Friends using Snuglis/Björns - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 18 Old 02-17-2014, 12:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi!

 

I'm wondering what you would do.

 

I have a friend (not a very close friend, but more than an acquaintance) who just had a baby. She has already told me how much she is looking forward to wearing her daughter, which is great, but she is planning on using mainly a Snugli. I know there are some issues around hip dysplasia (sp?) with the carriers that support mainly from the crotch. Should I say something or mind my own buisness? If she weren't planning on wearing her often, I wouldn't mention it, but she really wants to wear her often. What would you do? Is the hip thing that bad? 

 

Thanks!:)

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#2 of 18 Old 02-17-2014, 09:41 PM
 
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That's are hard spot to be in. I may such say" you know some of the carriers cause (this) you may want to. Research the one you are going to use".
This may allow them to find out for themselves.
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#3 of 18 Old 02-18-2014, 10:50 AM
 
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Some people would really appreciate you speaking up, while others will not be receptive to what you have to say. I guess it's up to you whether or not you think it's worth the risk of her getting upset at you. If she's generally open to new information, and less likely to be close-minded when presented with opposing views, give it a shot.

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#4 of 18 Old 02-18-2014, 11:26 AM
 
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Generally people.are.more.receptive when you acknowledge how far they have come. I would say something like, "Wow, its awesome you have a carrier. It took me a lot of.work to figure out everything. All that stuff about head position and breathing/oxygen levels, hip displaysia, and crotch dangling issues, not to mention my back! I finally discovered a wrap worked best for me and my baby in the early days. I'll be interested to hear how your journey with the snugli goes! Oh, but, hey, I tried a ton of carriers, so if you ever want to experiment, feel free to borrow any of mine". Then, see if she takes the bait, if not, drop it. You have planted a seed. And, really snuglis are so uncomfortable, I'll bet she doesn't last long anyway.

I have been known to walk up to people at the grocery store and compliment them on how they have their baby's airway nice and lined up. I express relief to see how they are paying attention to that, since so many don't know how the oxygen levels in a newborn drop when the head is tucked. It's my own little PSA, and I have noticed the wearer usually didnt know and it was coincidence.
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#5 of 18 Old 02-18-2014, 11:31 AM
 
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Could you bring it up over the issue of comfort?  I had a snugli and boy did it hurt!  I don't know if risk of hip dysplasia would be an issue as much as the idea that she just wouldn't do it.  I only wore DD1 for a short morning walk from about 3-6 months; when DD2 was about 3 months I got an ergo because I really needed to wear her a lot and at only 11 lbs, it just hurt too much.  I really wish I had good carriers from the start.

 

Can you afford to gift her something nice?  Is she open to used?

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#6 of 18 Old 02-18-2014, 10:18 PM
 
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I had a lady say she loved using a carrier but she couldn't for long with her bjorn because it hurt you can mention that there are carriers that are better for your back and better for the baby's comfort without all that plastic.

She ended up getting a meitai

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#7 of 18 Old 02-19-2014, 08:07 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for all your answers!

 

I mentionned it casually (in a conversation about many other things) and mentionned how happy I was with my Ergo. But she was kinda like "whatever", so I will be dropping the subject I guess. When talking to her before, I felt like we had similar styles of parenting, but from what I can tell, I might have been mistaken. I think I was a bit too enthusiastic to have w new parent friend lol

 

For better and worse, she said she wasn't planning on baby wearing much after all:(

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#8 of 18 Old 02-19-2014, 10:33 AM
 
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I would suggest they borrow one of yours for a little bit to see if they like it better and if they do, maybe get a lightly used one for them as a gift. It would be a good way for them to become curious and research it themselves.

My sister is having her first baby in April and has an Infantino on her registry. I'm hoping to GOD that no one gets it for her. I'm going to get her a carrier that will be better for her baby and has a higher weight tolerance.


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#9 of 18 Old 02-22-2014, 08:34 AM
 
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Perhaps she'll come around once she has some experience babywearing under her belt and maybe she'll remember how enthusiastic you were and approach you later! You never know!!
Also from what I understand hip dysplasia is mostly an issue in forward facing the baby w/o the proper support.


