Queer Conceptions: August 2013 - Page 3 - Mothering Forums
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#61 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 06:53 AM
 
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beastie- how'd it go yesterday? The two insems sounded like a great idea!

sandie- congrats!!! Sounds like your RE's office is making a good effort to personalize their care. I like the idea of asking them if they could match their competitor's prices. I would speak directly to the RE about that though, as the other employees might turn it down because they don't have any power in the billing of services.

jenny- glad they didn't cancel your cycle! Did they say what they were checking lab results for? Hope your follies grow grow grow and your E2 rises dramatically (I think each mature follicle releases E2 about 300).

jwaite- I have short luteal phases too. We have been using vaginal progesterone to lengthen it, which has been working really well.

liz- yeah, we'd probably do the same thing and save the POAS for day after the party. When is your birthday exactly?

friederike, fmorris, prettyisa, lovestreet- how goes it?

AFM- insem yesterday was a long wait (sat in waiting room for almost 2 hours), but went well. I didn't sleep a wink the night before (for details, you can read my blog), and wasn't feeling great, but the IUI was painless. At about 1pm, I had crippling cramps on my right side, which I'm hoping was ovulation (my single dominant follicle was on the R, and presumably a heffer). I have also had a really sore cervix yesterday and today, which has made it uncomfortable to sit up. I basically spent all day watching Netflix movies and then DW and I went to the cinema to see RED2, which was hilarious. I had grand plans of returning to the gym today, but my cervix is still unhappy.

So now I happily join the pineapple club! Fmorris- please move me to braving the TWW! Thank you!

With so many of us in the pineapple club, I feel like there should be some kind of a game we could play to pass the time. Or maybe a QOTD each day? What do you all think?
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#62 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 07:02 AM
 
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Welcome to the TWW, MamaEtMaman! Obviously, I'm a fan of taking a few lazy days after an IUI...

 

Go pineapple club, go! 

 

I'm in for a QOTD, but I don't have any good ideas...


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#63 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 07:25 AM
 
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Beastie—glad it went well! I think that baby rubbing therapy (ie: having adorable babies playing near your tummy) is at least as effective as lying down. Especially if they are splashing.

Sandie—congrats! It would be hard to leave a group like that—maybe you could negotiate, like Jenny said? It’s sounds like a big difference in cost after the first month.

Jenny—yay! Glad it wasn’t cancelled! I think they really do try hard not to cancel cycles if they can help it—dealing with people trying to have babies so much they must realize how stressful the waiting is!

Jwaite—that’s great that the vitamin B thing actually worked on your cycle! Sorry about AF, though. When do you expect to O again?

Liz—FX for you!! And I think waiting until after your party sounds like a good plan. When you get your BFP there’s no way you’ll be able to keep quiet if everyone you love is standing around asking what is new and exciting, you know? At least if you don’t know for sure you can fob them off more easily! Now you just need to come up with some really awesome party drinks that look good and alcoholic but that no one will notice don’t have any booze in them. Maybe a special pitcher for the birthday girl with the ‘good stuff’ in it that no one else will try?

Mama—Oof. Sorry about the cervix pain—that sucks. But happy to hear that the IUI went well!

AFM—BFN this morning, which is 14DPO, and I’m pretty sure that means I’m out. Which is a total bummer, but at this point I wish I could just get AF and move on, especially since I’m all crampy and grumpy about it. I have an appointment with my RE in two weeks, and we’re planning to squeeze in another try before I hopefully start the whole IVF process in September (if she agrees to my timing, which I expect she will).

I’m not in the pineapple club, but I have a QOTD for you anyway: Do you already have names decided on for your baby/ies? Are they set in stone, or more just ideas that you like? We had Edie’s name picked out before she was born but waffled a lot right up until we met her. This next one we are less sure of the names for, so once I do get preggo we’ll probably have to spend a lot of time looking at options.

She's here!
And so are the boys!
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Beastie: So, I just read last night that the success rate IUIs goes from 17% to over 30% when you do two, so I withdraw my previous statement smile.gif Glad the second one went well. We are doing an ICI at home, at least for this cycle. If it doesn't work we'll reevaluate. 

