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Old 04-21-2012, 09:47 PM
 
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mommajb~Ugh on the ILs. I feel extraordinarily lucky that, even after a divorce, I think my ILs kinda rock. Hearing all the stories from others makes me feel even luckier. I'm glad they're gone, and hopefully you celebrated their departure in style. orngbiggrin.gif

plady~Don't get me wrong, I hope I'm still going that strong at 75...I just wish he would acknowledge that the rest of us aren't 75! I was actually shocked that we did quite a bit of out of the saddle climbing, and even some jumps...he's usually a strictly in the saddle kinda guy. winky.gif

melw~Hope your DD is on the upswing. That's got to be so rough, I can't imagine. Did you ever figure out the culprit?


I have just spent two hours attempting to assemble all the documents necessary to refinance one's house. I'm not completely confident that I found them all, but hopefully. The process was not assisted by the fact that my office is out of control, a complete disaster area. Blech. Fun times. I also got in a nice little nap this afternoon, and a quick trip to Costco. FYI, they have some great wicking racerback tanks in right now in awesome springy colors for $12.99. I wasn't completely sold, but then I wore one for my run this morning and LOVED it. They're really long, which is awesome for a very long-torsoed person such as myself. So I went back to buy two more colors. bag.gif

NYC is booked! joy.gif Hotel and flights are confirmed, woohoo! For the grand total of $7.50, thank you hotel points and airline miles! orngbiggrin.gif Of course, I went to see if I could get tickets for the Book of Mormon for that weekend. I can...for $250. A TICKET. yikes.gif Not sure if I can justify that. Although, since I'm not paying for hotel or flights, maybe. Especially if my friend comes with me (and she's about 75% sure she is)...she could pay for the tickets in return for the hotel, I'm thinking. Broadway/musically inclined dingos...any other good shows on Broadway now that would be worth getting tickets for? I can't go to NYC and not see a show!

rr~Well, I didn't get my planned 8 in, but I did get a pretty rocking 6+ in. Hint: it's very helpful to actually take your running shoes with you when you drive to a run. rolleyes.gif I arrived at 8:30 to get 4-ish in before the group met at 9:30, only to arrive at the park and find out that I didn't have my shoes. So I got 2 in before the group. Oh well. I actually had someone to run with this week, first time with this group! It was great...he was pretty good company, and clearly faster than me, but taking it easy today so that he pushed me just a little. I had my fastest run in MONTHS, even got two miles sub-10 min pace. It's reassuring that I do have SOME kind of speed hiding somewhere. It gives me hope that maybe, just maybe, it will come back a little. Still not so sure about that 10 mile race next weekend, but I already paid, so I guess I have to at least try, right?

Gaye, single mama to Tyler (5/06) and Baxter the labradoodle
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Old 04-21-2012, 10:17 PM
 
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bec-- candle.gif What a nice memorial.
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I need to make some running friends who don't ditch me...
*I* wouldn't ditch you. I just run at inconvenient times due to children's schedules (or lack thereof) and that small hassle of not living close enough to make it easy. I have 13 planned for tomorrow afternoon if you want to join me (or if we want to meet vaguely central, like Clear Creek). orngbiggrin.gif

mommajb--ugh. Hope you're able to get some R&R before your parents arrive (or that that visit will provide some positive support).
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I don't know if it's been better, yesterday definitely was...but I think I'm working really hard on identifying what I will and won't tolerate in others.  It is leaving me lonely, but I won't settle as lonely. If that makes sense.  I'm not sure if I'm high maintenance, difficult, or if I have unrealisticly high expectations of others, or I'm just the freaky kid who wets herself wink1.gif.  But I think I have to get more comfortable with the sense that if others don't want to be around me, mis-perceive me, there's nothing that horribly wrong with me.  I'm working on it.  If I can find that sense of peace, I truly believe everything else will settle into place.  It's almost like you have to embrace the loneliness in order for it to dissipate.  That and find people with similar values? I dunno.   

There is some peace in being ok with who you are and not caring about who likes you. And it's lonely too. Are you sure that it's people really not liking you and not that perhaps you're being too sensitive to it? I've wondered that about myself a lot, especially in situations where I might try to join a circle of people talking and no one invites me into the conversation, but then someone else wanders up and everyone interrupts the conversation to say "hi Carol" or whatever. Though I'm not sure that means they *don't* like me, either, 'cause it's not like they moved away or something. And for that matter, I'm really short so maybe people really didn't see me. (My saving grace these days is that I'm too busy to hang out and talk. I haven't even made it to my AP play group in months, and I do like those women.) I hope you can find the sense of peace and figure out where to aim your friendship energies.

kerc--good luck with the car.
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Hey!  Careful dissing the 70+ set, it'll feel like the blink of an eye before we're all there!  Hopefully still moving it.

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sparkle--on schools, I really think that unless someone is really unhappy, it doesn't make that much of a difference when there's interesting stuff to do at home. On the one hand, I get that our generation is expected to stress about every. last. thing that affects our children as if every one of them is some kind of do-or-die decision. I also resent the notion that a child's environment is the be-all-end-all of their educational existence, not to mention the fact that that kind of dialogue has reached the university environment. Learning is a two-way street. Good teachers, schools, resources, etc make a difference, but a kid who is interested in learning will also find ways to learn and excel. Kids who love to read and don't have many books at home will find ways to use the school and public library, books in the classroom, books in used stores, whatever. Kids who are looking for any excuse to not bother learning will seize on any excuse (the teacher was mean...class is boring...). As parents, I feel like we can help our children understand that in the end, they need to be responsible for what they learn, and the skills they use to do that will be ones they'll use later in the workforce--like approaching a supervisor to request additional resources (tech or otherwise), for example.

The other thing that I'd point out (very cynically, I might add), is that there's been an increased media focus on schools and education during the past decade, and not in a good way either. Yes, there are schools that need serious help, there are problems with teachers (as with employees in ANY field), and whatnot, but I suspect that much of the push is backed by people who want to destroy teachers unions and defund public education to the greatest extent possible. The easiest way to do that is to destroy people's faith in public schools so that they become less willing to pay taxes to support them (or to vote in favor of mill levies and such)--and they've been highly successful. I don't think there's any coincidence that there's a sudden interest in rising tuition levels and co-currently, a sudden interest in "accountability" from colleges and faculty for what college students learn (as if college faculty can call a student's mommy and tell them that little 22-year-old Johnny isn't coming to class and is failing the tests). It's made us all a little more paranoid than is strictly necessary.

