Caroline: Keep an eye on the swelling, okay? The fingers is what scares me.... usually swelling is okay until it goes to your face and hands..... do you have a bp monitor at home? I take mine at least 3x/day now...
Ketilave: : I don't know! I thought I was just tired all the time... I do have to say I have SO much more energy now that I'm on the iron!! I thought I was just pregnant and tired with a toddler
Lena: I am totally thinking about this toddler/baby thing. Libby is still at such a needy age! She's 18 months and rightfully so, demanding of my attention.... she plays nicely by herself, but still needs ME a lot.... and AHHH, how do you do that? I just want to lay in bed and snuggle this baby and kiss her feet and nurse all day! How do I do that WITH a toddler??? (I know the answer and it lies in a small black case labelled "Blues Clues DVD's" : ) I'm sure I'm not the only mom whose kid is going to get WAY more tv than normal those first few months!!
Traci: Hang in there! Don't over do it!! It's SO painful when you overdo it isn't it??? You're like a wallowing whale the rest of the day!
Jenn: Sounds like a good, boring appointment! I like that kind
MealyMama: NAK equals Nursing at Keyboard
Alrighty I'm off to beddiebye
Thanks for the diaper I am cracking up, because I said a few months ago.... Oh, we'll just use sposies till she can wear smalls, i don't want to fuss with getting newborn diapers.... and then... well... I don't know
Originally Posted by ketilave
I have decided on abstinence so that I can have a year off - at least that is fool proof.
Hey, check out the first birth story posted on the July moms birth stories. It's a doozy. 45 min. labor. WOW. Can any of us be so lucky!!!
I'm headed for bed, I have a busy next couple of days so any sleep I can get will be good.
Have a nice evening ladies.
I forgot to mention my sister called and asked for her maternity clothes back!!! Looks like she is due in Feb. She is going to insist on an ultrasound at her first visit as she has twins that turned a year last month. As tired as I am and worn completely out, the thought of 2 of my 2 year olds while trying to deal with morning sickness... her boys are identical too- so anything is possible.
Anyone else bothered by smells again? DH had an onion on his hot dog last night and I couldn't enter the kitchen. 3 days in a row DS3 has has a super smelly (to me) diaper that I can't change. Thankfully dd has not objected to helping there. He was doing so well with the potty training till my last trip. I will be switching to cloth while on maternity leave so maybe that will motivate him? I had 18 months of 2 in diapers and I really would like to have him train sooner than that!
We were planning to be foster parents, dh had a vasectomy... "our" plans were set.
The day before our foster parent *final walkthrough* to get licensed (we had been told we would have a baby in our home THAT week, so this was the end) I woke up feeling kinda icky... and tested +.
It all worked out though
Oh and about potty training. I was hoping to have my 2 yr. old daughter out of dipers before this one arrived too. She was doing so good for a while but she is stubborn and if it's not her idea it doesn't work. My pediatrician also told me that training this close to the new babies birth that most kids regress when the new baby arrives. Just FYI.
Kimberly: So cool about being Foster parents. We too have considered this. Also considered adoption. This may be our last pg. No one is getting fixed any time soon though. We still have a lot of praying to do before we leap into it. I would love to talk more about it with you sometime!
Well, I got most of the laundry done yesterday. I still have some of it to fold and put away. I seem to get more done on the days I have daycare kids. I think it is because my DD has a playmate and I don't have the option of just laying around. I have to be up and looking after them so at the same time I can pick up around the house.
My daycare mom is going to babysit my daughter tonight. She has been asking to take her home for quite some time. Our DD's both play well together. My hubby is in his friends wedding tomorrow so the rehersal dinner is tonight. My DH and I prefered to think of the dinner portion as a date. We have not had a time out together without our daughter in quite some time. In fact, I think it was last Augusts to one of his company appretiation dinners. Anyway, it will be nice to have some time with him.