 

Jenny: Great news that they didn't cancel your cycle, that must be a huge relief. 

 

Jwaite: Glad to see you back, that's great that the B-5 helped your LP.  Things are chugging along, almost a positive OPK today. 

 

Liz: I'm with you, I hope that it's implantation. Is this your first book?

 

Mama: Bummer about your cervix? Has that happened before? I do love lazy days watching Netflix with wifey though. Good idea on the QOTD. What's your blog? I just started one recently myself. 

 

Isa: Sorry about the BFN. Will you test again? 

 

AFM: Still waiting over here. The tank gets shipped to DW's office today. Her boss was really excited and told everyone that she was getting sperm shipped there. DW was shocked as she told her boss not to tell anyone else. It's cute though how excited her boss is. They drew up insemination timelines on the white board and her boss keeps saying things like "so what's our plan" "what if we do it too late" DW keeps reminding her boss that she is not part of the we. Funny stuff. We went to dinner with another young lesbian couple last night. They are super pregnant, due in 3 weeks. We are already planning how our kiddos will be friends. 

 

QOTD: We have a name picked out for a boy, it's a family name that we both loved. Girl names are hard. Our families have terrible female names like Wanda, Melva, Gertrude. We want to have some picked before though as we aren't going to find out the sex of the baby. We liked the idea if women's rights activists/feminists but most of them have names we don't love either. We have already decided that we are going to keep the name to ourselves and have a name reveal ceremony/gathering after the babe is born. 


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#65 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 10:12 AM
 
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MamaetMaman, I forgot to send you some cervix love in my last post. I hope you're starting to feel less achy (but also continuing to take it easy). And please share your blog!

 

PrettyIsa, hug2.gif. It's not over till it's over, of course, but I hope you get answers (and a plan you feel great about) very soon. Good point also about cute kid vibes helping with fertilization. We did have a very cute toddler day yesterday. How old is Edie? Esther is almost 2 and a half. I'd love to see your blog, too. 

 

RedRockBand, thanks for those stats! It seems like the research goes both ways about the second IUI (and there's very little information about unmedicated cycles), but I'll choose to believe that 30% statistic. That sounds promising!  Also, hooray for home ICIs; the sweetness, silliness, and privacy (not even your DW's boss will be there!) of doing it yourselves is so special. Not too long now... Hooray for a first try!

 

QOTD: we also keep our baby names secret until we introduce the baby, but we do have tentative names in mind. We have a boy name we love that would have been Esther's name if she'd been a boy, and we have a lead girl name without a definite middle name. Our girl name has been creeping up in popularity, though, and also can be mis-gheard as a different name that we like less, so we'll see... We also may have to adjust our plans if we want to honor my mother's parents, who both died this past year; our Jewish tradition is to use their initials for a baby name, but we're having trouble finding the right names for that. So the answer is that we have some strong names in the lead, but aren't for sure. Lots of time to think about it! We won't find out the baby's sex, so we'll have to have two plans...


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#66 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 10:22 AM
 
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Popping in to say Hi and good luck to you all!

I love your QOTD so I just had to share how glad I am that DW and I told our families and friends from the beginning that we wouldn't be sharing our name choice until our baby arrived. It wasn't 100% true, but we wanted to preempt the questions and make it clear that this was not a choice for which we were interested in others' opinions. It worked really well and about 3 weeks ago we decided we were ready to share our name choice even though our little guy isn't due for 9 more weeks. Everyone we told, we just said that we changed our minds about sharing and they felt special to find out "early". Win-win!

My wife (30) and I (32) have been legally married since 2006. We are proud queer mamas to baby W, born 10/10/2013.
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#67 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 12:22 PM
 
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Beastie--if I ever update it again I'll share. Right now it's hoovering in limbo while I decide how much I want my mom to know about my current TTC situation. I love Esther! It's actually DD's Hebrew name. I thought about it really hard as her real name, but our last name ends in -er, and it was too much of a mouthful. But we were married on Purim (we made key-lime hammentaschen for favors) so it's a name I'll always love. DD is just edging up on 1 1/2, so still kind of straddling the line between baby and kid. It's a sweet age, even if her favorite word is 'no'.

