I was kicked out of a store for nursing in the dressing room!!!! - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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Old 10-18-2007, 05:35 PM
 
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Originally Posted by eepster View Post
If you dicide to have a nurse in/out you should have it on blackfriday (day after thanksgiving.)
Isn't that too far away? Over a month?
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Old 10-18-2007, 05:59 PM
 
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Organizing a good nurse in/out take a little time, plus that is SUCH a high profile day for retail...

Mostly sane mother to twins.
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Old 10-18-2007, 07:51 PM
 
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I think the timing is ok.

I've been trying to figure out if I can find the name of a reporter from the Sentinel I believe. Her first name is Nancy, and she did a piece on a breastfeeding incident within the last year that was very fair and gave excellent voice to lactivists. It might have been the Applebees incident, but I'm not sure. She might be a good one to contact, if that's the case. If anyone can help me with the sleuthing, that would be great (I've been trying to look through many threads with no luck... she didn't post, but someone posted a link to her article).

Homeschooling mama to 6 year old DD.

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Old 10-18-2007, 08:31 PM
 
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I just received another email signed by Robin, even though I hadn't replied to the first one yet.

If you are interested in it let me know. I already forwarded it to the OP.
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Old 10-18-2007, 08:37 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Orlandomommy View Post
Here is the owners email address (as well as the store managers'):
[email protected]; [email protected]; [email protected]

If you could keep us posted if you write a letter (and/or get a response) I would greatly appreciate it. I think that if we barrage them with letters they will eventually catch on and hopefully never treat another mom that way!
Please remember that this is a public board. They can very easily track back here (we're googleable), so please be aware when posting any personal info.

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Old 10-18-2007, 08:48 PM
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Originally Posted by SashaBear View Post
Isn't that too far away? Over a month?
The Delta nurse-in was, I believe, about 5 months after the initial incident and the Applebee's nurse-in was 2 or so months after the fact. This is good since it gives the person involved time to pursue a satisfying resolution through regular channels such as working up the chain of command IMO. Obviously with a locally owned store with one or two franchises and already having dealt with the owner it probably won't take as long to work up the food chain as it does for a corporation like Delta and Applebee's.
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Old 10-18-2007, 09:08 PM
 
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Originally Posted by TovahNeryse View Post
I just received another email signed by Robin, even though I hadn't replied to the first one yet.

If you are interested in it let me know. I already forwarded it to the OP.
can you pm me Robin's second response?

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Old 10-18-2007, 09:15 PM
 
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me too please

I'm Andrea - I have three boys - 12 year old twins & an 11 year old

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Old 10-18-2007, 09:17 PM
 
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Originally Posted by TovahNeryse View Post
I just received another email signed by Robin, even though I hadn't replied to the first one yet.

If you are interested in it let me know. I already forwarded it to the OP.
I bet I got the same e-mail you did. I will forward mine to you and OP

ETA- It was adressed to LT, Stace and me. From a john@siegels online.com. Then signed by a robin@siegels online.com (I broke the links)

Let me know what's up

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Old 10-18-2007, 09:39 PM
 
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me too please
me too - I'm planning on emailing her too.
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Old 10-18-2007, 09:44 PM
 
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curious here too

Obstruct livery vehicles!

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Old 10-18-2007, 09:47 PM
 
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Mamas, if you want a PM, please just PM the person you want it from rather than posting it here. Thanks!

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Old 10-18-2007, 09:53 PM
 
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Question: Did anyone here feel that my email (posted earlier in thread) was "accusatory"? Because I honestly felt I bent over backwards to be neutral.

(I'm the "Stacie" of the group email, BTW)

Mostly sane mother to twins.
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Old 10-18-2007, 11:01 PM
 
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Your letter was very neutral. I think it was a general letter. Obviously they are on the defense so they are going to respond like that.

