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Is it even possible to get your old body back?

4K views 38 replies 17 participants last post by  kindofcrunchy82 
#1 ·
Hi. For the past few weeks I've been doing lots of research about losing baby weight.

You see, my sister had her baby about a year ago, and has been struggling with her weight ever since. With the baby taking up most of her time, she struggles to stay motivated. She recently told me that she thinks her body and her has metabolism changed permanently, and that it is now impossible for her to get her old body back.

I however believe that it is possible for her to achieve her goals. To help her get motivated, I got the idea of interviewing moms who have successfully lost their baby weight. I want to put together an "inspirational booklet" of different moms who have lost their baby weight, along with how they did it.

If you are a mom who recently (past 3 years) gave birth, and you've managed to successfully get your old body back, I would really appreciate it if you reply and let me know what you did.
 
#2 ·
It's been more than three years since I had a baby, but I do have some major thoughts on this. At present, I am down below my pre-baby weight, but I'm down here because I had surgery with some awful complications. I am pretty sure that I'll gain the 15 missing pounds back when I feel better, and I'm looking forward to it.

The best shape of my life (which I achieved post-baby, in a highly unusual time when I had both children and the time to train for half marathons) and my pre-child shape were still pretty different. Having a baby changes your body. Your new body may have features you like better than the old version and features you like worse, but it absolutely will not be the same, even if you get to the same weight you started at.

"Losing the baby weight" is a commonly stated goal, but it's not a goal that has a lot of meaning for health. Healthy bodies come in a variety of shapes and weights. How does your sister feel? Does she like her energy level? Is she able to do the things she enjoys? Does she really need a booklet of stories about how other women lost weight, or would she prefer a standing coffee date with a friend, or a couple of flattering new outfits?
 
#5 ·
Thanks for your reply MeepyCat. Thanks for sharing your story. I appreciate your comments and thoughts.

Having talked to my sister, I think the main concerns she has is with her general health and the example that she sets for her son.

She never had a problem with her health, but since gaining the baby weight she has constantly struggled with back problems. She is also worried that being overweight will cause complications with her pregnancy if she wants to get pregnant again (having read some articles about being overweight during pregnancy causing miscarriages and increased risk for health problems for the baby).

She also told me that she wants to set a healthy example for her son. She wants him to grow up looking at her as an example of someone who is fit and healthy, not unfit, overweight and unhealthy.

The problem is that she believes that there is nothing she can do about it. Some of her friends have told her that her being overweight is just a normal consequence of being a mom, and that her metabolism has slowed down permanently and there is nothing she can do about it.

I don't believe this. I know that a women's body changes when she gives birth, but I don't believe that this means she just has to give up. I've heard of too many moms who have decided to challenge themselves and became even more healthy than before their children. That's basically what I want to accomplish - I want to give her inspirational stories to show her that it is possible, as well as tips and strategies that these moms have used. Everyone is different, and uses different strategies to lose their weight. I'm hoping that something someone did might resonate with her, and help her achieve her goals.

My first child is 4yo and my second is 20mo. I am back to my pre-pregnancy weight and was at about 18-19months with my first as well. However, I do not have the same body as I had before. And, no I probably never will.

Things such as breastfeeding and sleep deprivation can impact on weight loss or gain . Some women lose weight rapidly or steadily while breastfeeding but others hold some weight until they wean.
Unless your sister has specifically asked for this booklet I would reconsider. Respond to specific requests for help but otherwise drop the subject and just talk about other things :)
Thanks for your reply katelove. I understand what you are saying about your body shape having changed. It is difficult to just drop the subject, as I can see that it is really bothering her. I am also worried about her, and would like to help her. Why do you think I should reconsider the booklet? Do you think it is a bad idea, or would have negative consequences?

I'd say my body was nearly the same as before with first baby (now 27 months old). Second baby is now 2 months and I've only got 10 more pounds to lose, but I can already tell that my body is not the same as before and will likely never be.
Thanks for taking the time to reply sierramtngirl. Did you focus on losing weight before your second pregnancy? My sister has told me that she is worried about complications with her pregnancy if she is still overweight before getting pregnant.
 