She's here!
And so are the boys!
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#68 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 12:43 PM
 
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Isa: Is Edie an Edith? Our Esther is named after an Edith... and her birthday is right around Purim every year (she would have been an Esther anyway, but it's a nice alignment). I do remind her that she can fight for justice without being a beauty queen, though. Cute about the hammentaschen! Let us know about the blog!


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#69 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 02:08 PM
 
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Hey all!

My blog is: http://mamaetmaman.wordpress.com/

I apologize in advance that it's not as polished as some are. I am kinda lazy with it, so there isn't any editing for grammatical or spelling errors. I just keep it up as kind of a TTC diary for myself. Feel free to follow me (or not) and I always love comments!

QOTD- awesome question by the way!
We have a notepad with names we both like on it. We revisit the names fairly regularly an cross off ones that we have changed our minds on. Currently we have a girl's name that is a definite, because it is the feminine form of my grandfather's name (he was particularly special to me). We found boys names more difficult to agree on, so that list is much shorter.

Edie and Esther are beauitful names!
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#70 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 02:35 PM
 
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okay, queers, today was the day of our IUI #1.  

 

we went in super excited and giddy, i sent my lady flowers this morning at work to mark the occasion, and then over the course of the appointment our joy was pretty much deflated.

 

our usual RE had not been in for our last three U/S, so we got used to the other dr, who is super friendly and warm.  but since she wasn't OUR dr, she didn't have to update us on things like our test results, "family weight" and big picture.  she just did our U/S, cheered us on, and told us how cute we were.  cue today's appt, when our regular RE greets us, tells us that "it probably won't happen today" and that my lady's AMH has dropped from 1.1 in June to 0.66 in late July, so we probably want to wait no more than 3 months of IUIs to "get more aggressive."  she says there's research to suggest that amh can be suppressed by weight and bmi, and my lady's follies look great, so she thinks that that's probably the case, rather than her having the egg reserve to go with the 0.66 amh...although if the amh actually IS that low and gets lower or stays there, we might be able to qualify as infertile earlier than the 6 failed cycles required by our insurance, which means we might be able to use our $20k benefit to do IVF.  

 

then, she does the actual IUI and says lady's follie is in the process of popping as we speak, shoots the sperm in, and we watch it swim along.  the motility was 38, which is great, since xytex guarantees at least 25...it just looked like so much less than we were expecting.  she did actually have some pain and discomfort while it was happening, but i hope that's gone by tonight.  

 

so, a lot to process.  i think just the reality check(s) were more than we were expecting for this appointment.  we literally walked out of the office with forced smiles and heavy hearts.

 

fx for everybody else waiting to O/know/etc.!   i think today was just a weirdly timed, tiny taste of how disheartening this process can be at times, especially given how high up your hopes can be when the "reality check" comes crashing in.  oh well, if this cycle sticks, we won't have to worry about it, right?

 

so, can you move us to TWW?


partners.gif me (30), wifey (35, will carry), three IUIs with FDS, all BFNs, 4th IUI w/ clomid, trigger, and progesterone: BFP, m/c at 9.5 weeks, d&c.  5th IUI BFN.
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#71 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 02:41 PM
 
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QOTD: for names, we have narrowed down both for girl and boy, and even had fun figuring out what we would name triplet boys, but we've mostly tabled it for now.  i'm jewish too, so we wanted to honor my nana somehow with a girl name and possibly my brother with a boy, but my nana is still living (and living well!) so i don't want to offend her with a premature honor...we'll see how we feel if/once we get pregnant.  what's funny is my lady and i fight over whether we will call our child by their full name (her preference) or a nickname (mine)--for example, i can't imagine calling a little baby "daniel" or "elizabeth."  i would want to shorten and add a -y ending to a name!  i think the full name sounds too formal for a kid.  what do you guys think?


partners.gif me (30), wifey (35, will carry), three IUIs with FDS, all BFNs, 4th IUI w/ clomid, trigger, and progesterone: BFP, m/c at 9.5 weeks, d&c.  5th IUI BFN.
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#72 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 03:32 PM
 
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Beastie--yep, she's an Edith. My DP is into Edith Wharton and I just really liked it. Her middle name was my grandmother's, and I was amazed at how sweet the whole family thought it was that we used it. I forget that they all miss her, too, I guess.

