WHY don't more people babywear? There is really no "weird" stigma attached... - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 45 Old 09-17-2006, 09:03 PM
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For me, when pg with DS, it was the same reason we went with sposies. All we knew was what Parents magazine told us and what was at BRU. The magazines made fun of AP, so I was turned off by that and didn't pursue any of the traditional AP issues (of course we BF and co-slept, etc. but still didn't realize we were AP until DS was about a year old, lol!). We went to BRU and tried on a sling but hated it; DH thinks "baby bjorn" is a stupid name so we registered for a Snugli. But after using it a few times I realized I hated that, too, so the baby bucket it was!

I confess I still love my stroller. I hate carrying a diaper bag and LOVE that big basket underneath for holding stuff. But this time around I'm collecting all kinds of carriers and looking forward to using them!
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#32 of 45 Old 09-17-2006, 10:37 PM
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I agree with the other posters who said it is for a lack of information on all the great-looking slings,etc. that are out there!

I have tried to wear my babies but I only had a crummy one from Target or one of those gigantic ones from an "Other Mothers" type store. They never fit right and were sooo uncomfortable-for baby AND me! I am short so I suppose that is part of the problem, too.

With my last baby I tried a Maya Wrap, but again, I just couldn't get it to fit comfortably so I only used it a few times.

I plan on trying a Moby Wrap with our baby due in October. My husband saw a woman with one on and thought it was the neatest thing - go figure?! He even went up and asked her all about it! I was soo surprised, usually he doesn't notice stuff like that!

Sooo, I hope a Moby will work for me as I really need to have my hands free and yet want baby to be happy!
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#33 of 45 Old 09-17-2006, 10:49 PM
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I have a pouch but I don't use it all that often. I don't know if it is just a wrong fit or what but it's not really that comfortable for me. I ended up just carrying my son a lot--now with my daughter too. I hardly ever use a stroller with her--I just carry her.

I don't have the $$ to be buying a bunch of different slings to try. Many of them are really expensive even used. And I don't know how to make one myself. And we live in the middle of nowhere with no babywearing groups around here.
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#34 of 45 Old 09-17-2006, 11:05 PM
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Okay seriously, I DO babywear often but I always bring a stroller too. Why? Because I get freaking tired! Because my back starts to hurt! Because my baby is squirmy and hot and pulls my hair! With a stroller I have a basket to set my purse and my diaper bag. If I sling him, I have to carry it all. My 9 month old weighs over 22 lbs and was 10 lbs. at birth. I'm 17 weeks pregnant. It's a lot of stress on my body already. Carrying the baby for an hour while grocery shopping or through the farmer's market KILLS me and I have really bad sciatica pain for days afterwards.
Seriously, I love the idea in theory but in practice it gets really physically exhausting. I have a Hotsling and a Sling Set.
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#35 of 45 Old 09-17-2006, 11:24 PM
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I don't know. Baby wearing seems pretty popular around here, all different kinds. (Men and women too.) I have never noticed a sigma about it. The trend continues to grow more and more as baby wearing tools improve and get more easy to find or make.

My 1st DD wouldn't take to a sling or carrier much. I tried she just didn't like it. Hold me or put me down.

My 2nd loved the Bjorn, but I was never able to find a sling that worked for us. I wish I would of tried more and harder at it. If I ever have a 3rd child I am getting a sling. I even know what kind I am going to try 1st this time (but not give up if we can't make it work.) My 2 year old still likes to be held or carried (thank God she is small.)

Then again I always liked strollers too, great places to put your bags and other things to carry instead of the baby too. Also I used to stroll the older child and use a carrier for the baby.

I know in the winter here with young babies I like to use the car seat to take the baby in public places. I could keep her bundled up in the car seat and carrier don't work well over coats (slings too I would imagine.) I just makes things easier getting out of the car and into the building.

I don't see why it has to be stroller or baby wearing. We always did a little bit of both when appropriate.
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#36 of 45 Old 09-17-2006, 11:24 PM
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I have to agree with the posters who said it's because mai tais, slings, ect . . . are just not available at the "tradition" baby stores and most "mainstream" mamas and mamas to be only go to those big stores. I know that whenever I go out with dd in my mei tai Or my Ergo (which I think is becoming more mainstream) people ask me where they could get one. I think alot of people are intimidated with having to buy something online. I think Mei Tais are so beautiful that if they carried a varitety of different prints and patterns at baby's r us women would just eat them up. There has to be more publicity about babywearing too other then just baby bjorns and snugglis. I see lot of people wearing those. I had one too in the begining and thank goodness I discovered the ergo and mai tai or I don't think I'd be babywearing anymore.
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#37 of 45 Old 09-18-2006, 01:00 AM
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You're right. There does need to be more advertising. www.NineInNineOut.org is in the process of really breaking out of it's shell. There is lots planned and so many groups being formed across the US, Canada and in Europe.

Babywearing, IMO, will always start with a grassroots campaign. As NINO gets bigger and is able to help fund smaller groups in their advertising efforts, word will be spread, demand for these other-than-Bjorn-type-carriers will be high and those other shops will start carrying Mei Tais, etc.

Already several stores here carry Ergos in stock and Zolos, too.

It still makes me sad when I hear of mamas who quit babywearing because whatever they have "doesn't work." Sometimes it's as easy as making an adjustment in the way it's worn. Other times, it takes trying out several carriers. Sometimes success depends on a baby's age, too.

