Just wondering what others usually do. I'm not sure how to do it with two mommies. I kinda pictured a day with a card or small gift and then getting to do whatever you want. Maybe lunch, a massage, or something nice, maybe be pampered a bit and not have to do much of the parenting "work" for the day. So how do you do that with two moms? lol It doesn't seem like it would be that much of a special day if it's celebrating both parents. I wanted to take Father's Day as my Mother's Day but DW doesn't like that idea and doesn't want us to celebrate Father's Day at all. We both very much identify as mom, so...what do you all do?
Beth- WOHM -Madly in love with my Wife- SAHMandSophia, born 11/2/10, at home! Expressing love, one ounce at a time!
I get Mother's Day and DP gets Father's Day. Works for us. DP calls it 'Alternative Parent' day. Last year I got her a stamped silver medallion necklace that said "Esmé's Babe since 01.31.09" ... she loved it! It's not the perfect solution at all. I'd love to hear other folks' ideas!
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We both very much identify as moms, so father's day wouldn't really work for either of us. What we do is hire a sitter so we can go out together and have "us" time, whether that be going out to dinner, mountain biking, hiking, etc.
And one more thought - my partner and I always wonder why there can't be several parents/guardians days throughout the year instead of these days valorizing one family form.
i'm curious to see what everyone has to say... i think we may choose not to celebrate such a day. we are not fans of "holidaze" in general.
DS - planned born via 4/4/2011
Generally, we just have a regular day. And usually chuckle at all of the folks who think it must be an EXTRA SPECIAL day for us. Yes, it's extra special being moms to two amazing kids and being moms together. But there's really nothing different when there's not one person to shower the other with extra goodness. Which is fine. I, too, find the whole concept a bit weird and certainly limiting and heteronormative.
I get Mother's Day and my partner, who goes by Duda, gets Duda's Day on the day everyone else celebrates fathers. That said, we don't really *do* anything besides maybe exchange cards and tell each other how much we love one other. You could always pick a random day or days on the calendar to celebrate one or the other of you and make it a family tradition. That's what traditions are afterall--something somebody made up and everyone else keeps up. :)
I get Mother's Day and my partner, who is trans, gets Father's Day. I agree that ideally we'd have a non-gendered "Parents Day," but in the meantime, this works for us.
A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!
Building queer family since 2008!
(and oh, did i mention we're having twins?!?)
DP and I both "celebrated" mother's day last year because we both identify as mothers. For us, it's a day to celebrate motherhood, being a mom and in the future, for our child(ren) to celebrate us! I don't really feel like it has anything to do with one's family make up. It's just a mom thing, single mom, mom with dad, two moms, all kinds of moms. If someone doesn't identify as a mom then no reason to celebrate! Same thing with father's day. We won't celebrate it because DD doesn't have a father. However, a lot of kids do so I think it's a great day for them and their families to celebrate fathers!
Queer Parenting since 2007
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