Queer TTC December 2007 - Page 7 - Mothering Forums

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Old 12-12-2007, 05:10 PM
 
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Add another BFN! She's here today, and she's a beast!

The only good side to my obsessing throughout the 2ww is that by the time my period gets here, I'm already convinced it didn't work and have cried and gotten all the sadness out. So right now, mostly I'm just glad to have the 2ww over with. But of course I'm sad too.

sigh....someone's gotta get a BFP, right? It's just the odds!

mhiccup, for what it's worth, over thanksgiving, we talked to my whole family about our ttc process and all had a fun time laughing about our entry into cervix gazing (my mom would let us use her room every night for it and then we'd all have a glass of wine together and talk about the insanity). for me, it was great to include them more. BUT...if it's stressful at all, i wouldn't do it. and i also agree that travel can mess up your cycle.

JenInMpls, codeine saves me every winter! without it, i cough so hard i throw up (sorry...) and have to sleep sitting up in a chair. it's the only thing that works. it'll be awesome for you!

So i can be moved to taking a break, cause i'll be in sunny mexico, drinking margies and eating all the seafood i want when i ovulate this cycle.
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Old 12-12-2007, 06:50 PM
 
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mhiccup - I vote d as well(unless money is no object). My reason is that traveling makes me dehydrated and I have bad CM. For me, inseming while traveling is throwing money away.

Life is strange and wonderful.  Me read.gif, DP lady.gif, DS (3/09) blahblah.gif , 3 dog2.gif  and 4 cat.gif

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Old 12-12-2007, 07:26 PM
 
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Move me to waiting to O. I F*$&king bled today. This is the first time my period actually made me cry.

Well, I think I'm waiting to O. We had said that we would take December off if this month didn't happen because we will be in Houston for the holidays, but with O falling right smack in the middle of our trip we could safely have the goods sent there.

So, a poll. Is it:

a. Ewww, shipping sperm to your parents' house is too weird;
b. It is weird, but who cares. They want this grandbaby too;
c. Not weird at all - go for it! or;
d. Weird or not, trying to do this during the holidays while traveling might just be too stressful and a doomed proposition

Sorry to post and not contribute to the really great conversations in the last few days. Work has been crazy. But I will try to improve my lurking ways.
I vote "b," since I'm a sucker for funny insemination stories (and I travel a lot without it really affecting my cycles... )
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Old 12-12-2007, 08:04 PM
 
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I'm a b as well. It'll be good to involve them &, unless your cycle gets outta whack (can you save it if so?) I don't see why you should waste a month.
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Old 12-12-2007, 11:49 PM
 
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greetings, all! JenInMpls pointed me your way. My sweet darling, M, and I will be inseminating this cycle. I am so impatient.

Waldorf-teaching mama to A (12/08), wife to my sweet wife M , and sharing a home with a dog , four cats , five turtles, a fish, and a crab.
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Old 12-12-2007, 11:53 PM
 
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Hi all, AF came for Heather yesterday. We'll be taking off Dec for the holidays, so it looks like the end of Jan before we'll try again.

I guess we're still in shock, so there's not much to say over here.

Sorry for all the other BFNs around here...

Oh, and as for the poll, I was just glancing at it, but I say if you're okay with your parents house and trying there, then go for it!

I guess move us to taking a break?

K, H, and baby E (who is now three!!!)
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Old 12-13-2007, 12:01 AM
 
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hey miep for you, yet another person I could possibly hit up for donor milk if we had a baby the same time

: mama to T 9/04 and E 11/08
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Old 12-13-2007, 01:59 AM
 
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Whoa, astraphell, are you my long lost twin? This is scary it's so me. Are you a Cappy too? And yea I'll teach you to knit. Well, I can give you some resources if you'd like which really taught me what I know.
Actually I'm Aquarius and we're not supposed to be obsessive! But I have a Capricorn moon, so I think that's where I get that from. It's funny, certain things will pull me in and I'll get crazy, while I let other stuff (like housework!) go to someone else to take care of.