#3 ·
My first child is 4yo and my second is 20mo. I am back to my pre-pregnancy weight and was at about 18-19months with my first as well. However, I do not have the same body as I had before. And, no I probably never will.

Things such as breastfeeding and sleep deprivation can impact on weight loss or gain . Some women lose weight rapidly or steadily while breastfeeding but others hold some weight until they wean.
Unless your sister has specifically asked for this booklet I would reconsider. Respond to specific requests for help but otherwise drop the subject and just talk about other things :)
 
#4 ·
I'd say my body was nearly the same as before with first baby (now 27 months old). Second baby is now 2 months and I've only got 10 more pounds to lose, but I can already tell that my body is not the same as before and will likely never be.
 
#6 ·
I have no idea how much weight your sister gained, or wants to lose. I'm going to focus on back problems.

Back problems are things that commonly come up during pregnancy for fairly obvious reasons, and they can have major impacts on health because they make a bunch of things harder to do. If your sister is having back problems, she should talk to her doctor about it and consider physical therapy, which genuinely will help her feel better and do more. Something like yoga might also help, but she should check in with her doctor first, to make sure it's not going to cause problems.

In my opinion, if you can:
- Lift the things you want to lift,
- Enjoy an active game, or dance to five good songs in a row,
- Go a mile at a speed of your choice under your own power,
you're healthy.

Working on those things might be a better goal than a number on a scale, and someone should certainly tell your sister that she doesn't have to live with back pain.
 
#7 ·
I did want to get back down to my pre preg wt before getting pregnant again, mostly because it's the weight that I feel best at (as I mentioned above, I'm about 10# above this wt now and I do notice more aches and pains, especially back pain). But, I was not terribly difficult for me to get back to my goal wt with my first baby. #1 I gained ~30# with her during my pregnancy. #2 I nursed her- huge help with my wt loss. #3 I'm an active person by nature and we eat a relatively healthy diet.
 
#8 ·
Things can change after having a baby but that doesn't mean that you can't be healthy and fit after having kids. The most important thing is to follow common sense guidelines for exercise and diet. If she's nursing it is especially important to watch her diet for health as her body is still nourishing the baby. Like others said above sometimes women will hold 10-15 lbs of weight until they wean. I would suggest spending time getting active with her if you can. Pick an activity you both would enjoy like walking, biking or anything else and do it together. It'll help her increase exercise time and be a good motivator.


You mentioned back problems being a major concern though. Why does she feel the back pain is from the weight? Depending on what type of pain it is if she had an epidural it could be from that instead of weight. I know many women that had back pain after labor from their epidurals that had nothing to do with weight. I would consider that as a possibility as well.
 
#9 ·
I have back pain too. Ive recently started seeing a physiotherapist who specialises in back pain. The changes of pregnancy and subsequent carrying around of a baby can certainly cause back issues regardless of weight. Often core strength is a problem so doing yoga or Pilates which increases core muscle strength can help. She should be aware though that some typical "core" exercises are not recommended if women have a persisting diastasis rectus separation after giving birth. You can also have joint issues - SI or facet joint for example - after pregnancy which require specific exercises to correct. A good physio can help with all these things.

The reason I suggested abandoning the booklet plan was that I thought it might be fairly demoralising to be presented with a whole array of women who have done what she wants to but can't. However, I do disagree with her friends who said that being overweight is just part and parcel of mothering and I wholeheartedly agree with her reasons for wanting to lose weight. Children of overweight parents are more likely to be overweight themselves. Would she be interested in joining this forum? I don't know if you noticed but there is a weight loss group which does 8 week "challenges". I find it quite motivating to come on each week and record my weight. Maybe something like that would help.
 
#10 ·
I think "old body back" is not a good goal and not a healthy way to view one's self at all.

I also wonder if she overall seems to be doing OK, or if she is overwhelmed, depressed, isolated, etc. A lot of stuff changes when you have a baby -- your body is just one of them. Many couples have a rough time adjusting from going from being a couple to being parents. Most people find caring for a baby is more work than they thought it would be. Some people find it affects their relationships with friends. I wonder if fixating on her body is easier than dealing with some of the other stuff.