Have a wonderful day ladies.
magemom- smells are bothering me again. I've been keeping a spray bottle of water w/ lavender oil in it to try to make my house smell nice for a little while.
Ap- take it easy, you don't want to have worn out your poor little body before your baby even gets here. I'm glad you got your outfit. It sounds nice. We are actually taking preemie clothes to the hospital with us. With DS I remember nothing fit and my mom had to run to wal-mart to try to find the smallest sleepers she could. Of course I don't expect them to fit long, but it will be nice right away.
Bears - I hear ya. I think I might be starting to develop the "preggo waddle" Such a huge difference it seems between, say 32+ weeks and 28-30 weeks. It seems like I suddenly got huge and slow!
ketilave - We don't have exes, but BTDT with my parent's exes. SOme people just seem unstable. I remeber my mom's best friend had triplets but they were born early and all died. Her husband's ex sent announcements to all the baby stuff companies so they all sent her "congrats" letters and stuff. Then every year on the anniversary of their death she sends a card from the babies about how "you don't love us anymore" Unstable!
Sorry for all the swelling issues. So far so good for me. Actually, I've managed to avoid all those end of pregnancy things so far (heartburn, ect.). But I'm sure that won't last. I have been feeling icky though. Very tired and kinda nauseus. I can't wait for DH to get home. I've been carrying my cell phone around all day just in case he manages to be able to call me that I won't miss it. So far nothing My house is a mess. I just can't seem to stay motivated long enough to get everything done each day. Hopefully I'll start nesting soon, b/c my house NEEDS it!
My largest diaper order is almost done She just needs to put on a few snaps and finish an applique on a blanket for friends of ours. She has sent me a few pictures as she worked on it. If you want to see go to http://imageevent.com/jacobsquilting...icrofleece?n=0 and look at pictures 111-123. I am so excited to get them. I've been waiting until I get all my diapers to wash them so I can do seperate loads for hemp and non-hemp since the hemp will need to be washed so many times. I have already done all my prefolds though. She's going to take pictures of it all when it's done and I'll post those too.
Hope you all are having a wonderful day. Tick tock, tick tock, July is almost here
I know all about hte regression and toddler diapering. My daughter was 17 months and bringing a baby in the home trained her- babies wear diapers and she wasn't a baby. With ds3- the baby wears diapers so can i. The baby was 16 months before he trained. It was forced on my part. I told him diapers were going away in 2 weeks and we counted down. Boy did he cry but now he is so proud. ds3 will pee but has never pooped on the potty. he started and cried, got down and pooped all over the floor Hopefully he will be motivated when the baby is in diapers. DD mentioned she is looking forward to new baby diapers because they DON'T smell- lol.
Originally Posted by lena_girl
Has anyone with a toddler been thinking about what it's going to be like with a new babe plus an active munchkin? I remember how it was when DS was a newborn and I just can't imagine being able to do things the same, like taking naps during the day and such. Even things like nursing the baby when we are out, I just can't imagine DS being willing to sit there and wait.
Nursing won't be too much trouble, even on the go, I got pretty good at nursing Boo in a sling, and will do a LOT more of that this time around I imagine. There is no way that Boo will be willing to sit and wait for his sibling to eat. Just isn't going to happen !
Yeah, I worry - in fact, I worry a LOT about what it will be like. But my grandma had all her babies close and managed (Uncle *B* in '46, my mom in Aug '50 and Uncle *F* in Jun '51). If she can, I can !
Jesse (July '09)
Just a quick one here...Reading everyone's posts. But I had to respond to the smell thing that magemom mention. My smell sensitivity is WAY strong. There's some work going on at the top of our street and they are laying down some tar. Well, we went by it yesterday and had to stop at the corner for awhile. The smell was almost unbearable to me. I thought I was going to vomit. And DH said that it really was just a normal tar/macadam smell-not a pleasant smell, but not overwhelming.
