Queer Conceptions July 2012 - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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Old 07-06-2012, 09:10 PM
 
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Originally Posted by kgulbransen View Post

Wishin: bummed the f*** out for you. I'm sorry.

 

Soto: why do family and friends have to be so difficult? I am convinced that not everyone has the "sensitivity chip" that they should have (in my personal opinion). Our society does a good job of supporting self-centeredness and selfishness. I was just listening to an infertility friend gripe last night about going to see her family at a wedding a week ago and how painful it was because it seemed like so few people in her family were taking into consideration her feelings about her TTC struggles. It's really hard to have expectations of others and those expectations don't get met -- no matter what the scenario!

 

AFM: I had my egg retrieval yesterday. 23 retrieved, 15 mature, 14 fertilized. For a 40-year old, that's pretty good. Let's hope that there's at least a couple in the bunch that are genetically normal! It would really suck to know I'm an egg-making/embryo-fertilizing machine but with no real output...

 

Krista


Great news, Krista!


Me joy.gif, DP treehugger.gif, S bikenew.gif and L babyboy.gif
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Old 07-07-2012, 07:05 AM
 
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Amy: I tried to PM you but I have to wait another week bc I am a new member. Could you tell me

where to find the tomcat catheter online?? If not that's okay.

 

So I know this question has been asked before, but what is the best day to POAS? I will be DPO 12 tomorrow

if I got the timing right. I should know by then right if I get the FRER? I work Monday-Wednesday and

have to leave my house by 6am, so DP would have to wake up really early with me. I am just scared

to see a BFN I guess. Then to make matters worse on timing, I leave Thursday to go to TN to visit my

family. AF should be here no later than that day, yack!

 

I just really want it to work out, but once again my hopes are not up yet. I wish my body would yell a sign

at me..surrender.gif

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Old 07-07-2012, 08:44 AM
 
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Erin- Here is the kind DW and I use...Hope this helps


Finally after 26 cycles we got our pos.gif

 

***4***8***12***16***20***24***28***2ndtri.gif***36***40

Mom to Matthew(11), Brett(9), and soon Emmitt Parker! Now playing mom to nephew David (7)!

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Old 07-07-2012, 09:48 AM
 
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Thanks Amt! Do you just use with a regular syringe?
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Old 07-08-2012, 12:06 AM
 
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wishin: I'm sorry greensad.gif

 

darth: Good luck for your DW's appointment on Tuesday. I hope it's ok and you can get started! What sperm bank are you using btw?

 

lovestreet: I hope things improve and your insem goes well tomorrow. I've heard many stories on here of things improving from day to day!

 

outdoorsy: Hmmm is your progesterone really low? Apparently it can change from day to day depending on time, etc. Do you have any symptoms of a progesterone deficiency? Spotting, short LP, etc. I'm sorry this wasn't picked up sooner - it's an easy one to fix!

 

erin: For me, I feel like I would definitely know by 13 or 14DPO....but I tested positive this time on 11DPO and 10DPO with DD. If you do test and it's negative....there is still a chance you might get a positive!

 

 

Afm: Nothing too exciting going on for me. The pain I was having is pretty much gone and only bugs me once in awhile if I move a certain way while laying down. I'm trying to cope with the anxiety and although I abhor wishing my days away I wish I was closer to July 19th which is when I have my first u/s. Still pregnant as far as I know though...


Me joy.gif, DP treehugger.gif, S bikenew.gif and L babyboy.gif
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Old 07-08-2012, 05:18 AM
 
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Carmen: That makes me feel better about wanting to test this morning thank you! I am trying to wait
until DP wakes up but I really have to go ugh!

I will keep you guys posted..I have a bad feeling so we'll see.
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Old 07-08-2012, 09:41 AM
 
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Carmen, we don't know yet!!  DW is waiting to have her test done, she doesn't want to look at donors until we know we can actually start picking them.  Genesis has a shortlist of banks they use, and there's one bank that they get so much sperm from that they don't charge shipping if you order it with the rest of the group (i.e., Genesis puts out an order once a month, I think it's the Cryobank Labs?  Not sure).  


