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-   -   Queer Conceptions: June 2013 (http://www.mothering.com/forum/235-queer-parenting/1384342-queer-conceptions-june-2013-a.html)

friederike 05-31-2013 05:37 AM

June, the month of the summer solstice, is a perfect month to bring a new life into the world.  While June marks the end of spring and most new beginnings, it also marks the beginning of summer when life flourishes.


Please put your updates in BOLD.

GRADUATES: Please click here to share how you got your BFP!


Waiting to O whistling.gif

Friederike
Prettyisa
mamaetmaman
Lovestreet13
JustAnotherJenny blogging.jpg
Lizbian
fillefantome BFPChart2.gif



Waiting to Know... Braving the 2ww fingersx.gif

BByH1Pr
jwaite05
heart-n-bones



Taking a Break/Figuring Things Out/Waiting to be ready wool.gif

pookafaye
redrockband
lea2012
SanDiego78
DarcySD
Fmorris28 BFPChart2.gif
KWPX2 BFPChart2.gif
Twomommyfamily
TineyDreams
Scorpioma BFPChart2.gif
Rs11
Darthtunaqueen
TillyBarry



chicken3.gif2013 Graduates! chicken3.gif
May *Lovingisliving joy.gif
March * Escher joy.gif * Sotohana joy.gif * Amt1015 joy.gif
February * Granite joy.gif
January * Esenbee2 joy.gif * LindseyW joy.gif * Sphinxy joy.gif


2012 Graduates!

December * Joyseattle * Mrsandmrs & Bigfoot
October * Cordelia15 * PokeyAC * Easttowest * ErinTNgirl * Outdoorsy
September * Wishin'&hopin' * Lisedea * Tandy401
August *Thenewzero * KnittingTigers * TaraL
July * Cananny
May * Mtnlisa
April * Nosreves
March * SkyandTru * JuneBug
February * MidwifeStephPDX * SouthernBelle24
January * Planet * Dandylez

2011 Graduates!

December * DesertSunsets
November * Aljm41910
October * Vienna79 * KSDoulaMama * Pleasantlyfurious * SwtRainbowBrite * Go_Vegan
September * Smilingsara * Ad Astra * Mumquest
August * Prettyisa
July * Onemommyonemama * Southern Fried Karma
June * CrystalPerez * Qmama42
May * KellySF
April * Want2bmumx2 * Indigoscot
March * Graceie * Seraf * 2ezforyou * Mommy55
February * Escher * SharriKitColorado * DAWNMP1
January * Starling&diesel

2010 Graduates!

November * Mizyellow * AmyPDX * AmandaHope * Cejae
September * Solejean * Painefaria
August * Bttrflygypsy * 2happymamas * LibraryLady
July * Beastie * Gumshoegirl007 * Wehrli
June * Coco
May * Burg * Korey
April * Calimeow * Mtnlisa * Kimlyn32
February * Mistral * Quasar & Smartycat * Monarchgrrl * Erthe_mama
January * Lyndzies * FtMpapa

2009 Graduates!

December* Osker * Megan sacha * Mkpgoddess
October * JJNoho * Mommies 2 Be * Megincl & Ktcl
September * Elismum1908 * KSDoulaMama * Pleasantlyfurious
August * Chicagoml * Wishin'&hopin'
July * Hbog
May * Indigoscot
April * Kelmendi * KJM * Whoabethy * Carmen
March * Scalpel * Katwomyn4
February * Deny_zoo29
January * Jodybird511

friederike 06-01-2013 03:16 AM

fmorris- you had me lol at the reality show donor screening. "One day you're in, next day you're out". Good luck finding the right guy. I like that one was so understanding about last minute donations, it shows that he realizes the tricky party of babymaking.

redrock - we have pride this weekend too and I am also not going. It is embarassing, because I am a volunteer at the LGBT youth center here and everyone is coming, but we have pouring rain and I just got over a nasty cold so I really dpn't feel like it. Maybe next year, as part of the family group with my own little one? A girl can hope.

