**Queer TTC in Sept Thread** - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 271 Old 09-05-2007, 03:05 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I can only barely stand myself at this point. I POAS tomorrow morning!!! I've held off from buying them so I wouldn't even be tempted to pee on them too soon. Tomorrow is 10 dpo. As much as I'm trying to be realistic about our chances my hopes are up and I'm too excited to do anything but stare at my chart, stare at other peoples charts, and lurk all over MDC!

Requesting an abundance of baby dust. Also which brand of HPT should I get?

-Rachel

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#32 of 271 Old 09-05-2007, 04:55 PM
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I'm the wrong girl to comment on the HPT--me and my bag 'o dollar store tests
BUT I can pass out the

11/24/08 SMBC with a loving LTR DP in a Queer & Poly relationshiploving my new baby Kale Cqolbi Justice!!!!!
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#33 of 271 Old 09-05-2007, 05:27 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Forgot to add.

*Changes Made to Here*

Also 2hm, saw your post on the one thread about the blood test. I don't know the answer to your questions but I'm still : for you. Keep us updated!

KJM, Thanks for all that baby dust! Yippeee! *Dancing through the all the magical dust*

-Rachel

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#34 of 271 Old 09-05-2007, 05:29 PM
 
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for BurtsGirl.
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#35 of 271 Old 09-05-2007, 09:27 PM
 
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I just knew I was pregnant. My breasts hurt. My chart was triphasic. But I kept getting BFN's, so I went to the doctor today for a blood test. It is negative. Any chance that a blood test at 13DPO can give a false negative?

I am really confused. This is my 9th month charting, but first month inseminating. The first 8 months were for practice and to get to know my cycle. FF has never said I had a triphasic chart until this month, but I never inseminated until this month!

How could I have gone 8 months without a "triphasic" chart, get one in the first month of insems, and not be pregnant?!?!?!? It does not make sense. If the triphasic chart is not indicitive of pregnancy, why did I not get one the other months I was charting?
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#36 of 271 Old 09-05-2007, 11:01 PM
 
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I posted in TTC, 2happymamas, but gah how frustrating! I am thinking good thoughts. I would have thought a beta would show by now, but if you implanted late, then it would not. Usually it shows at 8-10dpo from what I have read.

BurtsGirl - I'm all about the dollar store pg tests too! I suggest those if you are tesing at 10dpo, because if you get negs for a bit it's not a big waste of money.

The other possibility is get First Response, but get a two pack. They are apparently the most sensitive tests on the market, at least my pharmacist says so and so does the ovusoft message board mamas. But my dollar store test gave me a faint positive the same day I got a faint positive on FRER. Good luck!!
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#37 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 02:10 AM
 
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Hi everyone, I'm somewhat new to this board (I think I posted once or twice a few months ago). We're in our 2nd month of trying and currently "waiting to know"
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#38 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 09:29 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Well looks like I'm out for Sept. I tested yesterday evening (I just couldn't wait once I had the tests in hand) and of course it was a BFN. My temp took a nice plunge today so I didn't even bother testing. SHE should be here tomorrow. I'll move me when AF arrives. I'm ok. Depressed a little but I was somewhat prepared for this. We just insemed too early. This month will hopefully be MUCH better in the timing department. I'm just really disappointed.


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-Rachel

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#39 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 09:45 AM
 
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I am out for the month. I got a negative blood test yesterday and my temp dropped by nearly full degree.

I am really disappointed, but now it is time to get ready for next month. I went to the RE last week. Instead of doing ICI's at home, I we are doing an IUI with a low dose of clomid and HCG trigger. It is actually less expensive to go the RE route with one vial than to use three vials at home. At least we know the timing will be pegged in September. That will be one thing I do not need to worry about!

Burt's Girl: I am sorry to hear that you are out for this month, too. It sucks, doesn't it?
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#40 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 10:18 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Yes, it does suck. But I'm doing some healing/evaluating through my journaling and I'm hoping to have a better handle on things when we try again this month. I laid in bed this morning after I saw my temp and thought, how the heck can I do this another month? But I still don't have a baby so again, we will try.

We are planning another ICI at home, 2 vials, with better timing this month. If that doesn't work we'll take Oct off, breathe a little, get some blood work done, and do IUI with a RE in Nov. I'm a little worried about my progestrone levels so I'd like to have that test done also.

