The Queer & Pregnant thread - January/February 2008! - Mothering Forums

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Old 01-11-2008, 06:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hey folks,

After spending so much time bonding on the TTC thread, I thought it might be nice to have a queer-specific place to go when we "graduate" to pregnancy. Certainly we all have our Due Date Clubs, etc., but I personally find that sometimes it's really nice to have a queer-focused space to talk about pregnancy, relationships, etc.

Are people interested? If so, I'll start a members list here. Just post your name and due date, maybe?

And if this fizzles out due to lack of interest, that's okay too. Just thought I'd put it out there!

Okay folks, the list is here! If you want to be added, just post in bold with your name and due date.

Queer and Pregnant!

May 2008
Thismama, due 5/2008
mamastotwo (Liz & Janet), twins(!) due 5/2008
MsJodi (Jodi, DP Maureen), due 5/2/2008
TheGirls (Angela & Kelly), due 5/8/2008

June 2008
KK_Davey (KK, DP Annie, Baby Daddy Rob), due 6/23/2008
MollyKenzie (DP Kari), twins(!) due late June

July 2008
Mamimapster, due 7/15/2008

August 2008:
Solejean (Peggy, DP Lydia), due 8/1/2008
AngelaM (Angela), due 8/4/2008

September 2008:
Scalpel (Jess, DP Darcie), due 9/4/2008
Cookie, due 9/14/2008

October 2008:
TryingMammas, due 10/2008
Becca, due 10/16/08



Graduates!!!
NZmumof2 (Anna, DP Leah), Florence born 1/23/2008
Jentina (Jen & Sarah), Ellis Thomas born 2/20/2008



Recovering from Losses, to Rejoin Us Soon
Snoopy13 (JD)

A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!

Building queer family since 2008!

(and oh, did i mention we're having twins?!?)

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Old 01-11-2008, 07:06 PM
 
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please delete...I double posted and don't know how to delete

: DD 8/29/08 and twin boys 11/3/09
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Old 01-11-2008, 07:07 PM
 
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Sweet! Im all for it.....it seems too that when you are TTC there is alot to talk about like all the waiting and trials and tribulations but once you (or your dp) is pregnant its all quiet on the western front for awhile or until major milestones come about. A least now that is how I feel like in a lull....a happy lull but still.

I am Jess my pregnant Dp is Darcie and due September 4th 2008!!

: DD 8/29/08 and twin boys 11/3/09
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Old 01-11-2008, 08:10 PM
 
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I'm not a pregnant queer mama (yet), but I think it's great you guys have this space! You're always so nice to give advice adn support on the TTC threads, it's only fair you should be able to have a place.
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Old 01-11-2008, 09:00 PM
 
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I think it's a fabulous idea. I have been lurking in the July and August DDC's but it would be nice to have a queer friendly space to talk about pregnancy. Thanks for putting this out there AngelaM!

I am Peggy (DP Lydia) and I am due 8/1/08.

Number # 2 due 5/19/2011.
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Old 01-11-2008, 09:36 PM
 
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yeah, i went to the "I'm pregnant" board and the due date club and did not really feel "at home" there, to be honest...

thanks Angela!

JD
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Old 01-11-2008, 09:48 PM
 
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hi, this will be my first post of substance to this list...

i'm having a hard day today.

a few days ago, i felt numbness in my right fingers. a few years back i would have thought i slept wrong... but last year, almost exactly a year ago, about 80% of my body got numb over a 72 hour period after 3 months of weird itching/burning symptoms in different parts of my body.

it turned out i had/have myelitis, which is inflammation in the myelin sheath of the spine. they had tested me for tons of things, including a brain MRI, for the initial symptoms and never found anything -- but when i went numb they did a neck MRI and saw the lesions (swelling) in 2 places.

i went on IV steroids for 5 days and oral for 1, got an icky spinal tap, etc etc etc. they never found a viral or bacterial cause, and given weird episodes of fatigue/chronic pain i'd had in my 20's and early 30's, it was decided that it's auto-immune. i was on neuropathy meds for months that made me feel stoned, and had to wean off of them which was hard too.

and if i get a second "episode" (NOT just recurrence of these symptoms, but something else like trouble walking, double vision, etc), i have MS. my neurologist thinks there's only about a 20% chance of that happening.

so...

over the past few days the numbness has been climbing up my right hand and into my forearm, my left fingertips are numb, and as of a few hours ago it's in my feet, particularily the right side.

it's not disabling -- it just feels like a moderate case of "my hand is asleep," etc. and it doesn't count as a new "episode."