Liz - I saved your story and will read it tonight. About your fav donor, is it possible that the quota changed because you're now treated on Denmark as opposed to the UK? I know that they have this complicated system with different quotas and according where you're from and where they treat you?

JustAnotherJenny 06-01-2013 06:03 AM

Friederike: Thanks for the shiny new thread!  :-) Happy June!


jwaite05 06-01-2013 06:22 AM

Happy June Everyone!

 

Frederike, thank you for monitoring again, and setting up the new thread!  Your support in this circle of women is comforting and remarkable...goes for everyone here really!!  So THANKS LADIES!!

 

BBy, my fingers and toes are crossed for you during this TWW!  Keep yourself distracted and positive:)

 

fmorris, I, too, was giggling about the reality show!  DW and I have said the same thing!!  It's hilarious to recount the process with each other and our close friends.  After our first KD wasn't working out, I started using websites to find another who was closer to where we lived, and WHEW!  WEIRD!!  I wasn't comfortable with most of the ones that responded...I finally found one that I really resonated with,   But he was on the other side of the continent, so we were back to the drawing board.  I continued to hold a high intention for the right donor, and then remembered that a friend of mine knows a gent that had helped another couple with fresh swimmers who is here, in my hometown!  I asked, he said yes.  We all met a couple of times, and now here we are:)  Divine work<3

I am sure that you guys will choose the perfect match!

 

redrock, I hope you have a nice weekend with your sis!  I know how frustrating it is to not know what to do to help your body along or to monitor this process.  It IS a bit of a guessing game if you aren't being monitored by a Fert. Spec..  I haven't used Clearblue Monitor, but the reviews online sounds positive.  I don't know anything about the strips tho'.  Sorry.  I DO like being able to insem at home.  It really does make the whole process feel more natural.  And it's nice to be able to lay in your own bed:))

 

ASM, I finally O'd on Thursday.  Our last insem (of 4 this time:)) was on Tues evening.  I am so hoping that this is the one!  My temp has climbed up and up Fri and Sat mornings, which I was glad to see.  Now I am trying hard not to drink more than one cup of coffee...and not to tire myself out too much during the day.  It will be a challenge this weekend tho' -- my inlaws will be at my house next week, so I have lots of cleaning and yard work to accomplish before their arrival.  With O not til Thursday, I shouldn't be testing til the 12th or 13th of this month.  That seems like a long time awaycandle.gif  But I am doing all that I can to stay positive and hope I conceive and healthy little one.  

 

Liz, thanks for the link to your book...looking forward to reading it!

 

Happy and positive thoughts to all!!


fmorris28 06-01-2013 08:00 AM

Redrock, Thanks. Boy, do you need it lol. It can easily get overwhelming. Good luck with your search!

 

Friederike, Lol There are many times I've thought to myself.."You're fired". :) I think lesbian babymaking is tricky enough without all the extra twists and turns! I'm just hoping we'll figure it out asap. Then I can stop feeling like a university athletic recruiter. We only want the strongest, fastest, and best looking lol!

 

Jwaite, lol You've gotta find some humor in this don't ya? I COMPLETELY agree on the weird factor on looking for KD's locally online. There were numerous ones I just got a weird vibe from. Glad your search proved successful, I'm keeping my FX for the same great kind of luck. And thanks for the well wishes! I hope that this cycle proves a winner for you. Good luck in your TWW.

 

AFM, Well it's official, mye birthday will be ringing in in 27 days. All I want for my birthday is a + pregnancy test! I'm hoping we'll give it a go this month. DP and I are in discussion. Can't believe it's already June. Time is going by so quickly..my twin nieces are one (as of may 22) and my sister is pregnant with her 4th (due in nov.)…SIGH. Mye time is coming..keeping to the tune of a positive song.

 


lovestreet13 06-01-2013 06:22 PM

Greetings to everyone!  I'm actually IN this month, after lurking for a few months, and after a long stretch of months with no trying.  Please move me to Waiting to O!

 

It will probably take me a minute to catch up on all the new "faces" and I hope I can be supportive and helpful on your journeys. 