Get her tested and don't be embarrassed about it. If she tests in, so to speak, it's because she qualifies to be there and yes, is gifted (also, I am one of "those" parents, whatever that means, as the parent of a kid in a G&T classroom. Should I be embarrassed? I think not. See my advice to mommajb). R is thriving and being adequately challenged, which probably wouldn't be the case as much given last year's kindergarten experience (ALP after G&T testing which wasn't able to be fully carried out due to time constraints--namely, keeping some semblance of order in an overcrowded classroom with several disruptive kids).

And if the right choice means she's back at the private school and you have two kids at two schools and everyone is happy, go with it. There will be different issues to deal with no matter where they are.

I wish it could be easier. And that we didn't have 24/7 media coverage to make us agonize over every decision from car seats to the veggies we feed our kids (or beg them to eat) and everything in between. Craziness.

RR: 4.1 pushing the double jogger. That thing doesn't get easier.

NRR: glad DH is back from his business trip tonight, though wishing that J would go to sleep already given that it's 10:15 pm. The kids were ... I don't even have a word for it, yesterday. There was the point where J decided to spit out the chocolate mint she was eating for desert onto my chair, while wearing her sister's Crocs and (simultaneously?) peeing on the floor (and her sister's Crocs. Which she proceeded to walk around in afterward, making me wonder why I kept hearing the sound of wet shoes on the hardwood. Oh....). Or the point where my 7yo pooped her pants at the park--a park equipped *with* a portapotty? (True story. She made a run for the portapotty, only to arrive at the back end of it and scream, panicked, "I can't get the door open." Well, that's because there isn't a door on that side, see.... Did I mention she's in the G&T class? Indeed, just like that Far Side cartoon.) And J kicked off her shoe before we got to the playground but failed to mention it, so we had to run back and find the shoe. There's more, but suffice it to say it was a day--enough so that I fell asleep with J (at 10), woke up at 10:30 long enough to answer the phone, tell DH I was too tired to talk, and then fell asleep on the couch 'til 2:15 am. Today was better, but I can't wait until my (quiet, peaceful, child-free) run tomorrow.

ETA: Mel38--could you put me down for the Bolder Boulder on May 28? Thanks!

Lisa  caffix.gif and her wonderful girls: R (9) violin.gif &  J (3-3/4) coolshine.gif 
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Old 04-22-2012, 05:49 AM
 
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Okay, so I'm trying desperately to post and my obese cat is rubbing his face all over mine and marching back and forth in front of the screen.  Dude, I can't see through your 18 pound body....

 

Real ~ some wise, wise words you've written about schooling above.  Kids who want to learn DO find a way to learn, regardless.  I'm discovering this with DS at the moment, who, while totally unchallenged at school, has devoted the majority of his time at home to researching  various car related subjects and doing experiments.  Thank you for the reminder smile.gif.

 

mommajb ~ oy!  Sounds like quite the visit.  I'm glad your DH is on your side, even if he's not particularly vocal about it.  My parents arrive in one month for a 2 weeks visit, and I know my Mom will have plenty to say, do, correct, comment on as well eyesroll.gif.

 

sparkle ~ hug2.gif stressful, I know.  I'd get your DD tested.  Make the best use of the resources available.  I would.

 

kerc ~ good luck with the car issues

 

Shanti ~ thinking of you hug2.gif

 

bec ~ great job on the bronze event!  And congrats you Abby on her first 5K.  I love the way your family dedicated their run to Grommit.

 

RR ~ still in a slump.  Need a kick in the fanny.

 

NRR ~ Yesterday morning was the Read and Run Marathon at school (over the last 4 months the kids have read 26 books and run 25 miles on their own.  A mile of running can be a sports practice or biking or whatever, as long as it's active.  Then, they run their last mile of the "marathon" together as a school.  Both DDs ran yesterday (DS had a soccer game, much to his dismay) and I ran with the kindergarteners.  The girls did really well, although DD2 walked a good bit.  One of the kindergarteners lay down in the middle of the street after the first hill and had a mega tantrum.  Luckily, her Mom was running with the first graders and could "inspire" her to move forward. 

 

DH and I are both in money-stress mode.  The lawnmower AND the blower (which is new) both died yesterday.  I am spending an insane amount on groceries and need help getting the cost of food down (suggestions?!!!) Kids activities are bleeding us dry.  I think it's time to write out a real budget and stick with it. 


~~Kristina~~ Mama to DS(10/30/01), DD1(VBAC 3/28/04) and DD2(HBAC 5/21/06)
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Old 04-22-2012, 07:19 AM
 
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Real - bow.gif Thank you for the taking the time to write that, especially amongst all that you have going on goodvibes.gif That was a DAY alright. I completely agree, across the board, and what I meant by being one of *those* parents, is one of those whose child probably doesnt technically qualify (in the special ed., NEEDS modifications sense, maybe there are concomitant social or behavior issues) but who will gladly take advantage of the service to challenge my bright kid. I just think, in some cases, GT is the go-to resource for affluent and/or bright/highly educated parents to get the education they dont see happening in mainstream classes, and that this is not really what the resource is designed for, but is now I guess. And I also agree that I succumb to the micro-manager in me sometimes, or at least, the micro-manager wins the day in my psyche sometimes. It's absolutely true that she will do well whereever, and that she seeks out more from us (she does math before bed from a workbook she asked us to get, if she's not reading), I think I just project: she is SO like me, in so many ways, and I think about what I would have liked for myself, and bla bla bla. Of course I "turned out fine". My ultimate goal, really, is to see her turned on, and I know that one thing that turns her on is to be surrounded by other turned on kids (true for all of us), and if she's always the brightest and the one coming up with lessons for the rest of her class, well, I'd like her to have someone to catch up to as well. But again, maybe it's all due to her being theoldest in the third level of the multi-age class, and next year there will be a class above her (4/5... she'll be 4th grade). Sigh. Thanks for talking me down .... for the day winky.gif

Mamajb - I am so very sorry for that. Are your parents a counter-point, or will it be more of the same goodvibes.gif

JG - I'm in the funk with you, and the money hemmorage. Bleh. Here is to a better week. As for groceries, I have started making more meat free dinners, adding more beans to the repertoire. I try to do this at least 3 days a week (dont laugh vegetarians!). We also have a staple called "beans and corn" which is onion, frozen corn, pinto beans, and canned tuna, and then we make fish tacos out of it (also good in frittata the next morning for b'fast. It's "meat" but a can of tuna is pretty inexpensive considering. Or I do meat but with beans, like lentils and sausage, so there is a a little bit of sausage with lentils (although all the red wine I use in the lentils could be expensive - you need "2 buck chuck" from T'Joes lol.gif )....

