I'll join the book train (even though I'm a long time graduate from here)! I love passing on books that I love :)
Our little snotbucket is sick again. So another bad night for her, and the spectre of another bad week for her mamas. -sigh- At least it'll hit over the weekend again, I hope.
And so are the boys!
Croup hit our house last night. I got home from phone banking at 10pm, got in bed at 11, boyo started coughing and struggling to breathe at 11:30p...if my wife wasn't a doctor I'm thinking we would have been at the hospital last night. As it was, he slept and hacked across my body until around 4am when he asked for more honey (it's what we give for coughs, works great but not up to croup) and I was able to relax about putting him in his own bed (the airway swelling had eased up). So, apparently with croup it's a cough at night (not much during the day, hence he got "better" as morning approached), and it's worse the second night and the worst the third night. Cold air can reduce the airway swelling so a walk in the cold can help as can steam. That said, we're headed to his doc this afternoon where I get to be the fun patient who tells her "hey, he has croup and we would like a shot of dexamethasone". So, this morning we did a few puzzles and now I have introduced him to Barney...
Two moms and two boys enjoying the truth that love always wins!!!
Have anyone/partners induced breastfeeding? We are thinking about doing it but don't really want to go the birth control route. I was wondering how possible it would be to NOT be medicated?
M (30), D (30) TTC #1 since October 2010. 13 unsuccessful cycles--no meds (2 m/c). First medicated IUI July 2012: BFN. Second medicated IUI: BFP! Triplets! Actual Due Date: May 17...GOAL: April 5th!
Sawyer, Elliott, and Miles arrived on March 24th @ 32 weeks & 2 days.
What exactly is a book train? I'm sure we're game.
No fun on the croup, makes me feel like our boys' runny noses are nothing.
Lise, hopefully someone in the know will tell you about inducing lactation. I made milk before my first pregnancy, so I know it's possible if your hormones are right (wrong?). I think about how you're going to nurse 3 babies often when I'm attached to our 2. At the very least she will be able to nurse with an SNS if she tries just pumping and it doesn't bring in as much milk as needed. You're going to be busy (as newborns I think our kids nursed 45 minutes out of every hour). Somewhat unrelated, paper plates are our friends. We still use paper plates for many of our meals. I highly recommend them.
Nos, how is everything?
Over here, Soren said "Mum mum" today. Shay jumps now. Ari is missing a lot of teeth. Osha is much less sensitive since we changed our schedule with their mama.
Walking and skateboarding (his very fancy diaper is a folded t-shirt in a belt).
Hairy and hairless.
Toothless and toothlesser.
He isn't fussy, but he is up a lot.
Oh man, sorry to everyone who is sick. Add me to the list - I've been feeling cold-ish all week and have been avoiding my wife and daughter (which, as you all know, SUCKS. But if it keeps them healthy, I will.).
Welcome, Cordelia! Congratulations!
Also, add us to the Book Train list! Happy to send some things along.
Sara and Seraf, wahoo about the walking Shay and the talking Soren and the less-sensitive Osh and the toothless Ari! As always, your house sounds like bundles of fun. And laundry. And paper plates. ;)
So I've had a really hard week. I work in a small laboratory, and usually we're "full-staffed" with four people. They fired the newest guy last Friday. Tuesday, another coworker's wife just had their third baby so he has been off since then and is coming back Wednesday. So we're down half the staff, and I've been working 14 hour days to cover. On top of it, I started coming down with some kind of cold Monday night and have been staying away from DW and DD ever since then. Days have gone by where I haven't even seen Evie awake, and I haven't held her since Monday night. I'm trying really hard to be glad for all the overtime money I'm going to be bringing home, but mostly I'm spending all my time feeling sorry for myself. And feeling sorry for DW - she must surely feel like a single mom these days. And poor Evie, threw up all over herself and DW tonight and on the way into the bath, peed all over DW and the floor and I couldn't help. I hate this!
I'm dreading next week, because Tuesday is my current boss' last day and Wednesday there is a brand new supervisor and two new techs coming in for their first day. And there will only be two of us who are familiar with the lab. I think I may be working more fourteen hour days.
Well, here are happier things: pictures!