AngelaM, did you ever hear back about your progest. test?

-Rachel

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#41 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 10:23 AM
 
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Originally Posted by BurtsGirl View Post
Yes, it does suck. But I'm doing some healing/evaluating through my journaling and I'm hoping to have a better handle on things when we try again this month. I laid in bed this morning after I saw my temp and thought, how the heck can I do this another month? But I still don't have a baby so again, we will try.

We are planning another ICI at home, 2 vials, with better timing this month. If that doesn't work we'll take Oct off, breathe a little, get some blood work done, and do IUI with a RE in Nov. I'm a little worried about my progestrone levels so I'd like to have that test done also.

AngelaM, did you ever hear back about your progest. test?
What makes you worry about your progesterone level? I am asking b/c I do not know anything much about progesterone and the consequences of having a level that is not "normal."
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#42 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 10:34 AM - Thread Starter
 
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1) I have a shortish luteal phase (10 days) They say anything less than 10 is something to worry about. I barely make it over that.

2) I have low temps. Before O I'm around 96.5ish after O I almost never get above 97.9ish

3) I'm overweight. Which could just mean I have too much estrogen.

The test would just give me a little more peice of mind.

-Rachel

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#43 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 01:18 PM
 
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BurtsGirl- I can now be moved to waiting to O.

In terms of progesterone, I just found out that my tests came back well within the normal range. I decided to test because my luteal phase is also short (10-11 days), my temps are low (often under 97.0 in the first half of my cycle), and because I had an early miscarriage the first time. However, my Dr thinks that the early m/c was probably due to chromosonal abnormality, not anything that I need to worry about for the future, and my levels look good, so hopefully things will work soon. But, the test is simple and gave me a lot of piece of mind, so I highly recommend doing it- there's no point in spending all this money on sperm and then not doing these simple things to check and make sure that our pregnancies will stick once we achieve them!

A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!

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#44 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 03:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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BurtsGirl- I can now be moved to waiting to O.
Done

Quote:
Originally Posted by AngelaM View Post
In terms of progesterone, I just found out that my tests came back well within the normal range.
So glad everything came back normal!

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But, the test is simple and gave me a lot of piece of mind, so I highly recommend doing it- there's no point in spending all this money on sperm and then not doing these simple things to check and make sure that our pregnancies will stick once we achieve them!
: My thoughts exactly!

Angela, Are you taking vitex?

-Rachel

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#45 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 05:37 PM
 
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I am also "waiting to know".... 8 dpi

, Angela.
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#46 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 07:07 PM
 
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Sorry to hear about the BFN's BurtsGirl, 2happymamas, and Angela M.

At least you all have good plans for next month. That's hopeful.

I've been kicking around some ideas for this month. I predict 5 days till +OPK. I'll be using preseed this time, but I was wondering about doing a true ICI and not just a vaginal insem this month. My sperm is unwashed. Do you think there's any harm in putting the syringe right on, or just barely in, the cervix opening before plunging? The unwashed sperm would still have to go through the cervix, but they may get pushed along a little faster than normal. Does this sound dangerous?

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#47 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 08:09 PM
 
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Hi all. I've been rather quiet but have been following the goings on...trying not to get too distracted from my work!

Sorry Burtsgirl that you're waiting to O again.

I've been trying to chart a first cycle, but I didn't get a single positive OPK. But my temp did rise over 2 days like I've heard it should. And my breasts are really quite tender but I have no idea if that's because I'm gonna ovulate really late, or because my period's due in about 2 weeks, or because something more exciting is going on (despite the continual negative OPKs). Mother nature sure keeps us guessing!

I'm on CD19 so I'm guessing I've either not ovulated or the OPK tests didn't pick it up. fertility friend says as long as your temp rises then you're good. But how much does it have to rise by? Mine only rose by 0.5 Celsius, stayed there for 2 days, then dropped again today. Who knows what that means?!

When is the earliest you can do a pregnancy test?
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#48 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 08:33 PM
 
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Angela, Are you taking vitex?
I'm not, though I'm thinking that perhaps I should be. I'm just a little afraid to start it now, because I've heard it takes three months to really kick in, and that your cycles can get all wonky in the meantime. Not sure if I can deal with that while trying to plan inseminations, etc. Any advice?

