I was harassed for nursing at local diner, city police backed it up. - Page 5 - Mothering Forums
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#121 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 03:49 AM
 
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Kudos, thismama! You came across as so reasonable and level-headed in the news story, which is the absolute best thing in terms of representing us as nursing moms. Way to go!!

This is a perfect example of how contacting the right people and not being reactionary is the best course of action in the face of discrimination. In furthering the lactivist cause, let's all remember that a nurse-in is never the first step, even though it would feel really good to stick it to whomever is discriminating against nursing moms by protesting. We want to present ourselves as calm, cool, collected, organized and informed.

Perhaps once this whole thing has resolved (with hopefully a very positive result), we can get this thread to be stickied as an example of how to go about dealing with the authorities and the media?

and please keep us posted as things unfold.
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#122 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 04:17 AM
 
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That was great! You rock, and you have cute kids!
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#123 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 05:46 AM
 
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So I guess I'm complaining to Human Rights in the morn. Anyone BTDT? I will phone them and see how to start the process.

I am also calling the supervisor of the rude cop I dealt with.

And I'm calling the health unit coz apparently they will pay visits to businesses with bf literature upon request. Hope that's true.
Great news clip! I'm just wondering, given the steps you took, how the story managed to get to the media. Did you contact them?

Roman Goddess, mom to J (August 2004) and J (April 2009).    h20homebirth.gif signcirc1.gif
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#124 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 10:06 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Great news clip! I'm just wondering, given the steps you took, how the story managed to get to the media. Did you contact them?
No I didn't but I posted the situation on my local board when I got home, just as I did here and would with anything, I was upset, yk? And my mamas started organizing and emailed just about everyone they could think to.

Kidspiration - It's hard when this stuff happens, at least it was for me, because it's like you don't know what to do, yk? Kinda feels like a big murky sea of omg. Like, I was just eating lunch! Really came out of nowhere, and similar things have happened to me before and I was way too passive. It's hard to know what to actually do that will get a proactive result but that will actually make people notice. A nurse in was the first thing we thought of, we really didn't know what else to do. And of course you can never control what the media is going to do, like for me I almost refused to be interviewed but then I didn't want to be so scared about bad spin that I turned down the chance to get the story out.

I am feeling pretty good about it now but honestly I found the whole thing so overwhelming and difficult to navigate.
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#125 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 10:35 AM
 
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You know, as overwhelming as it may be/have been, you simply AMAZED me with how well you handled yourself.
I didn't comment before, but your situtation absolutely enraged me beyond me words.. and you came through it with grace. That just completely blows my mind. I think it's safe to assume that most of us wouldn't have handled it so smoothly.

Thank you. Seriously.. thank you for standing up for yourself and others.

Wife and mother to 2 kiddos - 17 yr old DS jammin.gifand 13 yr old DD energy.gif.. and a cat that thinks he's a dog dizzy.gif
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#126 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 10:49 AM
 
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Perfect and wonderful
I'm so glad you were able to be a cause for some change.
My hero

waiting on the power of the three wolf moon. 
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#127 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 11:05 AM
 
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Yay! You go Mama!!!!!:
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#128 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 11:13 AM
 
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I subbed to this thread to see what happened. This is better than I could have ever imagined. I loved how the media represented it as just another mistake by a local diner. It seemed like the media thought, of course breastfeeding in public is normal and protected. And we all know what a big influence the media has on society!

Way to go, mama! I, for one, am very glad this happened to you because you took exactly the steps you needed to effect a perfect resolution! Everyone is better off because of it.
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#129 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 11:14 AM
 
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thank you for standing up for breastfeeding moms!
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#130 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 11:27 AM
 
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Thismamma, you did such a great job.

Congratulations! You really turned a negative situation into something very positive.

I thought the way it was reported too, was awesome. So many times media tries to be "balanced" and present both sides. Of course, there is no good side to discrimination.
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#131 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 12:06 PM
 
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Woot! The upload of the 11pm news is up and it now mentions the OHRC rules. A lot shorter in length but better worded WRT to our rights!!!

I'm gonna post the link but TM just message me when you want the link removed and I will oblige. As TH asked with her other link, please don't quote the link as she will want it removed later.

I'm just too excited and could wait to share it all with you!

Here's the link to the news story ---> 11pm news

Oh and I've been pleasantly impressed that on the local board TM mentions, there has been only 1 troll that signed up to be offensive. Not bad on a board with nearly 2000 registered members IMO He/she got put in place fast, ignored overall, banned and then deleted in just a couple short hours!

LP
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#132 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 12:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks LP!

And yeah, I was amazed by how consistently supportive of the issue everyone was on our board. I thought there would be some kind of debate, some blaming of me, etc etc. Totally not. How cool is that?
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#133 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 03:18 PM
 
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You rock, Thismama. And your kids are gorgeous.

Christine , wife of Ron , mama to Tony (4-25-03) and Maria (3-19-06) :
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#134 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 03:27 PM
 
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yay!! you are so awesome!!! you were so poised and well spoken!!! awesome job!! you and your babies are beautiful!!!

that restaurant stinks though!! they already knew the policy and harassed you anyway!!! : and the police backed them up... i know they corrected that mistake but i hope the restaurant doesn't keep doing this thinking the police will back them up again or something!!!
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#135 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 05:04 PM
 
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As an FYI this is what just came of the BC case:
"Tribunal member Barbara Humphreys found that H&M’s apology and a reaffirmation of its breastfeeding policy to all employees was the appropriate response and “it would not further the purposes of the [Human Rights] Code to proceed with the complaint.”

http://www.vancouversun.com/Human+Ri...990/story.html
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#136 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 05:17 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Frootloop View Post
You know, as overwhelming as it may be/have been, you simply AMAZED me with how well you handled yourself.
I didn't comment before, but your situtation absolutely enraged me beyond me words.. and you came through it with grace. That just completely blows my mind. I think it's safe to assume that most of us wouldn't have handled it so smoothly.

