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Old 10-25-2010, 04:05 AM
 
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Kris.

I am way way waaaaaay behind on personals with no way to catch up. So, just know that I you all and am thinking about you all.

I feel like I'm drowning right now. Last week was pretty rough school-wise, and it's not going to get any easier from here on. In fact, it's about to get significantly worse. I just spent an hour filling out DUMB learning assessment tools that are due for my class that starts on Tuesday. Ya know, if this were our first college class ever, I could see it, but really? We're essentially seniors, and most of us have previous degrees. Do we really need to find out if we're a visual, aural, reading/writing, or kinesthetic kind of learner at this point? Especially when you've assigned us 12,000 other things to do at the same time...

On the bright side, it was a fairly good weekend. Bottomless mimosas after class yesterday then took DS to the town center for trick or treating (where he got WAY too much candy). A run this morning in some beautiful fall weather, took DS to Bug-A-Boo at the Butterfly Pavilion (not nearly as good as 2 years ago, but fun) and then carved our pumpkins.

Oh, and we are back to square one on the nanny search. I interviewed a girl I liked on Thursday and was torn between her and one of the women I interviewed last week, so I asked XH to talk to both to get a second opinion. #2 had a previous job offer, but was willing to give us a day so X could talk to both. He did a phone interview with each yesterday afternoon, and we decided on #1, so I let #2 know to take the other job and called #1 to offer her the position. Left her a voicemail. She emails XH this afternoon to tell him that she took another job! ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Sometime in the 3-4 hours between when XH interviewed her and I called to offer her the job, she takes another job that she never mentioned to either of us was a possibility?! And then the kicker is that apparently this other job wants to do a working interview, so she wrote in her email that if that job doesn't work out, she'd be happy to take our job after Nov. 5. WTH. XH replied that we won't be waiting for her. Sigh. So back to square one. I listed the job on another website, and am actually contemplating craigslist. I really don't want to go there, but I may have to. I am SO SO SO grateful for X's cousin right now.

Gaye, single mama to Tyler (5/06) and Baxter the labradoodle
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Old 10-25-2010, 10:12 AM
 
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Kris, I am sorry to hear about your loss.

JG, you are back and strong!

Geo, you rock and you know it. Way to go and congratulations.

Plady, I wish we could do a Dingo night out to see this awesome performance.

Gaye, may the best nanny win. You have my sympathies as this process appears to be tortuous right now.

Nic and HBM, you can do it! Rather than focusing on how much I had run or what was left I just thought of each run as a nice morning run. As in, I ran the marathon thinking, "I just need to finish this run and then I'll meet Wendy for lunch." Enjoy the training!

Oh my, I have been low. I thought it was all in my head, then it was my body/health, then my dh and dc began to fall apart along with my computer. Then it was fall break and everyone was here all.day.long. They are back in school, I can begin to clean my house, I have been to the gym, I got a new laptop, I am making a hair appointment, etc. I am getting a firm grip and resolve to maintain it. I can only control so much and I will never actually be caught up on anything so I need to marshall all my coping skills. (I hope I can sound so positive 12 hours from now.)

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Old 10-25-2010, 10:42 AM
 
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Mommajb - You're out the other side now mama, you can tell when you look back and marvel at the low point. Hang with us, remember there's always someone here having a good day who can pull those of us who aren't along on the wake of joy.

I wish I could have all my Dingos here for the show. I haven't been so consumed by a project since my first pregnancy I think. I'm having a good time too despite last week needing to snarl and bark at some of the kids.

Gaye - I can't believe how hard it is to find a decent nanny! ANd how much work you are juggling and still managing to fit in amazing workouts. I am humbled by your energy woman.

RM - Speaking of feeling humble I just slapped down the $ for the gymboss interval timer and I'm crawling back to bodyrock.tv for some behavioral modification.

Eks -

Lofty - How's your friend?

Nic - I remember those post long run food fests! Ahh, such a nice feeling to feel that replenishment happening kwim?

HBM - Hey, if you have to do a lot of walking in the marathon it's just savoring the experience more completely. That's what I told myself in SF anyway and it worked.

Okay, I've been up for 2 hours and had coffee so I have no more excuses not to get down and sweaty, I'm going to go for the old 100's routine of pushups, crunches, and squats. I'd better add in lunges come to think of it, Feb 5 is going to be here before I'm ready.

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Old 10-25-2010, 10:52 AM
 
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Hey Dingo Mamas,

I've been reading along but too ADD to stop and reply. Always sending out prayers to those who need it and amazed at the accomplishments both RR and non.