Feeling like someone made me run a marathon in my sleep. My circulation must just be terrible b/c some nights all my extremities seem to fall asleep and get tingly on and off throughout the evening. I'm sure it has something to do with my weight gain, though. I am officially 2 lbs. higher 6 WEEKS before my EDD than I was the day DS was born.
DH just suggested heading out to do some baby shopping at some outlets. Oh, boy, I better take advantage of this opportunity!
Need a little this morning, ladies. Hope you all have a great day.
I am 34 weeeeeks!! YIPPEEE!!!!
So, Laurie: Did you see my message about how close we are?? I seriously go visit Keith at school a couple times a month too! So sometime, I will have to come see you when we have our babies!!
Bears: The smell thing is WICKED! I am on a mission constantly, and it drives dh crazy! I'm like "I smell mildew! How many days has it been since you've scrubbed the toilets and the shower??" : I will be across the house and say "WHY haven't you changed her diaper??? It reeks of urine" and she's peed like a minute earlier
We do intend to foster and/or adopt special needs at some point in our lives.
At this point, dh is planning to apply in January for a 2 year program in Hong Kong teaching elementary school. IF he gets it... we'll probably do foster parenting in HK, because we found a really neat organization there. You foster babies until their international adoption goes through... so, from birth until the adoption is finalized at a year or so...
Sigh.... Hong Kong... I miss it so much!
Originally Posted by lena_girl
My largest diaper order is almost done She just needs to put on a few snaps and finish an applique on a blanket for friends of ours. She has sent me a few pictures as she worked on it. If you want to see go to http://imageevent.com/jacobsquilting...icrofleece?n=0 and look at pictures 111-123.
Free To Be~
"Living is learning and when kids are living fully and energetically and happily they are learning a lot, even if we don't always know what it is."
Originally Posted by kimberlylibby
HEHEHEHEHE, Traci, that's Crystal's CLoth's custom order page... she posts pictures as she works on orders
Lena DOES have a juicy big order though
Heh Heh Heh (rubbing hands together in an extremely evil way)
My order will be in the mail on monday I can't wait
Well, looks like we will be having storms on and off until Wednesday of next week. We have had so much rain lately. It's good as far as watering the lawn go's. Lower water bill! Yeah!!! But the gloomyness outside usually makes me feel tired and have less energy.
I have to say, I really am surprised at how much better I have felt this pregnancy. I know that by this point last time i was in the lets just get it over with please...phase. I'm hoping not to get that feeling this time. Just excitement for the upcomming birth.
Have a great evening ladies. I can't wait to spend some quality time with my hubby w/o little Breaunna. I love her but I look forward to just time with the DH.
Totally Laurie! Our daughters are pretty similar in ages, too! Libby's tall enough to be a 2yo She's 34 1/2" and 27.5 lb Course she's still skin bald And, oddly enough, I had a m/c last August too...
Well, I'm having a contraction-filled day, so Libby and I are going to go take a bath... she bath time!
i've been so uncomfortable all day today, kinda crampy - baby is feeling lower and lower each day...amazing the changes our bodies go thru...
i spent part of the morning cleaning out the hall closets - i'm tired of being a slave to junk and clutter and i am trying to get better organized while i can! i got our craft closet cleaned completely now - just need to finish the other closet at the end of the hall that's full of holiday stuff and baby stuff...sigh...lol
i won't be online at all tomorrow probably, maybe not on sunday either - it's our 5th anniversary and we're going to be gone to a festival that dh is singing at in alabama. we'll go to church on sunday then the il's are watching our kiddos so we can go eat dinner and watch a movie. i'm excited, haven't seen a movie in ages!
This is me trying not to be a stranger/lurker...
Heartburn hit yesterday. I am 31/32 weeks and I guess I was expecting it, though glad it didn't hit any sooner. It's still totally bearable/controllable. I told my midwife that I need to remember that all these "symptoms" are just nice little reminders from my body of the things I need to do to take care of myself. It would be so much worse if I just suddenly hit a catastrophic breakdown, instead of just a little heartburn and swelling to remind me that me and the baby both need more water! (More water is my midwife's answer to EVERYTHING!)