Thank you. Seriously.. thank you for standing up for yourself and others.
What she said THANK YOU!!!!

ETA: and you and your kiddos are beautiful

Mama to Nell (11/15/06) and Maggie (10/9/10) . AFTER 2.5 YEARS, I AM AN AUNTIE!!! joy.gifHOORAY TEAR78 and welcome Anika and Brand New Baby Boy!!!!  Circumcision: the more you know, the worse it is; please leave the decision up to your son!

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#137 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 08:35 PM
 
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Can't listen to the video because I'm at work, but I watched it, and all I can say is wow mami, you and your babies are BEAUTIFUL.

Will listen tonight, I'm sure you were brilliant! Thank you for being out, proud, and so brave!!! :
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#138 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 08:51 PM
 
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Originally Posted by neverdoingitagain View Post
:
Perfect and wonderful
I'm so glad you were able to be a cause for some change.
My hero
:
Your children are beautiful!!
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#139 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 08:53 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by ceilydhmama View Post
As an FYI this is what just came of the BC case:
"Tribunal member Barbara Humphreys found that H&M’s apology and a reaffirmation of its breastfeeding policy to all employees was the appropriate response and “it would not further the purposes of the [Human Rights] Code to proceed with the complaint.”

http://www.vancouversun.com/Human+Ri...990/story.html
See, now that sucks. I have already BTDT, I was harassed about 3 years ago at the local Y, lifeguard came at me and my child with a towel. We called the muckity mucks who said they would retrain, we let it go. Well guess what, I was speaking with a friend this weekend who mentioned that she was harassed, at the Y, about 2 years ago. Just an apology and a promise to tell employees is obviously not enough. There does need to be some consequence for the incident happening in the first place IMO, as a deterrant and an acknowledgement that the fact that it happened at all is a problem. Otherwise individual women first have to endure the harassment and then fight for an apology, and there is no consequence to the harasser beyond that? And then someone else may get harassed again and unless the two women talk how will they know it is a repetitive problem? Please. That is not right.
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#140 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 09:06 PM
 
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I am so proud of you, you ROCK!

And look at that HUGE baby! Precious!

:

~Marie : Mom to DS(11), DS(10), DD(8), DD(4), DD(2), & Happily Married to DH 12 yrs.!
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#141 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 09:32 PM
 
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WTG Thismama!! You came across really well and did a great job representing the nursing mamas! Calm, informed, and strong. I'm proud of you!!

(Beautiful baby and little girl, BTW!

I am so sorry you had to deal with this, though. You were just feeding your baby!! It just kills me that this is STILL a big deal to people. Seriously

Mama to DS (8) and DD (7) Aristotle was not Belgian. The central message of Buddhism is not "Every man for himself." And the London Underground is not a political movement.

 

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#142 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 09:37 PM
 
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Just an apology and a promise to tell employees is obviously not enough.
I agree, thismamma. Imagine ANY other group being discriminated against. Pick one. An apology, sorry we infringed upon your rights as a human being and member of xxxxx group, would just not cut it.
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#143 of 157 Old 12-16-2008, 09:48 PM
 
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Okay so after all of this discussion I have decided not to do a nurse in at this time, and I am going to start instead with providing information to the restaurant and police and requesting an apology and a change of action. And I am going to contact the Human Rights Commission on Monday.

Thanks for all the help! I will let you know what transpires.
Good job, mama!
I'm a fellow Ontarian and work in the media. I think many newspapers would be interested in this as a story. PM me if you want ideas...

Megan, loving her sweet rainbow1284.gif boys, born Aug. 2008 and Feb. 2011, and their sister, born still March 2007 candle.gif
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#144 of 157 Old 12-17-2008, 01:37 PM
 
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You did awesome TM! Way to follow through!

And I agree. Thems some adorable kids yas got there!

It's lonely being the only XX in a house of XYs.
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#145 of 157 Old 12-17-2008, 06:32 PM
 
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Good job on TV!

susie
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#146 of 157 Old 12-19-2008, 01:51 AM
 
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I was on the news tonight.

WAY TO GO!!! (Love the purple longies! My fave color.)

 upsidedown.gif  Please see my Community Profile! energy.gif blogging.jpg about Asperger's Syndrome!

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#147 of 157 Old 12-19-2008, 02:01 AM
 
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:Mama to 2 :
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#148 of 157 Old 12-19-2008, 12:09 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks mamas!

Got the longies on Diaper Swappers.
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#149 of 157 Old 12-19-2008, 04:46 PM
 
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Please don't take the link down. This is a very good video and can help lactivists all over.

Kimberly
(Mama to West (11/07) Mabel Kelly 10/02/09)
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#150 of 157 Old 12-19-2008, 05:06 PM
 
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I'm so sorry that you had to endure all of this, but I'm so glad that you pursued this.
And that was an awesome news clip! You helped so many mothers by bringing that incident to light

~e, wife to my sweet T partners.gif, mama to my turtleman (8) , sunshine (6 vbac.gif), and monkey (2)
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