Breastfeeding Passion - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#61 of 70 Old 04-20-2012, 04:15 AM
 
Youngfrankenstein's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 2,273
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I am not trying to make you look stupid.  I was where you were in my thoughts years ago.  I doubt you'll get many people to argue that breastmilk is the thing all babies should have, but then it gets trickier after that.

 

I think what many of the lactivists here are trying to say is that calling formula junk food isn't helping more women breastfeed.  I can see that you're growing and learning from this thread but your comment to me was as if I were trying to throw something in your face that you said 3 years ago.  It wasn't; you said it not more than a day before.

 

You told me how horrible you thought it was that I'd give a friend's baby a bottle of formula.  You likened it to me drugging him.

 

I feel as passionate as you do about getting babies to nurse, I have just changed my thinking that even though one is best, that doesn't make the other the end of the world.

One_Girl likes this.

Mama to 4. winner.jpghomebirth.jpg
Youngfrankenstein is offline  
#62 of 70 Old 04-20-2012, 06:14 AM
 
purplerose's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 899
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

that's what i did also. and i enjoy feeding other babies! i enjoy my older children and husband feeding my daughter(though it was hard to watch at first, even though it was my own milk).

Quote:
Originally Posted by Youngfrankenstein View Post

 

I feel as passionate as you do about getting babies to nurse, I have just changed my thinking that even though one is best, that doesn't make the other the end of the world.

 

 


drowning in hormones with 4 daughters and an understanding, loving hubby. also some dogs. my life is crazy and we are always learning.

purplerose is offline  
#63 of 70 Old 04-20-2012, 06:21 AM
 
Imakcerka's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 4,065
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 6 Post(s)

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by purplerose View Post

that's what i did also. and i enjoy feeding other babies! i enjoy my older children and husband feeding my daughter(though it was hard to watch at first, even though it was my own milk).

 

 

 

It is nice to be able to do that.  My husband and brother would argue over who got to feed our 1st baby.  It was pretty funny.  They would even pick at each others ability to thaw my milk properly.  They both researched it and both felt they knew better than the other. 

 

And feeding other peoples kids formula never bothered me.  Babies thrive.  Babies have something to eat and fighting over formula or Breastmilk is kind of ridiculous.  Nobody should be shamed for their choices.  If I were to have another right now, I'm thinking that I would FF.  Dh would be responsible for all the care while I was at work and breastfeeding would add to my stress.  It also was the culprit for my PPD.  The stress was unreal!

Imakcerka is offline  
#64 of 70 Old 04-20-2012, 06:40 AM
 
purplerose's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 899
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

the guilt of not breastfeeding would stress me out! you are right what you said before about the kids being ok without having the absolute best but there are just things i can't let go! i hated breastfeeding with #3 but i kept it up bc i just couldn't let go. and she would NOT take a bottle but i wasn't willing to see how starved she'd get. i guess breastfeeding isn't the 100%heavenlyglorious thing in the world...hard to admit that! now i'll go whip myself with thorns and stuff.


drowning in hormones with 4 daughters and an understanding, loving hubby. also some dogs. my life is crazy and we are always learning.

purplerose is offline  
#65 of 70 Old 04-20-2012, 08:29 AM - Thread Starter
 
Margot Dawson's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 24
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I am sooo glad we had this discussion when we did.  One of my good friends, who I was particularly disappointed with for having FF, just told me in tears that her baby may have autism and is being screened for it soon.  I feel like if we hadn't had this discussion when we did, I would have had a mix of inappropriate feelings.  I'm in a place now where I don't feel like it was her fault at all, or mine. She loves her little guy so much and did the best for him that she could.  BF isn't a panacea, and life just throws you what it does sometimes despite our best efforts.  BF babies get autism too.  I bet there are lots of BF, no vax, etc. kids out there with autism and other issues.  I'm really glad I can be in a better emotional place to support her through this hard time.  