I weighed myself today and am only at +22 pounds, but my home (read, not very reliable...) scale anyway. That's more than I wanted, but maybe this time I'll avoid gaining 40 pounds? Both my kids were born at 3 am, weighing 8 lb 8 oz, after I had gained exactly 40 pounds. Weird.
As my belly gets bigger I wonder how my fil lives like this all the time! He has a big round belly, and though I watch him roll over to get up, and have his wife tie his shoes, and in other ways use all the coping techniques I do...I wonder why in the world he chooses to stay like that! I certainly couldn't cope with it for the rest of my life. (8-9 more weeks is bad enough!)
I certainly hear everyone on worrying how to cope with a newborn and a toddler. You would think I would know how, having done it once already, but last night was the pits! and does not bode well for the future. DS was up having a tantrum (or 2 or more) from 2:30-3:30, and then dh and I had a fight about it, and then we were both awake for another hour plus. UGh. At least I got to sleep in, dh went to work on about 4 hours of sleep. He promised he'd take a nap before he drove home. Anyway, I think that sleep deprivation will be the rule, not the exception. And yes, slings really help!
Lena-I can't believe your mom's best friend and the ex! That is one of the most horrible things I have ever heard! I remember getting some interesting advice, "Marry who you will, but be really careful who you have kids with, because you are stuck with them forever!" Unfortunately it seems to be very true.
Oh, and on the diaper stashes...it is such a good thing that I don't know for sure that we are having a girl! It would be so tempting to sell off most of my unisex stash and make a whole new cutesy girl stash! Maybe next time...or of course, there are always the mediums
Well, that's enough of a novel-I have to run to the post office. May we all know just when to nest, and when to rest!
Mommy to Meg 5/00, Peter 6/02, #3 due 8/04 (sometime...)
Toddler/baby concerns - DS was 16 months to the day when we brought DD home. Right now they are amazing together and I can't imagine them without each other. Every morning they kiss each other and are so excited to play together. Brannon hates it when Amelia has to take a nap - he wants her to stay up and play. Now I will admit that she is hitting that 12 - 15 month phase I hate encouraged by her brothers 2 yo behaviour so someone is always whining, crying or having some form of meltdown - I am ready to move out - but if this is the worst of it thank God. Brannon watched tv for the first time when I brought Amelia home. It was a treat for him when I just needed to sit down and give her a good feed (not the shoved on, in the sling hurry up and eat kind). And, Amelia has had tv and lollipops and things Brannon had never heard of at this point in his life but I just get through each phase and know as long as I stay in charge we will all come out of it ok. Postpartum was much more difficult than with Brannon but this time I refuse to leave my house for at least the first 5 days. You prove nothing to anyone by racing out of the house or downstairs to clean. I am not after being a super mom or super woman just me doing the best I can and right by my kids, family and ME! But this is baby #3 and I had to learn the hard way!
Dipes - my kids are burdened with plain ol' white diapers!! It's a good thing I don't know anyone that cd's or they would have butt envy!! I do need to order some for the newbie but I just keep putting it off. Nesting is not happening around here - no energy to clean or do anything but I am becoming very reclusive and want to cower behind DH all the time.
I am kind of late posting. After the night that I didn't sleep, the next night I went to bed with ds and slept good all night. Boy, did I need it! Had the mw appt and it went well. Baby is still head down and I am measuring right on for dates. I sat and watched dh talk to the mw a little, and could see in his face how happy and excited he is about the baby coming. It really warmed my heart!
ketileve-thanks for your kind supportive words about labor. They helped. The mw's also helped by telling me that labor is something we need to get emotionally ready for rather than physically. They told me to lay off reading and trying to prepare for labor by practicing on pain techniques and just try to learn to relax and let go of the fear.
