But I don't WANT to CLW... - Mothering Forums

 
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#1 of 5 Old 01-25-2005, 12:35 AM - Thread Starter
 
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...and that makes me feel horrible.

It's not because I feel like I need to live up to the long list of AP standards that are out there. It's because my DS is so spirited but also very sensitive. I love nursing him but I hate nursing him all day long. Whenever I sit down to nurse DD (who is a year younger), he wants to nurse too. It's like he's saying "C'mon Ma, we all know you have two boobs, whip 'em out." I can't spend a moment sitting down without my lap being filled with babies. He wakes to nurse at night fairly often. I don't mind it so much but sometimes it doesn't feel right. Right before he finishes with a nursing session he starts chomping. He doesn't actually bite me, but the way he nurses hurts.

Some days when he asks to nurse, I offer him a drink, or a snack. Soemtimes he will take it but more often he'd prefer to nurse. Sometimes I say "No, you can nurse in ten minutes" and then make good on my word. Usually he cries until he is purple in the face while he waits for ten minutes to pass. I hate seeing him like that. I am a huge softy so I never know when I'm being too permissive. Sometimes I want to let him nurse as long as he pleases...then I remember that we want to TTC this year and I don't know if I can physically handle nursing three children at once. Nursing only one takes quite a bit out of me - nursing two makes me feel exhausted and starving all the time.

Sorry for the long gripe...I think I needed to get that off my chest. I don't think CLW is inherently bad, not at all. It's just tough right now, when half of me wants him to wean and half of me gets teary when I think of never nursing him again.

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#2 of 5 Old 01-25-2005, 12:50 AM
 
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awwww...each momma can only do whats right for her and her baby. Dont feel bad. I love nursing my DD but I dont plan on CLW. I'll still know I gave her the best possible start, and you should feel the same.
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#3 of 5 Old 01-25-2005, 01:57 PM
 
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I feel for you really I do. Ds weaned when I was pregnant with dd, I had/have mixed feelings about it, he was 25 months old, and I was ready but also sad.

I'm wrestling with CLW now with dd, who is 16 months, neither of us are ready to quit yet, but she nurses ALL the time day and night and it's wearing on me, I'd like to nurse a handful of times a day and she wants to hourly.

Anyway how about instead of "we can nurse in 10 minutes" how about we can nurse now, but only for 1,5,10 whatever minutes? I don't know if it would work, but you can always try. I never tandemed so I can only imagine. But remember you are doing a great job, and nursing is only one aspect of being a parent.

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#4 of 5 Old 01-25-2005, 03:11 PM
 
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Complete CLW didn't work for me either. I instigated weaning DD, ending when she was about 26 months and it was VERY gentle - no tears from anyone. She finally just stopped nursing... I never had to completely cut her off.

One thing that I realized as I started to nudge her towards weaning was how much of it was just habit. It was easier for me to offer the boob than to figure out what else she might need... I did it without even thinking. And then DD's language skills didn't really start to blossom until after she weaned so asking for milk was her way of asking for any number of comforts... she just couldn't verbalize them very well. Often when she asked for milk she was really saying she was hungry/thirsty/tired/needed attention/etc. So I would go through the whole list of possibilities before nursing her. Just saying "do you want a snack?" wasn't enough though since she didn't always make the connection... I had to go get a snack and set it in front of her to really see if that's what she wanted. If we went through the whole list and she was still insistent upon nursing, then we nursed. Slowly she would start to ask for the things other than milk that she wanted but I still had to do the list everytime she asked for about a month or so.
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#5 of 5 Old 01-26-2005, 01:50 PM
 
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I'm not sure if I can do it either. She will be two soon and sometims it's fine but othr times she's on me 24/7 and it driives me nuts not to mention the headstands and nipple pulling, ouch!!
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