babywearing mama sad about buying stroller - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 13 Old 04-23-2007, 11:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
batsoup's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: East of Philly, West of the ocean
Posts: 453
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
help me assuage the guilt! just bought a secondhand stroller today, and rolled Ds (9 months yesterday!) home. he fell asleep. he's never been in a stroller before, and i feel very sad : about getting one, and he felt so very far away down there. BUT - he's 21 lbs, and even with the (new) beloved Ergo, my back is dying. when we go for walks, they are long ones, usually minimum 1 hour (we live in the city currently). i'm not that big and strong (132lbs), and DH is out of shape and gets pains from carrying him that long too. We often switch off halfway, which does help, but i know there will be more and more times when we want some relief. But ack, i hate that my body isn't more like a machine in this! I've been carrying DS in a pouch at home more (rarely wore him at home once he was happy sitting up on his own), and i know we'll keep wearing out for shorter walks. but help me feel better!!:
batsoup is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
#2 of 13 Old 04-23-2007, 11:20 PM
 
jennnk's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: The Emerald City
Posts: 1,080
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
we do the best we can with what we have, where we are. I'm 100 pounds, my son is 25. I haven't been able to carry him in much of anything for more than 20 mins. at a time since he was 12 weeks old. He LOVES the stroller, will fall asleep & stay asleep in it for nearly 2 hours, and he gets to see dogs and other babies at just the right level for eye-contact interaction. I felt really guilty, at first, when I had to stop wearing him. People said things like "with the such & such carrier, I can carry my 40 pound 3 year old!" And I'd think "great for you, you obviously don't have back issues!" Because believe me, I'd carry him if I could, but I can't so I don't. I have a self-made moby now, and that buys me 20 minutes (I use it when we have to take the bus somewhere b/c you have to fold strollers on the bus, oy what a pain), but seriously when this wiggling creature is 25% of your weight & 50% of your height (yeah, did I mention I'm 5' tall & he's 30" tall?), it's just not realistic to think you can carry him all the time. And some kids can walk with you just fine, but not mine, not for any reasonable distance - he's too interested in everything & too independent to want to hold my hand for very long.
jennnk is offline  
#3 of 13 Old 04-23-2007, 11:40 PM
ber
 
ber's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: US
Posts: 852
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
the nice thing about strollers is that when you've got a kiddo on your back, the stroller can be used to carry other things like bags.

I know how you feel though - I felt the same way when we finally started using the stroller for occasional activities: he seemed so far away. And honestly, the stroller can be a real pain in the butt, but it does have some good uses too. I think it's great that you got one second hand


M, mom to DS1 (8 yrs), DS2 (5 yrs), and DS3 (2 yrs).

ber is offline  
#4 of 13 Old 04-24-2007, 03:03 AM
 
Quirky's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Princeton, NJ
Posts: 11,770
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Don't feel guilty! I have a babycarrier collection whose size I will not reveal, but I also (heart) my two strollers. When you've got more than one kid, you gotta have a stroller if you're going to go for long walks, travel, etc. And it's the best stuff-holder ever. Before we moved, I'd go to babywearing meetings at the library, and use the stroller to carry all my babycarriers into the library while wearing dd.

It's just another tool. As long as you use it appropriately and don't leave your child stashed in there at the park (as I have seen some people do ) then there's simply nothing wrong with it.

Come visit the NEW QuirkyBaby website -- earn QB Bucks rewards points for purchases, reviews, referrals, and more! Free US shipping on great brands of baby slings and carriers and FREE BabyLegs or babywearing mirror on orders of $100+. Take the QB Quiz for personalized advice!

Quirky is offline  
#5 of 13 Old 04-24-2007, 03:51 AM
 
Neth Naneth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: The Shire
Posts: 2,186
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Oh mama I so know how you feel. I am moving into a city, my son was 10 months on Friday, and I know I will be taking walks with him and know that I have to get a stroller.