but it sure is disappointing.

i've continued to have off and on fatigue and mild-moderate chronic pain since the numbness disappeared last spring... BUT getting pregnant really seemed to help, which is a phenomenon they've seen in autoimmune stuff that may have to do with progesterone or estriol. i've been rather un-achy and that has felt great.

but now this.

both my massage therapist (who i saw today and who specializes in prenatal massage) and my neurologist think it could be triggered by hormonal fluctuations. but the neuro wants to see me ASAP, and may ask me to get the MRI he originally said we could postpone till after delivery when i told him i was trying to conceive. (he had also said, when i told him i was pregnant, that we did not have to do ANYTHING different in terms of prenatal care, which made me feel great.) going to the neuro on wednesday.

so i just need to hang in there and not freak out.

but it sure helps swing my swinging mood a little bit harder...

bleah.

the other hard thing that happened today is i went with my partner to buy me a sports bra -- this is the first time i went bra shopping since i was 13 or 14 years old. on the street i generally pass at first glance or second glance about 80% of the time, have gotten cruised by gay men, etc. and that's just great by me.

but i'm getting sore in yoga due to this (still relatively minor) growth and aching... so we thought we'd give the sportsbra a try.

so i'm standing in the dressing room and all of them feel AWFUL. my partner points out that it may not be that they don't fit, it's that i have to get used to wearing them. but i don't want to wear them or get used to wearing them. it bothered me a lot more than i thought it would.

and that's when my feet started getting numb, as an added bonus.

so that's my day. i'm waiting for my friends to come by to take me out to dinner but i also feel like crawling into a dark deep hole...

JD
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Old 01-12-2008, 12:04 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Awesome, I'm glad to see some familiar faces, and I'm glad I'm not the only one who hasn't quite felt "at home" in the DDCs.

Snoopy- I'm so sorry that you're dealing this numbness stuff again. I really, really, really hope that this is a random, passing symptom, with no great repercussions for your pregnancy or your health in general.

I also hear you on the bra thing. While I've always had to wear a bra, I had a breast reduction eight years ago, which improved my quality of life by about a million-fold. Now, as I watch my boobs swell back up to pre-surgery size, I just feel bloated and depressed about it.

Solejean- You and I are due within days of each other! I'm not really relishing being hugely pregnant in July, though I did just join a gym with an indoor/outdoor pool, primarily so that I can sit on the deck and float around in the water come the hot weather.

So, my exciting news is that I had my first ultrasound this week, and saw the baby! It was pretty amazing and special, and definitely made me feel more bonded and connected to the whole thing than I'd yet been feeling. We could see its arms and legs moving around, and its heart beating. Amazing!

A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!

Building queer family since 2008!

(and oh, did i mention we're having twins?!?)

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Old 01-12-2008, 12:17 AM
 
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I'm due in May!

Well actually very end of April but my daughter was 2 weeks late so I'm expecting (and hoping for!!) a May baby who arrives soon after uni exams are completed.
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Old 01-12-2008, 03:50 PM
 
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snoopy13

AngelaM - That must have been so cool to see the baby moving around. I also am not thrilled to think about being huge in July. I have an above ground pool in my backyard, but I'm not sure about climbing the ladder. But there is a local pool so maybe I'll have to check into using that. I've heard that swimming when you are in your last months is wonderful.


thismama May babies are great... not that I'm biased or anything. (my BD is 5/7).

Number # 2 due 5/19/2011.
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Old 01-14-2008, 01:10 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by snoopy13 View Post
the other hard thing that happened today is i went with my partner to buy me a sports bra -- this is the first time i went bra shopping since i was 13 or 14 years old. on the street i generally pass at first glance or second glance about 80% of the time, have gotten cruised by gay men, etc. and that's just great by me.

but i'm getting sore in yoga due to this (still relatively minor) growth and aching... so we thought we'd give the sportsbra a try.

so i'm standing in the dressing room and all of them feel AWFUL. my partner points out that it may not be that they don't fit, it's that i have to get used to wearing them. but i don't want to wear them or get used to wearing them. it bothered me a lot more than i thought it would.
I totally get how a butch/passing mama would not feel good about the whole idea of a bra period. Have you looked into what they call "tank bras"-possibly even getting a tank nursing bra? Even though they have Femme-ey straps they kind of feel a bit more like an undershirt with a bra shelf built in, and if you get the nursing ones they can do double duty in the future. if you get one that is bigger/longer than your normal size they might also help support the belly when you are larger and still doing yoga.
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Old 01-14-2008, 01:12 AM
 
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Oh yeah, i'd love to be on the sticky for this thread-EDD is 7/15-I anticipate being late though.
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Old 01-14-2008, 11:58 AM
 
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Hi everyone! I'm Jodi, my partner is Maureen, and I am due on May 2nd! I'll be 25 weeks along on Wednesday. This has been a crazy long road for us.

