Have you ever offered advice to a stranger on slinging? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 43 Old 04-29-2004, 05:24 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm just wondering. I've often seen moms slinging their babes with the rings way too low or else with the rings on their back or some other uncomfortable looking combination. I have the impulse to go up to them and first off congratulate them for slinging their babe and then suggesting that they might want to move the rings etc into a more comfortable position. But I hold back since I'm not sure how it would be taken YK? Have y'all ever done this and what was the response from the mama?
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#2 of 43 Old 04-29-2004, 05:32 PM
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naking

i am a brand new sling wearing mom and i know i would LOVE if someone offered me help while out! in fact i paid an lc to help me when dd was 2 mos old and it took until today for me to feel good about it. if someone had offered help in a "real" life situation it probabl would have "stuck" better.

go for it!
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#3 of 43 Old 04-29-2004, 05:44 PM
 
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Oh, yeah. I do it all the time. But, it is usually wearers of Baby Bjorns who have it all wrong. I see them hunched forward, looking like they're in pain and it just HURTS!

So I butt in.

Haven't had any negative responses.
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#4 of 43 Old 04-29-2004, 06:04 PM
 
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Sure! I think most moms will be happy for the help. And you can always offer them a chance to act like they know what they're doing and just like it that way, then really they will take your advice when you're not looking,lol.
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#5 of 43 Old 04-29-2004, 06:16 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tupelo Honey
Sure! I think most moms will be happy for the help. And you can always offer them a chance to act like they know what they're doing and just like it that way, then really they will take your advice when you're not looking,lol.
LOL, I like that approach. If I saw RL slingers i would defiantely offer help, heck I'd be so thrilled to see another RL sligner I'd probabyl maul them and annoy the heck out of them. :-)

Mom to Joscelyne 14, Andrew 12, and Mackenzie 10 and wife to Nate.
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#6 of 43 Old 04-29-2004, 06:33 PM
 
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Lol. One day Alison (mom2twinslus1) was in the grocery store in line by a mom with a sling up on her neck. So she goes "So, do you find that you like it like that, at your neck? I tend to like it more spread over my shoulder like this." SO the woman says "Oh, yeah, I love my sling, it's so comfy...blah blah blah." So as Alison was leaving she saw the woman pulling it down from her neck and looking relieved.

People come in here all the time with their slings jacked up all crazy. Given where we are, I feel comfortable saying "can I just show you a quick thing about your sling?" And they're always so glad and much more comfortable once we've adjusted.
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#7 of 43 Old 04-29-2004, 10:55 PM
 
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I saw a lady at the mall wearing her NN waaay too low and I felt weird approaching her so I didn't say anything. I am a wimp.

However, when DD was a younger baby (I can't say 'tiny' as she was only tiny for the first month of her life), I wore my MW with the rings on my back intentionally because I had the hardest time getting her in it without her head getting bonked on the rings. I didn't know about pouches then. So myabe I would have appreciated the help, but I am not sure...
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#8 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 12:51 AM
 
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SolsticeMama, can you come to Oregon and teach me to use a ring sling properly? I'd LOVE it if someone helped me. I can't even use the darned thing in public, and try only occasionally at home, its so awkward. I have one made by Rev Jan, so its a nice design, but DS's head always bonks the rings, or he's too squished, etc. I can work a pouch and a Moby just fine, though, luckily!
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#9 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 12:53 AM
 
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Funny story:

for "almost" strangers: my mom's cousin's daughter (my 2nd cousin) who I barely knew was at our family reunion last year. She had a little baby and was there with a sling and looked a bit uncomfortable. My mom's cousin comes over to me and says, you've got to know about these sling things, right? And so I was able to totally help her out. It was interesting, though ... I was almost 7 mos. pregnant, and so I wasn't able to really show on me, which is easier for me. Also, her sling had these huge rails, and I'm just not a rails kind of person. Plus, I never succeeded at slinging dd until she was past 6 mos., so actually I hadn't ever done a tiny baby. So I had to make adjustments here and there. It might have been a NoJo or an OTSBH. I can't make those work right to save my life. I've designed my own sling with no rails and a low-profile pleated shoulder. Works great!
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#10 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 12:56 AM
 
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You see other people wearing slings??
I feel like I should be at the fair and people pay to see the amazing woman who wears her baby.
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#11 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 01:01 AM
 
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sure, I have helped when needed (usually at LLL meetings when I used to go) but more often than not, I have seen a mom who needs a sling, period. I have been known to whip an extra out and give a sling and a quick lesson to a few moms struggling coming off the bus or dragging a tired, screaming toddler down the street....I just hoped they figured it out and kept using it!

(I bet I seem like one of those people who hand out bibles and pamphlets everywhere I go...but I dont really FORCE it on them, and they really COULD use one...if they just tried.....oh jeez, I AM one of those people.... )
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#12 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 02:44 AM
 
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i do it all the time and then there's a mamma i know who's perfectly fine with her newbornboy standing real low. the main thing i like to do is fan out the back. as for the people with the snuglis, i have given up hope for them. and no, i don't see millions of slings but when i do i sure do pay attention.
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#13 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 02:59 AM
 
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I did help a stranger with her Maya in an ice cream parlor one time...she was trying to get her baby situated and she saw me slinging my babe and we kind of met eyes and I asked her if she wanted a hand. She was very grateful. I get so excited when I see other slingin mamas I can hardly contain myself!
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#14 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 01:55 PM
 
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I think if you start with the "hey, isn't babywearing great?" approach, it can easily lead into offering helpful tips. So I wouldn't run up to someone and just start to try and fix them, but I would totally do what Alison did at the grocery store. And any time I see a parent with a sling I make eye contact at a minimum, and if they smile at me I pounce!

