alone, I've got this" kind of person, who imagines I'll end up locking myself in the bathroom for much of labor (or prowl around the house being loud and yelling at DP to leave me alone!), and prefer the privacy of being at home around people I've gotten to know; I do think being in an odd environment with docs I hardly know would impede my ability to tackle what's probably going to be the hardest thing I've ever done. I don't need any distractions! :) Three, I've never stayed the night in a hospital; only visited them once or twice for stitches (I was an accident prone kid). I really don't want my baby's birthday to be the first time I spend the night in the hospital. I'd rather be comfortable at home (or in a birth center, had we gone that route), to celebrate the day our family expanded. DP is totally on board now, after she saw biz of being born :)
All that said, I also recognize that we may end up in a hospital, and that's okay. One thing to look for in a midwife is their backup care. I was happy to learn that our midwife has been working with the same OB practice for 15 years, and has an excellent relationship with them (no need for shadow care; he's accustomed to transfers from her at 38 weeks if need be, or meeting at the hospital during labor if something arises). Though she becomes our labor support person should we end up at the hospital, the OB who would meet us trusts her, and will have excellent communication with her, which in turns means good continuity of care for me and baby. And he, too, respects that her patients' goal is a natural child birth, so he'll also do all he can to strive for that (she says he's a straight shooter - if he says it's time for a c-section with one of her patients, it really truly is time for one).
Blah blah blah, I'm chatty today! 23 weeks this weekend, and the little guy is kicking and wiggling up a storm! DP and I are really enjoying that. I think I poke him too much, though :)
Library: Mmmmmmmmmmm Indian taco, droooool. How was it? Describe in detail please;)
Seraf: Ok wow, I am 1 measly little inch away from 4ft 9. My son will be in a booster til he is 14! Our poor boys! Ok wait, you didn't change diapers? How did you manage that one? How are you feeling?
Amanda- Do you have abelly picture for us all?! Are you getting to wear all the cute maternity clothes you picked up in the beginning of your pregnancy? I am so ready for warm weather so that I can wear my cute dresses and skirts!
AFM: Stepdads birthday today so we went to my mama's and slammed on shrimp, crabcakes, deviled eggs, mac and cheese, ranch style beans and lemon torte. Life is good. I gained 5 lbs today. Seriously. I checked.
ez ... Spiritual Midwifery is the book that made me want to be a midwife. I read it when I was fifteen, and it changed my life. I can't believe you're so close to the Farm! I'm crazy with envy! I think it's great that you're getting excited about your options.
seraf ... Oh, the Evil MegaSniffer! I was doing okay for a few days, but then I had a patient at an MVA today that had a dog who was freaked out after the crash, so we took the dog with us, and the dog shat all over the back of the ambulance and I barfed while I was cleaning it up. Oh Lord, it was bad. And I hear you on the food front. I get my partner to pack my lunch the night before because just the thought of food makes me gag. She usually puts in: almonds, edamame in the pod, cheese and rice crackers, celery / carrots / cucumber sticks (with peanut butter for the celery), split pea soup cup, apple, orange, cottage cheese, yogurt, beef jerky (MY SALVATION), dry cereal (gluten free), granola bar(also GF) and leftovers from the meal as a main. I can make that last 14 hours if I dole it out in small doses about every two hours or so, with the main in the middle of the day. I got the shift today at the last moment and had to augment my food with a Carnation Instant Breakfast that i bought at the first gas station we past after I got into the ambulance, but I nearly barfed, so I threw it out. I'd like to add a protein shake to my day, but not one with the crap that's in that stuff. Blech!
Oh, and I cannot believe that your library won't issue a card to kids until they're 8! That's insane! Thankfully our library issues cards no matter the age, and children under 12 don't get late fines. So I can sign out E's books on her card and if we're sloppy getting them back in time, there's no fine! Yay! I think I would've perished had I been denied a library card!
library ... I'm laughing at myself, I was thinking that an Indian Taco was some kind of fusion between Indian (curry, masala, etc) and Mexican food. We typically say "First Nations" up here, so it'd be First Nations bannock. I was liking the idea of the curry taco!
As for how I'm doing ... pretty good! Except that I'm still barfy and gaggy. And I look like I'm a Fatty McFattyson and not a preggo mama. I'm torn between wanting the belly now so that I'll look more obviously pregnant and not wanting the belly because it gets so awkward so fast.
