PP Mama...how much help are you getting? - Mothering Forums

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Old 02-19-2005, 02:32 PM - Thread Starter
 
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This is something that I think is so important- giving new Moms time to truly rest and bond with baby. I spend a decent amount of time emphasizing the importance of this in the Lamaze classes I teach.

But is it me or is it just SO HARD?!

Luckily, I'm feeling pretty good. But really...if I don't do it, it doesn't get done. I'm still doing pretty much what I usually do but it's just harder now to get it all done.

We're having family issues on my side...very hurtful, but I am doing well with ignoring that crap. We have also had some friends bring us meals and I am so greatful for that!

So how much help are you getting?
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Old 02-19-2005, 06:07 PM
 
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but thats ok lool I was single w/ the 2nd child so I am used to doing things on my own... all my family lives about an hour or so a way so not much help on this end..they do have my 2nd dd for a couple of days which has been nice...I am feeling really good and getting things done that didnt get done before Yasmeen was born...Its better now I have more energy on less sleep...I hope others are getting more help though because God knows we ALL need it
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Old 02-20-2005, 02:53 AM
 
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I'm getting plenty of help, for once! I guess it pays to have a larger, well-spaced family`
I had a frozen food shower 2 weeks before the birth, so I have a couple weeks' worth of dinners that are oven-ready, which means that my 2 oldest children can prepare them. I *do* have to tell them to do every little thing, including feeding their younger siblings (they can be whining up a storm, and the older ones will ignore them until I tell them to pay attention!), and nobody ever offers me food, even when they're fixing it for themselves......but I'm not doing any dishes or laundry, no family meal prep, and very very few toddler diapers.
My mother & MIL have been helping when they can, too - right now, they are each keeping one of the younger kids overnight, as my older 2 are both sick, and DH has to go on an overnight trip tomorrow. They work outside the home, though, so what they are able to do is limited.
All in all, though, I'm very grateful to have the family I've got. I am truly enjoying my postpartum break, which I have never had the opportunity to do before.
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Old 02-21-2005, 02:04 PM
 
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I had a lot of help the first three days because my parents were here, but they left yesterday so I don't have anyone to help now. DH is being pretty good about helping out but he doesn't really understand that I am in pain (even though I didn't tear) and that I am a little overwhelmed. Still, he's doing his best to help out and he's doing a pretty good job at it.

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Old 02-21-2005, 04:26 PM
 
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Not enough, but we are managing. Some things are just not getting done. My MIL does watch #1 durring the week, but I have to spend the time doing housework or paperwork (we run a small business ). DH is helping out some, but no one else does anything around here. MIL helped w/ the laundry the first week, but I have done everything since then myself. DH is trying but he doesn't do laundry, dishes, cooking, vaccuuming, well, any household task besides getting DD ready for bed
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Old 02-22-2005, 03:37 PM
 
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I feel like a single parent most of the time... 'nough said?

The other day I had a horrible case of Mastitis and still got no help. :

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Old 02-27-2005, 12:28 AM
 
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I'm VERY lucky this time! I think everyone is oversensitive b/c I had a terrible case of PPD after my last baby was born. I haven't had to cook at all yet. My parents have had some combination of the older kids almost everyday. Dh took extra days off of work this time. My best friend has been here almost everyday. Someone has been doing my laundry (parents, dh, friends) and I have meals lined up from our homeschool group until late March. I DO realize how lucky I am. It has made recovery so much easier.

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Old 02-27-2005, 12:47 AM
 
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Amy, I think we've both hit our "magic number" The pregnancies will likely be harder from here on out, but the postpartum will only get smoother & easier!
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Old 02-27-2005, 12:24 PM
 
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I agree! I've never felt so much support post partum before. It really is a blessing!

Amy - Blessed wife to Jesse (the best dad in the world), mother of 10 on earth plus 8 in heaven.   PROUD to be a Catholic! : winner.jpg familybed2.gifhomeschool.gif

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Old 02-27-2005, 10:23 PM
 
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Dh has been home with us, all in all he will have about 18 days off, then it all hits the fan. I am wondering how it will be trying to get out of the house, or should I just not bother for a while?
Anyway, dh has been awesome, taking care of dd, doing all the housework and cooking. All I am doing is nursing, taking care of dd2, nursing and nursing more!!

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Old 03-03-2005, 10:02 PM
 
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My dh has been wonderful, but he had to go back to work a week and a half after the birth. So now he can really only help on his days off. Other than that, the only help I am getting is from my 7 year old dd.
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Old 03-03-2005, 10:12 PM
 
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Well, I've been on my own all week. Had some good days and some bad. I'm glad tomorrow is Friday. I'm tired and a bit cranky. The baby has been wonderful. The older kids have been a little edgy but we're getting along OK. Got a couple days of schoolwork in too.

Amy - Blessed wife to Jesse (the best dad in the world), mother of 10 on earth plus 8 in heaven.   PROUD to be a Catholic! : winner.jpg familybed2.gifhomeschool.gif

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Old 03-03-2005, 10:15 PM
 
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after julia (2 months), DH did all of the cooking morning noon and night. And most of the laundry. I don't think he knows how to put stuff away though . He even took DS to school and picked him up every day for a week or so. I healed up pretty fast though and since I cannot tell a lie, it was over before I knew it!!
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Old 03-03-2005, 10:54 PM
 
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I haven't had much help lately. DH pretty much stopped helping after I complained about the way he was doing things. Now that I can navigate the stairs I'm doing laundry again and of course I'm cooking meals. DH can't really cook and even though I walked him through cooking things they still didn't turn out. I'm feeling pretty good for being 2 weeks PP but I am a little overwhelmed and resentful towards DH because he gets a full night's sleep on the couch while I'm sitting in bed with a screaming babe. I wish my parents were still here...or that I had family or close friends nearby.

I keep having mini melt downs every day and I'm scared I may end up w/ PPD

Monica - single mama to DS nono02.gifand DD blowkiss.gif

 

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Old 03-04-2005, 03:21 PM
 
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Dh stayed home from work for the first 3 weeks and did EVERYTHING. He didn't want me to get out of bed for the first two weeks and then I could hang out on the couch and watch TV or read, but absolutely no folding laundry or sneaking in to wash dishes. I thought it was overkill at the time, but now I appreciate getting the time to really heal. We're back to our regular routine now, but dh helps much of the time normally, so I'm still getting more help in my regular life than many women get in their postpartum days.

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