I don't think enabling her obsession with the changes in her body is healthy for her or good for your relationship.

It is possible to be at a healthy weight and be in good shape after having kids, but that isn't the same as getting your old body back. My tummy will never, ever be the same. The spider veins and stretchmarks aren't going anywhere. It's not the same. And why should it be? I grew 2 humans inside me.

I lost 70 pounds and became a yoga teacher after having kids. My advice:

1. accept that your body isn't the same as it was, and it never will be. and it will keep getting older. (but that's all the bad news)

2. practice self care in ways that work for you. Besides being good for health, it cuts down on stress eating and eating crap because its the only nice thing you do for yourself. If the only nice thing you've done for yourself in the last week is eat a candy bar, this is really important step.

3. eat in the way that is healthy for YOUR body. It's not the same for all of us. Some are vegetarian, some are high protein, I eat Paleo. I truly believe that different things work better for different people.

4. move in ways that feel good to you. I think exercise gets bantered around like it is some sort of punishment we must put ourselves through because we are bad. I don't buy it. I believe that moving is fun and that it is part of enjoying being in our bodies. What does your sister like to do? What would have to change in her life for her to be able to do it? The weird thing is, if she started doing something she liked, whether or not she lost weight she would like her body more.

5. speak kindly to ourselves. If your sister were asking for advice, I would encourage her to make herself a sign that reads, "My body is amazing and strong. I gave birth to my baby" and hang it on her mirror where she could read it every morning. I teach a yoga class once a week, and at some point in a quiet pose, I tell my students to send love and gratitude to every cell in their bodies.

(But I have loose skin, scars, spider veins, etc. I just decided to love my body and appreciate everything it has done and everything it can do anyway.)
 
#11 ·
It is possible to get your old body back after having a baby! Maybe it is not the norm, but it is possible. I still look the same after 2 kids, and I know other women who look the same after having children (well, at least as far as I can tell with their clothes on lol!!) Your sister should not listen to those other women and give up without trying. She just might be able to lose weight and return to the way she used to be, or close to it. She'll never know unless she tries! Of course, there is always the possibility that she will not return to her former size, but again, how else can she know for sure unless she tries?

My daughter is 4 and son is 11, so I'm out of the range for your survey. I just wanted to chime in and say there is always a chance for your sister, because I know people who have gone back to the way they used to be! It can happen.
 
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#13 ·
Hi. Thanks for everyone who replied with some great advice. Here's the main points I got out of the replies:

  • The focus shouldn't be on getting your old body back, and that is generally not possible. Rather, the focus should be on being healthy, and accepting your body as it is.
  • Rather than focus on a specific exercise plan, try to find ways to life more healthily by creating a healthy lifestyle and habits.
  • Having the right motivation is very important - if you are motivated to lose weight to be more healthy it is better than trying to lose weight to look like you did before your pregnancy.
  • It is possible for some people to look like they did before pregnancy (thanks beckybird!), however not everyone can achieve this.
It think the most important lesson that I learned from this thread is that the way we phrase this goal is very important. If my sister wants "to get her old body back", it can lead to heartache and disappointment. However, there is nothing wrong with trying to lose weight so that she can feel more energetic, healthy, and be a better example for her kids. She should try to focus on the positive benefits in the future, not on getting something back that she lost.
 
#14 ·
I agree that a book of success stories could be a bit demoralizing... unless she was the one seeking the information herself... I gained WAY too much with my first baby and too much with my second. For the past seven years I have worked my butt off to try to get my "pre baby" body back. I think that for some people it just doesn't work like that. I never did get my pre body back, but I was also 18, weighed 110 lbs at 5'2, and had a beautiful flat stomach. Nowadays, I do not have a flat stomach, never did get that back (pregnant right now, lol), the skin on my stomach is loose and covered in stretch marks, and I'm sure I don't look as good naked as I once did. But, I have two beautiful children who are thin and healthy and eat great, I can cook up the tastiest healthy meals (with lots of learning and research on eating healthy), I can run 3.5 miles without walking, and can really do a bad ass job on my workouts. The important thing is to feel good. Some people will never look the same and some bounce back within a couple of months. It is important for her not to compare herself to others.