Angela, thank you so much for starting this thread. I think it's a great idea. I've been participating in my DDC, but there are definitely so many things that are specific to being a queer pregnant lady or the partner of a queer pregnant lady. So glad to be able to come here and talk to you ladies about it!

Snoopy, I'm so sorry that you are having to deal with these physical issues on top of being pregnant. My experience has been that pregnancy puts everything else under a microscope- emotional and physical. I hope you feel better soon.
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Old 01-14-2008, 12:01 PM
 
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[So, my exciting news is that I had my first ultrasound this week, and saw the baby! It was pretty amazing and special, and definitely made me feel more bonded and connected to the whole thing than I'd yet been feeling. We could see its arms and legs moving around, and its heart beating. Amazing![/QUOTE]

Aren't the ultrasounds unbelievable?? I had one the other day and my little girl was sucking her thumb! I could see her little cheeks moving in and out... absolutely amazing!
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Old 01-14-2008, 06:45 PM
 
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OK, me too!

I'm also Angela. My partner is Kelly, and we're expecting a girl May 6, 2008.

Solejean, I've always needed a bra, but DP can pass most of the time (gets hollered at in the restroom occasionally....) She swears by the sportsbras at Target. They're very soft and not too binding. They're not supportive enough for me (I'm a size H now...) but they're plenty for her (B/C cup), and cheap and easy to find to boot.

Also, www.decentexposures.com makes a dowdy looking but very comfortable custom sized bra. They're pricier than the target ones, but very customizable, which may help with the comfort.

ribbonrainbow.gif: mamas to one DD (5/08) and two DS's (11/9/10 @ 35wks)
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Old 01-14-2008, 08:29 PM
 
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Good you for starting this up Angela! I've felt not really part of the ttc thread for ages (the temping thing etc feels so far away now) but haven't wanted to give it up because it's my only link to queer ttc/pregnancy. So this is perfect for me. Yay!!

My due date is 23/06/2008, and my name is kk. My partner is Annie and our baby-daddy is Rob (we all live together).

What on earth are Due Date Clubs?! Never heard of them. Should I have one? I'm not a very on-to-it pregnant person I don't think!

And what's a passing mama? I know what butch is, obviously, but I've never heard of 'passing'? It must be an American thing...I got a bit to learn here obviously!

Snoopy - that's full on! I can't imaging having to deal with that stuff in addition to trying to focus on a positive/healthy pregnancy. I had a similar-sounding numbness, but confined to my arms and sometime my legs. They also thought MS was a possibility and did MRIs etc etc. It wasn't MS but they never did figure out what it is. So now I just live with it and it comes and goes. Knowing how stressful that ordeal was for me, I really can't imagine having to deal with what you're dealing with. It sounds like you have an amazing approach and are dealing with it all fantastically. It's comforting that they say it's probably due to hormonal fluctuations - which makes sense really, particularly given it can stop the aches, so it obviously has the ability to affect your symptoms.
I hope it all works out fine - great that you don't have to approach the pregnancy any differently.

Angela - your ultrasound sounds awesome! I loved my 12 week one - you could see him/her 'sitting' there with ankles crossed and playing with the amniotic fluid. It was all so real! I get my next ultrasound in a few weeks (1st Feb) to find out the sex. I'm so impatient for it - it feels like there's so many days between now and then and they just won't go away fast enough! Imagine if I actually had a preference for girl/boy, which I don't at all!

Ok, alive baby crying and I can no longer ignore it. I'm so excited to have found this thread - yay for Angela!!
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Old 01-14-2008, 08:39 PM
 
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I have a question for y'all...well, for those of you with partners anyways...

What you are going to call each of the 2 mums? Are you both going to be called mum, or one of you mum while the other gets called by their first name, etc etc.

At the moment Annie's being mum and I'm being ma, but Ali's so little that it's well open for change still. I'm not positive we've hit on the best strategy yet. So I thought I'd get some ideas from you guys.
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Old 01-14-2008, 09:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hey, it's so great to see all of these familiar faces here!

