Queer TTC January 2008! - Mothering Forums

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Old 01-01-2008, 12:36 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks to Frog for keeping last month's thread!

November Queer TTC can be found here

December Queer TTC can be found here

Queer Taking a Break from TTC is here.


:A Rainbow of options!:

Waiting to O
mahrens77
2happymamas
tigermiep
mhiccup
MujerMamaMismo
JennM1021
burtsgirl
simplelah
twylightdove
knit_grrly
frog
Sugerson
astraphell
travelgirlz
simcon

Waiting to O on a day when swimmers can actually be shipped
Zyla

Waiting to Know... Braving the 2WW
baby_baby_mommy
Amigone
JenInMpls
smartycat
tiggerkong22
kjm
pranava
Coco99

Waiting to Implant
starling&diesel

Taking a Break
osker
Sprout's futuremom
FtMPapa
ktcl (and DP megincl)
QTRANDI
Sugersen
Hulahoop

Waiting to be Ready
katharinerose
lemurmommies
wannabemoms
erthe_mama
snoopy13

Waiting to be healthy / WTF is going on with my Body?...

January BFP!!!
cookie70


Past BFPs:

December BFP
Scalpel


November BFP
mamimapster
AngelaM
solejean
lmh222
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Old 01-01-2008, 02:30 PM
 
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hi everyone --

hey am i supposed to be taking the vitex (chasteberry) if i got a HPT+? i thought you weren't supposed to take it during pregnancy but i read in an article on mothering.com that it can raise your progesterone level which could help prevent miscarriage?

i have an auto immune condition and there is some thought that progesterone can decrease symptoms and that's why some women feel better during pregnancy, so that makes me wonder if my progesterone is low?

also i have a previously scheduled 1st appointment with a midwife for jan 14 where i was going to arrange for the day 20 progesterone test... now that i had a + test hopefully that means my insurance will actually pay for my medical care since they cover ZERO for pre-conception anything for non-heterosexually-married people... but do you think i should try to get the appointment moved up since i had the + test?

i'm pretty excited and now i have a whole new set of questions and thoughts and worries than i did just last night... thanks!

and CONGRATS TO mamimapster!!!! hope to be in your shoes in early april!

jd
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Old 01-01-2008, 04:10 PM
 
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snoopy congrats

When I got pregnant I wasn't expected for an appointment until I was 6 weeks along. I'd say call your midwife to find out. As for the vitex, I've read sources that say discontinue it in the 3rd tri, and some that say discontinue when you're pregnant. I discontinued it when I got pregnant but I wasn't under the care of an herbalist, so *shrug*

happy new year everyone!

: mama to T 9/04 and E 11/08
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Old 01-01-2008, 06:36 PM
 
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I will be continuing my break - seems the timing will not work out. Last month I had another 12 day luteal phase - it's been awhile...so weird...my luteal phase changes to 12 days when I am not inseming...

During these months I have felt like giving up more than ever - what a let down. I am trying to stay positive, but what a disappointing way to start the new year. We found out yesterday that our KD would be out of town when we are ovulating. Bummer! I spent New Year's Eve totally frustrated and upset. I hate not having access...my DP keeps reminding me that it will all come together when the time is right. I hope she is right...

Congrats Snoopy...how wonderful! I have heard mixed reviews on the vitex as well! Mostly I have read not to take it during the last trimester - early contractions...I was told not to take it...at all. My midwife is suspicious of it - so I had not asked her about during pregnancy.
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Old 01-01-2008, 07:54 PM
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::: :::C ongrats Snoop
::: :::

11/24/08 SMBC with a loving LTR DP in a Queer & Poly relationshiploving my new baby Kale Cqolbi Justice!!!!!
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Old 01-01-2008, 08:02 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by snoopy13 View Post
also i have a previously scheduled 1st appointment with a midwife for jan 14 where i was going to arrange for the day 20 progesterone test... now that i had a + test hopefully that means my insurance will actually pay for my medical care since they cover ZERO for pre-conception anything for non-heterosexually-married people... but do you think i should try to get the appointment moved up since i had the + test?