Sandie--I'm sorry for the bad news--but glad you still did the IUI! I'm confused, though--what is going on that she thinks it won't happen today, but then does it anyway? We use the full and short versions pretty interchangeably, but I do always find it kind of sweet when people call her by the full name. It's a big name for a little person, but I like to hear it. smile.gif

She's here!
And so are the boys!
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#73 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 03:38 PM
 
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prettyisa, i think it was just the odds of the first insem working coupled with a rapidly dropping AMH?  i don't know.  angst!  how do people get through two whole weeks of this wait???


partners.gif me (30), wifey (35, will carry), three IUIs with FDS, all BFNs, 4th IUI w/ clomid, trigger, and progesterone: BFP, m/c at 9.5 weeks, d&c.  5th IUI BFN.
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#74 of 279 Old 08-07-2013, 06:16 PM
 
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So many queer Jews TTC! And we're all so secretive about our possible baby names! Still, I like hearing about everyone's considerations. Edie and Esther sound like they should be in an old lady knitting circle together or something (I love it). Sandie, I like the detailed planning that went all the way up to triplets! 

 

MamaetMaman, thanks for sharing the blog! It doesn't seem unpolished at all, and I really liked learning more about your process. 

 

Sandie! I am so angry on your behalf. First of all, no one should be surprised with unexpected information at the moment of IUI-- that's your time, with your partner, to focus on possibility, not to be lectured! If your RE had concerns,s/ he should have called you or set up a second meeting. As for the rest, my understanding is that AMH/ovarian reserve testing is pretty subjective, varies based on the cycle and the day within the cycle, and may not be very accurate. It's good to think about, but it shouldn't be used to make you fearful or pressure you to chose more interventions. And to top it off, body shaming? Gross. Plenty of people get pregnant at higher BMIs all the time. And that's not a conversation to have when someone is about to take her pants off! 

 

Ok, rant over. I hope you guys get to gloat a little about your perfect IUI timing, catching that egg just as the follicle popped!

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#75 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 04:29 AM
 
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Beastie - I'm hearing you on the taking it easy!

 

mama glad the insem went well, sorry about the pain. My birthday is Wed 14th. Perhaps we can have 'pineapple heads' or people who look like a pineapple everyday? xx

 

prettyisa sorry about the BFN, hope AF comes soon though. Yeah you're right about putting people off, very important! My DW is absolutely amazing & has bought 6 bottles of non alcoholic champagne that looks exactly like champers so I'm going to hide that somewhere & smuggle it into my glass. Re names I have a spreadsheet (ridiculous I know). We've got a shortlist of favourites & I think we'll probably have a couple in mind so that when it comes we can decide what it looks like. Also then don't have to worry about keeping secret for 9 months and worrying about spilling the beans!

 

sandie sorry to hear the experience was a bit deflating & the doc had less than impressive bedside manner!!!! FX for you anyway, you never know, you have a much better chance that we ever did with a home ICI!! re the names - as an Elizabeth I HATE my full name. I was always a Liz pretty much from the day I was born & sometimes (very rarely) a Lizzie. I still think it's good to name a kid by the full name and then shorten as they have an option in later life if they decide they don't like it. All of the names we like can be shortened. eg Tillie for Matilda, Lula for Tallulah...

 

Fried - you OK?

 

AFM well I'm pretty sure my pains are all OHSS related - I have ALL the symptoms of a mild form, just need to make sure it doesn't get worse from here. Other than that eating pineapple & loving the warm weather xx so many people in TWW, let's hope some of us are successful!