 

Friederike: Thank you for starting the new thread and for moderating!  And I hope that you do have a little one with you next year at Pride.  stillheart.gif

 

JustAnotherJenny: Someone familiar!  Sorry you're still working on this, but I'm glad to see you.

 

Jwaite05: Best of luck to you on the TWW!!  It is just torturous.  At least that's how I felt about it-- it's like you try not to get your hopes up, but the whole time you have to behave and act as if you are pregnant!  I hope it goes quickly and happily for you.

 

Fmorris28:  I hope your month goes well, too, and that you get to give it a go!

 

AFM:  Last May, we had joined the "club" at our local cryobank to get the first peeks at new donors and also to take advantage of their Buy 5 Get 1 free offer.  Well, now it's 1 year later, and the cryobank was kind enough to give me a call two weeks ago to remind me the membership was expiring and ask if I wanted to re-join.  Last year, we bought 5 vials.  Which meant we still had 1 coming for free, which we needed to order before May ended.  And then either pay for storage for it, or pick it up and f-ing go for it!  We chose option #2, despite not being fully prepared.

Last year when we were trying, I was mostly at a different job and my insurance covered insemination.  Not fully, of course, so after 3 months and 5 inseminations, we were still left with probably $4000 in bills, plus paying off the sperm.  So our "break" started when my insurance changed and we needed to shift to home insems, but it lasted so long (Sept-now) because of all those bills.  We're still not quite caught up, but we're really tired of waiting.

 

DP picked up our free vial yesterday, and I need to get prepped within the next 2 weeks for an at-home insem.  I'm excited, not very optimistic that we'll be successful, but I'm ready to be back in the game. 

 

On a super positive note, our state, Minnesota, just legalized gay marriage a couple weeks ago.  In 5 days, couples can start picking up marriage licenses, and on August 1st, can start marrying legally.  DP and I are just in shock and so happy about this.  We've never planned anything much for ourselves for a wedding, because we wanted a legal marriage and it seemed like that would be really far off.  So, the really amazing thing will be that when we finally do have a child, we should be able to put both of our names on the birth certificate, and DP won't have to go through the whole hassle and cost of a second-parent adoption!!  We're really stoked about that -- the safety and security that will come from legally being a family in the state where we live.

 

And I thought you all would enjoy the picture below...  DP picked up our tank when I was at work, and sent me this pic, saying "Sperms all buckled in."   ROTFLMAO.gif

 


wishin'&hopin' 06-02-2013 04:49 AM

Lovestreet--I'm in MN too :)  As for second parent adoptions--the general consensus that I've heard is that EVEN if you can have both moms/dads on birth certificate, a 2nd parent adoption is still advised (for travel to other states/countries and because of doma).  Our 2nd parent adoption fees will be running around 2000 (2 kids) and home study is waived.  Good luck this month!!!


jwaite05 06-02-2013 07:18 AM

HI Lovestreet and wishin'~   Welcome Back!  Glad you are giving it another try, Lovestreet!  I feel ya on the $$ and the TWW!!  We tried with frozen swimmers twice two years ago, at home.  IT was CRAZY how much it cost...plus we had to have them shipped in that crazy alien looking container, which added another $200 to the cost of the vile.  We could only swing one vile per insem, and I wasn't convinced that I had timing right with either.  Nerve racking and quite sad when we got those BFNs because we weren't sure when we were going to be able to afford more swimmers.  So this time around we are choosing to go with fresh swimmers and are hoping this will increase our chances.  It's already made it easier, logistically, because we don't have to worry about whether the frozen will stay good until I O.  I am keeping high hopes for you guys!!  You never know what the body will do!!  Maybe this is your month:))

 