Thanks for the hugs, everyone. I just got a big stack of long profiles, so I'm choosing a new donor tonight, and ordering another batch of sperm tomorrow!

A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!

Building queer family since 2008!

(and oh, did i mention we're having twins?!?)

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#49 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 09:46 PM - Thread Starter
 
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simcon - Gotcha

pranava - Thanks for the support. To answer some of your questions and maybe give you and others some ideas. This is what we did this time and we'll probably try it again next time also. We did not use preseed although we will next time. DW inserted the speculum and opened it.

Side note: I've been told using the speculum wasn't that great because when you pull it out some of the Goods come with it. But it really allow DW to see.

She then, with the speculum still in plunged the syringe on the top part of my cervix and kind of gave it a small coating of the Goods. The next part was done with great care. She left the syringe and catheter inside me near the cervix and slowly pulled out the speculum. She then finished plunging the syringe slowly leting out the rest of the Goods. She said she maybe used 1/3 of the vial to do the coating.

I've heard that you should not do an IUI with ICI sperm, it can cause cramping and infection, but I'm also curious about just puting the ICI sperm just inside the cervix. Anyone know about that?? Anyway HTHs a little, pranava.

kk_davey - Thanks for the support, KK. It sounds to me like you haven't O'ed. That's just my opinion. It varies from woman to woman on how big the jump is. Look at some of our charts to get an idea. But when you do O, your temp should jump up and STAY up until your period, if I'm not mistaken. You can test as early as 5 days before your missed period. So if you know when AF should be arriving you should be able to test 5 days before that. But it also might not show till after your missed period. HTH

Angela - I wish I had some. I was going to ask you for some. I'm a little scared to start taking it myself for the same reasons you mentioned. Good luck chosing the new donor! Maybe this next one will be more potent!

Preseed Question: Do you mix the sperm with the preseed or just use it as lube? Or do you insert it into the vagina?

-Rachel

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#50 of 271 Old 09-06-2007, 10:59 PM
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2happy, Burts, and Angela all around.

Its a sad time, and so be with it, be sad, acknowledge all the feelings, make notes of the doubts you carried and plan to minimize those next time. Plan positively for future cycles and let all that stuff go....My healer told me, yesterday, that I cannot make a baby happen. Its not up to me. I need to let these things go out to the universe--Its not my PERSONAL failure or success. I nodded and left, totally bewildered and a tad bit sketch out about how newage (I pronounce it rhyming with "sewage") she can be sometimes. Last night I was thinking about in bed. I asked DP what she thought about the comment. I expected her to say 'Oh babe thats just that newage (again I would rhyme it here too) crap!" But she didn't!! Rather she laughed and said "You don't really see it as a PERSONAL failure do you--Come on babe you are a gardener-- You know that when we plant seeds it isn't ALL about the soil, or even the water, or sun--It takes a bit of magic too!! For every 10 seeds we plant we hope for 1 or 2 sprouts" We then went on to discuss all the seeds that failed to germinate, the plants did sprout never suceeded in taking full form, and all of our other gardening mishaps over the years---It was an amazingly helpful conversation based on some amazingly helpful newage (you can still rhyme it if you want to) advice

11/24/08 SMBC with a loving LTR DP in a Queer & Poly relationshiploving my new baby Kale Cqolbi Justice!!!!!
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#51 of 271 Old 09-07-2007, 12:22 AM
 
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My healer told me, yesterday, that I cannot make a baby happen. Its not up to me. I need to let these things go out to the universe--Its not my PERSONAL failure or success.
This is really smart. I realized at some point that I was beating myself up over not "getting it right," and that my desire to be perfect at everything made me feel like I ought to be able to "master" the conception process somehow. Of course, that's ridiculous. All we can do is live our lives, be as healthy as possible, and try to let ourselves be open to whatever will or won't happen. It's hard for me. I like control, and I'm not always comfortable with ambiguous situations. But I'm trying really hard to trust that I'm going to get the baby I'm meant to have, when I'm meant to have it.

Alright, off to bed. Must get lots of sleep, wake up early, and order more sperm!