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Second IVF successful, he's here!!!!

DS born 12/4/2012, weight 6lb11 babyboy.gif

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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#76 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 06:15 AM
 
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Hey guys, yeah, I am still around. A bit down about TTC for so long and money issues if we have to do IVF, but we'll try again at the end of the month, that is if my cycle behaves. I have to skip one because O is this sunday since my last LP was a fricking 16 days long. I got another blood test at the endocrinologist for antibodies that might prevent conception, but nothing showed up. My vit D and TSH are both perfect now. I am unsure if I should just wait and see a bit longer or try and search for causes why it doesn't work. We could do a laparoscopy, but there isn't any reason to suspect sth. to show up there, so I am unsure if it is worth getting surgary.

QOTD - we have a girls name set. Carlotta Wilhelmine. It's a variation of my greatgrandmother Charlotte (who took a lot of time raising me when I was little) and DPs grandfather Karl and DPs grandmoms middle name. It has lots of nickname options (Lotta, Lotti, Carla, Carly, Will, Willy etc.). A boy is harder. We have no grandparents whose name we like for a babe and some of our favorites Oscar and Luis are in the top 20 baby names charts, so we won't use those. Nils is our strongest contender currently, since it isn't too common and nordic which kinda honors the Danish heritage our kid would have through his donor. We haven't found a middle name yet to go with it though.

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#77 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 06:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Mamet, got ya moved lady smile.gif and things with meeh are going pretty well! Just ready to see mye bfp!! Hope your cervix is much better.

Isa, sorry about the bfn. You think you'll be able to squeeze another insem again? And as far as names, we're still working on it Lol

Sandiego, got ya moved and goooood luck!!

AFM, apparently I've made it to 9dpo and am keeping a super low profile. I can say I've some crazy dreams..quick run down, breast implants Lol meeting the queen, and telling a old high school friend I think I'm pregnant. Busy brain Lol. Well good luck everyone!

Meehrainbow1284.gif (25) and DPrainbow1284.gif (35) Started TTC DS/DD #1Jan12 IUI #1 2/12-BFN, IUI #2 Oct12-BFN. IUI#3-BFN Mar13-BFFN, Jan14- ???--Giving it a go at home this time with KD and fresh swimmersribbonrainbow.gif 

 chartnew.gif  www.fertilityfriend.com/home/fee2806

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#78 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 06:50 AM
 
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sandie- on the bright side, your IUI timing was perfect, and now you know your wife has a limited reserve of eggs. To be honest, if I knew it would be this difficult for me to get pregnant (and I am only 31 years old and have a normal BMI), we would've gone straight to IVF. But really, it is amazing how perfectly timed your IUI was! My RE doesn't do it with any imaging, and doesn't check that I've ovulated or am close to, aside from the blood tests and ultrasound done two days prior.

friederike- yeah, I hear you about feeling deflated and the IVF costs. We've decided to venture thattaway next, because the rates of success are much higher, and DW gets what she wants (to be pregnant) lol.

fmorris- 9DPO! Almost there! Keeping fingers crossed for you. Maybe the dream was your body processing that your breasts are growing to feed a growing baby? Any symptoms so far? Good luck!
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#79 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 06:54 AM
 
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QOTD- imagine you get that BFP! aside from your partner, who is the first person you'd tell, when, and how would you tell them?
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#80 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 07:06 AM
 
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Liz, glad you're feeling well. You're doing such a good job not obsessing over whether your symptoms are OHSS or early pregnancy! Personally, even at just 3DPO, I'm obsessed with every gas bubble or cramp. Focusing on your birthday and party seems to be doing the trick!