DW was crocheting little flowers for the blanket below while Ever slept. CUTE.
Happy one month birthday!
Mom and Mama to our Clever daughter (9.1.12), and cautiously expecting our rainbow baby after a miscarriage in February! We have a blog, too!
Desert, I'm sorry you're having such a bad week. We already know that I'm a jerk, but for further evidence, I have NEVER avoided my own baby because I had a cold. Did you ever get your milk to come in? If you nursed her, she should get the antibodies your body is developing against it, right? If not, just wash your hands, don't sneeze or cough directly on her, wear a mask of some sort if you feel compelled. Sorry to hear about the long days. Those are rough. I try to cook on my days off so I have food to take to work and Sara has food to eat at home. It's not a perfect system, tho. I hope y'all get back to fully staffed very quickly. Evie is darling as ever.
Daycare, on the other hand, was a germ factory that felled her regularly, but she never seemed to get sick from us.
Unrelated question for all of you: those of you who are sushi eaters, did you abstain from raw fish while pregnant? My nausea has let up a bit today and ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT IS SUSHI. I ate some when I was pregnant with DD, but not til later on (3rd trimester, maybe?). Thoughts? I think it's cuz I'm home visiting my mom and wanting her to take me out for sushi.
A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!
Building queer family since 2008!
(and oh, did i mention we're having twins?!?)
Desert ... I'll join the don't-stay-away dance party too! She's a healthy kid and being exposed to bugs will just make her healthier and more robust down the line. Go snuggle that baby! Bonding is more important that a snotty nose! You are as much a parent to her as your DP is, and were she sick, there'd be no choice, being that she's the nursing mama. I remember lying on the floor in a fetal position beside the family bed when H was about two months old, alternately getting up to nurse him or run to the toilet to barf or evacuate my bowels. It was horrid and foul, and he didn't catch it.
And, woman, what gorgeous photos! A new career, perhaps?
Knitting ... I did stay away from the raw fish, but I ate the other sushi a lot, and I think I managed to trick my cravings. I had the yam, oshinko, inari type rolls.
Sara/Seraf .... Scrumptious, lovely children! Send them up COD so that I can gobble them up!
Hey everyone! Man, I've been wanting to post on here for a long time, but between the constantly starving new baby and our crappy internet connection, it's been nearly impossible! Three times I've started to post and not been able to finish; we'll see how this goes. My partner is wearing Wylie in the Ergo (he now weighs over 7 pounds so we feel comfortable using that carrier; we both LOVE it!) and walking around the apartment reading a book, giving me a good opportunity to use the computer.
So sorry to hear about the sicknesses going around! UGH! We wash our hands obsessively over here, and try to keep sick people away from Wylie, but I know the inevitable will strike us one day too.. rest up and get well!
Desert, I'm sorry to hear about your crappy week. 14 hour days sound really hard. Here's to getting healthy soon and not having to work so damn much. Your pictures are ADORABLE. I'm impressed with your photography and with your DP's crocheting abilities.
KnittingTigers, I knew I wasn't supposed to, but I ate sushi when I was pregnant! In the first trimester! I felt reassured because my BFF, who has two kids, ate sushi in ABUNDANCE during both pregnancies, and both her children are amazingly perfect beings. She never got sick from the sushi place we always go to, so I indulged at the same trusted place and never had any problems. Around 18 weeks, after I had a little pregnancy scare (that ended up being a harmless cyst), I got a little nervous about it and decided to stop eating sushi. The concern is listeria, which could also happen from any other kind of food, and is quite rare.... so I say, go to a trusted place and ENJOY! But perhaps that is reckless advice that you shouldn't consider. ;) Also, CONGRATULATIONS! I am so excited for you guys!!!
Seraf, I love the pictures! So exciting about the talking and walking and skateboarding! It makes me excited for the days when we can put Wylie on a skateboard...and a bicycle...but for now we are happy with all the snuggling. I really love hearing about the goings on in your household. Sounds so fun!