Don't feel guilty.
Neth Naneth is offline  
#6 of 13 Old 04-24-2007, 02:13 PM
 
beachbaby's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: sea level
Posts: 1,668
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I hear ya! We have 2 second-hand strollers and DD never rode in one til she was 11 months. I put off using it for months. When I finally did put her in one, she just barely tolerated it, so we hardly used it.

Well, now that the weather has warmed up, we broke out the jogger again and DD at 17 months is in love with it! She climbs in, saying "up, up!" whenever she sees it and even wanted me to just push her around the yard. Figures, the die-hard babywearer now has a stroller-obsessed toddler!
beachbaby is offline  
#7 of 13 Old 04-24-2007, 02:15 PM
 
captain optimism's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Good Ship Lollipop
Posts: 6,852
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 19 Post(s)
That's okay, you can use both. They work well together.

Divorced mom of one awesome boy born 2-3-2003.
captain optimism is online now  
#8 of 13 Old 04-24-2007, 03:59 PM
 
bdavis337's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Sleep Deprivation, USA
Posts: 5,976
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
It's ok! My toddler LOVES the stroller, and he's too heavy to carry, especially when he's wiggling and squirming to "see, lookit Mummy....". He hasn't the desire for me to carry him, so the stroller is what works best for us. When he was tiny, I had a Bjorn, as he had terrible reflux and needed to be upright. When he outgrew that, I never mastered the sling so he "graduated" to the stroller.

It's ok!
bdavis337 is offline  
#9 of 13 Old 04-24-2007, 04:21 PM
 
EdnaMarie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 5,937
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Well for heaven's sakes. There is NOTHING wrong with using a stroller. I have been using my wrap since DD was a week old and almost always wear her, but I have a stroller that converts into a carseat and when I travel I sometimes put DD in it. She likes it. It's obvious that she gets plenty of contact because she almost never opposes being put in it. I also sometimes have to put her in it as a restraint when I'm in the kitchen since I can't have her hovering over the rice with me, you know? But I don't feel guilty, and you shouldn't either.

It's not that the stay-at-home-parent gets to stay home with the kids. The kids get to stay home with a parent. Lucky Mom to DD1 (4 y) and DD2 (18 mo), Wife to Mercenary Dad
EdnaMarie is offline  
#10 of 13 Old 04-24-2007, 06:39 PM
 
rzberrymom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 2,702
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I know what you mean OP! I felt a tremendous distance from my DD when I started using a stroller. I think it's hormonal and that when you're used to babywearing, the body really craves it! I try to bring a ringsling with me (or a pouch would work) and switch off with the stroller and with wearing her in the sling. It seems to be good for me and for DD.
rzberrymom is offline  
#11 of 13 Old 04-25-2007, 11:48 AM
 
taradt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: victoria, BC
Posts: 2,450
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I wish my DS would be happy and sleep in a stroller.
Once a week we walk to the park (A strenous 45 minute hilly walk each way). DD will get into the double stroller but DS will only last for 15 minutes before he screams.

Like everything it is a tool that can be useful, much better to have a baby in the stroller then in the house all day
taradt is offline  
#12 of 13 Old 04-25-2007, 06:13 PM
 
New Mexico Beach's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 703
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I am a total babywearing advocate and even owned my own sling business for 5 years, yet I own a stroller guilt free.

Sure, babywearing is awesome, but who's to say that is what your baby wants/needs every single time you go somewhere? Sounds like he was perfectly content in the stroller. If he's enjoying it, why feel guilty?
New Mexico Beach is offline  
#13 of 13 Old 04-25-2007, 06:28 PM
 
joyfulmomof1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 40
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by New Mexico Beach View Post
I am a total babywearing advocate and even owned my own sling business for 5 years, yet I own a stroller guilt free.

Sure, babywearing is awesome, but who's to say that is what your baby wants/needs every single time you go somewhere? Sounds like he was perfectly content in the stroller. If he's enjoying it, why feel guilty?
Ditto!
joyfulmomof1 is offline  
Reply

User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off