RR: yeah, right

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Old 04-22-2012, 12:07 PM
 
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Visiting on the off-chance that tjsmama was dying to for an afternoon run with me biglaugh.gif. So while she's out finishing up her run, and I'm stuck nursing J....
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I just think, in some cases, GT is the go-to resource for affluent and/or bright/highly educated parents to get the education they dont see happening in mainstream classes, and that this is not really what the resource is designed for, but is now I guess.
I guess I'm curious as to what a true need would look like. There is a certain amount of self-selection, but with a strong genetic basis. G&T kids generally come across as bright, and some of them go on to be highly educated and/or making a decent amount of money. And then have kids with the same kids of intelligence and educational needs. Obviously, there's a segment of G&T kids who act out in class and come with what DH and I refer to as "bonus traits" (credit given to the Spirited Child book), but behavioral issues differ regardless of educational needs.

Or it may be that it's easier to accept that I--as the daughter of a diesel mechanic and a receptionist, with grandparents who hadn't gone to high school on my mother's side--was in the gifted program as a kid in a rural school than it is to accept that my kid, as the daughter of two parents with PhDs and faculty jobs (though lacking the affluence of some of our less-educated peers), is in the program in a suburban school?

There's certainly the danger that that population is over-served, in part because the parents are more aware of resources, but I fear we run the danger of stigmatizing our future doctors and engineers and scientists because there's the notion that G&T isn't real anymore and that it's just for an elite population. (And personally, I'm annoyed by the stigma because our combined faculty salary doesn't equal six figures, we're driving 11 and 16-year-old cars, living in a house worth less than the median in our area, and yet there's always going to be a suggestion that R (and presumably in a few years, J) is in the program because we have PhDs and not say, because she is the genetic beneficiary of both some intelligence, and also also, an anxiety disorder, asthma, allergies, and the gift of being extraordinarily short. Thankfully J has skipped the anxiety disorder).

I get the concern that some kids don't really belong there--I really do--but our society needs to find a way to stop fussing over different educational needs. IEPs have a role. G&T ed has a role. Alternative educational approaches have a role, and it's all good. (Disclaimer 1: as a kid who wished more than anything I could be normal and not smart so people wouldn't make fun of me, and at the same time spending most of high school and college and my master's degree and my PhD program wondering if maybe I really wasn't smart enough to be there, that clearly all these people were much better and smarter and I really shouldn't be taking up a slot, some of that trauma undoubtedly plays into my reaction now.

Get her tested. If she tests in, it's because she qualifies and it's a wonderful opportunity for her.

Lisa  caffix.gif and her wonderful girls: R (9) violin.gif &  J (3-3/4) coolshine.gif 
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Old 04-22-2012, 12:27 PM
 
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I was planning a long walk this afternoon but am going to spend it with ds instead. He is focussed on finding some aspect of epilepsy to study to try to get to the national science fair again next year. What an incredible kid. He went last year and wanted to this year but his (at that time) undiagnosed seizures were making him too tired and making it too hard for him to focus to do the work. He has spent the day reading researching and asking questions, trying to find that one question he can zero in on and work on through the year. So cool that he wants to make a difference, so amazing that this is where his diagnosis is taking him. I hope for his sake that he can do it. As for spending the afternoon with him, he just informed me that his history teacher said they will spend 2 and only maybe 3 weeks studying WWII. Seriously??? When I was in grade 10 that was the main focus of the course! We studied WW1 and the 20's and 30's but the main body of the course was WWII. We spent minimal time on post war stuff because our teacher knew this was the one time most of the students would get to learn about this part of history. So instead of a walk along the shore this afternoon, ds and I are going to watch Schindler's List together. He already knows a fair bit about the war but I cannot fathom trying to teach this piece of history in a couple of weeks. I am especially irked with the incident that happened to ds online a few weeks ago. I have a DVD made by Eva Olesson, a Holocaust survivor from our area, that he and I will watch together next weekend. If his teacher can't/won't allow the kind of time this deserves, we will just do some homeschooling. ds wants it and as far as I am concerned, outlines, dates, some facts just aren't enough when it comes to history. They just spent a month on the 1920's. Aagh - I would teach this course so very differently. 

 

I have a feeling ds and I will need to go for a walk together tonight after watching this so I will exercise today but more importantly connect with my boy who isn't going to be a boy much longer.

 

dh has a packed schedule for the next 3 weeks and then is away for a week. Times like this always help me streamline everything around here. I am actually feeling pretty good about the way the next month looks. Now if it would just warm up again so I could keep the windows open!

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Old 04-22-2012, 12:47 PM
 
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It's 2:30 pm, and all of my children are sleeping. headscratch.gif Well, it's been a busy few days, so I know that they were tired, and we enforced a nap for DS. DD2 went to read a book and conked out, and I think DD1 is not feeling well. Still, it's eerily quiet in the house.

 

Just popping in with my RR from yesterday's sprint tri:

 

Woke up early for an egg, banana and coffee breakfast with DH. We had dropped our bikes off the afternoon before, so we assembled the rest of our gear and drove to T2 to set up there and then catch shuttle over to T1. This business of two transition areas is very nerve-wracking! I was convinced that I was forgetting something really obvious... it was just nerves. We watched the half iron distance athletes get started with their swim, and I chatted a bit to the ladies in my wave. The weather was cool and overcast most of the time, only getting sunny and warmer for the run.

For the swim, probably 75 percent of the athletes wore wetsuits. Water temps were between 76 and 77, and the it really felt fine to me. The swim started out well. I didn't wait for the rush to subside, but started a little to the left of the pack and went for it. I was grabbed/bumped a few times, but nothing bothersome. For the most part, I felt great and like I was holding a good pace. After rounding the first buoy, I guess I slowed down considerably, although I didn't feel it so much as notice it in that I was no longer with the pack. On the final leg, I was being passed by the next wave and starting to have a sinking feeling about the swim, even though I felt good physically. I was just not keeping a decent pace. Also, I definitely had some navigating "issues" on that third leg. Finally finished up (next to a breast-stroking person from the wave behind me irked.gif).

