Hey queer parents!
So, you know how everyone knows not to google general symptoms that you experience during pregnancy? Right, because there will be some article that lists all of your symptoms to a T and then tells you that you or your baby is at risk of dying.
Well, there should be a similar warning for queers and googling "known donor stories". All you get are awful stories about donors battling for custody... or angry adult children of donors who feel abandoned. Oh God. Not what I needed.
DP and I are blessed to have been offered sperm by a good friend. He and his wife are very excited about us having children and feel honored that their family will be able to help us do that. But they are a straight couple and have no real context for what known donorship is like! They want to be sensitive to us. They have asked great questions and answered all of ours. One request, is that they want to hear some stories of families created by known donors! Totally reasonable request! I think they want to know about the emotions and questions and situations that come up on all sides! For the parents, for the donor... and what navigating the relationship between donor and child can be like. (Our donor does not want to be a father and we don't want that either. But we are really close with his family, so our children will know him. What can that look like?)
Again, totally reasonable and amazing and understandable. So off I go into google land... and now we are back to "oh god".
Where are these stories? Do you all have any? Or know where to find some? Or, better yet, do any of you have KDs who would be willing to email chat with ours?
Thanks for anything and everything!
So, you know how everyone knows not to google general symptoms that you experience during pregnancy? Right, because there will be some article that lists all of your symptoms to a T and then tells you that you or your baby is at risk of dying.
Well, there should be a similar warning for queers and googling "known donor stories". All you get are awful stories about donors battling for custody... or angry adult children of donors who feel abandoned. Oh God. Not what I needed.
DP and I are blessed to have been offered sperm by a good friend. He and his wife are very excited about us having children and feel honored that their family will be able to help us do that. But they are a straight couple and have no real context for what known donorship is like! They want to be sensitive to us. They have asked great questions and answered all of ours. One request, is that they want to hear some stories of families created by known donors! Totally reasonable request! I think they want to know about the emotions and questions and situations that come up on all sides! For the parents, for the donor... and what navigating the relationship between donor and child can be like. (Our donor does not want to be a father and we don't want that either. But we are really close with his family, so our children will know him. What can that look like?)
Again, totally reasonable and amazing and understandable. So off I go into google land... and now we are back to "oh god".
Where are these stories? Do you all have any? Or know where to find some? Or, better yet, do any of you have KDs who would be willing to email chat with ours?
Thanks for anything and everything!