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Old 11-25-2013, 01:57 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks, granite, I really like my sleep.

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Old 11-25-2013, 03:54 PM
 
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Oh I have to check in more often! So many posts to catch up on! smile.gif

Those of you dealing with PPD, good for you for reaching out and getting help! I have bipolar disorder, and am really thankful I'm not having severe ppd, but it's the time of year I struggle a lot with mood swings and especially depression. I'm definitely dealing with having disturbing thoughts and anxieties about awful potential "worst nightmare" situations. But I have been practicing meditation and mindfulness and grounding techniques that have really helped.

About cosleeping while side-lying nursing: I never swaddled, but amadora is always right next to me so she didn't startle herself awake bc when she was that young and did starle, she was always against my body with my arm around her. Sort of swaddled by mama. As for pets, they were kicked out of our room at night until Amadora was strong enough to turn her head I'm case they were laying too close, just as a precaution in case of suffocation, but it also helped that by the time we let them in the room, we knew how they each react to her. Now our dog and cat sleep in bed with dw and dd and I. The dog sleeps down by dw's feet bc he gets touchy if he's startled awake sometimes. The cat is great, only sometimes I have to stop her from stepping on Amadora so she won't wake her up. Ama can pull her fur and she won't even react. The dog we have to be more careful about.

I got Amadora an amber teething necklace, and she is having fun experimenting with eating food a little bit. So far squash and avocado, but she isn't eating regularly yet.


Pets while cosleeping

I've been with DW , DD1(16), & DD2(12) since '09. Naturally birthed DD3 6/21/13. . Family of five females! LOVE makes a family.
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Old 11-25-2013, 06:42 PM
 
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Love it, Seraf! I missed yr instructional photos!

Queer parent on the adventure of a lifetime raising my sweet little guy, born at home in September 2012, with the love of my life by my side!
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Old 11-26-2013, 02:55 PM
 
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Hey just wanted to see if anyone has some ideas for names for parents to be called still trying to come up with ideas for have our baby to call us
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Old 11-26-2013, 03:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My kids have a mama and a baba.

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Old 11-26-2013, 05:43 PM
 
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Any tired and true tricks for a bad bad diaper rash caused.by excessive pooping from teething ? We've tried everything , every cream every oatmeal bath air time fungal cream cornstarch , Finn is so un happy his bum is raw and blistered ....

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Old 11-26-2013, 06:15 PM
 
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Sorry to crash but Cananny have you tried bag balm? I used to nanny back in the day and it was the only thing that worked for the little guy when he got blisters. We used to also let him go diaper free as much as possible to let it breathe. 


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Old 11-26-2013, 08:28 PM
 
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Hi, @new n young, welcome! We have a thread on parent name ideas here, which you may find helpful:
http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1384659/suggestions-on-what-the-kid-s-should-call-us#post_17477350

Sorry, @Cananny, I don't have any specific advice... But I can attest to bag balm as being great on my own chapped hands.

I'm jealous that your dog stays at the end of the bed, @CocoBird... Mine is more of a head-on-pillow type :P

We dropped by our midwifery clinic today to weigh Z, and though we didn't speak to a midwife at the time, she left a message later in the afternoon: Turns out Z isn't gaining weight fast enough. I still haven't talked with her so i don't know what the full story is, and am trying not to worry. He was 9 lbs 4 oz at birth, then went down to 9 lbs, and now at 12 days of age, is 9 lbs 2 oz.

Still, everything else has been going so well! And he seems fine, though he does have a noticeably tight frenulum... Despite this, breastfeeding hasn't been a problem at all. It's possible that he not getting as much milk as he should, I suppose. Sigh. I guess we'll find out tomorrow.

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Old 11-26-2013, 08:36 PM
 
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Annnnnd some pics, of our boy at 11 days old:






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Old 11-26-2013, 09:26 PM
 
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@granite having read a great deal about weight gain when I brought home a 4lb and 5 lb baby with serious breastfeeding challenges, that doesn't seem worrisome to me. Your midwife probably wants to make sure the bf-ing is going ok, see if your milk came in, make sure he's eating frequently enough and making enough wet diapers. But from my experience, it is worrisome if they don't gain their birth weight back by 2 or 3 weeks, and he certainly seems on track to do that. Do you feel like breast feeding is going ok? Are you monitoring his output, so to speak? He's a lovely baby. You did a fantastic job growing him!

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Old 11-26-2013, 10:03 PM
 
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So cute!  I love those newborn facial expressions!  I thought they expect them to be back at birth weight by 2 weeks too, so it sounds like you are very close.  I hope all is well.




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Old 11-26-2013, 10:58 PM
 
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W was 8lbs 7oz at birth, and 8lbs 6oz at two weeks, and there were no concerns about weight gain. I agree with m&m, they probably just want to be extra careful and check your diaper counts, etc. Love the pics!

My wife (30) and I (32) have been legally married since 2006. We are proud queer mamas to baby W, born 10/10/2013.
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Old 11-27-2013, 07:52 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Sphinxy, that doesn't sound worries one to me, either. S was a 9 pounder and dropped to 8-4 the first week and then gained an average of a pound a week for the next 12 weeks before slowing to half a pound a week for a while to be a 27 pound one year old.