Me (29) and DW (32).  Taking a long break from TTC, back at it sometime in 2015/2016.  2 fur babies cat.gif cat.gif, Mustang and Anastasia.
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Old 07-08-2012, 11:40 AM
 
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Can I please be moved to the 2WW list?  smile.gif

 

Insem this morning went well!  Yesterday during my 2nd ultrasound, had a bunch of big, open follicles, and uterine lining was still at a 5b.
Today, had a bunch of CM, just like last time.  My cervix was off to the side a bit, but was still easy enough to get to, said the RN.  Good vial, they said, at 17 million.

 

Question for you ladies....  Do you get ovulation pain?  And if so, do you know when the pain happens in relation to your actual ovulation?  The reason I'm asking is that I woke up yesterday with a wicked headache, and it lasted allllll day.  I do get migraines, but they are usually in the same areas of my head and this was a different area.  I took 2 Imitrex, but that didn't get rid of it at all.  So I tried to just sleep and rest.  At 1:30 yesterday, I had a sharp pain in my left lower abdomen, near where my ovary is.

My concern is that I actually ovulated yesterday, and had the insems today and tomorrow.  So, during my ultrasound on Friday things just looked okay, but then on Saturday things looked really good.  And Saturday is when I got my crazy-ass headache and had that pain.  I haven't been doing any hormone tests at home, since I've been getting blood tests done at the clinic, but I suppose those might help me pin-point it.  If I did ovulate yesterday, what do you think the chances are that the insem today could still take?

 

Thanks for your help!  I'm still such a newbie at this.
 

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Old 07-08-2012, 11:37 PM
 
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Lovestreet- Your signs sound so good that I think your insem was probably excellently timed. We can never know 100% right? To me, though, your signs from this morning were very promising. 

 

Afm- this was a really great weekend. So nice in comparison to the past week! I blogged about it and my friend and I are actually making a blog contract with each other too so we can get back into writing. It always makes me feel so much better to write. I'm really excited about it. :)


DW (39) and I (32) have been married since October 2010. We have been kitty mommies to Georgio cat.gif and Bella cat.gif for a while now, but we're now real mommies to one beautiful little girl babygirl.gif, Olivia Grace, born 11/19/13 at 5:56am.
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Old 07-09-2012, 11:41 AM
 
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Carmen - My progesterone was 2.98 on 16 DPO, six days after the surge started. I hope you're right that it's an easy fix, but she said the low prog indicates ovulatory dysfunction, and it's not clear to me whether the low prog in itself is the problem or whether it points to some unidentified problem. I have a re-test Thursday, and then she's going to tell me what she thinks we should do.


babyf.gif... due in late June.

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Old 07-09-2012, 03:57 PM
 
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Hopeful- Can you add me to the TWW please? Thanks!

 

So I chickened out and did not take a test..I am really scared to see BFN like my DP did. It hurt enough just to see hers.

I am going to try to get up the courage to take one tonight. I am 13DPO with no signs of AF but my luteal has been

as long as 15 days. There's no way it could have worked the first try! I don't have luck like that!

 

Anyway, I guess I will just hang until I can figure out what I want to do.

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Old 07-09-2012, 04:10 PM
 
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Erin - some people do have luck like that. It could be you. Or, it might not. I hope it's you. Good luck!

 

Some more news from me --- AF arrived this afternoon. A 19-day cycle! This is a record low after last month's 28-day cycle on Clomid and my usual 35-39 day cycle over the last two years. I called the RE and she said this could actually be good news in a way, because it means my progesterone was more appropriate for the time of my cycle than we thought, and we must have caught it on the way down. The question remains, though, why the cycle was so short and whether I'm truly ovulating. I asked if it could be from the Clomid, and she said probably not. I have an u/s and bloodwork set for CD 9.


babyf.gif... due in late June.

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Old 07-09-2012, 05:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hey all. Busy weekend around here!

 

I believe I have moved everyone where they need to be. If you need to be moved please post in bold to make sure I see it. Thanks!

 

I have a lot to say but really need to be working so I will try to post more later tonight or tomorrow. 


After years of waiting, DP and I are so excited for the arrival of our baby girl, expected January 15th 2015.
Remebering our Angel Baby, Emery.

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Old 07-09-2012, 07:25 PM
 
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Carmen - My progesterone was 2.98 on 16 DPO, six days after the surge started. I hope you're right that it's an easy fix, but she said the low prog indicates ovulatory dysfunction, and it's not clear to me whether the low prog in itself is the problem or whether it points to some unidentified problem. I have a re-test Thursday, and then she's going to tell me what she thinks we should do.