i'm pretty excited and now i have a whole new set of questions and thoughts and worries than i did just last night... thanks!
Hoorayy and Congrtatulations!
As for the appointment- I would advise moving it up, and asking for a progesterone test asap- if your progesterone is low, there are a variety of ways to bump it up( I've been on ALL of them in the 3+ years of TTC this babe). It will help with a sticky babe.
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Old 01-01-2008, 08:21 PM
 
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congratulation to all those with bfps... I'm new on here and have been ttc for 4 months with a KD. This cycle will be the last with this donor as he is going to China at the end of Jan... I wondered if anyone knew if using egg whites to improve EWCM was a good idea.... (i hardly get any at all and am 33 years old). Does anyone have any other good tips that would help? We havent used a speculum yet and have relied on 10 ml syringes... ty and babydust to all
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Old 01-01-2008, 10:11 PM
 
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Hello everyone ! Well this is the month that things will start for us ! I guess we should be changed to the "waiting to O" category ! Actually, I guess I am waiting for my cycle to turn one more cycle, I will O in a few days and then, when I menstruate again is when the process starts at the clinic and that O will be it ! If things are as stable as they have been, we should be trying that first insemination on the 31st of this month !!

Has anyone gone through IUI in a fertility clinic ?
How was it ?

Babydust to everyone !

Coco

Celebrating the arrival of our twins twins.gifCharlie & Chloe, born Jan 28th 2011 !

 


 

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Old 01-02-2008, 12:59 AM
 
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Yesterday was day 1 of AF......on to our next round of trying.....(and hopefully not making my gazillion eggs again!)

Here's to hoping for a 2008 baby............

Randi (and Kauleen)
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Old 01-02-2008, 01:49 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Coco99 View Post
Has anyone gone through IUI in a fertility clinic?
How was it?
Hey, Coco I conceived my son doing IUIs in a clinic (ob/gyn, not fertility) and am now doing the same trying to conceive #2. How was it? Pretty much a non-event, a lot like a pap smear, I thought. I guess some women experience cramping but I never have. What always happens at mine: they verify the donor #, go over the motility and count, whoever is doing the insem comes in (ob/gyn on call, now, used to be a CNM who always did them but she's off doing regular well woman care now), verifies the # and my DOB again, draws sample into syringe, flushes air out of catheter, inserts spec, makes a comment about fabulous mucus (every time! Without fail! ), inserts catheter, pushes sample in, flushes catheter with a small amount of saline, takes everything out, adjusts the table so my hips are up and tells me to relax for 15 minutes and then I'm free to go. Always seemed pretty unamazing/uneventful to me, must just be my luck.

: mama to T 9/04 and E 11/08
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Old 01-02-2008, 02:10 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aminxx View Post
I wondered if anyone knew if using egg whites to improve EWCM was a good idea.... (i hardly get any at all and am 33 years old). Does anyone have any other good tips that would help?
People seem to swear by Preseed, though you have to order it online in most places, as it's not widely stocked.
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Old 01-02-2008, 03:02 AM
 
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: : Congrats Snoopy!!! : :

I'm so happy for you guys, and selfishly quite happy for myself, since it means more queerspawn in Rhode Island!

Big, big hugs!

A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!

Building queer family since 2008!

(and oh, did i mention we're having twins?!?)

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Old 01-02-2008, 05:00 AM
 
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Hi everyone! I'm still happily lurking about (though I had some catch-up to do since it's been a busy month.)

Congrats to all the mamas with BFPs!!! :

Quote:
Originally Posted by frog View Post
I know I'm totally putting the cart before the horse, here, but what do you all plan to do in terms of giving birth? (A colleague had her baby today, so it's on my mind...)
Personally, I'm planning to have a home water birth with the same midwife who attended my last one. That is if my rommates don't object. Although I'm thinking about taking the hypnobabies course as well. Should be interesting at least.

I'm a queer, poly, pagan, (dis)abled, crazy, crunchy, intersectionally-minded feminist. fsonj & I are mamas to our unschooled/freeschooled 12yo & 3yo!  (Ask me about co-breastfeeding, supplementing at the breast, inducing lactation, eating placentas, undisturbed birth, and parenting a genderqueer child with Aspergers!)
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Old 01-02-2008, 08:18 AM
 
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: congrats Snoopy...and congrats again minimapster! :

One gorgeous solstice babe 12/08, two smitten mothers - mothering consciously with conscience and compassion. Birth & Postnatal Doula. Student Midwife. Expecting #2 November '12.