I am at 3DPO and trying not to drink much caffeine.  That is one of the hardest parts for me.  My temp is staying up tho'...which I was a bit concerned about.  I have an unpredictable luteal phase, I think...I haven't always tracked BBT consistently, but from O to AF, it averages 11 days, sometimes shorter, sometimes longer.  I wasn't paying as close attention to BBT because it wasn't necessarily helping to predict O, but now I think it's important to that I am sure it happened and I can tell whether my progesterone levels have stayed where they are supposed to.  With my age factor (39), I just want to be sure.  If this cycle doesn't take, I am going to start taking some xtra zinc, chasteberry (to help balance estrogen and progesterone), and eating less soy/more sweet potatoes, nuts, and avocado.  All are supposed to help with this balancing act.  And continuing acupuncture, as well.  Minimizing stress is another struggle for me, so DW and I are very aware of this and trying to put all the supports in place for me to stay grounded.  My job is coo coo and our lives are busy, so that is a huge piece for me to pay attention to.  Mediation and yoga need to be squeezed into this equation somewhere!  Everything I read, and my acupuncturist are telling me to reduce stress!  I'm tryingSheepish.gif  And all of you listening and supporting are helping with this part!!blowkiss.gif


mamaetmaman 06-02-2013 11:46 AM

Hello again everyone!

Happy June smile.gif

Jwaite good luck on your 2WW! I find reducing my caffeine intake to be a great challenge as well. Last cycle I cut it out completely and I think that that stressed me out too much. This time, I'm just going to reduce. I have slight stress/anxiety issues too, so weighing the pros/cons, caffeine stays.

Friederike I have stopped attending Pride events as well. We live a bit out of the city and certainly don't drink like we used to. It would be totally different as a family with little ones.


So I've been on the femara for 4 days now. I'm on the lowest dose and holy moly am I experiencing hot flashes! I go in on Tues for BW and U/S, to see how the follies are developing. So I'm still waiting and letting them do their thing.

I've been a bit pissed off lately at the cost of TTC as lesbians. The clinic we're at is charging an additional 1300 to do an IUI, which is supposed to be covered by our provincial health plan! They also insist on ordering the sperm for us (presumably for an additional administrative fee). I argued with them last week because I would rather order on my own. They said there would be an "receiving" fee when the sperm arrives. Dang. It was much cheaper to do it at home!

We figure if we don't get preggers this round or next round with the RE doing the medicated IUI, we may go back to doing it at home. Grrrr....

JustAnotherJenny 06-02-2013 12:52 PM

Sigh. I wrote a post with personals and something ate it.  No time to repeat right now, but FRIEDERIKE would you please move me to braving the tww?   1dpo.


lovingisliving 06-02-2013 01:16 PM

Hello ladies!!!  

 

SO much to catch up on!  I have been lurking on and off and wanted to share my story, as of the last few months.  I believe the last thing I had updated you all on was that I was in my TWW during February.  Well as you may imagine, that didn't end with a BFP.  

 

After seeing my RE since October 2012 and February was our 5th try to conceive, the RE shook my world when he said we needed to go in and check out the endometriosis that I'd been diagnosed with nearly 9 years ago.  As you can imagine my confidence, motivation, and pep went right out the window.  So I retracted from interacting with most people, including on here.  Surgery was scheduled for April 5th.  They found, and removed, endometriosis from both ovaries, upper vagina, and lower bladder.  Whew!  A couple weeks after surgery I had my first period and was in shock that there was no pain accompanied with it.  This was new to me!  After so many years struggling with such painful periods I couldn't believe that it could be gone in an instant.  The plan was to start Clomid and inseminate with my next cycle.  My Clomid cycle ended May 4th and in honor of Cinco de Mayo we ordered a vial of our Mexican swimmers ROTFLMAO.gifto be shipped to the RE.  I went in for an ultrasound on the 9th to check the follicles.  At that time I had two very mature follies in the right ovary, they measured 17.5 and 19...with my uterine lining at 13.5.  I had no side effects from the Clomid, thank goodness!  The following afternoon I surged!!  It all happened so quickly.  On Saturday, the 11th, we went in for insemination.  Mother's Day weekend.  Then began the two week wait...  This wait was probably the longest.  I was feeling very low, sure I wouldn't conceive, and mentally preparing myself to give up.  The second week of the TWW I felt awfull!  Swore I was either sick or going crazy.  I'd wake up and run to the bathroom, not to vomit, and throughout day had awful stomach ache/cramping.  The cramping convinced me that my period was on her way.  On May 25th, day 14 since insem, I went in for my HCG blood draw.  Ended up calling out sick from work that day because I couldn't keep myself out of the bathroom and was preparing myself for the worst.  Typically I would hear from the nurse by 1 or 2pm...by that time I'd heard nothing, so I figured I was out.  DP came home to check on me and brought me a cheeseburger (which I was craving).  As soon as I took my first bite the phone rang.  It was the nurse.  I immediately started shaking.  The results were in and...I am PREGNANT!  She mentioned my HCG levels being in the 350's...I can't remember exactly what she said because my mind went blank as soon as she said congratulations.  Hung up the phone, grabbed DP and cried my little eyes out.  Went in for another blood draw three days later and my levels had tripled!  I don't know what to do with myself, I'm still in shock.  I've had days that I wake up paranoid and in such disbelief that I'm in a funk for the whole day.  Luckily, DP is good about bringing me back to reality and cheering me up.  I will return for more blood work this Tuesday and pray that the numbers are still rising.  The following week we will go in for our first ultrasound to meet our little bundle(s).  I can hardly stand the anticipation!  