 

I hope it's an easy fix too! It's a good first step that they've identified it :)

 

 

Afm: It's looking like I'm having another miscarriage. I posted already on the queer & pregnant thread but thought I'd update here too. I had some spotting and cramping this morning and was still afraid of an ectopic pregnancy so I went to the ER. They did an u/s and saw a gest. sac and a yolk sac but no fetal pole. My hcg is on the low side too. Both of these things *might* not mean anything bad but with the mild symptoms I've had I'm not feeling very hopeful.


Me joy.gif, DP treehugger.gif, S bikenew.gif and L babyboy.gif
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Old 07-09-2012, 10:00 PM
 
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I'm so sorry Carmen.  It's so difficult that you have to go through this again.  It's so unfair.  I'm still hopeful that everything will be ok.  hug2.gif 




Married to a wonderful woman since 2010. Baby boy C arrived in June 2013!

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Old 07-09-2012, 10:03 PM
 
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Ohhh, Carmen!!  greensad.gif  I'm so sorry...  I'm so hoping those symptoms are just something else happening.  But it sounds like you know what you're experiencing.  I'm so sad about this!  I loved reading your posts and knowing that the process worked for one of us!  All I'm thinking about getting those little swimmers to do their job, and I haven't really wrapped my head around "What if it doesn't stick?"  Can't do that yet.

I don't know what else to say.  I'm so sorry, Hon.  We're really pulling for you to feel better!  For whatever this is to go as smoothly as possible, without too much trauma to you.

I'm sending good vibes and a big hug!!  hug2.gif
 

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Old 07-10-2012, 09:23 AM
 
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Oh Carmen, big hugs to you. I am sending you all the hope and love I've got right now.


A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!

Building queer family since 2008!

(and oh, did i mention we're having twins?!?)

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Old 07-10-2012, 04:53 PM
 
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Carmen: I'm so sad. I'm not going to try to convince you otherwise because I know ou know these signs all too well. All I can do is send you lots of hugs and pray that you get your answers sooner rather than later.

AFM: ultimately, we wound up with 7 embryos biopsies and frozen. Two "are stellar" and the other five "would make a healthy pregnancy." of course all that remains to be seen once we get the genetic results back in a week or so.

Two things that have interested me in this since I had an outstanding number of eggs and a high fertilization rate for a woman my age.... First, I have been taking DHEA, CoQ 10 and Royal Bee's Jelly for some time now. I know they are just starting to do larger studies on DHEA and improving egg quality. Secondly, if this is a numbers game and you believe the theory that it's only a matter of time before your number comes up, and you pair it with the fact that at 40 about 65-70% of my eggs are "bad" then I've actually done just slightly better than the average 40 year old. I had about a 50% bad egg rate. So if it is a numbers game, then my good egg just hadn't come forth yet in all my other cycles. And if we wind up with even two genetically good embryos, who is to say how long and how many cycles it would have taken to get there or how many more miscarriages I would have had to have. My journey is far from being over or having it's final ending but I get closer to understanding everything conception related that I ever have! My friend and I are actually thinking of starting an UVF and conception coaching service with a focus on lesbians and single moms. :-)

Krista

me (40) DP (47) TTC since April 2010, 5 IUIs & 6 at home w/ fresh
Short luteal phase, septum resection in Sept 2011
Jan 2011 a BFP! Try #11 angel.gif 8w2d (blighted ovum)
April 2011 BFP! Try #12 angel.gif 9w2d (no heartbeat)

Nov 2011 BFP! Try #14 angel.gif 8w0d (twins, no heartbeat)

June 2012 -- Moving onto IVF with PGD

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Old 07-10-2012, 05:05 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh Carmen- I am so very sorry for everything that is going on. I am really hoping and praying that this pregnancy will stay and you won't have to go through this again.  hug2.gif

 

Wishin- I am sorry about your BFN.

 

Outdoorsy- I am glad you are getting care from an RE. I hope all your questions can be answered and your cycles can be figured out so you can get your BFP!

 

Erin- Good luck with testing or waiting it out. I hope you get beginners luck and are able to graduate this forum quickly! fingersx.gif I agree with what the others have said about practicing with a speculum. My DW and I got really good with it during the three months we tried at home. You had also asked about doing things at home vs. with a RE- the advice we have been following is three times at any given stage. 