Of coures, I have nothing against strollers at all. They are a huge help in lugging around shopping bags and a 4-year-old who's tired of walking. Seriously, strollers and buckets are terrific to have. And I enjoy babywearing tremendously.
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#38 of 45 Old 09-18-2006, 01:08 AM
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I love my mei tais and I also like my stroller.

It's nice to take my stroller when I'm going somewhere where we will be moving all day and I want both me and dd to be comfortable. She likes to nap laying flat and our stroller accomodates that. It also keeps me a lot more comfortable to have a break from her sweaty body and weight while she naps. The carrier is always in the stroller, so if she wants to we use it.

I love wearing her at the grocery store, markets, and festivals. It's way more convenient to maneuver in crowds without a stroller and for short trips, the mei tai is so nice.

Even if just the Ergo (which I hated) was sold in BRU, it would help more mainstream parents choose a healthy alternative to the stroller/bjorn/snugli.
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#39 of 45 Old 09-18-2006, 01:18 AM
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Originally Posted by CelticFish
I think the biggest issue, at least in my area, is that there's only two places I can think of that even sell slings locally, so there's just not a lot of support.
That's the case in my area, too. People have asked me before if I don't have a carrier (referring to something like a cheap Infantino front pack...which I have LOL) or "need" one WHILE I'm wearing DD in a wrap or a MT. They all figured I was just trying to make-do with some fabric. : : Granted, my wrap was just a no-sew sling, but does the average person really think about all those fancy wraps if they were just "making do"?? KWIM? And I was kind of offended.

That said, before I got pregnant, I didn't really even realize there were so many options for babywearing out there. I knew about a Maya Wrap, only because I had seen a friend who'd made one for her DS, but even then, that was the first time I'd ever even seen a sling.

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#40 of 45 Old 09-18-2006, 03:05 AM
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Yep, it's lack of information. Before I started researching homebirth and therefore AP, I had seen a grand total of one sling. I'd never seen a wrap. Never saw a mei-tai.

When I started researching AP, it seemed like everything was Maya Wrap and other rign slings.

I cannot wear a one-shouldered carry for more than a couple of minutes because of a shoulder injury. I cannot wear narrow shoulder straps either.

I'm amassing quite the BW collection trying to find things that work well, and many do, but nothing works all the time. I've spent more than I should, and will end up being short of cash by the end of the term (it's always fun when you get paid three times a year...), but I'm in pain less and babywearing more.

Basically I need a wrap, and a supportive one, or a wide-strapped asian baby carrier. I'm a sewing and fabric geek and so i've gotten really into it, but if one doesn't care about fabrics and things it's gotta be hard to keep looking until the right thing pops up.
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#41 of 45 Old 09-18-2006, 03:45 AM
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So many parents just don't know about it.
I always feel kinda bad when I see a mom struggling to work with a bucket or a bulky stroller.
One of the latest Hathor comics was about just getting a length of cheap fabric and tying it into a makeshift sling for women in need, I really like the idea!

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#42 of 45 Old 09-18-2006, 04:21 AM
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A more mainstream friend of mine bought the Baby Bjorn and found it very uncomfortable. So she thinks she doesn't like baby-wearing and that her son is just too heavy to carry. (He's chubby, but under a year. And still under 20lbs) I mentioned that a Bjorn wasn't the type of carrier that I wanted to use and that with certain carriers people comfortably carried toddlers around. But I wasn't prepared to push too hard and she didn't seem interested at all.
I would guess a lot of parents only know about the Bjorn or try that first and don't like it, and then get turned off to the whole thing.
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#43 of 45 Old 09-18-2006, 09:10 PM
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Originally Posted by lilylove View Post
I agree that, here, it is partly because people just don't know that there is that option. I can't count how many times I've been stopped and asked "What is that ? Did I make it? Where did I buy it? "

I do think that part of the problem, though, is that belief that we need to push our babies away in order to teach them some bizarre concept of independence.

I have a DS who is 8 and only saw baby carriers that are commercial and don't work very well - my back hurt. Fast forward...my good friend had a baby 2 years ago and is a natural mama does AP - and I kept asking her if her back hurt and she kept saying no. I thought...oh, I'll do that next time. My sister then had her 3rd baby and started slinging too and I knew it must work well because she has back problems but can easily sling her little one. My sister hates strollers - always has but we just didn't know about slinging and our mom BFed us and is very much into natural eating and stuff. But, we're from NW Indiana too. My DS and I lived in Guatemala and Ecuador this past year and everybody slings - except the hoity toity upperclass women. The indigenous and countryside people still do though. I'm now PG and WISH I had stocked up on cloth while I was in Guatemala.

Anyway, I guess it is ignorance and lack of access to babywear.

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#44 of 45 Old 09-19-2006, 04:43 AM
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Well, I think just letting people see you wearing your baby is a great way to spread the word. I didn't know about slings or APing until I saw a lady at church with a really trendy black ring sling that matched her dress. Then I looked online and found out a whole bunch of information. That's also how I stumbled across MDC, which is the first place I heard about APing, CDing, med-free births, delaying vacinations, not circumcizing, and co-sleeping. I never even would have thought of any of those things, but once I was exposed to those concepts, I realized I wasn't mainstream at all and that most of my philosophies were consistent with APing. All because of one lady at church and I had never even met her before!

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#45 of 45 Old 09-19-2006, 07:42 PM
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Originally Posted by momeeboys View Post

Pouches require a perfect fit to be comfortable. Many places have excellent return/exchange policies simply because of the nature of the pouch.
That's why I got an adjustable one...now both me and my husband can carry the baby tummy to tummy
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