I'm waiting to hear the OP response before I reply again. I want to know how she feels about their version of the story.
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Old 10-18-2007, 11:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for the heads up on the email addresses in my earlier post. I have edited to remove my personal email address (but you can private message me and I'll give it to you!)

Can the person who quoted me in their reply re: cautioning us about posting email addresses and the tracability please edit your reply so my email address doesn't show up there?

Thanks!

As for the nurse in....if the store and Robin have acknowledged the error of her ways I'm not sure a nurse-in will do much good other than stirring up a pot of trouble. I am not trying to put them out of business or cause a national issue- I really just wanted Robin to know how offended I was.

However- if there are other nursing moms who feel passionately and want to hold a nurse-in I will be more than happy to lend my support in whatever way I can. I think I would wait to see what other kinds of responses we get. I have a feeling the emails are not being sent directly from Robin but rather being filtered through a "neutral voice" to appease us. If they get nasty then I will be 100% in support of a nurse-in. However, if they are of an appologetic tone I'm hesitant to amplify the issue.
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Old 10-19-2007, 12:23 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Orlandomommy View Post
As for the nurse in....if the store and Robin have acknowledged the error of her ways I'm not sure a nurse-in will do much good other than stirring up a pot of trouble. I am not trying to put them out of business or cause a national issue- I really just wanted Robin to know how offended I was.

However- if there are other nursing moms who feel passionately and want to hold a nurse-in I will be more than happy to lend my support in whatever way I can. I think I would wait to see what other kinds of responses we get. I have a feeling the emails are not being sent directly from Robin but rather being filtered through a "neutral voice" to appease us. If they get nasty then I will be 100% in support of a nurse-in. However, if they are of an appologetic tone I'm hesitant to amplify the issue.
Oh, I totally agree. There's no need for a nurse-in if they are apologetic and seem to understand what happened. As far as I can see, however, that hasn't happened - am I wrong? (I haven't seen any of the emails myself) Just because the emails aren't nasty, doesn't make this a resolved issue. They need to acknowledge that what happened was not acceptable, and indicate that it won't happen again.

A nurse-in won't put them out of business, I promise you that. It probably won't affect their business much at all, but would (hopefully) just put the spotlight on them for a minute. And even if that happens, everyone will forget about it a week later. C'est la vie.

Homeschooling mama to 6 year old DD.

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Old 10-19-2007, 03:50 PM
 
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Orlandomommy, Please read the letter I forwarded to you. Robin was not apologetic, she blamed the incident on you.

I would like to know your response so we can go from there.
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Old 10-19-2007, 04:25 PM
 
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Orlandomommy, Please read the letter I forwarded to you. Robin was not apologetic, she blamed the incident on you.

I would like to know your response so we can go from there.
Unreal. And so sad. :

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Old 10-19-2007, 04:28 PM
 
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Can anyone loosely paraphrase this letter?

Homeschooling mama to 6 year old DD.

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Old 10-19-2007, 05:02 PM
 
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I'm from Orlando although currently my dh is stationed in hawaii so we're not there. I'll be glad to do anything I can to help. I have lots of friends in Orlando and will pass along this information to them as well.
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Old 10-20-2007, 12:35 AM - Thread Starter
 
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To paraphrase she claimed I was in the dressing room for an abnormal length of time and she lost customers who were waiting to try things on.
I really wish I could pull surveilance tapes- from the time that my daughter woke up to the time I left the dressing room (after she had asked me for the second time to leave) was less than 5 minutes. I tried on 2 pairs of shorts before my daughter got fussy so maybe I was in the dressing room for a grand total of 7 minutes???

I will admit that I was shocked when she asked me to leave (the first time I was polite and told her I would only be a few minutes) the second time I got snippy. And, as I left I was furious and told a salesclerk outside (as well as a customer) how angry I was....and ofcourse, by the time I went back in to confront her my blood was boiling and I told her my attorney would be getting involved.