 

Soto- Go Ducks! We should totally take our babies to a game together! twins.gif My DW loves getting baby duck stuff for our future fan and I am sure she can't wait to be able to take our babe to a game. I am so sorry about your family. They sound incredibly rude and insensitive but I am glad that you and your DW are doing better and you are able to get an appt with a therapist. It can do wonders to talk to someone who isn't wrapped up in your life. Enjoy your trip to the hot springs for your anniversary. We got back on Sunday. It was so nice to get away and the weather was perfect!!

 

lovestreet- it sounds like your timing is right on. Do you or have you temped before? That is usually the easiest way for me to pinpoint O. If you haven't done it I hope you don't have to start!

 

Darth- I can't wait to move you guys out of the waiting to be ready section! 

 

Krista- Way to make those eggs! Congrats on the great number of fertilized eggs. When do you find out more?

 

AFM- DW and I had an amazing time in Central Oregon this last weekend. We really needed time to get away and be able to have fun together and relax.We went hiking, kayaking, to the museum, floated in the river, toured breweries and ate some amazing food. Here is a picture we took while hiking: 

smith rock.jpg

 

We also got some time to talk about things that we have been putting off talking about. Mainly TTC. We decided to take a break this month for two reasons. The first being that we were planning on starting Clomid this cycle and with that my RE wants to do an ultrasound on CD1-3 and CD 1 started after we left to go out of town for a few days so there was no way we could get in for that ultrasound without cutting our trip short. The second reason being my DW. I think she is having a hard time with this whole process. She seems pretty removed from TTC and she has suggested a few times that maybe a break would be good for us. I think this is coming from a lot of places. We have been in this process of planning and TTC since last Sept. ( I just had to look back at my FF to see when I started charting daily and I can't believe it has been almost a year!) Another part is that my DW is turning 30 soon and is one of those people who is slightly freaking out about it. I think she may be seeing it as the end of an era or something. I am not sure it has anything to do with the actual birthday but more to do with the fact that she just finished school, is starting her career and starting a family. I think she is feeling like she needs to soak up all the time that she has of being young and free or something. Its really odd for us because we aren't into drinking or partying or doing things that she couldn't do when she is 30 with a career and kids. All I know is that I have to respect her wishes and make sure that we are on the same page about this whole process. And really since deciding to take a break I have felt a huge sense of relief. It will be nice not to think about it so much or to not worry if I may be pregnant. I got to enjoy several glasses of wine and several cocktails and a hot tub over the weekend! Things I wouldn't be able to do if we had been in the TWW. Anyway, I am totally rambling now. So as of right now we are at least taking this month off and then seeing how we feel at the beginning of August. I will continue to check in and update positions since I have signed up to be threadkeeper this month. Sorry for taking all the luck and not even using it but I will send a little to each of you! dust.gif


After years of waiting, DP and I are so excited for the arrival of our baby girl, expected January 15th 2015.
Remebering our Angel Baby, Emery.

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Old 07-10-2012, 09:34 PM
 
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Carmen- I am really sorry...I am sending good thoughts your way.

Hopeful- Thanks for your encouragement! Did you mean it takes an
average of 3 times? Or did I misunderstand? That seems about right.

AFM- well I got the courage alright...on DPO 14 tonight I took a test
against my better judgement bc I feel AF coming on. BFN. Gosh it is
really hard to see that one dark line staring at you. Very depressing
but my first time so I guess I am not surprised. I will try again after
practicing with the speculum at the end of July.

So hopeful could you move me to waiting to O? thanks.
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Old 07-10-2012, 11:31 PM
 
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Erin, I'm sorry about your BFN.  :(  Huge bummer.  Next time, right???

 

Hopeful, I know what you mean about needing a break!  I hope you have a lovely break and are ready to get back on the horse after your month of intense wild partying (haha).

 

Krista, those are not bad!  I hope the genetic test comes out clean on at least a couple of them!  I've cared for babies in our NICU who were the ONLY EMBRYO that fertilized and was genetically normal, so I know they do exist!!  :D  (The NICU part was because they were born slightly early, like 32-35 weeks, not insanely early like under 32).  