I would love it if you could PM me some of the resources you used to learn how to knit. I can make a very basic scarf, (no frills, no color changes!) and that's about it.

I found out today just how much this stuff has been on my mind... my temperature dropped a bit today, and I started getting my usual period backache and pre-spotting stuff going on. I thought I'd be upset, but I think the past couple of days of depression have been more related to the "what if" and the dread. Now that it's here, I'm actually really okay with it. I got a lot of work done that I've been putting off, and even went and knocked out a big portion of my Christmas shopping list. I'm still bummed about it, but just knowing what is ahead, at least for right now, really helps me to focus on a direction.

So, I suppose we're technically in the "Taking a Break for the Holidays" column too. I should O around Dec 30-Jan 1, and my partner will be recovering from surgery on Dec 27. I'm thinking maybe it will be for the best so we can recover together from all the stress. I still plan to temp and chart as if we were doing an insem, though, because I haven't done it that long and could really use the information.
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Old 12-13-2007, 11:11 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I think I've got all the updates!

If you're including a request to be moved in a longer post, could you please bold the request? I'm afraid I'm going to miss something.

Alternatively, you could PM me.

Thanks!
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Old 12-13-2007, 11:11 AM
 
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good morning. I'm new and have been obsessing over the internet for information and friendly words and am so glad I finally found this site. my partner and i want to try to insem right after the holidays, but it seems crazy to do now.
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Old 12-13-2007, 11:15 AM - Thread Starter
 
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good morning. I'm new and have been obsessing over the internet for information and friendly words and am so glad I finally found this site. my partner and i want to try to insem right after the holidays, but it seems crazy to do now.
Welcome! It's not necessarily crazy to insem around the holidays--it really depends on what your holidays are like, how your body responds to stress, etc.
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Old 12-13-2007, 11:20 AM
 
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I am also flipflopping about my donor decision, that's probably what makes it crazier. That and trying to work out shipping. Thanks for responding to my question about Xytex.
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Old 12-13-2007, 11:23 AM
 
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Hi tiggerkong22! I just found this site myself this week. We are 2ww right now. I agree with Frog...if you're holiday's aren't too crazy and you don't find yourself too stressed out...go for it! I should actually know how successful this cycle is for us on Christmas day! Crazy. But, at least I'll have a lot on my mind to keep me busy if the news isn't good. Anyway...good luck to you...and keep us posted here!

DS Alexander Joseph born 6/29/09
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Old 12-13-2007, 11:27 AM
 
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Thank you Jenn and good luck to you too. Is this your first time TTC?
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Old 12-13-2007, 11:44 AM
 
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Yep...first timer here. How about you? I think I was absolutely nuts right after we insem'd...but after a few days...I'm trying to take the whatever will be will be attitude. I'm TRYING at least. I saw your other post about the sperm bank you were selecting. Did you make a decision on that? You said they have a 40 family maximum?! That sounds like a lot to me too...but I don't know. I'm using PRS...and I'm pretty sure they said their's is 20. And THAT seemed like a lot to me!

DS Alexander Joseph born 6/29/09
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Old 12-13-2007, 11:45 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for responding to my question about Xytex.
Oh, sure. They're our second bank--we're switching because the first one won't ship to our home directly and we're no longer working with the midwife practice where they would deliver.

I'll share my impressions/comparisons as things move along.
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Old 12-13-2007, 12:01 PM
 
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I need to be moved to Waiting to O

at least for this cycle, we are doing a bit of a test run per se. Still waiting to get a handle on when I ovulate. If we don't catch it this month, no big deal.
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Old 12-13-2007, 12:50 PM
 
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JennM I found out I was pregnant with my son on Christmas day back in 2003. I hope you get a wonderful Christmas present.