 

Nice bike ride. I passed many who had beaten me on the swim, but in retrospect, should have been more assertive about passing more. I hesitated, sometimes settling in when I should have been moving on. Condition-wise, I felt fine, not tired. I should have been drinking more during the ride - this is hard for me, as I don't like to fiddle around with the bottles while riding. I need to work on that.

 

The second transition was a complete fail! I couldn't find my rack (my fault!) and when I did find it, someone had racked all over my towel, my shoes were tossed and no room for my bike. I admit, I didn't have a plan B. Thankfully, a volunteer helped me find a spot for my bike, so I gathered my shoes and changed, standing on the asphalt instead of my towel since it was trapped under that other bike. That sucked, had gravel bits in my shoes for the run. But this is something that happens and I need to figure out a way to maintain composure and focus even when things don't go as planned. Next time.

 

But the run! Wow, this was my best 5k time ever! I am certain that it was a bit short (and have heard from one other person who measured it at just a hair under 3 miles). Seriously, this would be a +2 min. PR for me on the 5k. So, all in all, it was awesome. I felt good, I got my pace up in mile 2, held it in mile 3 and pushed at the end until I felt like throwing up right after. Perfect race for me! lol.gif And even if it was a tad short, it's still a PR.

 

After the race, I met up with DH and we had pictures made, talked to some people and cleaned up our gear. We were contemplating heading right back home, but I wanted to go back and check if results were in. I was pretty happy with my overall time (1:30:38) which is pretty much exactly what I got last year at the sprints I did. Happily, that was enough for a 3rd place in my AG! We all got nice finisher medals and the AG awards were big white towels embroidered with the race name and year. A fun day!

 

Now I had better get busy cleaning bathrooms, as we have company coming over in an hour. yikes2.gif
 


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Old 04-22-2012, 01:00 PM
 
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Shanti, I x-posted with you - what a great idea you have to handle the subject at home when you feel that it isn't being adequately addressed in school. Especially in history, it really pays to talk to your kids a lot, I feel. Just to be able to understand that things are never as clear as they are portrayed in the textbooks, and how our own cultures and experiences color our understanding of history, will help them to apply critical thinking to world events.

 

Probably most recently when DD was taking a homeschool group class on South Carolina history, and there were several class discussions on what a bad president Lincoln was and how he had permanently damaged the country and specifically the south. Well, I guess that's what I get for putting her in a class full of conservative South Carolinians. lol.gif This was just a mentality and an interpretation of history that I had never confronted before. It definitely lead to some interesting conversations at home, too.
 

 


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Old 04-22-2012, 07:36 PM
 
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Visiting on the off-chance that tjsmama was dying to for an afternoon run with me biglaugh.gif. So while she's out finishing up her run, and I'm stuck nursing J.....

lol.gif Sorry, Lisa...I was off riding my bike instead today. orngbiggrin.gif

mel38~clap.gif Nicely done! And no, you shouldn't have to have a plan B for transition. That was NOT cool of that person. In fact, downright unacceptable. In all my tris (and, as you know, there have been many), that has never happened to me...the worst that I've ever had is someone hanging their wetsuit over the rack in my spot. I had a short 5k like that once. They marked the turnaround too soon, and according to my results, I ran 7:30 pace for that 5k. biglaugh.gif

Back to work tomorrow, and I am so not ready. I love having four days off, but it almost makes it that much more painful going back to work! Last week on days for the foreseeable future, though.

rr~Well, contrary to plans, no run for me. I was planning on riding, but thought I would get up early and get 4-ish miles in before. Instead, I was up half the night in the bathroom. greensad.gif So, when the alarm went off to go run, it was just not going to happen. Especially because I was not convinced that running was going to be a good idea if I desperately needed a bathroom. I sucked it up and headed out for the ride, though, and it was good. It was a beautiful day, and I got about 37 miles in. I wish I would have had more time, since the group kept going and did the Lookout Mountain climb, but I needed to get home to my kiddo. Oh well. It was a good workout!

Gaye, single mama to Tyler (5/06) and Baxter the labradoodle
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Old 04-22-2012, 08:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Lisa, I really appreciate your post about education. It rings true for me on so many counts. And congrats on suriviving (and still running!) despite a crazy, crazy day.

 

Mel, congrats on the PR and the tri success overall!

 

Shanti, enriching at home can be so enriching. I hope the WWII studies go well.

 

RR- (kinda, sorta) My youngest was well enough to go for a short bike ride today, with me jogging alongside. Not a run, but at least a bit of forward motion.

 

NRR- We did two days of twice daily visits to the walk-in clinic for nebulizers, and seem to have the cold/asthma under control. This afternoon was sunny and she was breathing well enough to bike and play at the park, which I let her do in a short-sleeved shirt. And have now confirmed that the sun is a factor/trigger in the allergic reactions. This rash is not nearly as bad as the original one, so hopefully will heal in less than two weeks.... In the meantime I'm online ordering a bunch of UV clothes for the summer, and investigating sunscreens for once her skin is intact again (any suggestions?).
 


"Guess what? It's a magical world. And when I sing, my songs are in it."
Madly in love with my 7 and 4 year old daughters

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Old 04-22-2012, 09:11 PM
 
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MelW - http://breakingnews.ewg.org/2011sunscreen/best-sunscreens/best-beach-sport-sunscreens/ This is a resource for sunscreens. Every year, they rate them based on effectiveness matched with environmental/body toxicity friendliness. The page I linked is for "beach" I think, but on the right there is a drop down of "sunscreen type" and you can pick other types, like moisturizer (for day-to-day) and so on. There is also a description of what their qualifications are... somewhere on the site...

Real - I am certainly having her tested and if she qualifies, great. But my understanding of gifted, from being a teacher and getting teacher training on how to teach GT kids, as well as talking to friends who are GT teachers is that GT often, though not always, involves concomitant social or behavioral challenges, such that the child has such a unique or off the chart intellect that they dont function well in a mainstream classroom. I think of Geo's kids as great examples, where her son has obvious gifts, but also challenges in other areas. Often, when kids are gifted, they are, er, un-gifted in other ways, so helping them navigate learning with a superior intellect but maybe deficiencies as well is part of a GT program.