The best gift you could give her is to offer your "personal training" services. If you really care about her health and her weight loss goals, workout with her. I remember in the early years thinking that if I just had someone to motivate me and do this battle with me I could accomplish so much more. Pick up a good workout video (The medicine ball was my savior after my second child) and the two of you could work out a routine and just good old fashioned ass kicking will do the trick. Just be there for her, tell her she's beautiful and she's got this. You are a great sister for caring!
 
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#28 ·
I agree that a book of success stories could be a bit demoralizing... unless she was the one seeking the information herself... I gained WAY too much with my first baby and too much with my second. For the past seven years I have worked my butt off to try to get my "pre baby" body back. I think that for some people it just doesn't work like that. I never did get my pre body back, but I was also 18, weighed 110 lbs at 5'2, and had a beautiful flat stomach. Nowadays, I do not have a flat stomach, never did get that back (pregnant right now, lol), the skin on my stomach is loose and covered in stretch marks, and I'm sure I don't look as good naked as I once did. But, I have two beautiful children who are thin and healthy and eat great, I can cook up the tastiest healthy meals (with lots of learning and research on eating healthy), I can run 3.5 miles without walking, and can really do a bad ass job on my workouts. The important thing is to feel good. Some people will never look the same and some bounce back within a couple of months. It is important for her not to compare herself to others.

The best gift you could give her is to offer your "personal training" services. If you really care about her health and her weight loss goals, workout with her. I remember in the early years thinking that if I just had someone to motivate me and do this battle with me I could accomplish so much more. Pick up a good workout video (The medicine ball was my savior after my second child) and the two of you could work out a routine and just good old fashioned ass kicking will do the trick. Just be there for her, tell her she's beautiful and she's got this. You are a great sister for caring!
Hi mamabear. Thanks for the feedback regarding the possibility that the book might be demoralizing. I wonder if the booklet shouldn't rather be focused on different ways that moms have achieved their goals instead of just focusing on the fact that they did. In other words, a book of tips and strategies that different moms have used to achieve their goals, whatever they are.

The problem as I see it is that she is in any case going to be reading about people who have lost weight, because that's just what people do who want to lose weight. Unfortunately, a lot of those people aren't moms, and don't have the same restrictions and requirements as she has. That might be even more demotivating, because they could achieve results much easier because they didn't have a baby to care for.

I'm also worried about the advice that she is currently getting from her (non-mom) friends. Recently, she has started going onto different fad diets (high protein, fasting, etc). I'm always very suspicious about these types of diets, as it seems to me that they are simply "quick fixes" and don't lead to long term health, only short term weight loss.
 
#15 ·
I didn't. I wore the same size clothes, but they fit different. And I like it.

But I did struggle with my self image for a while. Not from my size, but my energy level. I made some changes, and still am. Recently I started reading personal development books. (Like Darren Hardy's the compound effect) One thing I found encouraging was how they point out success does not come overnight.
I also take an awesome whole food supplement.

I think it's awesome that you want to help her, for her to know it is possible.
Maybe ask her what sort of activities she would like to do, and do it with her.
 
#29 ·
Hi OklaFarmMama

Thanks for the recommendation about the book, I'm going to check it out. Here's the link for anyone else interested in Darren Hardy's Compound Effect. I'm a great believer in the fact the it is the small things that you do every day that determine how you look and feel. It's not the big changes you make, but rather the 100's of small changes.

What whole food supplement are you taking?

Thanks for the encouragement. Unfortunately it is not always possible for me to do things with her, as we don't live close to each other. That's why I want to try and help in other ways.
 
