Polite suggestions please? JWs won't leave us alone. - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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Old 06-11-2008, 07:23 PM
 
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Wow. When I was a JW (admittedly 12 years ago), we were expressly told to avoid going door-to-door on "family holidays." I don't think Memorial Day would have been given a pass, but there's no way Thanksgiving would have been an option...or Christmas, or Easter or probably even 4th of July.
I would bring that up with them next time they come (if they do) but I fear demonstrating such knowledge might make them encouraged to come back again. I was very shocked about the Thanksgiving one; and it was the first holiday we had been around in a long time....we usually never celebrate the major ones at home since our fam is all over the place. They are just lucky I opened the door and not my father

But still no visits here that I know of, so we still seem to be in the clear.

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Old 06-12-2008, 09:41 AM - Thread Starter
 
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____________

well Grace -- how did the weekend go
No visit last weekend! Yay! I don't think they'll come this weekend either and if they do I'll insist that they take my literature before I take theirs.

Thanks for thinking of me
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Old 06-14-2008, 01:43 AM
 
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i just read this whole thread and it practically killed me with laughter...
probably because I was JW for many years and I was awful at keeping track of what houses I visited and what houses wanted what because I really was not a good JW... so I am pretty sure that the people that asked me to never come back got visits again because I never turned anything in and was awful at writing it all down. I just was there to do my "time" and get on with my life...

I must apologize to all of you for the JWs that are like me (trust me, there are alot of them) that really arent good at keeping track of that stuff so nobody gets word that you dont want another visit ever again... lol.

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Old 06-14-2008, 02:13 AM - Thread Starter
 
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They came again today :

I didn't have anything photocopied so I'm ringing the Kingdom Hall to demand that I be taken off the list. I just want the harassment to stop.
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Old 06-14-2008, 02:30 AM
 
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I have always been very honest with them and told them truthfully I was raised in one religion, did my soulsearching and research and converted to another. I say that I admire their religion, but I have found peace in my own. The mezzuzzah on my door way is a clear sign of that. I am happy to educate them on its meaning.

i honestly have never had problems with JWs; they have always been my best neighbors.

"The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie, deliberate, contrived and dishonest, but the myth, persistent, persuasive and unrealistic."
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Old 06-14-2008, 12:30 PM
 
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They came again today :

I didn't have anything photocopied so I'm ringing the Kingdom Hall to demand that I be taken off the list. I just want the harassment to stop.
Wow! Yes, I think it's time for a call to the missionaries' "boss".

What did you tell them this time?

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Old 06-14-2008, 09:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Wow! Yes, I think it's time for a call to the missionaries' "boss".

What did you tell them this time?
At the door I told them that we all had a really contagious virus. They ran away fast.

On the phone I told them that I want to be put on their 'do not call' list because we've been harassed for way too long and they're not getting the message even though we've asked them not to come back. I spoke to a little old lady - I wasn't polite but I wasn't rude. I was just blunt and firm.

I'm also getting a sign to put on my door.
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Old 06-15-2008, 10:17 PM
 
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Is it the same person coming back? Or new people? The new people thing wouldnt make sense unless they have double territories checked out or something. How it works worldwide (at least in places where we arent banned) is one person checks out a territory card and goes through the territory. If people are not home, they come back to the "not at home" houses. There is a little map and it shows where to go so places arent "double done" unless its a mistake (I've done a wrong street on accident before, when people were saying "you guys were just here yesterday" I figured something was wrong and I was on the wrong street. Oops. I said "I'm sorry" and went and re-read the card.)

Anyways, if its the same person I'm guessing you are a "return visit" which means she (he?) thought you showed interest or were otherwise friendly nice/liked to talk about the bible, etc. If you continue taking literature, they will think you still want it. I know some people who never want to read the bible, change religions, etc but they like reading the magazines and have asked me to bring those back (the Awake magazine has articles about health, animals, islands, misc stuff.) Or some elderly people without many visitors, sometimes they just like company...or have you read them a scripture and then help with their mail or something. If its the same person I think you just need to be honest with them and say "I really truly do not want to come back."