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Old 11-27-2013, 12:22 PM
 
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they said in the hospital that losing up to 10% of their body weight was OK in the time before mom's milk comes in. more than that is worrisome. and then, of course, they gain it back as they get better at breastfeeding. keep us posted, granite. do you have access to a baby scale you could use on your own to assuage any concerns you have? we got a hand me down scale and it has been wonderful (for my anxiety) to see the boys gain their textbook number of ounces every week. 


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Old 11-27-2013, 12:53 PM
 
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Thanks so much, all! I'm so glad to have you to talk me down from my anxiety...

I hadn't been writing down his nursing or "outputs", which made it harder to answer the midwife's questions... I mean, he nurses like all the time & goes through at least 10 diapers a day, half of which are poops, which seems totally healthy & normal. I started keeping track now, though, including which side I nurse on & for how long.

I heard back from the midwife & we're going in tomorrow for another weighing & an exam. She said they want to see at least 1/2 oz of gain a day at this age. The clinic is literally 3 blocks from my house, so I could bring him in daily for weighing... And I might!

A different midwife on the team told me a few days ago that sometimes babies who start out big & don't lose much to start with, just don't gain weight very easily at the beginning. I'm liking this theory right now!

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Old 11-27-2013, 09:10 PM
 
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Granite,
I have a little piece of paper from back when E was born, with maniacally tiny writing recording all the friggin' weigh-ins, due to her 14% weight loss after birth and being so tiny to being with. Cue the onslaught of feeding/gaining struggles.
Epically long, tedious story made short, so long as you've got healthy output and baby is meeting milestones and isn't lethargic, then carry on, Mama!
You, my dear, are doing AWESOME! thumb.gif

dust.gifFour-eyed tattooed fairy godmother queer, mama to my lucky star (5) and little bird (2.5). Resident storyteller at www.thestoryforest.com. Enchanting audiostories for curious kids. Come play in the forest!
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Old 11-27-2013, 09:11 PM
 
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Oh man, keeping those "diaries" were my life's work for the first 4 weeks. To this day, I keep an app on my phone so I know which twin nursed which side how long ago. (I switched to the app after the paper diaries) There's just too much to remember with the sleep deprivation. It's interesting that they didn't suggest you keep track of that, but they still asked you about it. You're a first time mom, you should get a lil more guidance and support. There are a lot of good templates online you can print or useas inspiration to design your own. I would say that weighing him every day might have an overall negative effect on your life, though. They have big days and slow days, they gain and lose through the day as they pee and poop. I think once a week would be plenty to tell you that he's moving in the right direction unless the midwife is really worried about him. Don't drive yourself crazy, just be aware of what's going on with him. How often and how long and what side he eats & how many diapers he produces are all important info. What you are describing sounds very much within the (wide) range of normal.

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Old 11-27-2013, 09:13 PM
 
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And why yes, that is a shiny new avatar over there. So glad you noticed. winky.gif
For those of you who have been following along, my audio story site is live as of today!
The Story Forest is offering quality audio stories for kids, with plenty of queer family inclusion! One of our main character has a Mom and a Mama!
Come check us out.
End of shameless plug.
We now return to our regular programming.
As you were, folks.
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Old 11-27-2013, 10:25 PM
 
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I *did* notice the new avatar, starling&diesel! Congrats on getting this project off the ground, it's so exciting!

Ha, I'm glad I'm not the only one who has kept notes on a newborn's inputs/outputs...! And DP just said to me like a minute ago that there's got to be an app... Glad to know there is, @mrsandmrs; I'll go look shortly. Yes, it is weird that no one suggested tracking this data from the beginning... It certainly didn't occur to me to do it.

Of course, today turned into an incredible day of marathon nursing, with Z only taking a couple of 45 minute naps in the past 12 hours. Huh... Maybe he knows he's on a deadline to pack it on!

Thanks again, y'all... I'm feeling a lot more calm. I'm glad to know your kids have thrived, despite being smaller or losing more than Z did at the start! I think my midwives are just being conservative, which I'll do my best to appreciate.

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Old 11-27-2013, 11:08 PM
 
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@granite we've been using an app called First Year since the day W came home and we love it.

My wife (30) and I (32) have been legally married since 2006. We are proud queer mamas to baby W, born 10/10/2013.
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Old 11-27-2013, 11:23 PM
 
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@Sphinxy, thank you! I'll check it out... I just downloaded "iBaby" and started playing around with it, because it was the first one that came up; it's okay, I guess, but I'm glad to have your recommendation for a different one.


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Old 11-28-2013, 12:32 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by granite View Post

I *did* notice the new avatar, starling&diesel! I think my midwives are just being conservative, which I'll do my best to appreciate.