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Old 01-02-2008, 08:23 AM
 
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Frog, others, help me out here! The rage I am still feeling about this has me struggling to be clear and coherent.

How can I improve?

Quote:
Dear Dr H,

On Thursday 20th December ’07 I had an appointment with you that left me feeling disrespected and very disappointed.

You will recall that the primary reason for the appointment was to check my latest round of thyroid test results but that I was also concerned about my ovulation/fertility chart and questioned my low, erratic temperatures.

As we discussed my efforts to conceive via home insemination I was shocked and incredibly distressed when you suggested I consider having sex with my sperm donor. Whether it was meant in jest or not, I found your suggestion to be incredibly inappropriate and plainly homophobic. I imagine however, that such a suggestion would be equally as abhorrent to a heterosexual woman trying to conceive with donor sperm. I’d also like to point out that most research suggests that inseminating with fresh sperm results in almost the same level of success as intercourse.

I am a relatively new patient of yours and was attracted to your practice because of your progressive approach and your respect of complementary and alternative modalities of healthcare. Perhaps naively, I made the assumption that your progressive approach would carry into social relations and that you would have had some experience treating lesbian and same-sex attracted women in a sensitive and appropriate manner.

The healthcare needs of lesbians require the same level of respect and sensitivity as do those of any other woman. Those needs, however, can be vastly different. I would like to direct you to the volumes of research completed by a local GP, Dr Ruth McNair on lesbian healthcare needs. A dedicated website can be found at http://www.dialog.unimelb.edu.au/index.html. You may be particularly interested in the fertility and parenting section. Though currently on maternity leave, you may also be able to contact Dr McNair through the Carlton Clinic.

I will not be returning to your practice but know of other lesbians who do see you and think they’ll greatly benefit from your greater knowledge and sensitivity.

Yours sincerely,

One gorgeous solstice babe 12/08, two smitten mothers - mothering consciously with conscience and compassion. Birth & Postnatal Doula. Student Midwife. Expecting #2 November '12.

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Old 01-02-2008, 10:51 AM
 
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I think it's just perfect, MMM. Are you sending it just to her, or others, as well?
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Old 01-02-2008, 11:25 AM
 
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MMM, I think the letter is great. Good for you for managing to be so articulate in the midst of what is, I'm sure, lingering anger.

A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!

Building queer family since 2008!

(and oh, did i mention we're having twins?!?)

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Old 01-02-2008, 11:50 AM
 
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If you feel like you couldn't ever recommend her practice to friends who are lesbian for the treatment you received, throw that in... I put (honestly) in my letter to the PA I saw that I couldn't recommend him to friends or family because my trust in him had been ruined.

I think it is a very controlled, honest, professional and respectful letter. And I do hope that you send it to someone other than just her! Checks and balances!

Happy back-to-work day... my wife begged me for a ride to work this morning but I think it was harder for us to pack up child, etc and drive downtown than for her to bundle up and walk to the bus stop...! (It's currently 2F / -16C here).

: mama to T 9/04 and E 11/08
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Old 01-02-2008, 12:13 PM
 
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... my wife begged me for a ride to work this morning but I think it was harder for us to pack up child, etc and drive downtown than for her to bundle up and walk to the bus stop...! (It's currently 2F / -16C here).
Heh--spoken like the woman who doesn't have to stand at the bus stop! :
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Old 01-02-2008, 12:31 PM
 
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Hey thanks Jen !

I hope mine is as uneventful as yours !!

Coco
xx

Celebrating the arrival of our twins twins.gifCharlie & Chloe, born Jan 28th 2011 !

 


 

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Old 01-02-2008, 12:44 PM
 
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First, congrats to all the mamas with BFPs!!! What a great way to start the new year.
MMM, I think your letter is both clear and coherent and very articulate. Good job.
Simplelah, you can switch me to the waiting to know, although I am pretty sure we were too early. Oh well.