Amy ... Your midwife sounds like a dream!
Had more personals, but I'm drifting off as I type, so I'll have to do them later ...
Library, I could only really enjoy spicy food with Osha. And that kid will eat anything. You know the book eating the alphabet? He had eaten everything in that book, per his request, by the time he was 3. ("Ugli fruit? I've never had that, Baba. Can we get one?") I would take it as a great sign.
Miz yellow, I do think a booster seat would get in the way of driving. I've read that airbags aren't designed for small women, but that was a long time ago, so I tend to hope that that is no longer true. We did EC, that's how I avoided diaper changes. I only planned on doing it part time, like offer the potty after meals, wake up, diaper changes and upon obvious requests. My kid had absurdly sensitive skin, tho. He was diapered his first night and the whole region was raw by morning. Took days of diaper free to heal and we just got the hang of it. Even worse, once he was in a day car situation (at Michigan Womyns Music festival) and we took sposies. He was welted after 5 minutes in a dry diaper. I felt just awful. Generally if I felt a situation warrented protection I could get away with some flannel in a pair of fleece pants. He peed on the floor a fair bit when he learned to walk. LOL. We had hardwood, i wasn't really stressed. But people always yelled at me to, "put a diaper on that kid!" and I would just say, why? He's going to have to take it off in 5 minutes when I take him to the toilet. (it turned out he had a sensitivity to wheat, by the way). Ari just hated diapers. She was very consistent about telling us she needed to go. And I was used to the system.
Starling, your lunch bucket sounds dreamy. I don't go in so much with the dairy. I eat breakfast in the car. Smoothie and fried egg sandwich. Leftovers for lunch, lots of fruit and oatmeal to get me through. Leftovers for dinner. And I get home at 11 pm.
Escher - On the nuchal translucency screening, we decided not to do it. 1) Spina bifida - Planned pregnancy so I had been taking prenatals with folic acid 3 months prior to conception, so there was a low risk. 2) Trisomy 18 - This was a very planned pregnancy, and if our baby were to have this, she may have died inutero, or in the first year of life. I didn't want to have to be the one to decide when her life ended and therefore termination wasn't an option for us. 3) Downs Syndrome - I have a disabled brother who DW and I will care for when my mother passes away and our two adopted kids both have learning disabilities. While I wanted nothing more than for our baby to be "normal," (and she is!), we knew we could handle a kid with down's. We wanted this baby, and again, didn't want to have to make the decision about whether it would live or die. Basically it came down to we wanted a child, this child, and the odds were so low for us to have any of these that we felt it was a risk worth taking. That's not to say that I wasn't slightly anxious until the 20w scan and then until she was born!
Seraf - On booster seats, yes I totally know what you're talking about! I'm not quite sure I get the rules, but it's based upon the following criteria: A child can start using a seatbelt alone once any one of the following criteria is met:
* child turns eight years old
* child weighs 36 kg (80 lb.)
* child is 145 cm (4 feet-9 inches) tall.
I have a 13-year-old son who is very tiny (10th percentile of growth) and guess which is the only criteria he meets? That's right, his age! He only is about 72lbs and just cracked 4"8. Heck, this kid still has 10 baby teeth. We moved him out of his booster seat somewhere between 9 1/2 and 10. Not that I wanted to risk safety, but it just wasn't good for his self-esteem. I recall that they're also looking for certain physiological markers to make it safer...where the seat belt hits, head control, etc. I may be worth checking in with whomever does seat inspections in your area. Now we're dealing with the fact that he's 13 and wants to be able to sit in the front seat. Um, no. He'd get creamed by the air bag.
AmandaHope - Have a lot of fun and adventures in your upcoming travels. They sound fantastic, and I'm a wee bit jealous!
AmyPDX - We had a home birth for many of the reasons you mentioned. I would totally do it at home again. And, that's fantastic on feeling the baby move. That was one of the best parts of pregnancy for me.
MizYellow - That feast sounds so good. Drool. I love food, especially when it's been prepared for me!
Starling - Sounds like another great day on the job. Dog poop. Awesome.
Library and Wehrli - How are you both holding up? I hope that you're both finding time to get plenty of rest and enjoying as much as you possibly can in the last days of your pregnancy. I cannot wait for the arrival of your April aries babies. Happy EDD Wehrli.