Things over here are going well. Wylie is 4 weeks old tomorrow and is gaining weight rapidly. I am so proud. He eats a ton! And no longer fusses at my boob, which is a relief (that was SO frustrating!). I feel like ALL I am doing is feeding him. And of course it is the most important thing I can do right now, so I am glad to be able to do that. But man!!! It's a lot of breastfeeding!!! I never knew I would be spending THIS much time nursing the baby! He is amazing. He is a love! Some nights are hard, because he falls asleep nursing, but when we try to move him, he wakes up and needs to be coached back to sleep, which can take a loooong time. We figured out that we get the most sleep if we just let him sleep on one of our chests. He does not like to be set down, this guy. But even with our decision to just do that for the time being, he still woke up every 1-2 hours last night wanting to nurse and be rocked/bounced back to sleep. So we are both exhausted. The first 1-2 weeks, we would sleep for at least one stretch of 4-5 hours at a time, and I think we got spoiled and thought that's how he would be for a little bit longer. Not the case!
DP is going back to work tomorrow, after having this whole first month off with us. I feel really emotional about it. At the same time, I know we will be just fine, and we are blessed with an awesome community of friends and family who will come hang out with Wylie and I when we want/need it. It's just been such a special, amazing, once-in-a-lifetime experience to have the three of us home in this bubble of brand new first baby love, with gorgeous Seattle fall sunshine pouring in through our apartment windows every single day! I already look at Wylie and see how much bigger he is than when we was first born. And he's lost the long, soft peach fuzz that covered all of his cheeks the first couple weeks, too. I know he's barely a month old and still so tiny; I can't believe I look at him thinking about how fast he is growing! This parenthood thing...it sure is an amazing & emotional experience, right???
Take care everyone! Sending love to all of you. xoxo
Also, welcome Cordelia! Congratulations!!! My partner is also FTM and about to start hormone treatment this coming December. We're always excited to meet other genderqueer/trans families! So excited for you and your family. :)
Tigers, I ate the occasional raw fish (and eggs and cold cuts) and cooked fish sushi all through my last pregnancy.
Planet, before you know it he will be sleeping on his own. Our boys still nurse to sleep because neither of us wants to bounce them to sleep at night. They will grow out of it. They both still sleep best snuggled up with someone warm. In our house, the easiest way to lay a baby down is to nurse with them laying on the bed on their sides and then just roll away. We frequently put a pillow under their legs because they just don't sleep well on their backs. Every hour waking up is no fun at all.
Desert I agree go love your daughter !! She has lots if antibodies from the breast milk ... And hugs on long days
Hi everyone else
Afm... 14 weeks tomorrow start if the 2nd trimester !!!
I am having a hard time with walking much.. It's causing some breathing troubles:( I get easily winded ..
To top it off I had a full blown asthma attack at 5 am and now have deep congestion in my chest... Dr is having me rest and drink fluids and do breathing treatments.. If I keep a fever they want me in urgent care .... This is a bad time to get sick as its moving weekend ... Poor Dp has to do everything
Cananny: I'm sorry you are struggling with your back and with breathing. Asthma is scary any time, but especially during pregnancy. Hang in there, mama, and good luck with the move. I know it is hard, but it will be so great to get settled in to the place that will be your babies' first home.
Planet: He is adorable and beautiful, and I'm thrilled that he is gaining weight. I also found it shocking with the first baby that all I could do was nurse. I realized then that nursing a newborn is literally a full-time job. Hours and hours. I'm positive that Wylie will slow up, and then you'll wonder how you ever handled the constant nursing. Big pat on the back to you for giving him exactly what he needs right now. Lucky boy! Your family is beautiful, too, by the way. I'm sorry that DP has to go back to work. I'm sure that will be hard on all three of you, but I'm glad you've had your month of babymooning in the Seattle sunlight. No more fuzz! That made me tear up. It really does go quickly, and yes, the emotions are so very intense, especially at the beginning. Hugs to you!
Seraf: Your house sounds like a circus sometimes (wink--in the best possible way). I love the pics! Somehow I lost track of your blog address--would you please post or pm it? Yay for lost teeth, sounds/words for moms, and less sensitivity! How did you change the schedule? So glad that seems to be helping.
Isa: Ugh. More colds. Hang in there. Hope to see you three soon.
Mami: HI! Are you still lurking? We need to get together again! How are the kids? The babes?