However, this is obviously not the majority. I think there are levels of giftedness, and in the case of my city, some elementary schools offer full day gifted for those who qualify, and others offer pull-out gifted for those who arent as gifted, for lack of a better description. Yes, I agree that giftedness is genetic, or intellect anyway, and Dh and I were both in GT when we were kids, however, we also know that kids who are read to from a young age have higher IQ's, as do kids of runners (by as much as 5 points), as well as kids who are tested in May vs. August, and kids who are asked open-ended questions, and so on, and the parents who are more likely to do these things for their kids have higher education levels than those who dont. I only mention the affluence part b/c more affluent parents can offer their kids more enrichment at younger ages. And I hear you on the stigma, I agree, based on my own comments that there is suspicion of GT students or programs. But I also know that there is a back-log of years in our district for getting kids through the testing process b/c so many parents request testing. So I dont know. I guess in general parents are more involved than they were when I was a kid when they seemed to trust teachers more, so they dissect their kids' learning experience to a fault.

I ran into a mom today whose DD was in pre-school with DD1. Her eldest DD was in full gifted, then in whatever gifted classes were available at the junior high, and is now at one of the main high schools in the city. Her mom was so lassaiz-faire (sp?!) about the whole thing. She had some insight into testing, but just wasnt worrying about sending both her kids through all public schools and just rolling with whatever comes. It made me feel dumb, and more relaxed.

NRR: We cleaned and staged rooms today for pictures for the MLS. Hope to have it done by tomorrow and have the house listed by Tues. Maybe you all will be able to see it online lol.gif

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Old 04-22-2012, 09:26 PM
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My friend called me into work today.  I love that she thought of me, and my need to keep busy.  I started the day with a 1000 yard swim, followed by a double spin class.  2.5 hours of exercise and 7+ hours of work (2 hours being deep cleaning of the store) makes me a tired girl. 


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Old 04-22-2012, 10:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for the EWG link, sparkle. I'd forgotten about them. As far as I can tell from google, Badger is the only company that is guaranteeing corn-free sunscreen, starting as of next month. And they get good reviews, too. I've used various sunscreens without worry of corn via skin exposure on her in the past, but at the moment I think I need to be extra cautious. How did parenting ever happen before google was invented? My MIL fumbled through three allergic kids using trial and error and is always amazed by what I can come up with via google.

 

Speaking of Geo, where is she? As I searched the allergy thread for corn-free suncreen resources, there was an old post from her about her DS's sun allergy. Come on out and chime in about the sunshine and GT education and um.... what's that other thing we do around here? Oh yeah, running lol.gif

 

 


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Old 04-22-2012, 11:04 PM
 
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Shanti--hope it warms up where you are.

Mel38--nice tri! i don't understand what the person who racked on your towel was thinking though. At least you got a PR out of it.

tjsmama--yay for such a nice ride. I saw a lot of people out on bikes today.
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there were several class discussions on what a bad president Lincoln was and how he had permanently damaged the country and specifically the south. Well, I guess that's what I get for putting her in a class full of conservative South Carolinians.

As someone hailing from the Land of Lincoln, I'm jaw.gif. Just wow. I don't idolize him, but permanently damaged the country? Egads.
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GT often, though not always, involves concomitant social or behavioral challenges, such that the child has such a unique or off the chart intellect that they dont function well in a mainstream classroom.
DH and I had a lot of conversations about that because I really see the social and behavioral stuff as "bonus traits" rather than uniquely connected to intellect. I don't buy my husband's "absent-minded professor" stuff nor the idea that my kid has an anxiety disorder because she's smart. She has an anxiety disorder because her grandmothers and father do. My husband is absent-minded because he was raised in an environment that constantly told him he was too smart to be bothered with things like remembering to put stuff back where he found it. (My mother didn't buy into that notion, which is probably the reason I do the bills/laundry/groceries/errands while my husband forgets, decides it's not his priority, whatever. And obviously, there are gender issues involved but that's neither here nor there.)

Obviously, the G&T teachers have to deal with a lot of that (and it is a lot), but it seems like those issues are more a part of classroom management for that population--the same as it would be for kids with IEPs in certain areas--and for that matter, for the G&T kids who have ALPs and IEPs). The main benefit is being taught by teachers who focus on differentiation, advanced curricula and who also understand that a 6yo may understand academics at a really advanced level but not so much get that throwing a fit in the classroom when the teacher asks them to do something is completely normal. (Having dealt with one of the, um, "strong personalities" in R's class who was arguing with me over what I was doing with the kids at my table last month, that's really important because I think the average person (myself included) has trouble reconciling a really bright kid who doesn't "get" that even if one thinks an adult is wrong, going head-to-head with them isn't the wisest solution. Those are the classrooms where the kids who are really advanced in one or more areas and don't get the "don't mess with the teacher" bit are treated rudely or put in their place or whatnot.)

I understand what you're saying about the parent piece, but again, the higher one is on the spectrum, the more likely that person is to attend and complete higher education, the more likely they are to read to their children, to run, etc. I'm oversimplifying some, but in part because social circles can highlight those things too. For example, DH and I mostly work with people with advanced degrees or people seeking them, so our expectations of what is "normal" are a bit skewed. And then there was the time I took some of the childbirth/baby prep classes when pregnant with R, and discovered I was pretty much the only person in the room who knew all the answers to the questions the teacher asked. DH and I kept calling those my Hermione "What, you haven't read Hogwarts, a History yet?" moments, but it also reminded us that the average person does not read several books on childbirth methods, breastfeeding, parenting, etc, and often several books about one particular style in order to compare perspectives either. rolleyes.gif

Mostly, I wish there was more $$ for differentiation at all levels and education in general. There's a waiting list for our G&T classrooms too, just as there's not quite enough services for the kids who need help with speech or other special issues on the other end either.

Good luck with getting the house ready![/quote]
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Speaking of Geo, where is she?

Probably being productive, writing articles, and doing all the things that I'm not while posting/procrastinating here, 'cause um, she rocks.

OK, article revision, here I come. (Can you tell it's freaking me out?)

