Originally Posted by Malama
I am doing MUCH better, thanks. After worrying a lot recently about this baby and the outcome of the birth and all, I talked to dh, had a good cry and then wrote down all my fears on a piece of paper and burned them. very therapeutic. We went to the beach that day (yesterday, actually) and it was sooooo beautiful (Richardson's). There was snow on the mountain you could see from the sand and the day was just so clear. I felt immensely better!
I don't know what I'm gonna have. I do have the 2 boys already.... Maybe I'll have my 3 sons! who knows. I'm just ready and waiting!
I know you've had 2 after birth transports. Roxanne and I were talking about it when I told her you were having another. I think you're due and easier time!!!! So no one from your big family can committ to coming and helping after the baby??? If not, you're a strong woman, and I know you'll figure out a way to cope. Maybe there's a "newer" doula in the area who could come and help with the kids??? YK, the ones who have recently trained and are looking for experience? You could teach one a thing or two about breastfeeding, for sure, lol! Good Luck MAMA!!!
That sounds like a great ritual and a lovely day
I sure miss Hawaii sometimes.
My family. Ugh. If you had been at my birth, you would have gotten an idea. LOL. All those people and no one really helping. Just a bunch of couch potatoes and fridge raiders. My brother and his family live here but they have a newborn. My brother has offered to pull his daughter out of school for a week or two to help me but she's a teenager with a computer addiction (*ahem* i'll leave my computer addiction out of this :P) and she's not very good at cleaning up messes or helping without direction. I guess I could use her as a last resort. My older sister, Kunti, says that if she comes, there's no reliable childcare for her 4 yr old son when his dad goes to work - she doesn't feel that Amrita lives in a good situation to leave him with her. If my younger sister Amrita comes, then she has to bring 2 yr old Malati who has this screeching thing and adding a loud 2 yr old to the mix would make a lot of chaos. My mom can't come and that only leaves my lil bro who would never come. Haha.
I've visualized this birth and I'm feeling really positive about it. The hospital is less than a mile away and I've talked to them and they seem really nice. I really don't see myself going there. I had a home visit from my midwife last week and we were talking about how I birth and what I need from her and she decided not to bring her partner midwife because she thought I might have a personality clash. She said her partner usually works at a birth center and is a bit overbearing at times and likes to take control of the situation. That's so totally not me! So she said she has a friend who is a doula and in midwifery training who she will bring to the birth instead. Whew!
I looked high and low for a midwife like Roxanne. A woman who is patient and sweet and wise and knowledgeable and has experience with many different types of births and a connection to the community and knowledge of local hospitals and procedures. The midwife I finally decided to use has many of the qualities I loved in Roxanne's way of doing things but she's not nearly as experienced and not nearly as comfortable with me declining various tests. Although she hasn't made a peep about me not having any internal exams. I finally told her that I would let her do a quick exam when she arrived to see if how baby was presenting and all that.
Other than that, I'm stocking my freezer like mad. I've got tamales and lasagna and pizza and butternut squash soup in there so far. I plan to make cookies and pancakes and bread too. I also need to add some barley soup and lentil soup and maybe a shepherd's pie. I cooked up a bunch of food before Nadia was born too. It really came in handy. After she was born, we just heated up a casserole and fed the crowd at my house. BTW, I always thought I was a "boy mom" and was very surprised when Nadia arrived. I was even nervous about how to wipe her during diaper changes. LOL.
When are you expecting this baby? I'm due Feb 6th, but thinking baby will arrive on Feb 10th. And if Dimitrius's dream is correct, it will be a boy with red hair named Kapila.