Melanie
Magical Mama, joyfully home educating my three wonders: FR (12/02), EG (05/05), DK (06/09)
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#15 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 01:57 PM
 
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I never see slingin' mamas, so I can't help, but I would be ecstatic if a slingin' mama saw me and offered to help!

~Brandon Michael (11/23/03), Jocelyn Lily Nữ (2/4/07, adopted 5/28/07 from Vietnam), Amelia Rylie (1/14/09), & Ryland Josef William (9/7/05-9/7/05 @ 41 wks). 
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#16 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 07:37 PM
 
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The reason that I'm still wearing my babies is that some woman in the mall offered to show me how to adjust my sling when ds #1 was a baby. I had an OTSBH and he was way down low near my waist and it was just awkward. She tightened it up for me and it was great from then on. I ended up later moving on to a Maya Wrap, which I love. But if it weren't for her, I might have given up.

Midwife (CPM, LDM) and homeschooling mama to:
13yo ds   10yo dd  8yo ds and 6yo ds and 1yo ds  
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#17 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 07:41 PM
 
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I am all about bossing around other mamas, even strangers.
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#18 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 08:03 PM
 
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Quote:
You see other people wearing slings??
I feel like I should be at the fair and people pay to see the amazing woman who wears her baby.
Ditto, but I am starting to have people ask me about mine.

I had an ad in Wed's paper for a babywearing class I'm having tomorrow. A lady phoned me last night excited because she said she didn't know there were people who could show someone else how to use them. She has a sling but can't figure it out(due anyday with #5).

Contact a breastfeeding group near you, the leader may know someone who could help.
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#19 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 10:02 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by annelizabeth
You see other people wearing slings??
I feel like I should be at the fair and people pay to see the amazing woman who wears her baby.

DITTO! People are always commenting on my 'interesting' or 'new' contraption!
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#20 of 43 Old 04-30-2004, 11:40 PM
 
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I often have the urge to go up and offer unsolicited advice, but I can't usually work up the nerve. I tried to start a conversation with a woman wearing her baby in a Bjorn down by her hips, but she wasn't interested.
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#21 of 43 Old 05-01-2004, 06:29 PM
 
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okay, nak

Was at the grocery store this am and this lady came up to me and goes where did I get that; her daughter wants one, only saw nojo and wants no padding. So I told about Mayawrap, have to get online. Random people ask me about them. I made mine.
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#22 of 43 Old 05-02-2004, 02:23 AM
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I was in a baby store, and the saleswoman was pushing this awkward looking sling onto a poor bewildered new mother. I jumped right in and pulled out my ring sling and gave a great demonstration with my little dude. He even modeled some of the other slings and carriers they had there. Afte the saleswoman moved away I gave the mama some web addys for some great slings - like Kangaroo Korner, and hotslings and peppermint.com I hope she checks them out
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#23 of 43 Old 05-02-2004, 10:21 AM
 
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I don't think I've ever seen another slingin mama, at least not after ds was born, but if I did I'd probably be mauling them begging for help, lol. He's almost 5 months old and I'm still awkward with them so don't use it out much. I would LOVE it if someone offered help! In your shoes I'd definitely try offering tips.
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#24 of 43 Old 05-02-2004, 05:53 PM
 
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i'm open to talking about using the sling via email and hopefully can help anyone who wants it. i'm at seenah@cox.net. that way we can talk about specifics like what kind of sling you have and what you want out of it. feel free to write me.

casina
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#25 of 43 Old 05-02-2004, 08:07 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Messy Nessie
naking

i am a brand new sling wearing mom and i know i would LOVE if someone offered me help while out!

Oh--me, too. If someone were to help me, I'd not only thank her, I'd probably take her out to lunch!

Someone . . . . help . . . . me . . . .

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#26 of 43 Old 05-02-2004, 11:30 PM
 
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I saw a lady at Super Target today wearing a Nojo. She was about 5'2" and petite. The sling was so bulky and ugggly (IMHO). The back was all twisted up. It took every amount of strength in my soul not to go up to her. I am just shy. And I never like the idea of someone thinking that I am just trying to sell them something.

On the other hand, it sure was shocking seeing someone slingin' a babe here in Dallas!!
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#27 of 43 Old 05-08-2004, 12:22 PM
 
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[QUOTE=kris1225]I saw a lady at Super Target today wearing a Nojo. She was about 5'2" and petite. The sling was so bulky and ugggly (IMHO). The back was all twisted up. It took every amount of strength in my soul not to go up to her. I am just shy. QUOTE]

If someone walked up to me and adjusted my pouch or sling saying "here, I think this will be more comfortable for you." I'd HUG them!!!

Bean : Mama to DSs and (& :, 4 goats & 7 ) and two fraternal twin BOYS 9-19-09 (+ 1 daytime boy)
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#28 of 43 Old 05-08-2004, 02:26 PM
 
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hey, i've got no emails. maybe the spam filter is working too hard. anyone want to venture what they need help on?
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#29 of 43 Old 05-08-2004, 03:39 PM
 
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I emailed ya!
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#30 of 43 Old 05-08-2004, 03:54 PM
 
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Everybody here knows you can go to your local LLL mtg any old time and get great hands on help, right?

My SIL, on her 4th child, but still learning (from me, hehe!) bought a sling finally. At a fam reunion her ds was only a couple weeks old. I saw her dh carrying him across the yard hanging and swinging below the waist. It was a travesty. Later, I got a hold of the boy and the sling and held him kangaroo style tummy to tummy and he took a 2 1/2 hr nap on my chest. The best sleep he'd had in his life. My SIL kept checking him, thinking something was wrong. Nope, something was right.

~~epilogue, she nursed him for over 4 yrs. The longest she'd nursed before was 15 mos.
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