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#10 of 18 Old 02-27-2014, 05:40 AM
 
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Does she already own these or is she planning on buying? If she's planning on buying I would just say "Oh, those are nice but you can get an infamnto ____ for about the same price and they are so much more comfortable!"

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#11 of 18 Old 02-27-2014, 07:17 AM - Thread Starter
 
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She got the bjorn at her baby shower. 

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#12 of 18 Old 02-27-2014, 09:24 AM
 
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Narrow based carriers don't cause hip displasia. They can make it worse if the baby already has issues. So if her baby is healthy, I wouldn't worry about it. The real issue with those carriers is that they're super uncomfortable which often leads people to believe they "can't" babywear.

If she starts to find it uncomfortable, there's your chance to suggest some better carriers! smile.gif
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#13 of 18 Old 03-04-2014, 11:37 AM
 
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I tend to share how insanely comfortable and versatile the Ergo is when the subject of babywearing comes up!

 

Ex; the fact that both DH and I can wear it and quickly adjust it to fit our individual bodies

that I can quickly whip it around to back carry if I need my hands free for our 4 year old

that the back carry is wicked comfortable and so useful while making dinner.

 

And I'm always sure to share that it is the single most useful baby item we own AND that you can get them more cheaply on Craigslist or ebay.  

Aside from that I don't think you can say much more without interfering...

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#14 of 18 Old 03-04-2014, 01:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mariee View Post
 

I tend to share how insanely comfortable and versatile the Ergo is when the subject of babywearing comes up!

 

And I'm always sure to share that it is the single most useful baby item we own AND that you can get them more cheaply on Craigslist or ebay.  

 

 

I know!!!! DS is napping in the Ergo right now. I don't even understand how non babywearing parents manage (where do they put the baby?!?). I just can't conceive my life without my Ergo (we bought it used too). Unless my friend asks for advice I have really dropped the subject though. 

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#15 of 18 Old 03-17-2014, 01:07 PM
 
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Funny this topic came up--I was in Target the other day wearing my baby in an Ergo, and I had a mother come up to me and confess that she was interested in babywearing.  She said she had seen other people doing it and was interested and contemplating what kind of carrier to get...she wanted to know if it was worth springing for the pricier carriers (like Ergo) versus buying the cheaper ones like Baby Bjorn/Snuggli.

 

So, probably the best thing you can do is be a good ambassador--wear the heck out of whatever carrier you have that works for you, and comment on how easy/effortless it is, and don't be surprised if your friend doesn't start asking you where she can get one... 

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#16 of 18 Old 03-17-2014, 08:58 PM
 
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Great advice, sageowl!  I find that a lot of people find it an entertaining novelty to see one of my kids in the Ergo, especially when on my back.  Often they are both amused (at the cuteness? idk!) and willing to talk, as well.  Its a great conversation starter!

 

My old Ergo actually came with a stack of business cards, meant to be handed out to anyone I might come across who was interested!  Wish I had more.

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#17 of 18 Old 03-18-2014, 12:32 PM
 
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Eight years ago, my best friend and I were pregnant together.

 

She used a Didymos wrap, I used a Björn. She wore baby until she was 2, I only used the thing a few times and then sold it. Baby hated it it, my back ached.

 

She breastfed on demand and one-sided.

 

I switched breasts at set time and fed on schedule, used formula quickly as I thought I have low supply. Now I know I had oversupply and baby was only getting foremilk.

 

My friend never criticised me, she had this "every mum knows best" attitude...

 

Now, having my second one, I do what she does and sometimes wish she had said something to me :(

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#18 of 18 Old 03-18-2014, 03:20 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EineMutti View Post
 

Eight years ago, my best friend and I were pregnant together.

 

She used a Didymos wrap, I used a Björn. She wore baby until she was 2, I only used the thing a few times and then sold it. Baby hated it it, my back ached.

 

She breastfed on demand and one-sided.

 

I switched breasts at set time and fed on schedule, used formula quickly as I thought I have low supply. Now I know I had oversupply and baby was only getting foremilk.

 

My friend never criticised me, she had this "every mum knows best" attitude...

 

Now, having my second one, I do what she does and sometimes wish she had said something to me :(

She led very well by example, as you saw an alternative to caring for your children. While you wish now she would have said something, you may not have been as receptive as you are now and she wanted to maintain a good friendship with you, regardless of your different styles of parenting.


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