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#52 of 271 Old 09-07-2007, 09:52 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Rather she laughed and said "You don't really see it as a PERSONAL failure do you--Come on babe you are a gardener-- You know that when we plant seeds it isn't ALL about the soil, or even the water, or sun--It takes a bit of magic too!! For every 10 seeds we plant we hope for 1 or 2 sprouts"
That's just good stuff! And probably something I needed to hear. Thank you for sharing it with us, kjm! And your DP sounds like a smart woman!

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that my desire to be perfect at everything made me feel like I ought to be able to "master" the conception process somehow. Of course, that's ridiculous. All we can do is live our lives, be as healthy as possible, and try to let ourselves be open to whatever will or won't happen. It's hard for me. I like control, and I'm not always comfortable with ambiguous situations. But I'm trying really hard to trust that I'm going to get the baby I'm meant to have, when I'm meant to have it.
Angela, I TOTALLY understand this. Although I'm not beating myself up about it, I do tend to like control over things. I'm a planner. And when my plans don't happen I get disappointed and confused. Especially if I did everything right. Next time may be different, but this past time I knew the timing was way off. I had hope but not a ton which made that BFN not so surprising.

We are camping this weekend with a group of friends. It will be a good time to get outside, get some fresh air, commune with nature, and will take my mind off this process. I'm not even taking my thermometer! I'm hoping to have a better handle on myself this time around since everything isn't last minute and we know what to expect. I can't go through another month of this all wound up and all-consumed. So I'm hoping to get back to my normal life, if that's possible. I'm not sure where Aug went. We have a busy month this month so I'm hoping that will keep me occupied.

What do you guys do to keep yourselves from going crazy? Do you have any hobbies?

-Rachel

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#53 of 271 Old 09-07-2007, 10:15 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Do you think there's any harm in putting the syringe right on, or just barely in, the cervix opening before plunging? The unwashed sperm would still have to go through the cervix, but they may get pushed along a little faster than normal. Does this sound dangerous?
I was curious so I did some searching. I was surprised to find that it sounds like you CAN do this safely!

Quote:
What is Intracervical Insemination?
ICI is one of the more commonly used types of artificial insemination. It is a painless and quick procedure that helps to deposit your partner’s sperm samples directly into your cervix. This can help to increase the chances that sperm will swim through your uterus and fallopian tubes, where they will fertilize an egg. Couples often opt for ICI because it is associated with good success rates and is less expensive than IUI procedures. ICI is typically performed by your reproductive specialist at your local fertility clinic.
Source: http://www.sharedjourney.com/iui/cerv_ai.html

Quote:
The intracervical insemination procedure
Intra-cervical insemination is a relatively simple procedure and takes about five minutes to perform. The patient lies on the examination table, a doctor or a nurse inserts a speculum into the vagina, the semen sample is then placed into the cervix with a plastic catheter. Sometimes a sponge or cap is placed into the vagina before removing the speculum to keep the sperm near the cervix and can be taken out about 6 hours later.
Source: http://www.ivf-infertility.com/insemination/insemination4.php

More info:
http://www.pregnancy-info.net/infert...ial_insem.html

So I'm assuming that if you purchase ICI sperm from a bank then you can do this procedure. I'm going to do a little more looking around but it's looking good that this is the way we'll go this time also. Would love to hear from anyone who has done a true ICI and placed the sperm into the cervix. Might create a new thread for this topic.

-Rachel

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#54 of 271 Old 09-07-2007, 11:33 AM
 
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What do you guys do to keep yourselves from going crazy? Do you have any hobbies?
I think that's the hardest part for me- not getting totally obsessed! Right now, I have a big deadline with my dissertation, which has forced me to get my academic butt in gear. (I'm a grad student in a PhD program.) I also try to channel some of that obsessive energy into writing about the ttc process. I think that's helpful, and will also give me some record later on of what this time was like.

I like the idea of a hobby, though. I think I could use one! What about you, BurtsGirl?

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#55 of 271 Old 09-07-2007, 11:41 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Well I read a lot, but I've been trying to stay way from baby-related books. A good friends daughter is going camping with us and I'm hoping she'll teach me her mad knitting skillz. I've got some yarn and needles and tried to learn watching videos online, it didn't work. So I'm hoping the one on one will help! I'd love to get into knitting and knit a blanket while I'm preggers.