When the next person checks out the territory card (every few months they are worked in areas where there are a lot of us, like here in Southern Cali but in rural areas more like 1 x a year) a new person may come. We come back because circumstances change, people move, new ones move in, etc but to me what you are describing is a "return visit" (repeated visits from the same person.)

Ultimately we do it because we believe in following Jesus footsteps and Jesus preached. We believe that the Bible tells us to do so (Matthew 24:14, Matthew 28: 19, 20, Isaiah 61:1) I know its not always comfortable. I get pest control people here a few times a week and I honestly sometimes think "AGAIN?!" I said "no thank you" 50 times...but last week I found a bunch of carpenter ants..so when he came this last time, we chatted and I asked for more info. HAHA Not really the same thing but having been on both sides of the door, that's my closest relatable story. LOL!!!

When you called the hall did you give them your address? You might need to so they can know what congregation even covers your territory. Our halls are pretty small so we usually "share" the hall with 3+ congregations. In my area we have 3 english and 3 spanish speaking. Your territory will only be "covered" by one of those though, it's all divided up.

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Old 06-18-2008, 09:09 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for the explanation

It was different people every week. When I rang, I gave them my address and told them not to come again, ever. Hopefully this time they'll respect our request.
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Old 06-18-2008, 09:22 AM
 
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We've thought of putting up a "No Soliciting of Any Kind" on our door as well. The JW's come around a few times a month, and I'm getting tired of the having the same conversation.
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Old 06-18-2008, 12:23 PM
 
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We've thought of putting up a "No Soliciting of Any Kind" on our door as well. The JW's come around a few times a month, and I'm getting tired of the having the same conversation.
When I was a JW, we were told that no soliciting signs didn't really apply to us because soliciting meant you were making an exchange for money. (That's not what my Webster's says, but that was the interpretation we were given at the meetings.) So a sign on the door didn't really mean anything to us. We'd knock anyway. Based on my experience, there is literally NOTHING you can do to become a "do not call" other than directly ask whomever was at your door to put you on the do not call list, and often that needed to be followed up by a call to the congregation to confirm it.

For what it's worth, despite my having told four consecutive people nicely that I was a former JW and had no intention of coming back, and to put me on the list, and having called the Kingdom Hall twice, it was over two years at my current address before people quit coming. *knock wood*
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Old 06-18-2008, 12:40 PM
 
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I'm one of those people that don't mind chatting with the JW at the door. Which is why they keep coming back (much to my husband's annoyance).

BUT, I did notice this sign on my neighbour's door. The message was typed out in an attractive, bold font on white paper. The sign has been on their front door for several years and from what I see (they are across from us), they are not bothered with JW or anyone else.

The message is:

Please no solicitors. Do not try to sell us anything. And if you want to convert us to your religion, sorry, do not bother. We are quite happy the way things are. Thank you.
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Old 06-18-2008, 12:42 PM
 
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When I was a JW, we were told that no soliciting signs didn't really apply to us because soliciting meant you were making an exchange for money. (That's not what my Webster's says, but that was the interpretation we were given at the meetings.) So a sign on the door didn't really mean anything to us. We'd knock anyway. Based on my experience, there is literally NOTHING you can do to become a "do not call" other than directly ask whomever was at your door to put you on the do not call list, and often that needed to be followed up by a call to the congregation to confirm it.

For what it's worth, despite my having told four consecutive people nicely that I was a former JW and had no intention of coming back, and to put me on the list, and having called the Kingdom Hall twice, it was over two years at my current address before people quit coming. *knock wood*
I have noticed that telling them that they kicked me out a while back makes them go "uhm.. ok" and run away in a panic.

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Old 06-20-2008, 01:24 AM
 
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I'm one of those people that don't mind chatting with the JW at the door. Which is why they keep coming back (much to my husband's annoyance).

BUT, I did notice this sign on my neighbour's door. The message was typed out in an attractive, bold font on white paper. The sign has been on their front door for several years and from what I see (they are across from us), they are not bothered with JW or anyone else.