#16 ·
I have never been pregnant..yet;-) but looking at all of my friends with kids i can say that all of them have changed! I mean their bodies. You should accept the fact that your body will be different - not better, not worse, just different! Some of women i know gain weight and were not able to lose it (have to say they tried not as hard as they should, so it's their own mistake). Other of my friends lost weight they gain during the pregnancy and even more!! But they really went crazy about their weight after birth: started lots of diets at once, were spending hours at the gym. So it was not a miracle or god's blessing, it was hard work they do. But most of the women i know stayed the same after birth. Well almost the same;-) As i told your body will change for sure and will be different. I advise only to eat healthy food, be active (walk, ride a bike, swim, do not use elevator) and smile every morning to yourself! Love yourself and your child and be happy! and everything will be great! best of luck:grin:
 
#17 ·
Ginger, this post is, possibly accidentally, pretty hurtful.

Either your friends didn't lose the baby weight, and that's their own fault for not trying hard enough, OR your friends "went crazy" and possibly overboard and lost the weight.

As a mother, I want friends who understand the relative importance of things like weight, fitness, beauty, and character. If I look great, I'd love a compliment, but motherhood involves looking hideous from time to time, and I can't really be friends with anyone who sees me on a bad day (or who sees the cumulative effect of parenting choices like "kids before zumba", or "Friday night sundaes/family bonding night" or "i hold a full-time job and took 2 kids to 4 ot sessions this week") and thinks "her fault!"
 
#20 ·
My kids were 15 and 17 when we did the 5K, but they could have done it younger. We did it with a group of women from work and their DDs. The youngest was 11.

I really hate the crap that new moms get about weight and exercise. After my first, it wasn't a big deal -- she was a super easy baby and my body just bounced back. After my second, things were very rough. I had a high need baby and a toddler, and the toddle had developmental issues. I was a zombie from lack of sleep and days revolved around appointments for DD#1, while having a screaming baby in tow.

And I'm quite sure that people (mostly women) looked at my body and felt I "wasn't trying hard enough," without any clue of what of I was going through.
 
#21 ·
Eleven, awesome! I can probably take DS (7) out on the track with me when the surgeon clears me to run again (DS is faster than I am, but usually has shorter range). DD (age 4) is very enthusiastic about running with me, but I have to be willing to bounce in place from time to time, because she gets upset if I stop to wait while she catches up.

Women are subjected to a weird social load of aesthetic judgment. It's like your life doesn't matter, just your weight. If you're "too heavy," you get judged for it, even if the reasons you're too heavy are totally unassailable. You could be a cancer patient who spends your spare time training abandoned puppies to be therapy dogs for homeless veterans, instead of working off the chemo steroid weight at the gym - it doesn't matter, guys on the street will still tell you you're fat. And if you're thin, it doesn't seem to matter how you got there. It's like crack addiction is weirdly laudable because you lose weight.
 
#22 ·
I agree that the focus needs to be on health and self-esteem rather than on looking/weighing exactly as before.

I was very thin until I started trying to conceive my first child, at which point I purposely gained 10 pounds in hopes that a higher body fat level would improve my hormonal cycling. It didn't, but I eventually did get pregnant. By the time my son was 5 months old I'd dropped to my original weight, NOT because I did any crazy diet or workouts but because I have the kind of body that gets very thin if I give it a chance. Getting UP to a healthy weight and staying there takes effort for me. I had not intended to get back to my college weight, but there I was--yet my waist was 5 inches bigger around than it had been. This time, I think I'm back to my pre-pregnancy weight (don't have a scale) and waist size--that is, my weight is about what it is at the time of conception of each child, which is a healthy weight, and my waist is the size it became after the first pregnancy. I am never going to have a 22-inch waist again, but that's okay! This time, I have made a much stronger effort to eat ASAP when I'm hungry and eat as much as I want of healthy foods, emphasizing fiber and protein. I've (mostly) avoided doing the mother-martyr "I don't have time to eat" act that I did with my son. I feel a zillion times stronger, and a bunch of people who've known me since before my son was born have commented on how my skin looks better and I look overall healthier than I did then.