 

AFU: I could've sworn I posted an entry last night, but my computer must've eaten it.  We had our donor insemination orientation yesterday, which was great!  We got all pumped up about picking donors, came home and actually STARTED looking at donors (and proceeded to laugh hysterically at the donor profiles where you can hear the donor talking).  Tried to figure out what combination of genetics we want to give our kids (DW is half Chinese, so there's that option, or trying our hand at getting some blue eyed babies, since both of us carry a recessive blue-eyed gene as both of our moms have blue eyes and dads have brown eyes, and we have brown eyes).  Something over 6' maybe?  Oh god, I just want to throw up my hands.  We want a donor with confirmed pregnancies and live births, the genetic screens are pretty important for us too (I'm a NICU nurse, I'm allowed to be even MORE neurotic than the average homo).  

 

ANNDD then today happened, which involved DW's hysteroscopy.  Turns out the "little dip" they saw on the HSG is actually a rather large fibroid on the back of her uterine wall.  It needs to come out.  Cue curse words.  So, now we wait 2-3 months for a surgical date to get it out.  Since we are dirty socialist communists, we have not-for-profit healthcare, which means we don't have to pay for any of this, woohoo!  I guess when I freaked out about how we were going to magically afford all of this, this is how the universe responded.  I need to learn to keep my mouth shut.  ;)  So unfortunately my bum will stay firmly planted in the "waiting to be ready" section of the program, which annoys the snot out of me.  In the meantime, it's OT heaven at work, and DW just got a new job, so we'll be pretty busy for the next little while anyways.  

 

Peace out, y'all!!


Me (29) and DW (32).  Taking a long break from TTC, back at it sometime in 2015/2016.  2 fur babies cat.gif cat.gif, Mustang and Anastasia.
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Old 07-11-2012, 06:21 AM
 
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Hey, everyone!

 

Checking in again! I've been keeping up even though I haven't been posting. I'm not going to do personals for everyone, but I'll try to hit a few.

 

Erin: Welcome! It takes time; you'll get there!

 

Krista: Those sound like some good eggs. Good luck!

 

Carmen: I'm so sorry you're having to go through this again. Good thoughts heading your way.

 

Darth: Why are they making you wait for so long? I don't get it; down here, if I needed that surgery, my doc would call up the hospital and have me in within a week unless it had to be done at a certain point in my cycle, at which time they would do it.

 

AFU: I'm still enjoying the break. I'll go in towards the end of next month for my hsg and then we'll try in September, hopefully. We're moving this weekend, so it's a good thing I'm not pregnant at the moment!

 

Came back to add: I definitely O'd last month and AF showed up right on time. I'm pretty sure I O'd this month as well. I've lost another 2 pounds. Four more and I'll be back to my high school weight! Does anyone know of any supplements that would be safe to take with my meds that would help make my O stronger? Thanks!


Mother to one dd .
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Old 07-11-2012, 08:58 AM
 
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Carmen, I'm so sorry. It's so unfair this may be happening to you again. I hope you get answers soon.

 

Erin, sorry about the BFN. But AF brings a new beginning -- good luck next cycle!

 

Darth, bummer about the fibroid. I hope you're back in the game soon.

 

AFM - Waiting for u/s and bloodwork Tuesday. Late last week I found a pretty big lump in my breast. I saw my GYN, who sent me to a surgeon. He checked to see if it was a cyst by inserting a needle to draw out fluid, and it was! Woo-hoo!!! No tumor. It was actually two cysts next to each other, but now they're gone, so I'm back on schedule for my first monitored cycle. The surgeon said it's possible the Clomid contributed to the cysts. This cycle I'm going natural to see what happens. My RE still has doubts about whether I'm ovulating.


babyf.gif... due in late June.

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Old 07-11-2012, 09:31 AM
 
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Morning everyone

Erin sorry for bfn ...next month !!

Carmen... Hugs to you I can't imagine what this is like but know I'm thinking of you ....

Hopeful sometimes a break is good enjoy it smile.gif

Sorry for missing people I'm on my phone ...