Desert: Evie is exquisite! Love that dark hair! I'll agree with everyone else about cuddling and helping with the babe, even with a cold. Worse comes to worse, she gets it, and you'll handle it. But they both need you, and you need them! Work sounds seriously hard. What kind of lab do you work in? Do you bedshare? After long days at work (which I only have once/week, thankfully), I find sleeping next to L a great comfort (though she is rarely asleep when I get home at 9:30pm, having slept and woken up or having refused to sleep at all until the boob is available to accompany her to dreamland).
Knitting: I didn't eat raw fish sushi, just because I figured that if I did get sick, I'd hate myself. I ate other kinds of sushi--inari has always been a favorite--to quell the craving. I bet part of it is a salt craving. But I'm with the others--if you have a trusted place and you want it that bad, go for it!
Hi to everyone else!
AFU: My parents are visiting, which is really nice. They are getting a HUGE kick out of Lilah. Since L is their fourth granddaughter, I wasn't sure they'd be as delighted and entranced by her as they were by Z, who was their first, but sure enough they are. We went to the Museum of Science and Industry yesterday, and Lilah had the time of her life with some balls that hovered and danced in front of her on columns of air. When the ball would wiggle in the air, she'd imitate the ball by shimmying and shaking her head and torso in this crazy and zany way. I was in tears laughing. And Z is doing wonderfully--no apparent jealousy at all. She is into her own thing--drawing truly incredible pictures of animals with bright sharpie markers--and impresses her grandparents plenty in her own way. Starling--I keep meaning to get Z some cheap canvasses so she can make art for L's room. Thanks for the idea from the blog!
My big drama right now is that the woman who was collecting my donations of breastmilk to give to her niece has apparently been perpetuating a big fraud, collecting milk from multiple women and then misrepresenting it as her own, which she has then donated to multiple other local mamas. Somehow a few of the recipients figured this out, found each other, and confronted the woman, who admitted it. Now there is a secret facebook group where people are posting pics of milk bags, comparing dates, and trying to figure out which moms (and babies!) got which women's milk. If I were a recipient, I'd be FLOORED. As it is, I'm bewildered but not terribly upset. Local babies who needed donor milk got my milk, so it didn't go to waste. That's what feels most important to me. But the recipient moms are understandably really upset and even considering whether to press charges. This woman apparently was convicted of marriage fraud (being paid to marry an immigrant) several years back, so I guess she has a history of self-misrepresentation. But it is so odd--other than a few meals and cloth diapers from recipient moms, she didn't get anything material out of this, and she was driving all over the state collecting and donating milk.
Partner of 17 yrs to DP, Mommy to 10-yr-old Z , and Lilah Nyx, born 7/24/11 .
AmandaHope, what?! Why?!An attention thing?
It's awesome that your parents and kids are having such a great time.
Our house is a circus. Especially with the addition of the trampoline. The blog.
The schedule change. The kids' mama and I separated before Ari was 2. We lined up the week so I worked Mon, Tues and every other weekend while she had the kids and she worked while I had the kids Wed, Thurs, Fri and every other Sat. That worked really well for a long time but after Soren was born it began to feel like no one was settling in. The first day home everyone was scattered. The day they left everyone was scattered. The day or 2 in the middle were ok. So now I lined up my work to be Wed, Fri, Sun (14 hours), Mon, Tues, Mon (7 hours) on a 2 week schedule. The kids are with me Wednesday to wednesday and I work 1 7 hour shift while they're home and their mama works one day while they're with her. Now they don't feel as stressed about settling in and we all feel a lot calmer. My work schedule hasn't worked out perfectly like that yet, because there were some days I needed to fill in so last month had some hard times for Sara with the boys. I really think this month will be easier (I finally got my seniority back, they were grumpy with me for taking the rest of my maternity leave when Soren was born, they really didn't want me to take any time off).
CaNanny, good luck with the move.
Sorry not much time for lots of personals!
Welcome to everyone who recently joined this board.
Cananny- 2nd trimester already? You're moving right along!
Seraf/Sara- The kids are so big! Soren is growing and changing with every new pic you post! Glad that you found a schedule that is working. Shay is one in less than a month. What are your plans for his birthday?