 

Friederike, hug2.gif. I'm sorry that this has been such a long and disappointing journey so far, and that the other options seem prohibitive. Are you skipping this O because you can't insem on a Sunday? I hear you about the surprise long LP: I have charted at least cycle length for many years, and have never had a cycle longer than 29 days (except my postpartum one): last cycle, when we were waiting to start TTC at long last? 32 day cycle! Not only was it super stressful to wait, but if I'm not pregnant this cycle, it's looking like I'll be out of town for O next month. Sigh. Why won't our bodies just cooperate? Anyway, I love Carlotta Wilhemena! One of our short-list girl names is Willa, which is a Wilhemena derivative (DP's grandmother was a Wilma). Nils is nice too.

 

Fmorris,  9DPO is a big deal! Other than your wild dreams, are you having any symptoms? FX for you. Implant and stick, little egg!

 

Pineapple Club, what about you? I know it's (very) early days, but how are you feeling? I think I've been a little crampy post IUI, But not much else. The two times I've gotten pregnant I swear I felt a difference almost right away. Not so much this time, but of course this time I also have a toddler hanging off of me as a pretty major distraction.

 

AFM,  trying to stop obsessing over things I can't control and get some serious work done (I'm a professor, and classes start SOON, plus I'm coming off a year of sabbatical, so I really have to be ready for reality to strike; having babies on the tenure track is not the most brilliant career plan I ever had...).


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#81 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 07:12 AM
 
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Oops, I crossposted with MamaetMaman's QOTD!

 

DP and I agreed long ago that I was too OCD to have to wait for him (have I mentioned that DP is trans? hence the male pronouns) every time I want to pee on a test. But I usually test so early that I first get a very faint positive and am not sure, and then our tradition is to do a confirming digital test, which he hods and watches for the result.

 

As for telling other people, in the past I was super secretive, even in our inner circle. But when we had our loss in the first pregnancy, I realized that I had to tell lots of people bad news (when I needed their support) without ever having told them the good news. So the second time, we told more people, usually just in a phone call or in-person conversation. We kept it a facebook/outer circle secret well into the second trimester, though!

 

This time, if we're lucky enough to get a BFP, I'd tell our little community of queer parents, many of whom we've supported through their TTC process. And my parents and siblings. DP has a best friend he'd tell, plus his parents and siblings too.

 

Sorry for the long answer. Can you tell how much I don't want to get to work here?


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#82 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 08:45 AM
 
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sandiego: Sorry about the clinic experience. I think medical professionals sometimes forget that they are working with people. The timing sounds perfect though. Fingers crossed for you!

 

fried: Glad to see you. I've thought about the name Wilhelmina, it was my grandmother's name. It's her fathers name that we are going to use for a boy. The Dutch side of my family has names we like a lot more than the rest of my family. 

 

fmorris: Are you going to test at all or just wait to see if AF comes? I love the dreams. 

 

AFM: Talk about a whirlwind of a day. I did an OPK at 1ish yesterday, in hindsight I should have waited because I had just peed about an hour before, but it was a day full of meetings. It was neg. During staff meeting I started feeling mittelschmerz (I just love that word) so I did another OPK as soon as I got home and it was pos. After looking at previous charts we decided to inseminate really late last night. After ovulation pain, my temp always goes up the next day. Fingers crossed that the timing was good. My temp didn't spike but went up a little today. fmorris can you move me to braving the 2WW

 

QOTD: I'd tell my parents and sisters first. They are all so excited and know that we are trying. We have talked about fun ways to tell people but haven't decided for sure yet. Something really silly for sure. We'll tell family and close friends pretty early mostly because they all know that this month is our first try. If it ends up taking a while we might change how soon we tell people. 


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#83 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 12:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Mamaet, maybe that was mye brain telling the girls to get ready Lol. As far as symptoms ( which I have been ignoring) I've been nauseous some mornings and some nights, nothing major I guess besides mye monstrous appetite lately.

Beastie, Lol I know normally I'd be a basket case, but I'm doing well. No pee sticks around so I'm not tempted lol

Redrock, you know I'm not sure, I'm all about waiting nowadays, and so was DP, but now she sees time is passing she's asking if she needs to buy one Lol. We'll decide sooner than later I'm sure.