Dh and I ran a 10k yesterday. I have a pretty nasty sinus infection and did not realize how bad I felt until I was in the run. I never felt good which us not like me for a race. I ended up averaging 9:23 per mile which I'm fine with.

Hubby wants me to do a trail run with him in Nov. I've never done one. This run has 3 courses you can chose, the hardest course is the shortest and the easiest is no more than 7. I should probably do the easiest since I need to get my miles up for my 1/2 in Feb. Any opinions or ideas from you trail runners?
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Old 10-25-2010, 11:33 AM
 
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Kris- I'm sorry.

Mommajb- I hope things continue to look up. You sound like you are making progress!

RR- We hiked hilly trails for 2.5 hours yesterday, and I did a fair amount of running with DD and the dog. It was fun, but I could have worn a sports bra.
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Old 10-25-2010, 01:41 PM
 
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Kris - I'm sorry for your loss. It is really wonderful that you had such a close relationship with her and that you are mature enough to appreciate it! (I didnt and wasnt and now I wish I had been..)

Mommajb - what a whirlwind of demands on you. Im glad you are feeling like you caught a breath. I hope they continue to come more and more easily

Gaye - that's all I have to say on your behalf.. That stinks. Im sort of neurotically conscientious, and I have a very hard time understanding people who can be flaky seemingly without any conscience. wtf? As for craigslist, its good to scan now and then. I found a babysitter for dd2 who turned into one of my closest friends (she wanted to watch one other kid on her home a few hours a week with her son). sometimes there is gold in that dross

Plady - i too wish I could be there. You sound so dynamic and organized and passionate. Its been fun to hear your stories



Im doing wierd. I've been in the midst of what seems to be a very cliche mid-life funk. Done having kids, done moving around, a lot of "who am I and what's next?" kind of questions. How to find meaning and passion. I'm lately thinking a lot about where we live and not sure about it. Dh and I agree that if we didnt have kids we would pack tomorrow, but they are involved in things we value for them (schools, friends, teams) that we dont want to pull them out of, and yet, I frequently think "really; this is where Im going to have lived?" The problem with being on the fence is that it prevents me from feeling emotionally connected which makes me feel, duh, disconnected, and I am so so tired of feeling disconnected (seems to be my default mental state regardless). Im not depressed, because I feel completely grateful and happy with our lives, just ... wierd ... like something is missing, or something isnt right, or something ....

FM: hiking yesterday with the family and Daisy. It was compared to last week. She is doing great! I am starting to fall in love, but she's so mellow I think she might be sick How can a 6 mo. old puppy be this mellow?! Making a vet appt. for general stuff anyway ...

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Old 10-25-2010, 01:46 PM
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Kris - I'm so sorry for your loss.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mommajb View Post
Nic and HBM, you can do it! Rather than focusing on how much I had run or what was left I just thought of each run as a nice morning run. As in, I ran the marathon thinking, "I just need to finish this run and then I'll meet Wendy for lunch." Enjoy the training!
This is exactly what I did! I also made a point to not look at the schedule as a whole. I took it one week at a time until I felt like I really had my feet under me (which was by the time I got to the 2nd 20 miler!). I would also text my friend during walk breaks and the like. After I reached about the 10k mark in the actual marathon, she texted me saying, "Just a training run, now!" It helped to have that mentality.

Gaye - I am feeling your nanny stress and aggravation! I hope this just means that Mary Poppins is dusting off her hat and is going to visit you soon!

Plady - I so wish I could come and see your play! It sounds wonderful! Any chance it could be posted to Youtube?

FM - I haven't gotten to the gym much in the last few days, but I am thrilled with the amount of walking I've been getting in! I put in over 20 miles of walking last week!

Mama to: Katie, Emily , and Abby
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Old 10-25-2010, 02:18 PM
 
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mommajb ~ you sound like you're through the worst of it . Stay strong and keep pushing forward. Have you met with a therapist?

sparkle ~ I SO know exactly where you're coming from . Kids growing up, no more on the horizon , not thrilled with where we're moving to, no job at the moment, just kind of lost. I toying with the idea of going back to school.... again .

FM ~ nice, easy 3.5 miles outside after my haircut appointment this morning. I am just to be running again!

~~Kristina~~ Mama to DS(10/30/01), DD1(VBAC 3/28/04) and DD2(HBAC 5/21/06)
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Old 10-25-2010, 03:52 PM
 
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sparkle ~ I toying with the idea of going back to school.... again .
I'm always toying with that idea ... again.