 

I hope that my journey brings some encouragement to those of you still trying!  Don't give up.  I'll be sure to keep you all updated on how things progress.  Sending you all good vibes!


lizbian 06-02-2013 01:22 PM

Friederike thanks for the thread! Yep it's possible, I'm thankful whatever the reason! can you put me to waiting to O please? thanks x

 

Redrock - saw my sister last weekend for the first time in 2 1/2 years, hope you had as much fun as we did.

 

jwaite yikes, stressful with inlaws. I think my parents might be visiting during my next TWW. I really hope not as seeing them is stressful enough. FX for you.

 

fmorris stay positive it will happen for you, I'm sure of it x

 

lovestreet great to hear you're back in the game - who knows, you gotta be in it to win it so you never know! Maybe because it's all been rushed & you haven't been obsessing it will work. FX for you anyway. Awesome about the gay marriage thing as well.

 

justanotherjenny yippee - hope it all went well, sending lots of sticky babydust your way.

 

I've got a good feeling about June peeps, let's get these babies moving!


friederike 06-02-2013 01:54 PM

loving what a great story. Congratulations! Lots of sticky baby dust your way. Do you want me to put you in May graduates?

JustAnotherJenny 06-02-2013 02:14 PM

LOVING!!! CONGRATS!  WOW!!!joy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gif


granite 06-02-2013 03:32 PM

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carrot.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifYAY, LOVING!!!carrot.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifbroc1.gif

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Congrats, and what an awesome and inspiring story!

Looking forward to seeing you in Q&P when you're ready!!!

 

FX for the rest of you, too... Baby dust! goodvibes.gif


lizbian 06-02-2013 03:51 PM

loving - sorry I think our posts must have crossed. CONGRATULATIONS! That's a fab story & a way to start off the month. Yippee! carrot.gifcarrot.gifbroc1.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gifcarrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gifcarrot.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gifcarrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gifcarrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gifcarrot.gifbroc1.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gifbroc1.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gifcarrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gifcarrot.gifbanana.gif


chortles 06-02-2013 04:21 PM

Congrats loving!

heart-n-bones 06-02-2013 06:44 PM

Congrats Loving! and what a great story.

Frederike thanks for the June thread.

love street I love the pic! What a great image. I hope all the extra care results I. A BFP this month.

[/B]justanotherjenny[/B] good luck to you in the tww. I joining you there today.

You can move me to braving the tww. We in stemmed today and I think I o'ed today. So hopefully good timing. Also hoping I can be more relaxed this round.

lea2012 06-03-2013 11:08 AM

Hi all, just popping in to say happy June and wish luck to everyone. Congrats Lovingisliving!

 

Thanks Friederke for hosting this month.

 

Good luck in the TWW heart-n-bones, jwaite, Jenny and BBy – I hope June is a luckier month for everyone than May was.