AFM, I'm taking the days one at a time, but they're still flying! I've gotten two great job offers which pleases meeh! One of them said they'd have to fly meeh out to Texas on the 19th to stay for a week and the great thing is its a part time position that would have meeh making a bit more than mye full time job. Things are looking good. Now all I need is to see mye pretty bfp. Keeping everything crossed for all the TWWers!

Meehrainbow1284.gif (25) and DPrainbow1284.gif (35) Started TTC DS/DD #1Jan12 IUI #1 2/12-BFN, IUI #2 Oct12-BFN. IUI#3-BFN Mar13-BFFN, Jan14- ???--Giving it a go at home this time with KD and fresh swimmersribbonrainbow.gif 

 chartnew.gif  www.fertilityfriend.com/home/fee2806

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#84 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 12:27 PM
 
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pineapple club! lady had her first piece of pineapple last night, and i think we are both just going a little loopy from this experience.  i am the least patient person i know, so this is going to be a tough 2 weeks.  during this time, my best friend is visiting and i'm going to portland to be in a wedding for my college bestie, so i told them both yesterday that we insemmed so they would know why i was a ball of angst when they saw me :)  

 

i seriously vacillate between thinking "how could this not work?  i watched the swimmers go in, and we saw the follie...what could go wrong?" and "this will never work, and now we have to wait 2 weeks to get bad news."  i had some nutcase dreams last night, both really violent and sexual, which is really weird, but i feel ya lizbian on the crazy dreams--and i wasn't even inseminated!  

 

one good thing? all this nervous energy has lady and i feeling extra amorous ;)  

 

oh and beastie, from everything i have read, tenure track babies are better for your career than end of grad school/abd job market babies, which can seriously mess things up.  have you seen "the baby penalty" article on the chronicle?  let's just say i whipped it out in therapy the other day...  oh, and i can somewhat relate to coming off sabatical: i'm coming off a fellowship year, heading into the most exploitative ta-ship around, first time job marketing, and diss finishing/defense, so i'm really in for an adjustment from my past year of self-care and scheduling autonomy.  

 

oh well, when i lost my brother i realized that its not actually "responsible" to put happiness on hold for job or financial security.  you don't get rewards for credit score or publications when you leave this world, but it does matter who you loved and who loved you.  


partners.gif me (30), wifey (35, will carry), three IUIs with FDS, all BFNs, 4th IUI w/ clomid, trigger, and progesterone: BFP, m/c at 9.5 weeks, d&c.  5th IUI BFN.
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#85 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 01:01 PM
 
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redrock sorry missed your last post - yep first book, second one out in December. Funny about DW's boss but as you say a bit disconcerting that she seems to want to be so involved! I was a bit annoyed at my boss (and friend) as she told one of the other bosses that I might be getting pregnant soon which was completely irrelevant and no need for him to know yet. I think she knew she'd messed up and has been good ever since.

 

mama - QOTD we'd tell my DW's parents that we got a BFP but nobody else until the 3 months. We'll see how that goes!!!! We'll tell them in person.

 

fmorris - you're doing well, keep it up!

 

Beastie - I'm pretty sure it's OHSS as I have every single symptom that was there but there's no point obsessing over it as soon we'll know! I've got a lot on which seems to be doing the trick, as well as having kept this trip a secret so not telling anyone about it! What are you a professor in? Both Fried & I teach different stuff, although mine's at a University accredited place rather than an actual Uni.

 

fried - sending big hugs your way xxhug2.gif

 

drinking lots of gatorade & water!!!!!

 

pineapple club - for you images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSX9Yu0nLZAcA-v3M18J-bFiPjezwujONtEYF-QNKpogV5bIZvC6Q


Liz (40) 'wife' to Abby (33). together 2001, 'Married' 2004. Fur babies Harvey, Bailey & Evie dog2.gif  & Churchill  cat.gif

 

Second IVF successful, he's here!!!!

DS born 12/4/2012, weight 6lb11 babyboy.gif

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

IVF 31st July 2013 12 eggs retrieved, 2 morula (nearly blasts) transferred 5th August,...