The other thing that her response letter indicated was that since it had been an abnormal amount of time that I was in the dressing she LOOKED IN and that's how she knew i was breastfeeding!!! First of all...ewwwww....

Second of all- I was sitting on the bench nursing and did not see her look into my dressing room. In any event- what kind of owner looks in a dressing room when she knows a customer is in there???? Isn't that like peeping????

I'm at a loss for how to proceed from here. Here's the issue- the owner and I are involved in similar organizations. In fact, there was a dinner tonight that I was supposed to go to that she was at. Her family has a lot of money, and because of that, power in this community. I am just starting a new business and have to protect my reputation so I don't want to be the center of any "drama"-that being said I feel like more needs to be done. I just don't know what.....
Jodi
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Old 10-20-2007, 11:28 PM
 
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Hmmm ... that does put you in a pretty tough spot I'm sorry.
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Old 10-20-2007, 11:44 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Orlandomommy View Post
I'm at a loss for how to proceed from here. Here's the issue- the owner and I are involved in similar organizations. In fact, there was a dinner tonight that I was supposed to go to that she was at. Her family has a lot of money, and because of that, power in this community. I am just starting a new business and have to protect my reputation so I don't want to be the center of any "drama"-that being said I feel like more needs to be done. I just don't know what.....
Jodi

Hmm, I think the damage (if that's how you perceive it) has already been done. Maybe if you are unsure about the long-term consequences of something it would be better to refrain from action for awhile in the future? I'm sure they know that you have engaged in a campaign against them just from the emails.

I'm really sorry about what happened to you and I'm even sorrier that you feel like you need to be quiet about this issue. Ultimately it is your call, so you need to do what is right for your circumstance just as everyone has the right to speak out if they feel called to do so.
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Old 10-21-2007, 01:47 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Orlandomommy View Post
I'm at a loss for how to proceed from here. Here's the issue- the owner and I are involved in similar organizations. In fact, there was a dinner tonight that I was supposed to go to that she was at. Her family has a lot of money, and because of that, power in this community. I am just starting a new business and have to protect my reputation so I don't want to be the center of any "drama"-that being said I feel like more needs to be done. I just don't know what.....
Jodi
Jodi,
I might be able to help. I'm working with some of the other Applebee's organizers on creation of a new national grassroots breastfeeding advocacy organization. Maybe you could "report" your story to them, and then be done with it. A formal, professional conversation could be conducted between the nonprofit and store owner, and you could move on with your life and business. This way how you could remove yourself from the drama, but still know that something was being done. Being subjected to discrimination really can be exhausting! You've brought the situation to light, now you're fully entitled to step back from the limelight and go back to regular life. Hang in there.
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Old 10-21-2007, 05:45 PM
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Originally Posted by Orlandomommy View Post
I'm at a loss for how to proceed from here. Here's the issue- the owner and I are involved in similar organizations. In fact, there was a dinner tonight that I was supposed to go to that she was at. Her family has a lot of money, and because of that, power in this community. I am just starting a new business and have to protect my reputation so I don't want to be the center of any "drama"-that being said I feel like more needs to be done. I just don't know what.....
Jodi
Unless you can locate someone else who was treated similarly in the not-too-distant past, it doesn't seem to me like it will be possible to extricate yourself from further actions if directed at this particular store.

Would you find more support (and less chance of alienating people important to your business venture) if you broadened the focus of further public activity to raising awareness about the importance of BFing, and how commercial ventures can support public health by making BF-friendly choices for both their workers and their customers?

Less of a "nurse-in" protest, but more of a "we want to engage the business community" kind of action? Are there any businesses in your area that are particularly BF-friendly? Could you hold an "un-protest" to celebrate those business's approach?
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Old 11-06-2007, 05:19 PM
 
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These people are just general charmers all around. I would boycott their store, but, you know, I don't live anywhere near it.

Mostly sane mother to twins.
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Old 11-14-2007, 11:12 PM
 
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nevermind.
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