HI again, Granite ... Needs mentioning that in BC midwives practice under very strict protocols since the regulation of the 'industry' happened.
Since then, it's not uncommon to hear the term 'medwives' in reference to BC midwives. They really do practice under the umbrella of imposed medical protocols ... well, perhaps not imposed, but certainly conservative, indeed.
You can find their protocols on line (here, at the college of midwifery site connected to the school at UBC), and can see exactly where in their algorithms they are legally obliged to require intervention and/or deferral to an OB or Ped.
In our case, the acceptable limit of post birth weight loss was 11% (if I recall correctly), so because we were at 14% with E, we were referred to a pediatrician, whether or not we agreed.
Unless you have a lay midwife (ie. Gloria Lemay) who practices outside the restrictions of the CMBC (and is then 'rogue' for lack of a better term and won't have hospital privileges or referral capabilities), there isn't a whole lot about BC midwives that isn't somewhat conservative, when it comes to the traditional craft -- if you will -- of midwifery.

All that to say, if you end up with a referral for whatever reason (jaundice, FTT, etc), know that your midwives will likely be as supportive as they can, despite their hands being tied. Which is why -- i think -- they work hard to keep mamas and babies within their protocols. To avoid gratuitous referrals to mainstream medical practitioners. Go, BC midwives!

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Old 11-29-2013, 12:36 AM
 
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@new n young, we are Mommy and Mama. :)

 

@Cananny, we have some diaper-free time to help dry off if there is a diaper rash issue, and use a calendula balm that has worked really quickly for us. We used it under her neck roll, too, when that got red and irritated.

 

@granite, what a cute little dear! I honestly never tracked nursings or dirty diapers much. They seemed constant. Baby girl was clearly healthy. Glad you aren't stressing over it too much. I also liked weighing Ama a lot when she was brand new! I weighed her as often as possible :)


I've been with DW , DD1(16), & DD2(12) since '09. Naturally birthed DD3 6/21/13. . Family of five females! LOVE makes a family.
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Old 11-29-2013, 11:46 AM
 
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@new n young --We are Mommy and Momma, not terribly unique.

@granite -- They gave us a booklet to track everything for the fist two weeks. When we went to his 2-week appointment, everything was fine and the ped didn't ask to see the records so I stopped tracking. I didn't have a smartphone then so I was doing it all on paper. Now I just track weight and other measurements. I do have a baby scale that we have used. I bought it for my cat when he was trying to lose weight. smile.gif Works great for babies too, but not necessary. Visiting your midwife for weigh-ins could be a fun little outing.

AFU-As of yesterday, C is all about fake coughing and blowing raspberries. We tried giving him some mashed potatoes yesterday, but he totally ignored them. He was a little tired by the time dinner rolled around. I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving (here in the US). Happy First Thanksgiving to the new babies!



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Old 11-30-2013, 10:04 AM
 
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Thanks smile.gif
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Old 11-30-2013, 01:43 PM
 
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How is Z doing, granite? 


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Old 12-01-2013, 04:41 PM
 
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How is Z doing, granite? 

Thanks for checking in, @carmen358... Z only gained 1/2 oz between his midwife visits last Tuesday & Thursday, which left him still below birth weight at 2 weeks old. So, as instructed, we rented a pump & began topping up his feeds with expressed milk & formula, via a catheter taped to my breast. 24 hours later, he'd gained another 1/2 oz, which is good but still not as rapid as they want. I'm also now taking fenugreek & blessed thistle, and eating more fat, in case my supply is the issue. We've got an appointment tomorrow with the local paediatrician who specializes in breastfeeding issues, which is a relief.

Still, I feel awful & frustrated & sad. The midwife looked at my input/output diary, and noted that he's spending waaaaay too much time at the breast & not enough sleeping during the day. I thought babies just nursed constantly! But apparently not to this degree? I'm hoping it's the tongue tie... Please let it just be the tongue tie...

Things aren't all bad. I'm so thankful DP's off work (& will be until the new year), and we have been getting out of the house in the evenings and between (marathon) feeding sessions. Nights are also still going well, so at least I'm not terribly sleep deprived.

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Old 12-01-2013, 06:45 PM
 
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A quick update: We just had Z at the midwifery clinic for another weighing, and he gained 4 ounces in the past 48 hours!! So, regardless of my own feelings about wanting him to be exclusively breastfed instead of supplementing with formula, it's fantastic to know he can & will gain weight... I'm feeling a million times better now :-)

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Old 12-01-2013, 09:01 PM
 
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Granite, does he definitely have a tongue tie? It's great that he put on some weight to alleviate some of your stress. Are you able to get much when you pump? If you are pumping regularly, you will stimulate your boobs and increase your supply. Fenugreek, oatmeal, and mothers milk tea can all help. I know plenty of babies that had formula supplements in the beginning and went on to eat only breastmilk later when the supply caught up. I empathize so much. I had a lot of breastfeeding challenges early on, and spent so much time worrying about their weight gain. I wish I had spent more time reading about bf-ing instead of birth, and wishing I'd taken more than 1 breastfeeding class. It can be really tough in the early days, but if you are persistent & patient and have good support, most breastfeeding issues are totally fixable. hugs.

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Old 12-01-2013, 09:03 PM
 
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And dark beer!

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