 

Afm, I’m still taking a break. The miscarriage last month was very hard on my body physically and on DP and I emotionally (and financially – emergency room visit due to excessive bleeding + not-so-great insurance = serious medical bills). Now I’m just going back to temping and waiting for my cycles to (hopefully) get back on track. Waiting for some test results to figure out if we can pinpoint the reason for the multiple miscarriages. Depending on the results of those tests and how my cycle does getting back on track we may start trying again in July or August but DP is kind of pushing for us to wait until the fall so we can enjoy the summer without the TTC stress…we’ll see.

 

Although I’m not on MDC as much these days, I’m rooting for all of you.


escher 06-03-2013 11:56 AM

Loving: Hooray! Congratulations!!!!! joy.gifjoy.gifjoy.gif

Lea: I'm sorry that the miscarriage was hard on so many levels. I hope that the testing shows something useful, and I hope that your cycles normalize soon. I'm thinking about you. hug.gif

Heart: Good luck! It sounds like you had excellent timing. fingersx.gif

Jenny: Good luck! I hope that the TWW goes quickly and ends with exciting news! fingersx.gif

Hi to everyone else!

fmorris28 06-03-2013 02:44 PM

lovestreet, boy so do I! and thanks!!! I love the picture of the swimmers in the seatbelt!!! It's precious cargo! Good luck with inseam!

 

loving, Congrats! Have a H&H 9 months! What an awesome story!!!

 

Lizbian, I'm trying to for sure. thanks! Are you doing IVF this month?

 

LEa, Sorry that things were so hard on you and DP. Take the time you two both need and give it a go when you're both ready. Hugs

 

AFM, Not too much..mye RX for mye clomid is ready according to walgreens automated lady.I still can't decide if I want the trigger or not. Maybe more so since it'll be at home..? I don't know!


mamaetmaman 06-03-2013 02:55 PM

lovingthanks for sharing your awesome story! Congrats!

lizbian 06-05-2013 03:37 AM

fmorris It depends on timing. If I'm not teaching then yes but need at least 5 days free to travel to Denmark, do the extraction & put back in 3 days later. It's all very tight either way but keeping FX'd. Otherwise it'll be July x


TaviPDX 06-05-2013 03:34 PM

Hi! My name is Tavi and I'm happily partnered and blissfully in love with my sweetheart, L. He identifies as trans and genderqueer. We have three children (two eleven year olds and our five year old) and are seriously talking about another baby. It's alternately exhilarating and terrifying. We've been together for three years so we've never gone through a pregnancy together...

 

I've got a new name on here but I've been on Mothering for several years as NikkiTwist. My Dec. 07 DDC was one of the best parts of my pregnancy. I definitely want to have a home birth though my partner is more drawn to the birthing center.

 

Right now, we're discussing donors. We were both married to men with our first children and I had our five year old with my ex-wife with the help of a known donor (one of my best friends). He lives in Indiana and we now live in Oregon so we aren't planning on using him.

 

Ideally, we would love to use one of my partners male cousins as our donor so that the baby would be biologically related to all of us. Plus, while my partners family is super inclusive and supportive, we think it would be helpful for them to have a bio connection to the baby.

 

AND I had hyperemesis gravidarum with both children I carried. SO that is terrifying to think about going through again.

 

So many feelings! I just wanted to introduce myself and join the group.

 

We are definitely still just in planning stage. We will be for a few months but I'm hoping to start trying this summer....biggrinbounce.gif


JustAnotherJenny 06-05-2013 05:47 PM

Welcome Tavi!

 

Thanks escher and Heart n Bones -- good luck to you Heart!!


heart-n-bones 06-05-2013 07:39 PM

welcome Tavi!. Sounds like a lot to consider. hope the decision making proves easy!

I'm feeling really crampy today. Its hard not to overdo it at work, especially now that the heat has set in. I work on a farm - outside mostly, lots of heavy lifting. I love it, but I'm worried about how it will be once I do get pregnant. Anyone else have a physically demanding job?

BByHlPr 06-05-2013 08:02 PM

Mama: your clinic sounds terrible! We are at an expensive clinic, paying for iui out of pocket and it is $350 each! I also wouldn't want anyone else to order the sperm, I want to do it myself. I guess you have to stay with them?

Loving: congratulations! What exciting news!

Tavi: welcome and happy planning #4! Wow!