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Old 04-23-2012, 04:33 AM
 
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Real, your insights and the points you make are so clear and coherent and articulate, and you approach those spots of--what, trained self-loathing?--that for me are for whatever reason scary places of introspection. It sure does make sense to leave the guilt behind--while also advocating for the kids on the other end of the special needs spectrum, and/or those on both ends.

 

And obviously a lot of what comes down is how much "extra" learning goes on at home. If school and curriculum are all we rely on, then yes, the bright kid will look elsewhere. And in the worst of circumstances, could (and do) look down the wrong alleys. Was listening to a "stuff you should know" podcast on genius and the discussions surrounding defining it, and it felt really healthy to think about the whole person, a person's potential vs. contribution, all that.

 

Made me realize even more clearly that, no matter how "good" or crappy a school my kids are in, I will always have to make up for deficits (perceived or real) in their education. In some schools, it's the half-hour gym class twice a week. In others, it's no art, or music, or library. Or teaching to the test instead of encouraging deeper or broader or more creative thinking. Or foreign language. Staring down the reality of educating my kids at home this fall, I am coming to realize just how important that part of the equation is. Gym class will not cultivate a habit of exercise. Health class will not teach healthy eating. Reading class will not facilitate a love of books and learning nearly as effectively as reading great books to my kids seems to do. So again, the YES to testing if it's offered, and taking whatever the services are that might be available. And finding ways to keep good friends around those kids, and keep up with being a generally curious family outside school.

 

And Shanti, here's to making up the deficits where we can, mama. I'll be teaching Islamic studies and working on Arabic language with my two in fall. A little nervous, yes, but I am confident we can learn together, look for practice, and find ways to grow in our new digs.

 

MelW, I hope there is a perfect sunscreen in there.

 

Mel38, you looked totally fab after that tri, btw. Congrats on the AG win, too. Awesome. And on Lincoln...wow. I just came off two Twain books and am now reading Uncle Tom's Cabin. Twain is so incredible and nuanced about stuff, but I just can't wrap my head around Dixie sometimes. Or ever. I am so northern I'm probably offensive to a lot of southerners.

 

Gaye--food poisoning, or what? I hope you're feeling better by now.

 

JayGee, hugs on the money stuff. When you do figure out how to make the grocery bills go down, let me know. We are pretty frugal about most things (usually only turn on AC when temps are over 85), but I hate it when something big comes along and knocks us off course. Whole foods, of course, are the way. And lots of fat to keep people full!

 

RR: I walked 4miles on the beach yesterday, and today did 8 miles. I can't seem to run yet this week. AF came last night, and temps are well into the 80s and low 90s, dust got kicked up to the point that my eyelid condition is inflamed and painful, and I just don't want to go harder. If I can get out really early tomorrow or soon, I will try doing the sprinty-ish intervals I did last Thursday around the park, which felt really good. About to do my strength and stretching routine before the kids come home, and may drag them out to the pool after dinner if I have anything left in me after homework.

 

And a good day to all Dingoes!

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Old 04-23-2012, 09:30 AM
 
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faint.gif  yikes2.gif  scared.gif  censored.gif  bawling.gif

 

Insert a bunch of words I shouldn't say on a designated family friendly website. The level of stress and lack of sleep got to me this morning and after I returned from taking ds to get more blood work done, I fainted. No big deal, it happens - except that as I fell I knocked my macbook to the floor and while I only have a small bruise and a huge headache, it is dead, done, kaput, no more. I took it to the shop as soon as the dizziness passed and I got some food and drink into me and any hope I had got thoroughly shot down. censored.gif  censored.gif  and double censored.gif. I did a backup about 3 weeks ago but I have no idea if the writing I have done since then will be salvageable. I feel sick. That was my guaranteed private space and has so much on there that I can never consider putting onto a shared computer. I think I am just about ready to go ask for that cashier job at the grocery store. I give up on trying to make anything better work.

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Old 04-23-2012, 09:52 AM
 
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hug2.gifgoodvibes.gifShanti! I'm so sorry!

 

So stressed out that you fainted? That is worrisome. Have you fainted before? I'm more worried about you than the 'puter. But I can understand that is a devastating thing to have it suddenly dead like that. Absolutely no chance of data recovery?
 


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Old 04-23-2012, 11:12 AM
 
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Shanti ~ oh no!  I'm so sorry your computer died, but like Mel38, worried that you passed out!  I'll be thinking of you today grouphug.gif.

 

Mel38 ~ awesome tri and congrats on the AG medal! 

 

All the gifted education talk is very interesting.  I tested for G&T and missed the IQ cutoff by one point.  My parents lobbied for me to be accepted, but the school refused.  So I was the "smart kid", but not gifted.  Whatever that means.  DS has tested as gifted, but doesn't seem to have any of those "bonus traits".  Not that it matters at our school anyway, since there is no funding for gifted ed.  I do agree that it does seem a little bit self-selecting.  My Dad is one smart dude, whereas my Mom is more middle-of-the-road, hence my smart, but not gifted, status!

 

RR ~ Went to Pilates this morning, and am going for a walk/run a la C25K in about an hour.  I have decided that running in the early afternoon when I can makes sense AND keeps me from my usual tendancy to binge my way through the pantry at 2:00pm.

 

NRR ~ PTO Spring Fling is this Friday and all my contacts for the vendors were deleted by the e-mail virus that attacked my computer a few weeks ago.  AHHHHHHH!!!!  That means I actually, gulp, have to contact them by phone (my LEAST favorite thing in the whole wide world).

 

 


~~Kristina~~ Mama to DS(10/30/01), DD1(VBAC 3/28/04) and DD2(HBAC 5/21/06)
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Old 04-23-2012, 11:12 AM
 
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Oh Shanti!  That's terrible!  Are you sure you're okay?  Can anyone check you out?  Are you alone?  I'm so sorry about your computer too, I feel sick for you just thinking about it. greensad.gif


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Old 04-23-2012, 12:02 PM
 
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Shanti - that is very frightening!! Something obvious jumped at me though as regards the 'puter: would this be a place where funding might help? Dont refrain from taking it to the Yahoo group grouphug.gif


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Old 04-23-2012, 01:00 PM
 
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Shanti!!!! Oh no! Are you ok?