The message is:

Please no solicitors. Do not try to sell us anything. And if you want to convert us to your religion, sorry, do not bother. We are quite happy the way things are. Thank you.
----

I think I may try this as well

Grace I will be interested to know after all your efforts if they are going to stop coming by
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Old 06-20-2008, 04:37 PM
 
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We are muslim, which some JW's know a little about and others don't, so when they come to our house, we tell them about our beliefs and that we love Jesus too, so that usually starts a conversation where we turn it around on them. Most sorta turn away after that and leave us alone.
I think they must focus on "easy prey" like athiests/agnostics instead of trying to convert devout believers.

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Old 06-20-2008, 04:42 PM
 
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We are muslim, which some JW's know a little about and others don't, so when they come to our house, we tell them about our beliefs and that we love Jesus too, so that usually starts a conversation where we turn it around on them. Most sorta turn away after that and leave us alone.
I think they must focus on "easy prey" like athiests/agnostics instead of trying to convert devout believers.
Why on earth would atheists/agnostics be considered "easy prey"?

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Old 06-20-2008, 11:43 PM
 
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Why on earth would atheists/agnostics be considered "easy prey"?
ditto...

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Old 06-21-2008, 12:14 AM
 
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Then, there was the former co-worker who (after about six months of monthly Saturday morning visits and polite requests to be removed from their call list) answered the door in the nude. He lived in that same apartment for 3 1/2 more years without another visit ... though I'm not sure the poor women who were calling on him that morning would have dubbed his approach "polite."
vickjul, oh but it sounds like you worked with my father, a long time ago. Because that's exactly what he ended up doing in exactly the same situation ... I wouldn't recommend it, but he says it worked!

I have "No Soliciting" sign. It's ugly, but it helps tremendously.

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Old 06-21-2008, 02:04 AM
 
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Well If I were trying to convert someone (which I would NEVER) I would think it would be easier to convert someone who doesn't believe in God or isn't sure rather than convert someone who is devout in their religion already. Make sense? I guess I could see it from the other way also. I don't really know, I've never thought of converting anyone.
I wonder what the success rate for these door-to-door conversions is?

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Old 06-21-2008, 01:33 PM
 
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Well If I were trying to convert someone (which I would NEVER) I would think it would be easier to convert someone who doesn't believe in God or isn't sure rather than convert someone who is devout in their religion already. Make sense? I guess I could see it from the other way also. I don't really know, I've never thought of converting anyone.
I wonder what the success rate for these door-to-door conversions is?
this assumes that atheists arent sure in their beliefs, which is really not a good assumption or a true one.

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Old 06-21-2008, 01:57 PM
 
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ETA: It's not about bothering people who are busy to tell them they are wrong. Some have suggested that it's perfectly acceptable to be rude to people who come door to door...but if the tables were turned and someone treated you like crap because you wanted to tell them about breastfeeding, or no circ, or vaccines, or [insert thing you sincerely believe in and care deeply about] you'd probably be offended. Like I said, I can't speak for how the JWs do it, but LDS missionaries give up 1.5-2 years of their life, on their own dime to volunteer full time (and it's not all going door to door, they spend a lot of time just doing service for people). They don't do it to annoy you, or to bash you, or to interrupt you're busy life. They do it to share something that is important to them and has made them happy. I think acting like they don't deserve to be treated with as much respect as anyone else because you happen to be in the middle of something when they come by is a mean attitude. Some posters seem to think missionaries deserve to be treated like dirt and I think that's ridiculous. No one deserves to be treated like dirt for simply asking if you'd like to talk to them about something very dear to their hearts. Like I said, if someone was nasty to you just for trying to talk to them about your beliefs/thoughts/opinions/whatever I imagine you'd be pretty ticked off.
Um, no. If I were rude enough to go around interrupting people's lives to deliver my unasked for opinions, I'd pretty well expect them to be nasty to me.

I don't much care that the JWs or LDSs or whomever are doing this because THEY think it's the right thing to do. They can care for my soul all they want, but leave me the hell out of it. Their religious obligations to spread their beliefs don't trump my own rights to be left alone, and if they come to MY door, unasked for, I'm under no obligation at all to be polite. I think what they're doing is incredibly rude and obnoxious. Maybe if they showed any interest in discussing MY religion too, I'd think it less obnoxious, but as was already noted, they clearly refuse to take literature from those they try to foist their own literature on, have no interest in sitting and listening to MY beliefs, etc. Why on earth should they expect me to extend them courtesies they're unwilling to extend back to me, IN MY OWN HOUSE?