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#86 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 03:40 PM
 
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Fried--I like Carlotta, too! I actually call my sister that sometimes (her name is Caroline). I'd be leery of surgery without a reason. Even WITH a reason sometimes it makes things worse.
redrock--glad you were in a situation where you were paying attention and felt it! FX!

Sandie--funny, I call DP 'lady', so it's amusing to read your post. And there's no 'good time' to have babies, if you look at it logically.

Liz-Nice pineapple!

Fmorris--what do you do? And would you want to move to Texas? That would be great to be able to be part time! Glad your wait is going well, too!

And, sadly, can you move me to Waiting to O? I'm officially out. greensad.gif We'll get in one more cycle before the IVF stuff, at least. Our appointment with the RE isn't until after my next O, so we'll be in the wait when we talk to her, and presumably will start all of the bloodwork protocols at the start of my next period. Unless the next ICI works, which I'm doubtful of at this point. Hmpf. Oh well, at least I can drink this weekend!

QOTD--I feel like we'll have to tell everyone sooner than last time. Our queer mom friends are all TTC, so it will be pretty necessary to tell them. Our parents. And possibly a few other people. Then everyone after the first tri is over.

She's here!
And so are the boys!
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#87 of 279 Old 08-08-2013, 09:32 PM
 
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I hope everyone is doing well. My first time checking into the August board, much to read here! Fmorris - can you please move me to Waiting to O thanks

me: 35 years old & my wife: 38 years old, started TTC in July 2012

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#88 of 279 Old 08-09-2013, 07:17 AM
 
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That pineapple picture is terrifying, Liz!

 

Working down the list in my compulsive way:

 

redrockband, that timing sounds pretty perfect! Welcome to the Pineapple Club!

 

fmorris, those symptoms sound promising. And your calm waiting is exemplary! What kinds of jobs are you looking for?

 

sandie, I hear you about being an impatient ball of angst! Glad you're getting the amorous pay off, at least. As for the academic baby-making, I guess what I've learned is that there's no right time for it, and it's hard either way. We had planned on an end-of-grad-school baby, but then I got a job my first year on the market, so we delayed. I envied my friends who had their babies in grad school because they had greater flexibility time-wise, and because they didn't have to add TTC to the first year or two of TT work. On the other hand, I do appreciate the salary, benefits, and union protection that I've had. Lots of micro-aggression, but that might be specific to my department? What I know for sure is that you're right that our families matter more than the jobs and publications. So in that sense, there's no wrong time. I'm really sorry to hear that you lost your brother. hug2.gif

 

Lizbian, I'm glad that keeping busy has distracted you from obsessing! And cool that we have so many teachers/academics on the thread: Sandie, fried, you, me... anyone else?). I'm in English, doing 16 and 17C literature and cultural studies.

 

PrettyIsa, I am so sorry that this wasn't your cycle. irked.gif It sounds like you have a good plan moving forward, though. And you never know: that last ICI could be the one! Are you using the same donor as you did for Edie? I'd love to hear about that decision for you, since our process has been so informed by that.

 

AFM:  Still just obsessing over not much! 4DPO-ish today, so I'm hoping to know if my symptoms are imaginary or real as we head into the weekend and the second week of the TWW...


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#89 of 279 Old 08-09-2013, 07:18 AM
 
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Oops, forgot to say hi to SanDiego.  Nice to "meet" you.


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#90 of 279 Old 08-09-2013, 07:38 AM
 
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welcome Sandiego!

prettyisa- sorry to hear about AF. But now you have a chance to start again!

beastie- I have a medical degree and previously taught in a university medical program. I loved teaching so much that I now teach high school public health and science in the public system!

Yesterday's QOTD- We'd probably tell my sister first, then my mother soon after. DW's parents and brother would be next (but maybe not for a few weeks after). We bought a Seuss shirt from Disneyworld that says "Soon-to-be-Thing" with an arrow pointing to my belly. We can't wait to have a reason to wear it!

Someone wanna come up with a new QOTD?
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