 

I also am very worried about you. I get how immense the loss of the computer is, which I hope will not add to the stress taking its toll on your body. Oh dear. grouphug.gif


 "Now bid me run, and I will strive with things impossible." (William Shakespeare -- Julius Caesar)

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Old 04-23-2012, 03:05 PM
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Oh, Shanti.  Please take care of yourself, and put your physical health at a higher priority than a computer. hug2.gif  I get that the computer represents a significant amount of mental health.  Maybe see what they can salvage for you? 

 

I have many thoughts about gifted education, but have been feeling so self absorbed this weekend.  Thank goodness it has been a very busy weekend, or I would have been moping and moaning and grieving on anyone that would stand still long enough!  I am feeling a bit better.  Still sad, still mourning, still trying to figure out how life continues without my dog in it.  Trying to figure out how a dog can mean SO much! 

 

RR: I have tri class tonight.  Which translates to a 90 minute bike ride.  I have tired legs, so will probably collapse tonight!


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Old 04-23-2012, 08:14 PM
 
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Greetings! Where's the Cliff's Notes for the Dingoes newcomers? winky.gif Each day I find the time to read through a page, there is another one that grows at the end. So I'll try to get to know everyone as we go. :-)

 

I don't usually run anymore, but once a year I find a race or two for fun. On deck for this year I'm doing a half marathon "Go Far Challenge" 5/18-19. Also I want to do a LoziLu 5k Mud Run but that's pending a team coming together (it looks like it would be more fun with friends) 6/2.

 

Shanti - It might cost a lot, but the data is certainly recoverable from your hard drive. If the place you've taken it can't/won't recover the data, find some place else. It is possible or maybe even probable that another part of the laptop is broken, and that taking the hard drive out and putting it in another computer, it would be readable without anything special. If you're looking for DIY, there are external hard drive cases that you can buy to connect a laptop drive to any computer (using USB). I've previously used a software called R-Studio to recover data from corrupted drives, though I'm sure there other options available. Good luck. As the other ladies said, take care of yourself, but I understand the horrible feeling of losing data.


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Old 04-23-2012, 09:37 PM
 
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Shanti, I totally understand your feeling, but I hope you're all right. This is not good, mama.

 

And autumngrey is right. Your machine might not work, but the data should be recoverable. Even just a USB flash drive is enough to store a lot of writing on. Or upload to your own Gmail account. Not foolproof, but protected. Hang onto it and let us know how to help. innocent.gif

 

Good news: dh made some calls and I think we can afford to fly the Siberian cat to the US. It's a logistical mess, sort of, and I am not sure about crate rules and blah blah blah, and I need to get to a govt office to get a certificate of health, but it's not the $3500 the pet relo people want. I plan to re-home him with a friend. It will be sad, but I think he came into our lives to find a loving home and get out of a country that's too hot for him. And it's not OK to make a cat fly 15 hours twice a year for my desire to enjoy him. MN will be perfect for him.

 

And after a lot of back and forth, it looks like we will all be able to fly together and dh may get about 3 weeks at home with us.

 

Bad news: the dust is making me ill again. Breathing is bad and blepharitis, the fantastic condition I acquired when I infected my eyes a couple years ago, is flared up and painful. So dumb. It just rained a little, though, so maybe the air is a little cleaner than the past few days and I can steal a quick run before it heats up. jog.gif

 

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Old 04-23-2012, 10:37 PM
 
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1jooj--That's super cool about the Islamic studies and Arabic for your kids next year. And yes to everything about supplementing education outside of school. Interestingly, that can work both ways. I discovered I actually liked lifting weights thanks to my high school gym class. I loved the fact that they made it no big deal and that it was just like going to a gym because the gym teachers basically hung out to make sure we weren't messing around on the equipment and we'd do the weight circuit. Sorry to hear that the weather is causing health problems, but I hope they clear up and you're able to get a run in.

Shanti--I'm sooooo sorry about your computer. I've lost hard drives twice and it's awful. And like the others, I'm concerned about the fainting. Hormone stuff or not eating enough or....?

JayGee--Oh, for 1 more point! That's where things get difficult, because obviously there's no hard and fast rule and you would done just fine. And if they were just using an IQ test as the qualification, then one point is pretty variable and definitely subject to change at all times. I get that everyone has to draw the line somewhere, but it's close enough, yk? And for that matter, I think there's a reason that by high school, AP courses and the like aren't labeled "gifted" because that opens it up to anyone willing to take on the work without fussing over qualifying tests.

bec--a dog is never just a dog. And it's so hard when they're not around anymore.

RR: squeezed in a quick 10 on the bike this evening. It was a good night for it.

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Old 04-24-2012, 06:49 AM
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Oh, Jo!  When do you fly out?  I hope you are feeling better, and that the weather doesn't do too much damage to you.  I hope you get your run.  I am getting excited about the curriculum you are planning for your kids for next year!  I am sure they are going to rekindle that love of learning that has been so squashed this year!

 

Welcome Autumn!

 

So tri class was a  roller coaster.  Those of us training for a half ironman started out to get 5-6 in before riding with the rest of the group.  I was able to practice drafting off of our teacher.  Seriously, it was the most amazing feeling.  Going 20+mph, 12 inches off her back wheel, with what seemed no effort at all.  It was a total rush.  I have drafted in the pool before, and it is pretty cool, but had never done it on a bike.  Anyway, then we got back and headed out again with the whole group.  It was supposed to be a 30 minutes out, 30 minutes back ride.  About 5 minutes into it, we went over a rough patch of road, and I must have hit the back wheel wrong, and I blew a tube.  So, I walked my bike to a safe place, borrowed a pump that someone had on their bike, and changed my tube right there.  It was the rear tire, too, so I had to deal with the chain.  It took a while, and I was all greasy, but I was able to do it, felt kind of bad-assed and hard core.  I did get 16 miles in yesterday, so not a total wash.  But, it was starting to get chilly by then, so it was not as enjoyable as the ride started!


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Old 04-24-2012, 08:55 AM
 
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Thanks, bec. I'm really OK. Just caught dd's cold, then the dust moved in, and this whole eye and breathing thing is kind of the pits. On the bright side, the really bad humidity is not here yet, so I can get out and move in the mornings. And dh is getting out in the evenings, which is a plus. He took the kids swimming this evening.