AFU - Well, things are better because I feel like we know sorta what we're dealing with. Turns out I have mastitis. We went for a follow up with the lactation consultant yesterday and we went with the caveat of "Our baby seems to do well here, but she's not screaming by the time she gets to the breast, and she just won't latch at home. We need you to watch us and tell us what we're doing wrong." I took off my bra and all bets were off. While I had had flu like symptoms the day before, my MW told me to be on the lookout for mastitis and retention of the products of conception. We didn't really see any clear indications of either. But, the nasty red mastitis welt reared its head right in front of the lactation consultant. Then I got to spend the next hour having her try to get as much of the green puss out of two blocked ducts. It was pretty bad and we had to give up. I went home with a pump, some massage instructions and have been working on getting rid of the blockage, albeit unsuccessfully. I'm off to the doctor's to get a script for antibiotics (because MW's can't write those) and I think I'm going to request an ultrasound as well. Something is just not quite right - UTI or not all of the placenta passed. I suppose this is the universe's way for balancing out an easy conception, pregnancy and delivery!!! Other than that, and sleep deprivation, we're doing fantastic. My MIL arrives for support on Sunday and I hope to get time in the next 24 hours to finally write Addi's birth story.
PS - who is the April thread keeper again? Pregnancy brain .
DW and I are moms to two teens (DD 17 and DS 15) adopted through CAS in 2007 and a toddler (DD 2) born at home in March 2011.
Oh Gumshoe! Oh, dear! Mastistis sucks! Nursing on all fours worked for me, along with positioning babes chin over the trouble spot while nursing (descibed better on kellymom.com). And hot compresses and massage. My thoughts are with you and you boobies! I hope you can sort out any placental retention that might've happened.
Escher ... We decline the Nuchal Screen. Too many worrisome false positives, and both DP and I are on the exact same page in that terminating a pregnancy is not an option for us. So, like a couple of the other folks mentioned above, we do the 20 week anatomy scan, so that we can be prepared to intervene at birth or learn more about any presenting issue that we might need to deal with. The scary one for me is Trisomy 18, but even with that, we're prepared to love up that baby for as long as he or she is with us.
Good morning~ A gorgeous day outside! It's finally springtime I believe (at least for a few minutes, this is Oklahoma after all. It could snow next week, or destroy all our houses with a giant tornado. Who knows! I just hope it stays nice this weekend. I'm serious about that Indian Taco!
Starling~ I like your idea too! Channa masala in some fry bread would rock the house! I love the idea of a First Nations Bannock, though. I'll suggest the change of sign ;) I'm sorry about your food troubles, it sounds like utter misery. At least in the library I can strictly curtail the amount of food (and dog shit) that comes through the doors. Beef jerky is really good, though.
Seraf~ I forgot to comment about the library card thing!! WTF?!!??!!??!?!??!?!? That's total crap library practice, I'll have you know. I'm glad your kiddo's a good eater, I do worry about that. My nephew won't eat anything but Eggo waffles and instant mac n cheese (though my sister is lazy enough to enable this). I just want her to try stuff. I'll get her the Eating the Alphabet book and we'll make it a game. Smart thinking! You should mention it to your library!
Painefaria~ Nice to see you! Thanks for checking in, and I'm so glad everything is going well. You're closer than you think!!
Amy~ Chat away! You're always interesting. I agree with you about the Biz of being Born, and it did make me reconsider, but in the end I'm happy with what we've chosen. Well, I guess we'll see if we still like it after it's all over. I'm glad your baby's kicking up a storm. It's the very best feeling!
Miz Yellow~ I will give you the yummy blow by blow as soon as I get back this afternoon!!
Gumshoe~ YIKES!!!!!!! I was reading your green pus description and apparently made the most horrifying face because DP shouted 'OMG what's wrong!' I'm very sorry you're going through that, but at least you know what it is now and can work on getting it taken care of. Hopefully this will be the end of your ignunce and then you'll be able to settle into your routine. And yes, I'm resting as much as possible. I just have to be careful not to eat and eat as I lie about the house watching Mystery Science Theater on netflix. I'm getting housework done, though, so that's good.
AFM~ No early labor signs yet, even though DP is driving me up a wall asking me if I'm having mucous breakup or back pain every five minutes ; ) Mostly just focusing on that taco...
Crystal--sending you lots of healing energy. I hope you both have plenty of rest and support to heal. See you back here down the road!