I would like to teach part time, but the school district is in such bad shape that they cut all part timers and are only hiring people who already have a contract. I applied for a teaching job at the community college this summer that I didnt get, and although I wasnt totally interested in it, it sucks to not be good enough (especially when you know you are ). Bleh. So yeah, more school? Or another dog

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Old 10-25-2010, 03:54 PM
 
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Quick t-shirt update: We are just 2 shirts shy of an order! How about we keep the ordering open for a few days, maybe through the weekend, and see what rolls in. PM me if you have any questions or can't find the ordering info.

Mommajb: I'm glad you are through the worst of it and taking things incrementally. Sometimes when I feel on the verge of being overwhelmed, that view is the only thing that gets me through.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sparkletruck View Post
I frequently think "really; this is where Im going to have lived?"
You have really put into words exactly what I feel about where I live. And ever since I have been back home, I wonder, what now? Instead of just buckling down and living.

Quote:
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I am just to be running again!


No FM yesterday, but I did the Wii dancing game with my DD until we were both dripping with sweat. I even beat her a couple of times. So silly, but fun.

Today, I am just running around like a nervous chicken. Shopping, cooking, cleaning, worrying, driving up and down the highway doing my usual pick-up/drop-off schedule. I am so excited and nervous about my trip.

Melissa
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Old 10-25-2010, 04:03 PM
 
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mel, I'm in for a shirt, pm me with what you need pls. thnx!

RR: 5.4 miles in 43 minutes, felt great.

NRR: keeping getting dang headaches and I'm sick of it!

Other than that, just life.
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Old 10-25-2010, 04:24 PM
 
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Kris, I'm so sorry for your loss.

I didn't run this morning. Only slept two hours last night and I'm barely functioning today. Ugh.

Paige, mama to three girls, (10), (8) and (3)
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Old 10-25-2010, 05:52 PM - Thread Starter
 
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t shirts: just throwing this out there. I'm happy to co-sponsor someone's t shirt. Meaning I don't have 20 extra bucks, but I'll contribute $7 to the project. Anyone else? (You don't have to make your contribution public....you could pm me or Mel38). We could either send a t shirt to someone we know who is running but doesn't have $$ right now. Or our organizers will get extra shirts, or _____ insert good idea here.

Kristin -- mom of Erin (11/5/02) and Leah (9/29/05)
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Old 10-25-2010, 06:28 PM
 
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Kerc, I just pm'ed you

Melissa
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Old 10-25-2010, 06:46 PM
 
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Sparkle, that so much how I feel (even when things are good). Dh and I have actually had a conversation about not wanting our children to be from here. I think it really comes back to thinking there is more for us and therefore more for them. Usually he is better than I am about seeing the glass half full but right now neither one of is sure there is much in the glass. If there is I don't think we want a drink. As to school, he is tenured faculty in his field and talks abut going back to school. The reality is that we have had our chance and it will be our children attending school for the foreseeable future.

Mel, the check is in the mail. I can help with a shirt project, let me know what is needed.

HBM, get some sleep! It is like magic.

You don’t owe them an explanation, just a response.
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Old 10-25-2010, 07:08 PM
 
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Mommajb - pretty much exactly what you said!, even about the glass half full dh. My biggest hang up about moving is ds changing schools. You're spot on, our first priority is what is good for them, and he is doing so well now at his new school. We're wrestling too b/c dh just had this job change (that is, changes are happening at his job around schedule and pay, for the worse), while the p/t position he has (he does 2 shifts per month at another hospital) could be made full time if he expressed interest, which would mean a move to a place we might like better (of course, nothing's perfect), and so we spin our wheels. Alas, I cant bear to take ds out of school or dd1 out of the climbing gym..... and so it goes

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Old 10-25-2010, 09:23 PM
 
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Kris, . I'm so sorry for your loss.

Mommajb and Sparkletruck, I can relate on the location dislocation. There are a lot of things I like about our current area -- mainly the fact that dh has a great job and the weather is good 9 months of the year. But there are a lot of things I find really, really difficult -- like having a spiritual community and people I have more in common with. Not to mention educational choices for my kids that reflect my values. They are in a decent place and it's fine for now, but long term it's not viable for many reasons and it keeps me awake.

Anyway.

Dh has challenged me -- if I can break 2:04 in a half marathon, he's springing for a family trip to Israel. That would mean taking 13 minutes off my PR and running 9 minute miles. I am thinking this is well-nigh impossible, as the fastest mile I ever remember running was 9:15 or so and that was in a 5K and only 1 mile. It's a nice dream though.... meanwhile I"m saving money for my own trip (maybe taking a kid or three) and plugging along with marathon training. I like the week-at-a-time strategy. I can work with that, I hope.