I think I do have some fears to let go of, but I think that I will have to face them in labor. I have noticed that my body will get extremely hot or cold at times when I talk about the baby's birth. I really HATED my c/s, and everything about it, so I think that I am afraid of something going wrong and losing all control again. I tried talking to a counselor about it before, but she really didn't help. I just think that once I am in the situation (labor), I will be able to confront whatever I am feeling at the time and work through it. In the meantime, I will listen to the birthing affirmations, etc to remind myself that my body CAN do this and WILL! I also look at my son, and realize, c/s or not, he is the most beautiful thing in the world, and it is worth it just to have him.
Lena-I would say that ex is more than just unstable, that is just evil!
Kimberlylibby-I used to license foster parents, and we used to talk about fp'ing as a good conception tool. We had several families who didn't think they could even conceive children get pregnant several months after being licensed.
Although my son is preschooler age, I can also empathize with how is this baby going to fit in, etc. I know that for the longest time, all dh and I did was sit and stare at the baby. Not going to be possible this time! Ds will be in preschooler for a few hours a week, but I think this baby will be slinging it a lot more than ds did. I also think that the transition might be a little difficult too in the respect that ds will remember the before/after baby a bit more than toddlers. He is excited though, and I have to share a story before I go...
Ds had an eyelash on his hand, and we told him to blow it and make a wish. He did, and I asked him what he wished for and he said, "For Nora(baby) to come." He said this on Mother's day, and it just made my day. They can just be so darn sweet sometimes!
(As in, Ok, now the baby's viable.... Ok, now the baby has a fighting chance, Ok, now the baby has a good chance...) but for someone with your history it must be really frightening. You must be an extremely brave woman, and you're going to be rewarded for it with the best gift of all! Congratulations on getting to your 34 week point, and here's to keeping her in there a while longer!
I've been trying to do as much as possible with DD lately to make up for the one-on-one she's going to lose when arrives. We went innertubing the other day. She sat in the tube with me and when we went over "rapids" she clung to me but was so good about not "smooshing" her sister. I took her to a matinee today and she wanted to know if Amelia was watching the movie through my belly-button It was so cute! She pats and kisses my belly, and talks about her on and on. I've tried not to initiate too much conversation about it because I don't want her to feel jealous, and I want these last weeks to be her time, but every other thing out of her mouth is "my sister this" "Amelia that" She's such a good girl. Lately I've been butting heads with her more than usual, but I'm starting to think it's just me and my crazy hormones, and nothing she's doing.
What do you do when people walk by with their dogs and don't curb them, or even stop to let your children pet them? DD is raised around animals and she just can't understand the concept that some animals bite. The first thing she does when a dog goes by is reach out to it. I will pull her away, but sometimes, like today, people will actually ease up on the leash so that the dog can follow her, even when they see me pulling her away! Today I had to pick her up, but it would have been too late if the dog had wanted to bite her. And the man looks at me and says "He don't bite." Yeah, well, the next dog might! I mean, I believe that most people know their dogs and wouldn't let them approach a child if the dog wasn't friendly. It doesn't change the fact that they're undoing what I'm trying to teach her about not approaching strange animals. Ooooh, I was so burned up, but like I usually do when I'm on the spot, I just froze up and walked away without saying anything.
Dumb, dumb me.
And DD came home from her dad's with a HappyMeal toy... I have long ago given up on trying to control what she eats when she's with her father... but what made me crazy was that the toy was a truck, and the first thing she says to me when she walks in the door is "I'm giving this to Eli (my friend's son) because girl's don't play with trucks."
I had to hold back my temper b/c she was in her dad's arms but I glared at him and he shrugged as if he had no idea where she picked that idea up. After he left I asked her who told her that and of course, it was my ex-MIL who ex still lives with (he's 31!).
So I know this is minor league stuff compared to the emotional warfare that some people involve their children in, but big 's to everybody who has to struggle every day to accept that they cannot always control what their children and step children are exposed to.