KK, I'm so glad that your pregnancy is going well. I've been thinking about you. A due date club is a group of people all due in the same month. If you go to the "I'm Pregnant" section of MDC you'll see a link to the due date clubs. Mine is fine, but definitely pretty straight!

Welcome everyone! I'll be back later with more...

A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!

Building queer family since 2008!

(and oh, did i mention we're having twins?!?)

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Old 01-14-2008, 09:17 PM
 
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My due date is 23/06/2008, and my name is kk. My partner is Annie and our baby-daddy is Rob (we all live together).

Congrats to all of you!

Quote:
Originally Posted by kk_davey View Post
And what's a passing mama? I know what butch is, obviously, but I've never heard of 'passing'? It must be an American thing...I got a bit to learn here obviously!

that means that I "pass" as male a lot of the time, especially with people who are less familiar with what dykes can look like! I still use the womens rest room but i often get shit for it... I'm not actually sure I'm "mama" identified, I'm definitely not a lady... guess I'll see how it feels when the kid is here. I identify as somewhere between butch and trans -- I don't have a preferred pronoun, for example.

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Snoopy - that's full on! I can't imaging having to deal with that stuff in addition to trying to focus on a positive/healthy pregnancy. I had a similar-sounding numbness, but confined to my arms and sometime my legs. They also thought MS was a possibility and did MRIs etc etc. It wasn't MS but they never did figure out what it is. So now I just live with it and it comes and goes. Knowing how stressful that ordeal was for me, I really can't imagine having to deal with what you're dealing with. It sounds like you have an amazing approach and are dealing with it all fantastically. It's comforting that they say it's probably due to hormonal fluctuations - which makes sense really, particularly given it can stop the aches, so it obviously has the ability to affect your symptoms.
wow, thanks for sharing that with me. it stopped progressing for a few days and then today it escalated in my left hand and up my right leg... it's super weird but there's nothing they'd be able to do (even like an MRI) in the first trimester anyway. It's not painful or anything, just annoying. I'm going to the neurologist on Wednesday, so that's good, I like him a lot.

did you go through all that when you had your child in your life already, or was it before that? how often does it come and go? Did you have a "flare up" after delivery? hope the questions are ok, and feel free to PM me if you'd prefer.


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Angela - your ultrasound sounds awesome! I loved my 12 week one - you could see him/her 'sitting' there with ankles crossed and playing with the amniotic fluid. It was all so real! I get my next ultrasound in a few weeks (1st Feb) to find out the sex. I'm so impatient for it - it feels like there's so many days between now and then and they just won't go away fast enough! Imagine if I actually had a preference for girl/boy, which I don't at all!
We're going for my first ultrasound 2/1, which is just 8 weeks into it, so i think it's too early to see a beating heart, right? I was thinking to ask them to hold off a few weeks if the only purpose is to nail down due date -- as we've pretty much got that nailed down due to our certainty about when we inseminated!! but on the other hand, to be able to confirm that there's the right kind of development happening in there, even this early on, would be great.

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Ok, alive baby crying and I can no longer ignore it. I'm so excited to have found this thread - yay for Angela!!
i agree!!!!!!

JD
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Old 01-14-2008, 09:21 PM
 
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What you are going to call each of the 2 mums? Are you both going to be called mum, or one of you mum while the other gets called by their first name, etc etc.
we haven't figured this out yet. i feel like i will either be mom or something non-traditional/non-gendered. i think my partner may be mommy or maybe mom if i'm not mom...

JD
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Old 01-15-2008, 06:06 AM
 
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Hi guys,

I shouldn't really bother joining, but just wanted to briefly be part of this group. I'm pregnant with our third child, who was due on the 13th so I shouldn't have more than another week to be part of the pregnant queer thread!

I'm hoping for a VBAC so have been tryign acupuncture, evening primose oil and every old wives tale about labour encouragement ever, not even a niggle yet though, I'll have an elective c section towards the end of next week if nothing happens by then but I'm hopeful something will.

Our sons are so excited and really want the baby to come out! We are having a surprise so they can't wait to see if it is a girl or a boy.
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Old 01-15-2008, 08:37 AM
 
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that means that I "pass" as male a lot of the time, especially with people who are less familiar with what dykes can look like! I still use the womens rest room but i often get shit for it... I'm not actually sure I'm "mama" identified, I'm definitely not a lady... guess I'll see how it feels when the kid is here. I identify as somewhere between butch and trans -- I don't have a preferred pronoun, for example.
Oh right, yeah that makes sense. People get confused with me occasionally, which always surprises me. People are just so goddamn ignorant.

