my baby hates being worn :-( - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 16 Old 01-19-2013, 10:49 PM - Thread Starter
 
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any advice for me? my ds now 9 weeks absolutely hates being worn and really doesn't like being held that much either. He loves lying on the ground and sleeping in his bassinet (next to my bed) there isn't anything wrong with him, it's just his personality. I'm wondering whether I should be respecting his nature and just going with the stroller or if there is anything else I can try. He is a very smiley non demanding baby  so I don't think it is an emotional issue. I practise ap where possible (responding to all his needs etc) but I guess this is not one of his needs???

 

Also I wore my dd up to 2 yrs with no drama - I have tried a sling, ergo and moby wrap. I'm a confident baby wearer and I'd love to wear this one too!

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#2 of 16 Old 01-20-2013, 01:57 AM
 
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My only advice is to keep periodically trying different carries and different carriers and maybe he'll grow to like it.

I guess you've tried all the usual things - fed, changed, sleepy, not sleepy, outside, brisk walking?

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#3 of 16 Old 01-20-2013, 08:34 AM
 
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They really are just all different. Each child has their unique personality. I would encourage letting your baby take the lead and not forcing him. He sounds like a delightful baby. My youngest hated to be worn. He's not a snuggler and I think he was uncomfortable iin the various carriers I tried and I had worn 4 babies so I thought I knew what I was doing. He just prefers other ways of getting around. He loves to be looking at us and talking to us but not physically touching us. I've also noticed that he sleeps better not physically touching me. I've come to terms with respecting his needs and preferences.

That being said, I would try some different carriers from time to time and see if you find one he likes. Maybe you could borrow some different options. The other thing I've learned about babies is just when you think you have them figured out they surprise you. As he gets older he might end up liking to be carried on your back or hip.

Enjoy your laid back baby. His personality may make it easier for big sister to have mommy time too.
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#4 of 16 Old 01-20-2013, 10:06 AM
 
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My 9-week old wasn't really into being worn, either. He later liked the carrier, at around 5 months.

You ARE responding to his needs by paying attention to his likes and dislikes! Maybe he just has a need to chill by himself and that's just how he rolls.
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#5 of 16 Old 01-20-2013, 10:37 AM
 
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Yeah, my little girl protested the sling at 5 weeks, which was right around when she could hold her head up longer and look around a bit more.  I tried different carries, but at around six weeks she'd start screaming if I even picked her up while I was wearing the sling.  So, I respected that and left her alone.  She still wanted to be carried occasionally, but not in a carrier, just my arms.  Mostly she was happy to lay on her back, look around and play with her fingers.

 

Now she's four months old and we tried the sling again a few times for short walks and she tolerates it well enough, though I think it restricts her movement more than she likes.

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#6 of 16 Old 01-20-2013, 10:43 AM
 
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I learned to babywear out of necessity...my kids refused to be put down.  I think if I had a child like yours I wouldn't know what to do with myself!  haha  Be happy that you have the freedom to go pee without a baby on your lap and as time goes on, if the personailty changes, give it another go with the sling.


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#7 of 16 Old 01-20-2013, 11:22 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by moving toward View Post

any advice for me? my ds now 9 weeks absolutely hates being worn and really doesn't like being held that much either. He loves lying on the ground and sleeping in his bassinet (next to my bed) there isn't anything wrong with him, it's just his personality. I'm wondering whether I should be respecting his nature and just going with the stroller or if there is anything else I can try. He is a very smiley non demanding baby  so I don't think it is an emotional issue. I practise ap where possible (responding to all his needs etc) but I guess this is not one of his needs???

Also I wore my dd up to 2 yrs with no drama - I have tried a sling, ergo and moby wrap. I'm a confident baby wearer and I'd love to wear this one too!

My baby hated being worn until he was about three months old then he was cool with it and I wear him all the time. Just try again later; he'll go for it eventually.
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#8 of 16 Old 01-21-2013, 10:19 AM
 
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What carrier are you using and if it offers multiple positions what position are you wearing baby in? Did you have a c/section, was baby breech or have a difficult birth?

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#9 of 16 Old 01-22-2013, 02:35 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blessedwithboys View Post

I learned to babywear out of necessity...my kids refused to be put down.  I think if I had a child like yours I wouldn't know what to do with myself!  haha  Be happy that you have the freedom to go pee without a baby on your lap and as time goes on, if the personailty changes, give it another go with the sling.

Haha that was sooo us!  DD was super needy until she was able to crawl and get around on her own, then it was see you later mom!

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#10 of 16 Old 01-22-2013, 02:45 PM
 
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My 9 week old is the same way! He loves to be worn if he's sleeping but when he's awake, he wriggles and whines until I take him out. DS1 was the same way.... No matter if its the Ergo, sling, wrap, whatever!
Sometimes I have to ignore the whining and make my babe stay in but 90% of the time I let the poor kid out wink1.gif He likes to sit and watch when he's happy or be held if he's fussy.

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#11 of 16 Old 01-30-2013, 06:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi all thanks so much for the tips!

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Originally Posted by TiffanyToo View Post

What carrier are you using and if it offers multiple positions what position are you wearing baby in? Did you have a c/section, was baby breech or have a difficult birth?

 

I've tried an ergo, moby wrap and a mini monkey sling - I'm seriously not buying another one!  I had a natural water birth with no dramas, but baby was breech to 39 weeks then posterior till the day of his birth (turned that morning). Think I'm just going to relax about it and ignore any disapproving stares I get when I put him in the buggy...

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#12 of 16 Old 01-31-2013, 10:58 AM
 
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Do you breastfeed? Does the baby show a preference to one breast over the other?  Babies sometimes are out of alignment because of utero, birth position, birth trauma. These babies tend to show a breast side preference and sometimes hold their heads to one side more than the other. Sometimes baby will not be happy in a carrier because of this. 

If it is not this I would try again maybe use a different position in the carrier.  I would suggest you go back to the Moby and try a wrap cross carry. I do not advocate a cradle carry in a sling. The ergo may be just to big for your baby right now. 


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#13 of 16 Old 01-31-2013, 12:46 PM
 
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I too would just keep trying periodically. DD did not like carriers until she could forward face, she just wanted to see what was going on, she didn't like being carried in arms anyway except facing out most of the time etiher. Nothing wrong with using a stroller if he enjoys it, my DD enjoys her stroller a lot and I don't hesitate to use it!

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#14 of 16 Old 02-01-2013, 10:09 AM
 
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Um I don't know if I.am broken but my son hated it. So after the Moby, ergo, baby Bjorn, and a number of ring and home made slings I.gave up. I spent hundreds of dollars and he hated every one. I would just carry him a lot. His personality is very independent. He was to move freely and look and touch and just got frustrated in them. I see nothing wrong with not wearing him if he is not a fan. Sure try periodically but don't waste more money or make him do it. Every once and a while he would give up and sit in one for 15 minutes before getting mad and trying to Houdini out. It's fine.
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#15 of 16 Old 02-03-2013, 12:56 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks LLQ1011 - I think thats how I'm going too.

 

Tifanny too - yes I do bf and as a matter of course I took him to an osteopath for treatment of potential birth trauma and his positioning at 2 weeks old - he hasn't had an issues at all.

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#16 of 16 Old 02-03-2013, 02:13 PM
 
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he may just be more independant, my last baby(#4) didnt really care much for co sleeping or baby wearing. i thought it was odd but as she has grown she has just shown a very independant personality. all my others co slept and were worn all the time. 

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