Re: foster parenting. I think it's great. My parents are foster parents. I also have an adopted brother. I *think* they might end up adopting one of the foster kids they have now too. I think I'd like to do that someday too, but not until we are done having all of our own kids. We know we aren't done yet (God willing).
Lizabear, I hear you. That would be so nice right now.
I'm going to go eat some ice cream, some with lots of chocolate in it.
Liza-I'd be very willing to give you massage if I could get one, too! DH says he really needs one lately and I just keep ignoring him. It's so terrible, I know. But I am all about MY needs right now!
Oh, and I had to use the little devil smiley b/c that's how I feel right now! I am terribly grumpy and I sort of want the world to stop for a moment and focus on me and my being uncomfortable. We had a GREAT day of shopping and being out and about. DS was just wonderful-didn't even run off too much-amazing! And then tonight, although he was soooo tired, he was just cranky and very upset that I had to cut our bedtime nursing session short.
Speaking of nursing, who else is nursing another child right now??? I forget. Let me tell ya, it's not been easy for me since probably January.Many nights it feels like nails on a blackboard to me when we nurse. It takes almost every ounce of my being to stop myself from pulling him off of me and running from the room. But he just LOVES it, and I've never known *how* to go about weaning him. It's only 1-2x/day, but sometimes I get sooo frustrated. I discussed this at one of my LLL meetings months ago and spoke about how frustrated I was and whether it was worth it or not to try to continue (even though, like I said, I don't really know how to STOP). And she said that our kids want us whether we're grumpy, frustrated, stinky, etc. So, anyway, sorry for the vent... :
Kimberly-I'm so sorry you've had to endure so much loss over the past few years...
Frog & Jl-Enjoy your time with your DH. We are in desperate need of some DS-free time. I'm hoping to get in at least one long afternoon of babysitting from the ILs before the baby is born. But the ILs are very busy people and I have to make a "date" well in advance. We'll see when we can get that movie in.
Ketilave-Again, I'm sorry you have to deal with all this Ex crap. Sounds AWFUL. Also, it's so hard to keep in mind that with kids most everything is a stage. It's particularly hard when you're a first-time mom. And now that I'm about 2.5 years into this mothering thing I already feel like I've at once learned so much and also don't know a thing
Ilove-I'm trying to get my head in the right place for this labor, too. My first birth was full of interventions. And I'm hoping to free my mind enough of that experience to acknowledge that THIS BIRTH IS DIFFERENT. I'm not the same person, my bod's not the same, etc. I'm reading BFW (AP is taking the classes) and it's really a great book. Lots of pain management techniques, but mostly perspective changers for me, if that makes any sense. I want to really KNOW that I can do this birthing thing-in my soul! And I'm getting there, slowly...
Hey Mealy! Laying in an intertube sounds WONDERFUL right now... sunshine
Spending a lot of $$$ we don't have this week. Just ordered some nursing tanks and my sling... And today I bought a bunch of new onesies and little kimono shirts and a few sleepers for our new little one. Feels great, actually, to be prepping and getting so close. Great and scary all at once.
Anyone else feeling very anti-social lately??? We have a few parties coming up and I just don't want to go. I feel big and lumbering and I not much to wear that's comfortable anymore. Plus, I'm a little grumpy. Not a "glowing" prego lady at this point...
AP-I loved the Granola Threads site. Might just order a onesie from them, too. DH might have a small heart attack, but hey...the baby needs some things!
Okay, once again, it's a Bearsmama novel. Sorry guys, it's all comes out here with my pregnant friends!
Originally Posted by LizaBear
Anyone want to come over to give me a back rub / massage ?
In July I am going for another full body massage. End of July I am going to start pedicures. I love having my feet rubbed and a massage where no one expects anything from me when they are done! DH sure won't do it very long. And he really hates feet. DD made me a foot soak and it was wonderful just to soak my feet. I can't wait to try this pedicure thing!!