Happy New Year!!!
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Old 01-02-2008, 12:50 PM
 
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Don't be too hard on yourself, tigg. It's a process, trying to figure out when to insem, and sometimes it takes a while to get it right.
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Old 01-02-2008, 01:09 PM
 
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That's true frog, thanks. I think part of me wants to find reasons that it won't work so I won't be too disappointed when it doesn't. I like to worry a lot about things before it is even neccessary.
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Old 01-02-2008, 01:10 PM
 
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:::Snoopy, congratulations!!! :::

MMM, the letter is extremely professional and to the point. Well done.
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Old 01-02-2008, 01:22 PM
 
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That's true frog, thanks. I think part of me wants to find reasons that it won't work so I won't be too disappointed when it doesn't. I like to worry a lot about things before it is even neccessary.
It's a gift we share, the gift of worrying.
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Old 01-02-2008, 01:35 PM
 
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First, congrats to mamimapster and Snoopy--woohoo! And did I miss anyone else? I've been out of town, off email, and swamped with work to boot...

We are now taking a break until next month, where we might try Clomid with one of our 2 frozen vials left. Blah. I don't seem to have irregular ovulation, but for these last two tries (before we're back to fresh), I thought it might be good to have more "targets," so to speak. (My daughter is convinced we're having twins--and has been since the summer of 2006--so maybe it's time to encourage that--eek!) It's still hard to grapple with getting pg extremely quickly 2 times, and now going 15 months with no bfp. I often wonder if it will ever happen again. That said, we have a lot going on, and are lucky enough to have an amazing almost-5 year old who is just such a fun person to spend time with, so I am grateful for things as they are too--and try to focus on the present and the process rather than some desired future.

Quote:
Originally Posted by aminxx View Post
congratulation to all those with bfps... I'm new on here and have been ttc for 4 months with a KD. This cycle will be the last with this donor as he is going to China at the end of Jan... I wondered if anyone knew if using egg whites to improve EWCM was a good idea.... (i hardly get any at all and am 33 years old). Does anyone have any other good tips that would help? We havent used a speculum yet and have relied on 10 ml syringes... ty and babydust to all
Quote:
Originally Posted by frog View Post
People seem to swear by Preseed, though you have to order it online in most places, as it's not widely stocked.
To second frog, I've heard that Preseed is good too. We tried it once (though my cf is usually fine), and actually found it locally (in upstate NY). I think their website has way to search for stores that carry it.

Good luck to everyone--I'll try to keep up as I come up for air! I think my next cycle should start sometime in mid- to late January.
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Old 01-02-2008, 01:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Changes were made!

Please bold your changes. I'm losing my mind a bit



And a me update: Still just waiting.
No idea.
My gut says not pregnant.
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Old 01-02-2008, 02:24 PM
 
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Congrats Snoopy!! What a way to start the year

MMM- the letter is wonderful! Articulate, to the point, and should cause the doctor to rethink her practices.

Question: OK, I'm obsessing about my O date and whether I inseminated too late this time. Is it possible to ovulate before a +OPK, or immediately after? Fertility Friend says I O'ed on CD 15, but I didn't get a +OPK until 5pm on CD 15. Normally I O more like 36 hrs past +OPK. I just hate to think that the very month we got 3 vials so we didn't miss on the timing, I ovulated super early and screwed it all up. It's so frustrating!

Life is strange and wonderful.  Me read.gif, DP lady.gif, DS (3/09) blahblah.gif , 3 dog2.gif  and 4 cat.gif

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Old 01-02-2008, 02:25 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Coco99 View Post
Hello everyone ! Well this is the month that things will start for us ! I guess we should be changed to the "waiting to O" category ! Actually, I guess I am waiting for my cycle to turn one more cycle, I will O in a few days and then, when I menstruate again is when the process starts at the clinic and that O will be it ! If things are as stable as they have been, we should be trying that first insemination on the 31st of this month !!

Has anyone gone through IUI in a fertility clinic ?
How was it ?

Babydust to everyone !

Coco

Yep, Went to a clinic/RE and loved it. After the 3rd try we now have a positive test. They made everything so easy and as stress free as the process can be of course.

: DD 8/29/08 and twin boys 11/3/09
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Old 01-02-2008, 02:30 PM
 
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Coco, we do IUI at home (midwife comes to us) and I've never had any trouble or cramping at all.
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