I never asked them to give up any years of their own lives - they chose to do that. I never asked them to share what makes them happy, and I don't care if THEY don't feel it's an interruption or intrusion in my life because it's their calling - once they come to MY house, unasked for, they lose the right to expect the polite responses I might have for people I voluntarily entered into discussions with.
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Old 06-21-2008, 02:39 PM
 
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Well the JWs just came by, surprisingly it was two young men this time. I have only seen the old ladies before.
Also surprising, they did not run screaming when I said we were atheist. Rather, they wanted to know what my explanation was for pretty much every culture worldwide having a flood story.
We had a pleasant chat, interrupted by Gavin getting ahold of the remote and turning the TV to max volume.
We'll see if they come back.
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Old 06-21-2008, 03:48 PM
 
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Well If I were trying to convert someone (which I would NEVER) I would think it would be easier to convert someone who doesn't believe in God or isn't sure rather than convert someone who is devout in their religion already. Make sense? I guess I could see it from the other way also. I don't really know, I've never thought of converting anyone.
I wonder what the success rate for these door-to-door conversions is?
Every atheist I've ever met was very secure in his/her beliefs. I can't imagine any of them being converted to a belief that involves a deity.

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Old 06-21-2008, 04:07 PM
 
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Well If I were trying to convert someone (which I would NEVER) I would think it would be easier to convert someone who doesn't believe in God or isn't sure rather than convert someone who is devout in their religion already. Make sense? I guess I could see it from the other way also. I don't really know, I've never thought of converting anyone.
I wonder what the success rate for these door-to-door conversions is?
Actually, no, when I was a JW we feared unbelievers the most. Why? Because to a JW the bible is the authority on all things. Any question or concern is answered with the bible. Every teaching or argument presented was backed up with the bible. If you got someone at a door who didn't believe in the bible or god, your entire presentation fell flat. Every argument you were taught to prove your points could not be used, because suddenly you could not point to the bible as the one true authority on all matters. Atheists and agnostics were generally very educated on subjects that many JW's were not even allowed to learn about in high school, such as evolution or philosophy. JW's have a view on science that is very incomplete, and meeting atheists or agnostics at the door who were very knowledgable on the subject was extremely intimidating and scary. Scary because they asked questions that we couldn't answer, and because they questioned even our own "science" book called: "Life - How Did it Get Here? By Evolution or Creation", which has rampant misquotes and errors, which they were happy to point out. Most atheists/agnostics we met were very firm in their beliefs and were not searching for anything else, especially not a deity to follow, especially not one in a fundamentalist religion that threw the science they believed out the window. The people who were "easy" to convert were the poor, the emigrant groups, or people who had just had a trauma in their lives such as a death in the family. Also, people who needed and longed for community, such as single mothers, or people who didn't fit in well with their own church. People who believed in god, and the bible, give JW's a common ground to work with. Even emigrant groups who believed in some kind of religion were easier to convert then atheists or agnostics.
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Old 06-21-2008, 04:49 PM
 
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I think it would be way easier to get someone who believed in a god to switch religions than to get someone who does not believe in a god to believe in a god.

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Old 06-21-2008, 06:03 PM
 
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I did not read the whole thread...but Smokering, your post on the first page had me cracking up (gotta love being able to pull out the Calvinist bit ...too bad they didn't stick around to hear the Confessions LOL!).

I've had both good and bad experiences with JW's. We're related to one that is very dear to us...none of us bring up our differences though...that is how we maintain the peace Another time I had an old ba..lady at my friend's door and I know a bit about Greek. She got peeved at me and started snarking off at me. And then we've recently had some young girls driven by a group of people and they started in on the homeschooling bit (very pro). I let them get their starting piece in. When they tried to hand me their papers I kindly told them that we already know their beliefs, our beliefs are very contrary to theirs, but we thank them for coming by, and told them that they would be better to keep their papers as we won't read them and they would just be round filed. They thanked us for being kind and went on their way.