I went to the grocery store where I bought everything except yogurt, a key ingredient, as you might imagine.
After a trip to the store, I was back in the kitchen, working on the chicken. I grilled the chicken and then marinated it.
It took me a while to realize my mistake (namely, marinate and then grill).
Then I threw out the chicken and took a long nap.
Other recent mistakes: putting both the butter and the yogurt in the freezer rather than the fridge; paying for my groceries and then leaving the store without them; sending dd to daycare without undies.
I'm exhausted and in pain (sciatica) again. Last night dh and I had a pretty intense fight about cereal. I actually thought, what have I done, marrying a man who would begrudge me a bowl of cereal before bed.
We're going on vacation in a week or so. I would love to have my nesting done by that point. But all I can do is, say, clean the fridge, do a load of laundry and then collapse for the day. And I have a pretty long, pretty weird list of things needing doing before the baby comes (like arrange the spice rack, organize now-prehistoric wedding photos -- what these have to do with a baby, I couldn't say).
ahhh Dodo....I understand completely...
What am I doing up?
Thinking to much and craving a cream filled cream stick with chocolate icing on top .....Anyone want to talk me out of that? I don't knwo but I maybe making a trip to the grocer in the a.m. to get my fill...been craving it all week
Bears.. on the nursing issue... I am sorry your LLL group did not offer some better support. Sometimes if there are not mothers in the group who have BTDT it is hard to get a more empathetic view. JMHO. Have you tried talking to ds about nursing? What about reading...have you read Mothering Your Nursing Toddler? How Weaning Happens?
Your ds is what 2-ish? That is a looong time to nurse B. You have given him the best far longer than many. This relationship is about both of you, not just him. You have to love it too...kwim?
Here is a good article from LLL- bookmark and save for later:
talk about butting heads...I feel like that is all ds and I have been doing these past few weeks and I feel bad when I sit down and think-you know *we* only have 5 weeks left together. I have been just so exhausted lately and in pain, that my patience level is at 0. I really need to work on that. He has been screaming and yelling(something we do not do in this house) when he does not get his way or the major biggie is "I don't wanna play by myself!" this said when dh and I are still eating at the table and he has decided he is done and wants to get back to playing, but doesn't want to wait for dh or I to finish eating. Or going to the potty-he had a week where he went all by himself and now when he has to go we tell him "well go"- and he screams "Not by myself!-I don't want to wash my hands!" Ugh! What am I doing wrong?
Had lots of contractions yesterday all day long...weird....
Baby is moving lots...nighttime bathroom trips are making me crazy...and so very painful when my bladder is full....
well gtg I hear dh up now for his early am bowl of cereal..he will come down here to my typing and give me the "you're weird" look and go back to bed....
Free To Be~
"Living is learning and when kids are living fully and energetically and happily they are learning a lot, even if we don't always know what it is."
When I found out about this baby, I was *NOT* happy. Scared? Upset? Worried? All of the above. I actually lost about a dozen friends because they didn't understand how I could be so upset. I did not talk about my pregnancy except to say things like "I wonder when I will miscarry." It was a total defense mechanism. They kept saying "God has given you a blessing and you just need to be happy." Which is all fine and dandy until you've had 5 babies come out of your body dead. I was in SEVERE depression (ended up on Prozac in the first trimester, which has been ) and they saw it as a CHOICE for me to feel upset. Anyway, life is better, I've moved on from those friendships...
This, despite the initial emotions, has been a very faith-lifting experience. I've grown a lot spiritually and my relationship with God is better right now. But at the beginning, I was not feeling "blessed" I was feeling tortured. I mean, c'mon, I was looking at my past odds and saying okay, I've got a 1:5 win/loss ratio. That's not very good.
Anyway, whew, that was good to get out. Is Laurie scared of me now??? I promise I love my baby now and will even MORE when she gets to my arms.... it's just been a long process to get there
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