I think I'm going to be sick - Page 7 - Mothering Forums
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#181 of 190 Old 06-30-2006, 04:06 PM
 
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Arwyn - that was so beautifully put that I wanted to cry. You have the true heart of a lactivist.

Wifey to Hubby, Mama to Boy (2004) and Girl (2009). 
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#182 of 190 Old 06-30-2006, 04:22 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elanorh
This caught my attention. A bit OT but I think it's interesting the different reactions we can have to bf struggles. I felt much like you while we were going through our ffing stage, our extensive supplementing stage, etc. (and beyond) .... I wasn't bitter or jealous or offended by breastfeeding lactivism at ALL. I agreed with it, 100% .... I was, I admit, sometimes jealous of those I knew for whom it was easy but honestly the people I was most angry towards were those who didn't bf at all, or gave up quickly (perhaps over something easily overcome with a few more days' work) --- because I *knew* those women could have bf'd their children perhaps with ease, and yet they didn't even try, whereas I was trying so very hard, and so afraid I'd end up formula-feeding in the end anyway. : .... And honestly, I must admit, I still have a little baggage in that respect. So I can understand lugging bf-related baggage around. It's just interesting that some of us who struggle(d) turned that anger towards ffing and a culture which holds it up as "what we do," and some of us have instead turned it, at least in part, against the very women who are fighting to support bfing and increase awareness and support of it for the very women who (sometimes) are angry at them.

Just a bit of a philosophical roundabout there I guess....

I really think in the end the parentheticals which are being inserted [ "(ff moms don't have any superpowers)" ] are a product of the interpretation of the individual --- I think it's clear that that is not the intent of the quote, it's not the way the vast majority of us (regardless of our bf experiences) interpret it. To me, it really does seem to tie into latent guilt about bf experiences. And - that's something which needs to be healed. No one doubts that you did the very best you could with the knowledge and resources available to you at the time, Pookel! Really. You're heroic to have made it as long as you did given the obstacles you had. And you have as much right to wear (and use) that blinkie as any other mom posting here, honestly. It's not intended as a judgement against ffing - it's an affirmation of the power of bfing. Very different things.
I totally agree. I felt the same way. I entirely admit I was jealous of successful breastfeeders, they were doing what I wanted so badly to do. But I never felt their pride was directed at me in a negative way. Everyone IRL and online knew I pumped and FOUGHT for every drop of breastmilk and I got nothing but kudos for that. No one ever accused me of not trying hard enough (interestingly, *I'm* the only one who has ever said I didn't try hard enough, but that's my own baggage). I always felt that I could use that "I make milk, what's your superpower" blinkie because I DID make milk. I completely saw it as applying to ME. The blinkie, as others have pointed out, doesn't say "I breasteed" or "I feed from the breast", it says I MAKE MILK. There IS a difference! If I had any anger, like the pp, it was directed at people who either never bf and could have, or EVEN MORE people I knew who did bf, had it so easy, and weaned early "just cause". Here I was exclusively pumping, taking herbs and drugs, and they weaned because they were tired of bf'ing?? THAT was a slap in the face. Not a mom who feels the WAY I DO, who obviously truly values making milk enough to call it a superpower. Those moms were the MOST supportive and as far as I am concerned, they are doing the struggling moms a favor by changing the societal message about bf'ing so that my pumping (and other struggling moms hard work) could be given the credit it deserved.

I can't stop thinking about this thread and I still completely stand by my view that the ff'ing blinkie is a direct slap in the face response to the pro-bf'ing blinkie. I don't know but I would imagine that the OP "felt sick" not so much because formula feeding makes her sick (even if it does) but because the blatant attempt to knock breastfeeding mothers down is sickening. It was a response to the creation of the blinkie, not to formula and not to ff'ing mothers.
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#183 of 190 Old 06-30-2006, 04:47 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucy VanPelt
It's interesting to me how you say it's not personal, but keeping bringing in your personal anecdotes, etc. That screams...something.
That I like to illustrate general arguments with personal stories?

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This is specifically to you, pookel: It's not about you. And, if you want to talk general issues you have with lactivism methods, please do so in your own, legitimate thread. That way, ppl can react to your OP and not feel the need to derail this thread further by addressing you.
Considering that THIS thread has been basically about that subject for the last, oh, eight pages or so, I have a hard time figuring out how continuing that conversation is "derailing" it.
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#184 of 190 Old 06-30-2006, 07:22 PM
 
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Do you know what "derailing" means?

I guess my last post was an accurate assessment of this situation.
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#185 of 190 Old 06-30-2006, 08:42 PM
 
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Ugh. On another board I go to, someone has this gloomy "Lizzie Borden was BREASTFED" icon. They also post about how wrong it is to nurse past infancy, how wrong it is to not cover up when NIP, they make fun of MDC smilies...don't even get me started.
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#186 of 190 Old 06-30-2006, 08:50 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pandora114
Well it DOES take talent to make formula dontcha know.

Talent to wake up in the middle of the night, not to trip over the various things strewn about the home on your way to the kitchen while balancing a screaming hungry baby on your hip.

Talent to accurately measure with eyes half shut with sleep both the formula and the water.

My goodness. It's serious talent to do all that while half asleep and not kill yourself! Especially if you have a 2 storey and the bedrooms are upstairs and the kitchen is downstairs!
i agree, it is really hard to formula feed........especially if your house is full of clutter, your cat steps around your feet as you walk in the dark.......you could kill yourself!

one of my motiviating factors of bf was just being lazy! having to sterlize, and wash, and measure, and heat then feed...........TO MUCH WORK! I love just popping out my boob while laying in bed at 2am and going back to sleep
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#187 of 190 Old 07-01-2006, 12:03 AM
 
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Originally Posted by romans_mum
one of my motiviating factors of bf was just being lazy! having to sterlize, and wash, and measure, and heat then feed...........
I have to ask, does anyone really sterilize anymore? I've always been told the dishwasher was sufficient, so that's all we used. No heating, no sterilizing ... just run warm tap water into the bottle, dump in formula, and shake. (Heck of a lot faster than getting positioned for nursing and getting him latched on right, but I realize I'm just unlucky in that department. )
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#188 of 190 Old 07-01-2006, 12:38 AM
 
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i think the only people who sterilize are people without dishwashers, or clean freaks, theres probably also the ones who fall into the "must have" trap.......eg with the diaper genie. I put everything of ds's in the dishwasher as well (pacis, teethers etc).

i wish i could pass on my natural latch sucess i was VERY VERY lucky in the fact that ds had a perfect latch from the first nursing. I'll probably pay for it down the line with other kids
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#189 of 190 Old 07-01-2006, 12:41 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pookel
I have to ask, does anyone really sterilize anymore? I've always been told the dishwasher was sufficient, so that's all we used. No heating, no sterilizing ... just run warm tap water into the bottle, dump in formula, and shake. (Heck of a lot faster than getting positioned for nursing and getting him latched on right, but I realize I'm just unlucky in that department. )
When I went back to work and school when my son was 9 months old, I sterlized everything. My pump parts and his bottles.
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#190 of 190 Old 07-01-2006, 12:43 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lovinmy2babies+1
When I went back to work and school when my son was 9 months old, I sterlized everything. My pump parts and his bottles.
when i used to pump, i did love the medela sterlizing bags for the microwave, i carry one in my diaper bag so i can sterlize ds's pacis or teethers when he drops them on the dirty ground.
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