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Old 06-21-2008, 10:29 PM
 
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Actually, no, when I was a JW we feared unbelievers the most. Why? Because to a JW the bible is the authority on all things. Any question or concern is answered with the bible. Every teaching or argument presented was backed up with the bible. If you got someone at a door who didn't believe in the bible or god, your entire presentation fell flat. Every argument you were taught to prove your points could not be used, because suddenly you could not point to the bible as the one true authority on all matters.
Yep that. Someone that at least entertains the notion of God being reality, would be far easier to sway to your particular version of religion (the general your here sorry). I usually just say no thank you & shut the door.. but on the few occasions I offered them a drink of cold water on a hot day etc, they realized the bible really didn't hold much sway with me at all (I'm pagan )

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Old 06-23-2008, 07:45 PM
 
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I've only had JW's visit twice since I moved here (been here about 5 years now). Once I wasnt home, so they left stuff outside that door. The second time I was in a horribly bad mood and while I wasnt rude, I just said flat out I was an athiest and wasnt interested in hearing it, and shut the door. I'm not really an athiest either...that just seemed easier than saying I was a unitarian with buddhist tendencies

For us its the LDS that visit all the time! I dont mind too much as they are always nice and arnt pushy at all when I say I'm not interested...and I'm pretty sure they are different guys each time. They also ALWAYS ask if I need help with anything...dh said I should take advantage of this and get the dishes done, but I wouldnt do that. Well, I mean, I might if I were on bedrest or something, but I'm perfectly capable of doing them myself right now, tyvm.

I've also known one JW who I had no clue even was until she mentioned it in passing one day. She never said a word about it and I really respected her for it-she knew my beliefs before I knew hers and she didnt try to push stuff on me like some people I've met. On the same hand, I've known a LOT of LDS' in real life and had some great friends that were as well, and again, they never once pressured me into their religion. I did go to church one time with one family though and um...got myself into trouble. What can I say, I was a 17 year old from a VERY liberal household who had a hard time keeping my mouth shut when I should, lol.

Anyway, I do agree its rude to keep bugging people when they've said hey, I'm not interested, but at the same time, it doesnt bother me so much having someone come by once, ask if I have any questions, and then leave me alone. Of course, everyone has their own take on this...and there are times where I definately am NOT amused at uninvited guests. But I'd be more upset to see my mom at my door unannounced than a religious group (of course, my mom is scary, for reals).

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Old 06-24-2008, 03:12 PM
 
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I just talked to Dh the other day about this thread, and he reminded me that, as we've established, a "no soliciting" sign will only work for a handful of witnesses, but, a "no trespassing" sign will stop most JW's in their tracks. See, some years back, the Watchtower Society started saying that if fines were incurred from trespassing when a no trespassing sign was posted, they would not pay those fines. So, most witnesses will not cross a "no trespassing" sign. The Watchtower Society still maintains that soliciting does not apply to them, and they teach their members their own little definition of soliciting.
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Old 06-24-2008, 06:58 PM
 
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I have no idea how JW's define soliciting, and the definition they give may be wrong, but they are correct that they are not doing it. To solicit does not require an exchange of money. It is, in a nutshell, to ask for something or to try to get someone to do something, usually in a beseeching or persistent fashion. This can be asking someone for money, trying to get someone to buy something or trying to get someone to do something (sign a petition, attend a rally, vote for them, commit a crime, whatever). So long as the JW's only give things away and do not take money or anything else (probably one reason they are not allowed to take other people's literature, thought probably not the only reason or even the most important one), and do not try to get you to take some sort of action, then they are not soliciting. They may be incredibly annoying, they may be trespassing, they may be harassing you, but they are not soliciting.

Note: I am not a JW or former JW. I am an English major and the daughter of a lawyer and I care deeply about words and how they are used.

Adele geek.gif, Mommy to Adelia hearts.gif7/31/2000, wife to Rod fuzmalesling.gif, and co-owner of Max dog2.gif
 
 
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