Aside from my metabolism, there are 2 things I've done that I think have been really helpful in losing pregnancy weight and regaining abdominal muscle tone:

  1. If it's possible to walk somewhere instead of driving, I walk and carry baby in a carrier, which is better exercise than pushing a stroller. I also take baby for walks when she's restless. I walk about 3 miles a day on average, even now that I'm back to work. I don't treat it as a "workout", just part of life. (I wear good walking shoes all the time, except the specialest occasions.)
  2. I sit on an exercise ball at my desk. If your sister doesn't have a desk job but does like to watch TV, this is a great thing to do in front of TV as well.
My core strength since I discovered the exercise ball is much BETTER than it ever was before my first pregnancy! I can do things on the playground that I couldn't do when I was a kid! And because I went into the subsequent pregnancy so strong, my abs recovered really quickly this time.

I agree that her back pain may be from carrying the baby awkwardly or from something that got out of whack during pregnancy, and that she should focus on strengthening her back rather than blaming a few extra pounds for the back pain.

I hope things go well for her! Encourage her to join these forums--great for support of so many kinds!
 
#27 ·
I lost all my baby weight twice. I practice "intuitive eating," which basically means eating whatever the hell you want, when you want it, while being as mindful as possible of how your body feels. This means eating crap and feeling how crappy it feels, while making no vows to undo your actions. It also means eating vegetables and really enjoying them. I also do exercise I enjoy, most days a week, and no exercise I don't enjoy. I also exercise my "transverse abdominus." This helps with abdominal separation. I also do Kegel exercises. I only do these exercises because I have found ways to enjoy and remember them.

My body is different and will not return to my "old body." I have some stretch marks and loose skin. I love my body more than I have ever loved it before. I birthed two babies, I've carried them and made my arms and back strong. I find time to exercise because I enjoy how it feels, not because I think it will redeem me in anyone else's eyes.

My best advice: celebrate and enjoy your body.
 
#32 ·
A lot of the feedback that I've been getting is to simply tell her to be happy with the way she looks. However, feel that that advice can be just as harmful as telling her she needs to be thin to look good. My opinion is that she needs to be able to decide how she wants to look, whether that means she wants to be overweight or normal weight. What do you think?
This is complicated. I agree that it is not healthy to tell a person to be happy about something she is inclined to feel unhappy about, and that it is unwise to be too complacent about being overweight because it can damage her health. On the other hand, nobody is fully able to "decide how she wants to look" so it's important to practice some level of acceptance and appreciation of her imperfect body.

I think the goal should be a HEALTHY WEIGHT, and that is about so much more than the number on the scale. She should be eating and exercising in ways that make her feel strong and energetic enough to keep up with her child and that gradually bring her body to a shape that is comfortable for her. Body comfort is not just about the way you look but also about the physical experience of living in your body. (For example, when I was underweight I did not have enough cushioning for sitting in less-than-ideal places. If I did something like sitting on concrete steps waiting 45 minutes for a bus while the evening was getting colder, the next day my hip joints would be crippled so that I could barely walk and every movement ached.) She should work out everyday habits that allow her to maintain a fairly consistent size. That size might be bigger than she used to be. It does not have to be a whole lot bigger, and it certainly does not have to be constantly expanding. Finding balance is a healthy goal.
 
#34 ·
What a great thread! I agree with pps who said that aiming to "get your old body back" is unhealthy, or at least off the mark. For myself and all my mom friends that I've talked to about this IRL, our bodies change after childbirth. In ways that can be hard to adjust too but also in wonderfully surprising ways. In my case, I've always been slim but I had a very round "bubble butt". My husband loved it and having curves back there is desirable to many people but I always hated it, mainly because it was so hard to fit pants. Shopping was embarrassing and frustrating. After having my first child, I was heavier than ever before (I gained 60-70 lbs despite lots of vomiting!) but I was a lot happier with my proportions. While other areas grew, my butt totally slimmed down! I had to go up a few sizes but clothes fit better and more comfortably. I knew I wanted to get pregnant again soon, so I chose not to focus on the positive (for me it was my new butt, maybe your sister has an area she likes better now too?) and not make any special effort to lose the weight, knowing I'd probably just put it all back on as soon as I got pregnant (aka the carb train) again. Some weight came off on it's own, and the rest I just ignored for the time being.