Lea: I hope you recover quickly emotionally, physically and financially! Enjoy the break!

Heart n bones and the rest of us in the 2ww good luck! I am halfway through and it is awful!

friederike 06-06-2013 07:20 AM

Hello Tavi Welcome.gif It is great to have such an experienced parent in our TTC group.

 

Liz - do you want to be moved?

 

 

TWW people - how are you all doing? When is the great stick peeing going to start for everyone?

 

 

afm - I had a thyroid US and gave several vials of blood at the RE yesterday and waiting for results til next thursday. We're testing the usual stuff and some rare special anti-body markers that might influence TTC success. The doc was super nice and helpful, she really encouraged me that it is possible to achieve a pregnancy hopefully soon. Told me that she was fine having a baby at 39, so I shouldn't worry so much abut my age. One advice that she had was to switch the donor after being unsucessful a couple of times, because sometimes some immune markers of 2 people just don't work well together even if they are otherwise healthy and fertile.

I didn't think to tell her I was in a lesbian relationship, not mentioning any reasons for why we're doing IUIs, just explaining our journey so far. She then just assumed my partner is infertile and well, she doesn't have any sperm, does she winky.gif and I ended up not correcting her assumption. I didn't plan on this, but everything happened so quickly. It goes against my activist heart but it has a benefit; no interference with the insurance coverage. Lesbian and unmarried straight couple fertility coverage is horribly unjust over here, giving free IUI and IVF to straight married couples but not anyone else.

 

On a positive note - the German Supreme Court stroke down the second last inequality left over in our same-sex-marriage law. We got civil unions/life partnerships 12 years ago with a seperate law and slowly fought for all the federal benefits of mostly tax breaks, immigration and adoption over the years in the Courts. Today it was decided that we get complete income tax benefits for joint tax filings, ending any financial disadvantages. The final only issue left is same-sex parent adoption, where idiotically right now 1 parent has to apply and adopt and the do another adoption later for the partner, which leaves kids less protected for a while and increases costs and barriers. But in general a good development. I am sure that soon, we will get rid of this "seperate but equal" situation of having two institutions (marriage for straights and life partneships for queers) who share the exact same rights and benefits and simply open up marriage like any other sane country.


lizbian 06-06-2013 01:33 PM

Tavi welcome and I'm impressed that you're thinking of trying again with so many already.

 

heartnbones I can see why that would be a worry for you. I'm lucky that I don't have to lift too much (apart from at the gym) but as far as work goes we're OK. The only lifting I might have to do is when we move house if I'm pregnant. xx

 

BBy good job on being half way through - it's a tough time!!!

 

Friederike I'm good where I am right now ta, will let you know if I need to change xx Fantastic about the changes to the laws. Have you ladies all heard about gay marriage getting through its second reading in the UK? it was a bit of a surprise given the overwhelmingly old & bigoted House of Lords but they surprised everyone. Hopefully we can get married from summer next year. Next stop trying to get something like that passed where I live as we can't do anything at the moment, not even second parent adoption which sucks.

 

Been a bit stressed - flat stuff but trying not to let it get to me. DW is yelling at everyone for a change, playing bad cop to my good cop and it's great she's really been quite protective of my stress levels. Had sore boobs for almost a week so thinking AF may be just around the corner. If it comes it has to be tomorrow or next Friday to work for IVF but it'll probably be smack bang in the middle knowing my luck!

 

A friend of mine has just told me she's 5 weeks pregnant. She bet we they'd be pregnant first but since she has sperm on tap it's no surprise she is eyesroll.gif Just hoping we won't be too far behind.


mamaetmaman 06-06-2013 02:13 PM

Welcome Tavi!

Bby- yeah I agree- very expensive. What's worse is they won't clarify what the "package" includes, except that sperm is separate. Too bad that we don't have many options here because I live in the suburbs.

So today is CD12 for me, and my follies are only 14mm, even with the Femara. If they're not 18mm by Monday, they may cancel this cycle and bring on AF. I'm very sad that my body seems to not be responding to the drugs, and I'm starting to jump to conclusions.

Anyway, hope everyone is well!


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