I know they don't mean to be annoying... - Mothering Forums

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Old 05-23-2004, 04:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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...but people have GOT to stop calling me to see "how everything's going!?!?!?!" I know they are all waiting for baby news, and they are calling out of love and excitement, but they're driving me nuts!

My mother has called every day for the past week, my father has even called twice (he NEVER makes the call, usually lets me mom do it and then he will say hello later), my aunt, dh's mother, grandmother and brothers, many friends.... we are getting on average 3-4 calls a day from people "just checking in". HELLO!!! Do you thnik we'll forget to let you know when the baby comes??????

Sure, I could just ignore the phone... but all that does is make them call back over and over again, thinking something is happening that they need to know about.

Sorry for the crazy vent, but I just had to let it out! : If I didn't let it out here, I might seriously go off on someone, and I don't want to do that. I know they don't mean to be or even realzie they are being annoying... but that doens't mean they aren't getting on my nerves!

Can I get a witness???? :LOL

Megan
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Old 05-23-2004, 04:58 PM
 
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You got a witness, sista! :LOL
We left an outgoing message on our answering machine that basically says "we're not here, but that DOESN'T MEAN THERE'S A BABY!! We will LET YOU KNOW when there is!!"
And we are determined not to answer our phone. My MIL keeps calling and I can't even go on IM because she will IMMEDIATELY message me with SOME annoying thing.
I hear you.
On my EDD (last wednesday) a friend emailed a list I belong to with her and several other friends with "happy due date!" in the subject.
Then on the same day a friend called me at midnight to "see how I was".
Yeah. I'm still gestating, thanks!

Good luck, Megan! I'm sure we're not the only ones here! Vent away!

-Renae
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Old 05-23-2004, 07:34 PM
 
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sending you both hugs and please-stop-calling-us-vibes...

Precisely the reason I have avoided sharing a specific date with anyone. My best friend who is a nurse has figured out my exact due date, but at least she is smart enough to know that less than 4% of babies are born on their due date. My mom and sister were at our first prenatal so they know the date our midwives gave us then, but I've told them babies will be born when they need to be born, not sooner or later. My sister arrives on Wednesday to stay for 3 weeks and hopefully be here for the birth, so she will not pester me. And my mom calls me practically on a daily basis anyway, so I don't think I will find it annoying.

I think we will still turn off the phone and turn down the volume on the answering machine in about a week or so if people start to bother us.

warmly,
claudia
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Old 05-24-2004, 10:14 AM
 
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as i've stated before, i love my mil dearly :ignore and i swear if she doesn't stop calling i'm gonna crush the phone one day. worst is, she works in the ob dept of a hospital and keeps telling me those horrifying birthing stories...
strange thing is, our babysitter keeps calling, if we had the baby yet, he's the one who's supposed to watch ds while we have the baby!!! the guy even called the hospital on the weekend to see if i had been admitted, just cause i dared to take a nap and turned that darned phone off.
i'm seriously thinking about having this baby and not telling ANYONE, 'xept my mom.
when we had ds, dh and me originally said for the next baby we wouldn't tell anybody the edd, but then they'd probably be calling for months, instead of weeks, right?!
i'm sick of it...
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Old 05-24-2004, 10:47 AM
 
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This is driving me crazy too! We finally changed the outgoing message on the answering machine because I couldn't handle talking to my mom that frequently. It seems every time we spoke she was able to slip some other irritating thing into the conversation, and I was afraid I would have some huge blow up with her the day before the baby came. Now she can get the message and not worry if I don't call her back promptly.

We already set up a webpage with daily updates, but people seem to read it and think, "gee, maybe I should call them just to be sure!" I just don't get it- why can't people understand that we will call them when we have news and just let it be?!! I mean, really. I'm not going to FORGET to call my own stinking mother when I have a baby. She was super aggressive about insisting that I call her when I go to the hospital, even when I was explaining that nobody in my house would be in a position to be calling ANYONE by the time I was ready to go to the hospital. grrrrrrrrrrrr.

At least I have just two weeks left, if that. My due date is tomorrow, btw.
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Old 05-24-2004, 03:00 PM
 
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I'm right there with you mamas! I swear if I could reach thru the phone and strangle MIL, I would!!!! And it is true here too-if we don't answer they just keep calling and calling and calling and calling..........

The next time MIL calls (read: tonight when she calls) I'm gonna mess w/her and be like "ohhhhh, yeaaaaahh, I knew there was something I forgot to tell you..."

Even my relatives who understand that 1) edd's are estimates and 2) I gestate longer are starting to bug us. Maybe I'll just disconnect the phone. Yeah, I know everyone means well and they are excited/can't wait, but how the freak do they think I feel?!! I'm the one carrying the load! Sheesh.

Thanks for letting me vent, though it seems that's all I do anymore. **sigh**
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Old 05-24-2004, 04:07 PM
 
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I think we've all BTDT .... I highly suggest you turn your ringer down - or off - and the answering machine on - with an edited message!!

"thanks for all your calls and concerns, but there is no baby yet - we are just trying to get our rest before the big moment, because we know there won't be any rest afterwards. We promise, we will call with news when there is news. And thanks for respecting our 'resting time'. "

or some such thing.



I am getting worried about my MIL. I DO love my MIL, but I could never live with her... and she is in Florida now (we are in PA) and she wants to come up for a 'week or three' when the new one comes!! I think a long weekend is enough!! At least we still have a few months to figure a way out of it!!!
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Old 05-24-2004, 05:22 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Soontobe3
"thanks for all your calls and concerns, but there is no baby yet - we are just trying to get our rest before the big moment, because we know there won't be any rest afterwards. We promise, we will call with news when there is news. And thanks for respecting our 'resting time'. "
This is a truly excellent message; mind if we use it? :LOL
Good luck with your MIL. I totally know how you feel. Mine said to "expect visits every WEEK" (!!!:!!!) and we HAD to just tell her "NO". It was hard, but we need our rest and time together as a new family!
*sigh*
I have been trying to be patient myself, but with every day that passes with no labor in sight...well, it's been rough.
Good luck everyone!

-Renae
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Old 05-26-2004, 12:29 AM
 
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hmmmm...off to change the message on my machine.

I really feel for those of you who are getting 8 million phone calls per day. Our machine has been working overtime because we never pick up the phone. I'm struggling with all of the people who want us to call them "as soon as labor starts".
I've told everyone who has asked that no one is getting a phone call. We may not call for a day or two after the baby arrives just to keep the riff raff away.

DS 6 DD 8
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