Margot Dawson is offline  
#66 of 70 Old 04-21-2012, 01:24 PM
 
eabbmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 207
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

This conversation is important to have. I met a mom last week that didn't have milk ducts and I really needed to be knocked off my high horse at that moment. Members of my family are unsupportive of my plans to nurse past two and I had been getting defensive. I looked at the mother sitting next to me ff her daughter and judged. I then found out what a grief stricken experience it had been for her. As people we must understand that judgement furthers no cause. I have also been experiencing judgement about other women's birth choices. A friend put it into perspective for me; she said that if a woman deems it necessary to have a c-section what right do we have to say what equals necessity for her. The world is not black and white. I think that if mothers were more supportive of each other and ALL of the difficult choices and situations we have to make or be in the world would be a kinder place. For my own personal issues I don't think I would have the massive guilt I did about my homebirth transfer or formula supplemtentation (it was even medically necessary) that I had. Why did I feel guilty about formula feeding when it was necessary? Why should I feel guilty if I want to formula feed and take a night off? I shouldn't feel guilty in either situation.

Margot Dawson likes this.
eabbmom is offline  
#67 of 70 Old 04-22-2012, 07:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
Margot Dawson's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 24
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Margot Dawson is offline  
#68 of 70 Old 04-29-2012, 01:31 PM
 
MichelleZB's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 995
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 19 Post(s)

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Margot Dawson View Post

I am sooo glad we had this discussion when we did.  One of my good friends, who I was particularly disappointed with for having FF, just told me in tears that her baby may have autism and is being screened for it soon.  I feel like if we hadn't had this discussion when we did, I would have had a mix of inappropriate feelings.  I'm in a place now where I don't feel like it was her fault at all, or mine. She loves her little guy so much and did the best for him that she could.  BF isn't a panacea, and life just throws you what it does sometimes despite our best efforts.  BF babies get autism too.  I bet there are lots of BF, no vax, etc. kids out there with autism and other issues.  I'm really glad I can be in a better emotional place to support her through this hard time.  

 

Yup. Although there are some greater health risks associated with formula feeding, autism isn't one of those risks. We don't know what causes autism, but it isn't milk powder mixed with sugar and vitamins (formula). So you can rest assured that your friend didn't "cause" the autism by bottle feeding.

MichelleZB is online now  
#69 of 70 Old 04-29-2012, 09:32 PM
 
rtjunker's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 187
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I think it's odd how defensive we can get of our choices either way. In all honesty becoming a mother has been a huge shock. All of it's hard, no matter which way you go about it. I do breastfeed. It's a lot cheaper than FF, and healthier for my LO, and I love the bond. That said it can be so exhausting and time consuming, and my LO has nursed like a champ from day one, I can completely understand why so many choose to FF.

 

The biggest shock I've had since becoming a mother is how many other women want to tell me how to raise my child, and how many people are plainly critical or oddly congratulatory of the choices I've made. Family, friends, in-laws, even strangers passing on the street seem to think it's their place to judge me, or worse judge themselves against me. It makes motherhood awfully lonely, when honest acceptance of one another's choices, and confidence in our own choices, would make us all happier.

 

I don't believe most pro-breastfeeding advocates intend to criticize, though it happens, as with any cause. I believe the real goal is to normalize breastfeeding, so that it doesn't have to happen behind closed doors, so that it is a real choice. My eldest sister had her first child 16 years ago in her early twenties, she has said to me that she wishes that she'd been older and more informed, so that she could have made different decisions, and stood up for herself when her in-laws pressured her to FF. I wish that breastfeeding hadn't seemed impossible to her.

rtjunker is offline  
#70 of 70 Old 05-01-2012, 10:13 AM
 
silvercloud3's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 20
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I SAY...'  IF BREASTFEEDING IN PUBLIC OFFENDS YOU ...THEN FEEL FREE TO PUT A BLANKET OVER YOUR HEAD !!
 

silvercloud3 is offline  
Reply

Tags
Lactivism

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off