Amanda- Yes, we are lurking as often as possible. We definitely need to get together soon. The kids are doing great! How are L and Z?
AFU:The little ones are getting big and doing more and more each day. L is on the move constantly. She is now walking and loves every opportunity she gets to show off her new skill. J is starting to move around more and is even sitting up on his own. N is doing well in school and continues to give us a run for our money. `He is having lots of potty issues as he has been refusing to go anywhere but in his diaper. A brought home her first progress report from middle school and has maintained a straight "A" average in all of her advanced classes. She has already attended her first school dance. ( We were probably the first parent's in the parking lot at pick-up time) Here are a few recent pics:
Me (29) in with DW (40)
DD (12) and DS our special needs baby (4) placed 03-01-10
Our furbaby Bella (Yorkie)
Layla Janae 11/22/11
Yes second trimester already !!! I'm happy to be in a new phase.. Though I still worry about them
Seraf... Love the photos! Hard to believe Shay is about to be a year old ! Time is flying
Our move went well ... Dp has been busting but to get things unpacked... Our friends put together the cribs so we can start putting everything away ... Their nursery is a room of cribs ! Another friend came to put a new dresser together for my clothes wohooooo !! Thankf for good friends !
In other news our baby shower is nov 10 th ... Due to me going to be on bed rest in December/Jan.. And babies will b here in febuary
I am still sick doing breathing treatments 4x a day and resting as much as possible !
Hi to everyone else
Mami ... ADORBABLE! Those kidlets of yours are lovely, lovely, lovely! Little L isn't so little any more! Where did the time go???
Amanda ... WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?! As a mama who gratefully received donated milk, I would be so worried that she tampered with it in some weird munschausen-by-proxy kind of way. Seriously, I would be so deeply disturbed. What on earth went through that woman's mind? I would definitely talk to the police. Imagine what she could get up to next? I am dead serious about worrying if it had been tampered with.
Seraf ... You new schedule sound way calmer. Right on!
CaNanny ... Did your neighbour stop burning that noxious stuff?
Hi to everyone else ... and welcome to the new residents on this board! You are in great company!
AFM: I'm back to work, and trying not to bring the chaos of a 12+ hour shift on an urban ambulance home to my family. I try not to talk about the Big Hairy Calls, especially not around the children. E already struggles with anxiety as it is.
We're buying a Westfalia so that we can get away more easily and more often from our lovely dyke housing co-op. While we love the community and the kids and the space and the rent, we are desperately craving alone time. Especially me. When I go to work I am ON all day long, and need quiet and solitude to recharge. Not happening. We're going to make a point of getting out of town and camping, year round. Just need to find a furnace! And a carbon monoxide detector.
We took E out of her music class because we decided that it was too schooly for a 3yr old and the parents were snooty snobs and I didn't want to stifle E's rampant love for music by making her sit in a circle and not ask questions out of turn and recite "dee-dee-da-da" over and over, PLUS they wanted us to pay $50 on top of the registration for a book and CD. We're going to hook her up with the local carnival band when she can stay up for their rehearsal times on Monday nights. She loves them!
And I wanted to mention to Cordelia ... this is a great and supportive and safe space for families with trans or genderqueer parents. A special welcome in that regard!
Seraf—shay on the skateboard is hilarious! And I love all of the contradictions you’ve got going on over there!
Desert—that sounds like an awful work environment to be in! I hope the new people are amazing and awesome and you can get some REST! Evie’s always so cute! I love her bright little expressions and I especially love the crocheted flowerlets!
Knitting—I had the cooked kind and the vegetarian kind, but otherwise abstained. That and runny eggs were the only two things I managed to keep away from (but I made up for it in nitrate-laden meat products and alcohol and god knows what else, in small amounts). I figured that if eating spinach and tomatoes can give you salmonella, there really is no way to be completely safe, so do whatever feels prudent.
Planet—oh my goodness you are just the cutest family ever ever ever! Does it hurt to be so adorable? Only sort of kidding. I hope you’re having a good day today—the first one was the hardest for both of us, for sure!
Cananny—I’m so sorry to hear about the breathing troubles. I HATE that feeling, and it’s only worse in the fall when people think burning leaves is a good idea. Wrong. I hope you find a good solution soon!