Afm I'm on day 5 of injectables... Go in for my 3rd u/s today to see how they r growing ... Iui could b tomorrow mayb Friday or even as late as Sat ....this round of meds has made me a little grumpy ...and emotional and sometimes bitchy ...my poor DP is getting the bulk if it :/
We are also gearing up for a six day camping trip... Ambitious ...crazy ??? Lol

Hi to everyone I missed smile.gif

Loving life with our triplet boys born Feb 24th 2013 at 34 weeks biggrinbounce.gif

 

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Old 07-11-2012, 11:26 AM
 
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Just letting everyone know that I will be back and ready to try again next cycle (AF next week)! I have injectables waiting for me in the fridge...a little nervous about that so I might be asking questions soon. Hope everything is going well with you all!

M (30), D (30)  TTC #1 since October 2010. 13 unsuccessful cycles--no meds (2 m/c). First medicated IUI July 2012: BFN. Second medicated IUI: BFP! Triplets! bigeyes.gif Actual Due Date: May 17...GOAL: April 5th!

 

Sawyer, Elliott, and Miles arrived on March 24th @ 32 weeks & 2 days.

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Old 07-11-2012, 11:46 AM
 
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Lise .... Injectables are not bad ... This time I barely feel the needle and side effects were less than clomid alone .... Fx they do the trick for you !!!

Afm just back from re ... These follicles are slow growing this time ... My iui won't be until Saturday ... innocent.gif

Loving life with our triplet boys born Feb 24th 2013 at 34 weeks biggrinbounce.gif

 

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Old 07-11-2012, 12:21 PM
 
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My partner and I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter through IVF (my partner's egg in my body) and we are trying to conceive again. This time we're doing a super ovulation cycle at the end of July (my egg, my body).

 

I find the isolation the hardest part as there are not any other lesbians in our small community who are trying to conceive (or have kids- that we are connected with).  I imagined when we had our daughter that we would make more parenting friends, but instead we still connect best with other lesbians without kids.  How do others find this situation in their communities?

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Old 07-11-2012, 01:52 PM
 
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Tara - Sorry to hear you are feeling isolated. I think there are some Vancouver-area folks on here, and/or on the Queer, Pregnant, and Parenting board (like darthtunaqueen). Maybe you can meet up with them!


babyf.gif... due in late June.

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Old 07-11-2012, 04:25 PM
 
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Erin- I'm sorry about the BFN.  It would be awesome if it worked the first time, but it doesn't always.  Better luck next time!

 

darthtunaqueen - Good luck finding a new donor!  That can be a pretty funny experience.  I'm sorry to hear about the fibroid, but it's good you know before you spend all that money on sperm.  I hope the surgery comes quickly and goes smoothly so you can get back on the train.  Congrats to DW on the new job.  It is good to be employed!  I hope your break is restful and productive.  See you later!

 

rs - It's good to hear from you!  Congrats on the new place and on losing weight and for O'ing on your own.  That's awesome!  Sounds like you'll be in a good place in September.

 

Outdoorsy -  I'm so glad that was just cysts. What a relief!  I'm glad you are getting more information on what's happening.  I hope it all starts to come together soon. 

 

Cananny - I'm sorry you have been feeling grumpy.  I hope your follies get with the program!  Grow, grow, grow!  A lot could change in a few days.

 

Lise - It's great to hear from you too!  I hope the injectibles go well for you.  I will be using them next month.  Very exciting!

 

Tara - Welcome.gif  Good luck TTC #2!  We are hear to talk about all your TTC woes and triumphs.  I'm sorry you are feeling isolated.  Like Outdoorsy said, there are quite a few Canadian families on the QPP forum.  I think they recently had a discussion on there too about feeling isolated and how to meet like-minded parenting friends.

 

AFM - Not much going on here.  Just taking my vitamins and herbs, going to acupuncture, exercising, etc.  Tomorrow I am getting a massage, and I am very excited about it.  I haven't had one in a long, long time. 

grouphug.gif and goodvibes.gif to all!




Married to a wonderful woman since 2010. Baby boy C arrived in June 2013!

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Old 07-11-2012, 10:38 PM
 
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Hi Tara!!  I'm in Vancouver (as is Carmen, who also has a 2.5 year old, and Starling&Diesel, who has a 3ish year old and a baby).  I'm surprised to hear that SSI doesn't have more of the gayby making going on!  I know there's lots of amazing (straight) families over there, have you connected with any of them?  


Me (29) and DW (32).  Taking a long break from TTC, back at it sometime in 2015/2016.  2 fur babies cat.gif cat.gif, Mustang and Anastasia.
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