I've found it really weird being pregnant just because it seems like such a feminine state to be in, and I totally don't identify with being feminine. It's been a real process for me. And all of the pregnancy magazines/books etc are so stereotyped that it's impossible for me to feel like part of the general pregnant community, if that makes sense. It's been such a long time since I felt on the outer like this that it's taken me by surprise.

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wow, thanks for sharing that with me. it stopped progressing for a few days and then today it escalated in my left hand and up my right leg... it's super weird but there's nothing they'd be able to do (even like an MRI) in the first trimester anyway. It's not painful or anything, just annoying. I'm going to the neurologist on Wednesday, so that's good, I like him a lot.

did you go through all that when you had your child in your life already, or was it before that? how often does it come and go? Did you have a "flare up" after delivery? hope the questions are ok, and feel free to PM me if you'd prefer.
I don't mind the questions at all! Ali wasn't born - or conceived - when all the tests etc were being done. I think it would have been hard to do both simultaneously. 2 such big and very different foci. And I actually wasn't pregnant with Ali, Annie was, so I'm not much help on the questions re symptoms during and post delivery.

I find my symptoms get much worse when I'm stressed with work or something, and probably phase in and out over a period of several months. It's most severe when I'm sleeping - sometimes I wake up to completely numb arms and legs (not at all related to sleeping position), which can be quite painful while the feeling is slowly creeping back & going through full on pins and needles etc. Because it's not so bad when I'm awake (as long as I'm not spending too much time on computers) I don't find it interferes with looking after Ali at all.

I haven't noticed any particular change with pregnancy though, unlike you from the sounds? I don't think anything I've said is particularly useful for you though? Sorry!


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We're going for my first ultrasound 2/1, which is just 8 weeks into it, so i think it's too early to see a beating heart, right? I was thinking to ask them to hold off a few weeks if the only purpose is to nail down due date -- as we've pretty much got that nailed down due to our certainty about when we inseminated!! but on the other hand, to be able to confirm that there's the right kind of development happening in there, even this early on, would be great.
I had a dating scan at a similar time and you could hear the heart beat. Doesn't it start beating at about week 6, or have I made that up?! I was surprised they gave me a dating scan because I knew all the dates to the day, so it was entirely unnecessary! But I was stoked to have the chance to 'see' the baby, which looked like a tiny blob in the middle of the screen, with a flashing pixel where the heart was - it was awesome just to make it more real.
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Old 01-15-2008, 11:57 AM
 
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I had a dating scan at a similar time and you could hear the heart beat. Doesn't it start beating at about week 6, or have I made that up?! I was surprised they gave me a dating scan because I knew all the dates to the day, so it was entirely unnecessary! But I was stoked to have the chance to 'see' the baby, which looked like a tiny blob in the middle of the screen, with a flashing pixel where the heart was - it was awesome just to make it more real.[/QUOTE]

Yup! You can almost always see the heart beating during ultrasound after 6 weeks. That was so cool for us... it looked like the whole little blob was thumping!

I've had some issues with all the various books and magazines out there too. Everything refers to your "husband" and has sections for "Dad" to read. I really want dp to be part of the research-y stuff that I do, but reading those books just makes her feel alienated...

As for what dd-to-be will call us? I have no idea. I guess we'll let her decide. Probably some variations of mom, ma, mama, mommy for each of us!
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Old 01-15-2008, 12:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Welcome NZmumof2!

I hope that your stay here is very short and sweet, especially if that keeps you in VBAC territory!

A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!

Building queer family since 2008!

(and oh, did i mention we're having twins?!?)

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Old 01-15-2008, 06:56 PM
 
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Hi guys,

I shouldn't really bother joining, but just wanted to briefly be part of this group. I'm pregnant with our third child, who was due on the 13th so I shouldn't have more than another week to be part of the pregnant queer thread!

I'm hoping for a VBAC so have been tryign acupuncture, evening primose oil and every old wives tale about labour encouragement ever, not even a niggle yet though, I'll have an elective c section towards the end of next week if nothing happens by then but I'm hopeful something will.

Our sons are so excited and really want the baby to come out! We are having a surprise so they can't wait to see if it is a girl or a boy.
Your lucky boys! I was the youngest of 4, and always so desperately wanted a younger baby to play with! I couldn't possibly not find out the sex - far too exciting for my level of patience! I admire your self control!

What's a VBAC? I've seen it come up a few times but never have any idea. Is it something to do with a vaginal birth??