I too should be getting more work done, but it's just so hard to stay off this website, .

-Rachel

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#56 of 271 Old 09-07-2007, 12:07 PM
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I too should be getting more work done, but it's just so hard to stay off this website, .

Here! Here!! My co-worker just came over and I was thinking "please don't look at my monitor...please don't look at it" Time to really get to work...but it is nearly impossible...2ww NOW...planning and waiting to O later...its a vicious cycle. I've started a daily exercise routine every morning now, I figure that if I could find time for MDC Every damn morning then I can find time to walk in the woods instead --and then check MDC when I get to work As for hobbies my include swimming as much as possible (but New England Fall is sneaking in), Kayaking, Hiking, and watching movies with my sweetie. None of these activities directly involve TTCing so i get a break and they all help me release all the TTCing tensions--but don't be fooled, I do them all to be in better shape for TTCing so, I guess I am still just as obsessed!!

11/24/08 SMBC with a loving LTR DP in a Queer & Poly relationshiploving my new baby Kale Cqolbi Justice!!!!!
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#57 of 271 Old 09-07-2007, 12:14 PM
 
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Great info BurtsGirl! Thanks for looking around. I have a retroverted uterus, so I think it makes it a bit more challenging for the sperm to find their way into the cervix. We'll just give them a little jump start this month then and see what happens

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#58 of 271 Old 09-07-2007, 07:10 PM
 
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**clears throat**

I suppose I should really de-lurk.

I'm a queer mama, single by choice, mother of one as a smbc, mother of two with an ex, am inseminating tomorrow at home with ICI. When I got the positive OPK today I just about fainted! I'm such a geek, it's just that it's exciting. I'm a realist: it may not happen this cycle; it may. If it doesn't, I try again. Still. I'm praying!

Generally, I have no trouble conceiving -- it's catching a sticky baby that's hard (ten conceptions, three children).

Wishing us all luck this month!

: I am a woman of faith; a mother; a writer. :
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#59 of 271 Old 09-07-2007, 10:17 PM
 
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**clears throat**

I suppose I should really de-lurk.

I'm a queer mama, single by choice, mother of one as a smbc, mother of two with an ex, am inseminating tomorrow at home with ICI. When I got the positive OPK today I just about fainted! I'm such a geek, it's just that it's exciting. I'm a realist: it may not happen this cycle; it may. If it doesn't, I try again. Still. I'm praying!

Generally, I have no trouble conceiving -- it's catching a sticky baby that's hard (ten conceptions, three children).

Wishing us all luck this month!
Hi Zyla,

Welcome! I'm trying very hard to become a queer single parent by choice, so you're in good company here. I know what you mean about getting excited about the positive OPK. Sometimes I have to remind myself that they're not pregnancy tests. I just got a new batch of OPKs in the mail, and am gearing up for another cycle of inseminating.

Though, frustratingly, I tried to call and order sperm today, and couldn't get ahold of anyone at the sperm bank. Is it some holiday in California that the East coast has forgotten about? Grrr... Of course I picture them returning everyone's call but mine, and selling off those precious vials of sperm that I'm so desperate to break the bank on. After going through all the agonizing decision-making of choosing a new donor, I'll lose it completely if he's sold out by the time I actually get through to someone there.

Anyway, hope everyone has good, distracting plans for the weekend. I'm headed to the beach tomorrow, which always relaxes me. In fact, BurtsGirl, I think you could say that the beach is my hobby!

Good luck to Zyla and anyone else inseminating this weekend! Fertile wishes and lots of sticky baby dust...

A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!

Building queer family since 2008!

(and oh, did i mention we're having twins?!?)

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#60 of 271 Old 09-07-2007, 10:45 PM
 
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Originally Posted by AngelaM View Post
I'm not, though I'm thinking that perhaps I should be. I'm just a little afraid to start it now, because I've heard it takes three months to really kick in, and that your cycles can get all wonky in the meantime. Not sure if I can deal with that while trying to plan inseminations, etc. Any advice?
If you want some to try, PM me with your address. I've got some tincture and some pills just waiting for a good home (both opened, but AOK).
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