Having some issues with dd1 and the assistant teacher in her classroom who is young, inexperienced, and somewhat abrasive . Her main educator is a gem and is trying to manage it but it seems to be decompensating rather abruptly so I am going to have to play mama bear a little I think. Sigh.

 "Now bid me run, and I will strive with things impossible." (William Shakespeare -- Julius Caesar)

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Old 10-25-2010, 10:29 PM
 
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Hi ladies!

Plady, I would love to see the show. Re: behavior modification, yeah...working on it.

sparkle, JG, and Mel, I get it. I waiver between that state and quite another sometimes, but I think I might be settling in after all.

Gaye, CHILDCARE VIBES to you!

kris, I hope the memories of your g'ma comfort you. So sorry, mama.


Dh left at 6AM today. The does are nearly dry. I think we're done milking for the season, so today at the store, I bought milk. *sniff* And yogurt. *sniff sniff* Ah, well. We can hang on for 4 months or so, right? Maybe less, if a sheep comes in that I can train to the stand.

Chickens are in the freezer, too, so chores are quite streamlined compared to a week ago. Easily a full 15 minutes less, mornings and evenings. If I hurry up a little, I could run 3 miles in the time gained each day.

My "run" today was 3mi on the tm. Embarrassingly slow, but check it off. Followed by weights and floor stuff. Work is frustrating for reasons beyond my control, but I am blessed to be working and that will be good enough for now.

OK, Day One of this 2-weeker is nearly over. The kids are in an annoying place, and I have warned them about a million times that my nerves are shredded and my patience gone. Bedtime will be early tonight.
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Old 10-26-2010, 02:12 AM
 
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Mel - thanks again, so much, for taking on the ordering!

Runningmommy - I am sorry, but I don't know if the V-neck rides high on these tees. The screenprinter does not stock them, but rather orders them when the print order comes in. There are t-shirt specs on the web page that we've linked here a few times, but I haven't checked to see if "front neck drop" is one of them. Probably not. I have my fingers crossed they fit OK for everyone!

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Old 10-26-2010, 03:41 AM
 
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I *think* I have done all the stupid, stupid assignments we have due for our very first MedSurg class tomorrow. Seriously, I don't get it. There HAVE to be far more important things for us to be spending our time on right now than doing self-assessments of our learning style, right? And when we all have quite a bit of college experience, and most of us already have degrees. I really hope it's not going to be like this the whole block, or I may lose it.

Nanny situation: TONS of applicants on the new website. And I'm finding some nifty features of it that seem to make the extra $$$ worthwhile (background checks included where they were extra on the other site, and this super cool thing where they interview the applicants' references and post a recording of it on the site!!!). I have a favorite that I'm going to interview on Thursday and another one probably on Wednesday. May offer a couple more interviews, too. The favorite is 62, lives with her daughter, used to be an RN in the 70's, but then worked for nearly 20 years in special education. Just lost her position as nanny to twins because they decided to put them in daycare (slots unexpectedly opened up, I guess). She sounds great, but we've seen how those have gone thus far. The other one sounds good, except that I'm worried she may leave next school year if she finds a job (she's a new elementary ed grad who hasn't been able to get a teaching job). Bunches of others to look over, though, so .

Took the dog out for a quick 4 while DS was in school this afternoon. I was going to take DS in the stroller this morning but we've had crazy wind all day and it was raining in the morning, so I decided to wait. At least there wasn't rain, but it was still crazy windy! I think the dog loves me again...for months he's been sleeping in the bedroom while I sit on the couch doing homework, but tonight after running two days in a row and getting a lot of extra play time the past two days, he's been snuggled up next to me on the couch. and

Time for bed...scary class begins at 0800 tomorrow! Here we go, I guess...

Gaye, single mama to Tyler (5/06) and Baxter the labradoodle
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Old 10-26-2010, 09:15 AM
 
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Reading along... my RR is that I did my 7 mile LR last night. Somehow getting past 6 miles is a mental hurdle, so I was kind of stressing about the run beforehand, but it all went OK. I still have GI issues though. My dream run or race would be one that had portapotties every .25 mile. I have learned that most people won't refuse a red-faced, dripping with sweat woman who is asking to use the restroom. (ETA: I mean at a public place like a restaurant... I haven't sunk to the level of showing up on the doorstep of a stanger's home... yet.)

The non RR is that I am going back with C to his counselor at 10:00. Please send good vibes if you have a few to spare. The kind of mood I've been in lately, if the counselor starts getting nasty with me, I'm either going to mouth off, walk out, or burst into tears, but I don't think I'll be able to sit there and take it like a good girl. This may be a good thing, yet I'm not crazy about confrontation. I have a lot of questions... and that didn't go so well last time, so we'll see.