: mama to T 9/04 and E 11/08
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Old 12-13-2007, 01:00 PM
 
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JennM, I tried in october with a different bank at my ob office, which was not a very good experience. also decided to have an open donor so i had to switch banks and find another option for insem. i have found a wonderful midwife who will help and she is registered at xytex, which is why i am researching there. also, it is important for us to have a donor who is part Cherokee like my partner and the best one I have found is at Xytex. so many decisions... so many ways to procrastinate...
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Old 12-13-2007, 01:31 PM
 
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Is it bad that I am already starting this cycle out doubting things?
I honestly don't expect at all to get pregnant this month.
I will ovulate sometime between the 17th and the 25th.
I have a hard time getting a + OPK. (Recommend a certain brand?)
I never show any clear signs of ovulation. (Starting Vitex soon though)
So ... insem when?
17, 20, and 23?
Ugh.

I wish my body worked the way it should. Stupid ovaries.
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Old 12-13-2007, 01:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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LaH, are you charting? If so and your chart's online, can you link it?
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Old 12-13-2007, 01:39 PM
 
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Now that DP and I are moving more seriously into the planning of TTC #2, I'd love to get more into this thread. I don't know where I should be though. Waiting to be ready? We're hoping to try for #2 in February.

lemurmommies, loving wife to ruvalokiteshvara, proud moms to our intact son E (12/06), and mourning the loss of our daughter Noelle (stillborn 12/08).
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Old 12-13-2007, 01:45 PM
 
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LaH, are you charting? If so and your chart's online, can you link it?
Temping?
It's all on paper charts (in a box somewhere OMGracious) but I haven't been doing it constantly like I should.
I'm starting back as soon as I can find my thermometer. I am pretty sure I know what box it is in.
I guess I should use FF. I've been using mymonthlycycles or something like that just to track my period when I started slacking on temping.
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Old 12-13-2007, 01:49 PM - Thread Starter
 
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IME, temping will really help you figure out when to insem. Cervical position might help, too.

In terms of predicting when you'll ovulate this cycle, though, lacking any real data I have no idea!
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Old 12-13-2007, 01:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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As I've said here before, for me, sperm count made a difference.
Remind me what the count was? And motility?
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Old 12-13-2007, 01:52 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Now that DP and I are moving more seriously into the planning of TTC #2, I'd love to get more into this thread. I don't know where I should be though. Waiting to be ready? We're hoping to try for #2 in February.
Woohoo! You're in!
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Old 12-13-2007, 01:53 PM
 
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IME, temping will really help you figure out when to insem. Cervical position might help, too.

In terms of predicting when you'll ovulate this cycle, though, lacking any real data I have no idea!
Cervical position?
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Old 12-13-2007, 01:57 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Cervical position?
Yep--you can read more about it here.
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Old 12-13-2007, 02:06 PM
 
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Simplelah, I would reccommend the book Essential Guide to Lesbian PRegnancy and Conception. It goes a lot into all the different ways you can track fertility and includes a lot about nutrition, etc. Come to think of it, I should read back over a couple sections.
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Old 12-13-2007, 02:20 PM
 
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Simplelah, I second and strongly recommend The Essential Guide to Lesbian Conception, Pregnancy and Birth by Stephani Brill. Another great one is Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler. The second one is great for understanding how to chart all your fertility signs including change in cervical mucus and cervical feel and position. I have no luck at all with my temps in predicting ovulation (though I do have a good thermal shift after the fact) so I used Taking Charge to learn how to do cervix gazing to time insems. The only drawback to Taking Charge is that her recommended timing for conception are all based on fresh sperm. When I was using frozen I used Taking Charge methods to pinpoint ovulation and I used The Essential Guide recommendations to time my insems with the spermcicles. This is also the methods used by our local queer midwife who has started many a queer family in our town using frozen or fresh.

Oh, also about OPKs (evil little things). I also had a hard time getting them to work for me. What ended up doing the trick was not drinking anything for five hours before a test and not peeing at all for four hours. I never did my first test before noon because LH tends to spike in the morning and it takes at least a few hours to make it to your urine. I tried several different brands all at once and found that the Target brand and First Response worked better for me than the others. Although I do think that the best brand depends on the person because I know many people who swear by ClearBlue even though I couldn't get a line on them to save my life!

Queer poly family trying since October 2006. Currently using a known donor and no medical interventions.
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