Ahope—that is totally bizarre. I wonder what the impetus was? Are you able to be in touch with the woman whose baby was using your milk directly, or are you done donating now? We hope to see you all soon, too! Between family things and these endless colds I’m feeling like we never get to do anything fun anymore. Boo. Hopefully we’ll sort out something soon!
Mami—Glad they’re all doing well! I can’t believe L’s walking already! I remember when you first put up her little picture! And I’m bummed that we’re going to miss safariland—we seriously had to talk ourselves out of going there before Edie was born because we were afraid it would be creepy for a couple adults with no kids to go in.
Starling—three seems a little young for super-structured classes, I agree. How does the coop work? I need to go read your blog—it sounds interesting, but stressful! I miss our friends living downstairs. It was the perfect mix of friends to see whenever we were in the mood and no shared kitchen/bathroom spaces, but we were particularly good about giving each other space. Our new tenants are very nice, but it’s not the same as having almost-family down there.
AFM—nothing but still sick! Oh! And I finally made Edie’s Halloween costume yesterday. She and I are going to be fish, and DP will be a fisherman. I think I went overboard on the shiny scales, to tell the truth. I just got all excited about shimmery fabric. Oh well.
And so are the boys!
Hi, Lise. I have no experience with this, but the folks who I've known (here and elsewhere) who have successfully induced all used the standard protocol (birth control plus the appropriate drug--forgetting the name). Hope others are more helpful.
Partner of 17 yrs to DP, Mommy to 10-yr-old Z , and Lilah Nyx, born 7/24/11 .
mami, your kiddos are so adorable!
starling, we'll be putting DPs westie on the road again next spring - we should plan a westie road trip! And you should totally try Music Together - it's super fun and Mimi, the instructor at Britannia is awesome (our favourite!).
A (not really) parenting update for me, we still haven't put in our application for adoption. I'm not really sure why we are dragging out heels. It's not out of desire for another child for sure...I still think we're mourning not having another on our own....or maybe it's something else. It's confusing to me!
We're off to Fort Lauderdale, Miami and the Keys on Oct. 27. I've heard that Key West isn't terribly kid-friendly...in fact, when I looked at some places to stay they actually have a no children policy! Are we crazy to go there?
carmen ... We love Key West! Haven't been since having kids, mind you, but everything we have done and enjoyed there would easily be done with kids. It's such a funky, quirky place. S will love the chickens roaming around!
I remember you saying you had been there but wasn't sure if it was pre kiddos. We don't usually avoid places to travel to just because they aren't over the top kid places (Disneyland ;) ) - we've taken DD to Philadelphia, NYC, Vegas...not usually touted as kid places but we found fun :) However, I was a bit afraid that Key West would just be full of obnoxious weaving, falling down drunks!
And so are the boys!
When I was a kid growing up in Toronto, my parents took us to Florida every year for March break (they were teachers), and I have the best memories of Key West! And all of Florida, really... My parents were more the type to take us to an old houses instead of kid-oriented attractions, but I loved the trees and birds and seashells and animals and weather, so different from home. My sister and I would spend hours and hours stalking geckos or drawing on seashells. Have a great trip!
Does anyone know of any inclusive books for preschoolers about expecting or getting a new baby at their house? The stuff I found at the bookstore/library was all SO heteronormative that I'm not comfortable using them.
Two moms and two boys enjoying the truth that love always wins!!!
Wishin ... Sigh. The selection sucks. My DP is genderqueer, so we often just said 'she' in place of 'he,' or 'baba' in place of 'daddy' or 'papa' and our first was none the wiser. Funny thing: if a book had a male parent with a beard, we usually kept the male pronoun, but if the male parent didn't have a full-on beard, we used a female pronoun, because dp looks so dad-ish anyway. So, in a sense, it was easier for us from the genderqueer perspective.
This one features just a mama in the story, which is a little different. It was E's favourite, I think for some of the wonky things the sibling gets up to with his imaginary baby.
And this one is just so lovely and warm and features a homebirth, I think everyone should read it, heteronormative or not. E loved this one too. Perhaps even more than the other one. And the illustrations are by Julie Vivas, whose work I adore.
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