After DS2 was born, I still didn't worry about the extra weight again for a while. I saw the same weight gain happen to almost everyone around me and it was obvious that very few women go back to their "old body." I told myself that it's a rite of passage. My husband didn't seem to mind and again I focused on the positive - my huge nursing boobs balanced out my figure (I'm usually an A cup so going up to a C-D definitely helped with the bigger hips/waist). I knew I'd be more comfortable in my skin if I lost 15-20 lbs but I didn't feel any urgency about it. With two boys less than 2 years apart and renovating a big house, I had enough other things to be stressed out about.

Learning how to be a good, happy parent those first few years at home with two kids was harder than I expected but gradually I started to feel more like the mom I wanted to be and less chaotic from day to day. I was approaching 40 and starting to think about trying for #3 . I felt though that I had to prove to myself that I could be in control of my personal independent life before adding the chaos that a third child might bring, so that I could have confidence that I could address instead of resent the sacrifices another child might bring. I knew it would be harder as I got older. So before getting preg again, I set some goals such as helping DS2 make progress with his separation anxiety, carving out time to read novels again, planting a new garden... and losing 25 lbs.

I'm pleased to say that I did it. It took about a year to get back to my pre-DS1 weight. I never went to the gym or followed a strict diet. I simply moved more - went up and down the stairs at home more quickly and more often, carried heavier loads of groceries, ran after the kids more, took them on more rigorous hikes (easier as they get older), hauled rocks in the garden, left the stroller behind and piggy backed instead, that sort of thing. For eating, I just did my best to cut down on sugar and wheat. I tried to have an apple instead of crackers for snacks, etc. More importantly I think, I worked hard at consciously parenting the way I wanted to and enjoying every day with my boys and my friends - this gave me enormous confidence and made losing weight feel effortless. For me, losing weight was part of a much bigger picture. To try to address it in isolation would have been futile.

I was proud of myself but I also noticed that I didn't look as good at that lower weight as I had before kids. My proportions had changed so much that I needed a few more pounds than before to fill out my chest and face, etc, to look younger and healthier. This is a great thing! I wouldn't want my pre-children body back for anything now.

Now I am pregnant again and packing it on once again - 10 lbs a month so far! But I'm okay with it because I know that this is how my body works and with lots of time and patience, it will come off...if I want it to. I have been down this road enough times to know that my body also looks just as beautiful, but different, at this heavier weight.

One last random thing that helped me a long the way - since having kids I've spent more time at beaches, water parks and pools than ever before in my life. Gradually chilling out and feeling okay about being in a bathing suit (it's about having a good time with the kids after all) and also seeing so many different bodies without clothes has been a great learning experience - nobody is perfect and everyone is beautiful in their own way. We're all just people after all. I love seeing baby bellies, misshapen tattoos, mysterious scars, all of it! We are all so different and ever changing on the outside.
 
#36 ·
So sorry I'm just replying. I'd only been getting on here on my phone, and it wasn't giving me all of my updates. The supplement is called Zeal, the company is pretty new but growing fast. I actually sell it. jocelynpaige.zealforlife.com
Also there is another book I'm not sure why I didn't share before. It's called Captivating, by John and Stasi Eldredge, it really helped me feel like I didn't have to be anyone other then me.
 
#37 ·
You can do ab rehab and get a strong core again. By eating a slight caloric deficit on most days of the week you can lose extra pregnancy pounds. But skin does not rebound after pregnancy. All moms have looser belly skin after their first pregnancy. When you see drum-tight belly skin on a mom with kids, you're looking at a tummy-tuck.
BeFit-Mom
 
#39 ·
for me it is a no, I have bounce around with weight, and post baby, I had to go through extreme dieting and/or exercise or traumatic stress to lose the weight. I can lose the weight, but my body is not the same. In fact I have gotten down well below pre baby weight about 15 lbs or so, but my tummy is all stretched out, so no, my body will never be the same as pre baby. The weight can be lost, but not easily at least not for me.
 
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