Gotta go... sorry for no personals...

Katherine, mama to Emma Kate (7) and Griffin (3)

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Old 10-26-2010, 09:20 AM
 
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Katherine.

Can't give up actin' tough, it's all that I'm made of. Can't scrape together quite enough to ride the bus to the outskirts of the fact that I need love. ~ Neko Case

 
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Old 10-26-2010, 10:07 AM
 
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for strength and fortitude at your session with C, eks .

~~Kristina~~ Mama to DS(10/30/01), DD1(VBAC 3/28/04) and DD2(HBAC 5/21/06)
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Old 10-26-2010, 10:13 AM
 
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Katherine, my thoughts are with you all day today. Use the strength that comes from the gang of dingos today. and

FMR: a hot? and very windy five miles at 5AM. How does that work in the last week of October? It was 75F. Some years (well, in 1993) we had snow this week in Southern IN.

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Old 10-26-2010, 10:46 AM
 
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FMR: a hot? and very windy five miles at 5AM. How does that work in the last week of October? It was 75F. Some years (well, in 1993) we had snow this week in Southern IN.
It's really wierd out, isn't it? I just hope we actually get some rain out of all the crazy weather headed this way. Off to the Y for Power Pump!

~~Kristina~~ Mama to DS(10/30/01), DD1(VBAC 3/28/04) and DD2(HBAC 5/21/06)
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Old 10-26-2010, 11:27 AM
 
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Eks - I say err on the side of getting mouthy, you know the old slogan Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History. and a pack of Dingos at your back.

So I did do my 100's yesterday. It was kind of awful to see how much harder push-ups were after taking 4 months mostly off. But that's what I get right? Anyway, today I'm geared up to run, tomorrow more 100's rinse repeat....

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Old 10-26-2010, 12:03 PM
 
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Originally Posted by JayGee View Post
It's really wierd out, isn't it? I just hope we actually get some rain out of all the crazy weather headed this way. Off to the Y for Power Pump!
Ugh. Tried to drive to the Y, but the tornado sirens went off and I couldn't see more than 2 ft. in front of my car. The wind was blowing me all over the road, so I turned around and came home . Guess I'll just do some weights here. But first, a new pot o' coffee !

~~Kristina~~ Mama to DS(10/30/01), DD1(VBAC 3/28/04) and DD2(HBAC 5/21/06)
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Old 10-26-2010, 12:21 PM
 
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Katherine.

Plady, I love that quote. I might have to use it.

A somewhat painful 4.2 miles this morning, 10 min. pace. The first lap was working out the kinks of Sunday's 14 miler but the more painful part was my blisters, which are starting to peel. Icky.

 "Now bid me run, and I will strive with things impossible." (William Shakespeare -- Julius Caesar)

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Old 10-26-2010, 12:44 PM
 
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Katherine, I'm thinking of you. I hope you get your questions answered and hold up under the stress of it. Besides, if that counselor isn't able to answer your questions, it's not fair to make you feel bad for asking them. Stay strong!

Yeah, hot here too. It is so muggy, I could scream. My house is mildewing. Literally. This front is supposed to blow through by Thursday. By then, I'll be in cool Denver, though, and I am so looking forward to the dry air!! Yay!

Better get packing.

Melissa
mom to 3 lovely kids
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Old 10-26-2010, 01:57 PM
 
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Quick post to say thanks for the good vibes. They worked - the session went well. I think we are taking some steps out of this miserable angry place we're stuck in towards trying to make things better. There still may be things I can't live with - I'm making no promises - but it's the right thing to give it a try and see what happens. I think what we established today is that I should take a more proactive role in organizing, reminding, and scheduling Chris. OK. I like to do that (Staples here I come), I can do it easily, and if it will up his success rate I'm all for it. I guess it's not enabling if he truly can't do the things he's not doing, right? Man, the journey has been a really interesting one.

A kind of funny thing, either the counselor is so used to praising his clients for the slightest glimmer of good communication, or I just really am that good ... but he seemed all excited about how well I express my feelings and kept commenting on that. And honestly, it was nice for me to be able to ask questions about C's behavior and get an actual answer rather than the long silences I usually get if I ask C. The counselor was much more supportive of me today compared to last time, and kept emphasizing that it was reasonable and understandable for me to feel the way I do. I'm glad it went well, because he is really the only person who can give me the answers I need right now - so I need him to not be a jerk!

Katherine, mama to Emma Kate (7) and Griffin (3)

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