 

I did get my run today. I did a lap of the park running 100m x walking 50m. Fast running (for me), not the usual slow pace. Then, I felt like going on, so I ran/walked another two laps for a total today of 12.5km. The body feels great. Probably back to the beach tomorrow, and maybe a swim, too. Did I mention I can do a couple push-ups? Yeah, me.

 

Flight will probably be booked today, and it looks like we'll all fly together. I think I am happy about this. It means I can be off-duty part of the 15 hours in flight. Should be back around Memorial Day, looks like, and dh will be around almost a month. But working. Me? Not working. biggrinbounce.gif And bonus, I should arrive in time to take my sister out for a birthday treat. joy.gif

 

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Old 04-24-2012, 10:13 AM
 
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Bec - I hear you on the surprising strength of the grief. Grommit wasnt *just* a great dog, he shared a very particular time of your life, and when he went, all of those shared experiences are mourned for too. While I really love our new doggie (for picking her at random at a shelter, we couldnt really have done better), she will never be my first baby, or the dog I ran for miles and miles with in several states on many trails, and had so many adventures with (hello backpacking). She was the dog that you think is human... until you have kids, and then no dog can be that way again. He sounds like he was very special, to be remembered so fondly by so many. ... and he never got to the point where he was digging poopy infant diapers out of the trash and eating them on the couch, like mine did (dont miss that! winky.gif) Take care mama

Jo - ugh, that sounds miserable. Its in your eye again? From the dust? Why does that eye get repeatedly messed up? Is it allergies? I'm so sorry you have to constantly deal with one challenge after another there. Im so happy for your trip-on-the-near-horizon. WTG on getting out for a run anyway, and the push-ups thumb.gif

Real - To be honest, I dont really know what we're talking about anymore lol.gif The distinction between *real* gifted, and smart kids, and whether those traits are inherited or nurtured, and that comments like mine, about being one of *those* parents perpetuates a stereotype about GT as not a real designation? I guess, what I was trying to say, is that I think its inherited, AND can be nurtured. I think some kids, like you and my dad, who grow up without outside/parental intellectual influence and yet are very advanced, are in my mind, more what the designation was meant for, to provide a teacher and peers who understand that level of intellectual precocity, and maybe the social awkwardness that goes with it. I think that kids like me, who grow up with a dad who is so hyper-literate and over-educated in a community of same, may have acquired skills through osmosis ('cause my dad sure didnt get involved in my education AT ALL, ironically) that allowed me to score well and get designated as GT, or maybe I had some heritable intellectual ability in there somewhere. But I know that culture is playing a bigger and bigger part in GT designation, which is one reason GT programs are predominantly white and middle to upper-middle class. And I dont know about bonus traits - my dad has always been very socially uncomfortable, to the point of having a hard time showing emotion to us kids. I guess that's a bonus to a point, as it made him hole up in his room and read voraciously as a kid. Anyway, Im sorry if it sounded like I was passing judgement on kids in gifted programs, or on gifted programs in general. I wasnt. And g-d yes do I wish for more diversification of learning in all classrooms, but honestly, I think that's been, and will continue to be, the biggest challenge of un-tracked classrooms. It was certainly the hardest thing about teaching for me; how to challenge all 40 students at their level, when some read at 4th grade and some should be in college already. There should be two teachers in every classroom for starters (and I'm talking high school), and a whole lot else that requires more money than anyone is ever going to give education eyesroll.gif

WTG on the ten miles thumb.giflol.gif


RR: Still none, but the weird hamstring thing is sorting itself out. Ive been giving myself A.R.T. by laying (oh dear, is it lying or laying, I cant remember) on my back and pulling my leg up, knee bent, finding the knot in the hamstring and pushing hard into one spot as I slowly straighten my leg toward the ceiling. Youch. In any case, I think the house may go on the market today!! joy.gif Which means getting back to exercise.... tomorrow? hide.gif

NRR: Yep, house on the market tomorrow. Final cleaning today, and finishing pictures, then we load them onto the MLS tonight. You will all get a link soon - you can see my cute house cleaner than it has EVER been lol.gif

Oh, and I went looking for the class schedule for Fall, so I can register, and looking over the program requirements and what classes are offered this Fall, I got so excited joy.gif Yay, I havent been excited about grad school until yesterday.... phew

mom to  dd1 (11) hearts.gif,  ds (9)bikenew.gif,  dd2 (6) dust.gif  , Daisy (4) dog2.gif
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Old 04-24-2012, 11:12 AM
 
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Jooj ~ I hope your eye is feeling better.  I am SO excited for you for your upcoming return to the states!  It's wonderful that DH will be there for at least a little while too.  Makes me want to plan a trip up north this summer orngbiggrin.gif!

 

sparkle ~ we are sisters in hamstring issues today.  Yuck.  I'll have to try ARTing it too.  Good luck on the house sale!  Can't wait to see the pics.

 

bec ~ drafing on the bike! Wheeeeeeeee!  I've ridden in pace lines a few times and it's fun, but kind of exhausting to be that focused on not getting too close to the guy in front of you.

 

Real ~ yeah, one point.  But I guess they have to draw the line somewhere.  And I ended up taking all honors and AP classes through high school anyway (well, except for math bag.gif, in which I am woefully average).

 

Welcome Autumngrey!!!!  You're running more than I am, that's for sure!

 

Speaking of which.... RR ~ Week 1, Day 1 of C25K completed yesterday.  Felt great and wanted to keep running after each segment.  Pesky hamstring is irritated today though.  So yesterday I did Pilates and ran/walked for 45 minutes, today I did Cardio Circuit class and 1/2 hour of yoga afterwards. 

 

NRR ~ off to school to work the book fair.

 

 


~~Kristina~~ Mama to DS(10/30/01), DD1(VBAC 3/28/04) and DD2(HBAC 5/21/06)
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Old 04-24-2012, 11:44 AM
 
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Hi ladies!! I miss you so I thought I would try to pop back on here and see if I can keep up.

Bec- I just read enough to see that your family lost Grommit. I am so sorry. I know how much he meant to you.

Been running with a church friend and it's helped us become really close. We are signed up to run a marathon relay together (team of 4) in October and a half in November.

Been homeschooling my special needs son since February due to crap at public school (both students and teachers). I have seen him blossom emotionally by leaps and bounds since pulling him out. He wants to do his school work now too which is a huge shift.

I still lead a large women's ministry at our church as well as work part time outside the home.

I'll try to check back in once a day!!
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