Good luck with hanging in there for it!
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Old 01-16-2008, 02:03 AM
 
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we haven't figured this out yet. i feel like i will either be mom or something non-traditional/non-gendered. i think my partner may be mommy or maybe mom if i'm not mom...

JD
Have a "different" name....One of my friends has a mom that EVERYONE, including me, call Honey. Why should the name be mommy or a derivative? I think it is ultra cool to have a somewhat offbeat name for yourself. What about Sugar? Or Mimi? Ya know. Something interesting.
My best friends are lesbians and they chose Mama and Mommy, and now that their son is seven, it is VERY difficult to tell who he's asking for (usually quite loudly LOL he's my godson and can do no wrong). Anyway, they wish that one of them had chosen a really different name.
Just my two cents!
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Old 01-16-2008, 12:12 PM
 
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Have a "different" name....One of my friends has a mom that EVERYONE, including me, call Honey. Why should the name be mommy or a derivative? I think it is ultra cool to have a somewhat offbeat name for yourself. What about Sugar? Or Mimi? Ya know. Something interesting.
My best friends are lesbians and they chose Mama and Mommy, and now that their son is seven, it is VERY difficult to tell who he's asking for (usually quite loudly LOL he's my godson and can do no wrong). Anyway, they wish that one of them had chosen a really different name.
Just my two cents!
I know personally I have always wanted to be a mother, and being called a derivative of that is very natural. As for dp, I think it's difficult enough to feel validated as a queer nonbio mom in our culture, and calling her "Sugar" instead of anything related to parenting would only serve to make that more difficult. We are going to have to fight for her recognition in our extended families and the world at large...

Along the same lines, I am changing my last name to dp's, and the dc will have that name as well. As a feminist, I always swore that I would never give up my name. But as a queer family in America, we have to fight for equality and respect and validation on a daily basis, and changing my name is one more thing I can do.

So for me, all of that is vastly more consequential than other people not being sure who dd is asking for, kwim?
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Old 01-16-2008, 01:39 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I know personally I have always wanted to be a mother, and being called a derivative of that is very natural. As for dp, I think it's difficult enough to feel validated as a queer nonbio mom in our culture, and calling her "Sugar" instead of anything related to parenting would only serve to make that more difficult. We are going to have to fight for her recognition in our extended families and the world at large...

So for me, all of that is vastly more consequential than other people not being sure who dd is asking for, kwim?
Yes, I agree with this. I'm single parenting, so I have a whole different set of family-recognition issues, but I agree that as queer families, we have to work significantly harder to make sure that society in general recognizes and understands our families. And I think that especially for non-bio moms, using non-traditional names like "Honey" or "Sugar" makes it all that much easier for the rest of the world to consider those parents "not the real mom."

It's hard. As someone who is politically committed to making space in society for families that fall outside the two-parent norm, I recognize that just as not all families have a mommy and daddy, not all queer families have two moms. I want a language, a vocabulary, that gives us the tools for imagining all sorts of family structures. And I've certainly dated a lot of women who would be more comfortable being called "Dad" than "Mom." But I also see the importance, as MsJodi said, of labeling our families in ways that bring them some sort of mainstream recognition, and allows the general public to understand that in two-mom families, both people are equal partners and equal parents.

A, partner to J, mama to O, now with a new username!

Building queer family since 2008!

(and oh, did i mention we're having twins?!?)

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Old 01-16-2008, 03:01 PM
 
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We have an apt on the 28th to get my Dp's name changed to mine. Also finally get wills in place and put her name on the title of our house. I just want everything to be in line for the arrival of our little one and for my dp to be protected if something should happen to me.

Also our first u/s is on friday (7wks)...I am so excited!!!

: DD 8/29/08 and twin boys 11/3/09
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Old 01-16-2008, 04:07 PM
 
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We have an apt on the 28th to get my Dp's name changed to mine. Also finally get wills in place and put her name on the title of our house. I just want everything to be in line for the arrival of our little one and for my dp to be protected if something should happen to me.

Also our first u/s is on friday (7wks)...I am so excited!!!
Wow! You guys have got your ducks in a row! Good for you. I am 26 weeks today and am starting to feel overwhelmed and constricted by time. We have gotten the ball rolling on the 2nd parent adoption and are awaiting the home visit. I know we need to do wills and living wills. What other paperwork do we need to complete? I saw a list somewhere, but I didn't copy it and now I can't find it!

And GOOD LUCK on your ultrasound on Friday! The first one is SO SO SO exciting... you will probably be able to see the little heart beating... can't wait to hear about it!
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