I'm emotional about starting solids. Am I alone? - Mothering Forums

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Old 03-07-2010, 04:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I often feel like writing a breastfeeding autobiography because it was such an extreme struggle for me to adjust to breastfeeding (mostly due to severe pain but also early questions about weight gain). I also have dysphoric milk ejection reflex that has improved over time.

But I love breastfeeding. I love how my baby and I are this pair and I love giving her everything she needs through me and seeing her blossom through this process. I get kind of weepy when I think about how in the next few days, we're going to be doing what she has been wanting for a good 6 weeks (she's 6.5 months) and letting her try a little food.

Food just seems so complicated, and a lot of the times I feel like I'm barely managing as it is. Adding another factor in--having to cook for a baby--is overwhelming to me.

But mostly I feel grief around the idea of her not relying solely on breastmilk anymore. I know it's kind of weird. I just wondered if anyone else had gone through this, and how you got to a more celebratory frame of mind about this big milestone.


Mama to a bilingual (Arabic/English) and cuddly 3 year old, and planning another peaceful homebirth in June.
 

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Old 03-07-2010, 04:52 PM
 
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I felt exactly the same way and I think it's totally normal, mama. Those of us who struggled to breastfeed seem to appreciate that bond the most.
I tried to be low key about solids, researched Baby Led Weaning (and combined it with some spoonfeeding) and tried to take the same joy in my babe exploring foods as I did in everything else he was discovering for the first time.
I really don't think you need to cook for baby, either. If you want to do the puree thing, you can mash or use the food processor on things you're eating - cooked meat, fish or chicken, cooked veggies or sweet potato, ripe avocado or fruit, yogurt. The BLW approach is even easier.

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Old 03-07-2010, 06:12 PM
 
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I never had issues/problems with bfing but I am sad to think that time is coming. This is my 3rd (and surely last) and I don't want her growing up so quickly. She is not quite 4 months, so we have got a couple months.... but she has been really eyeing me eating of late. DS2 did that and had grabbed a cookie from my hand and stuffed it in his mouth as his first food at just under 6 months!

I 2nd not cooking for baby...
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Old 03-07-2010, 07:44 PM
 
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I definitely can relate to feeling sad at the prospect of the end of EBF. As it is, my DS is 7.5 months and has only tasted a few things. I thought he seemed more interested in solids at the time but it turns out he isn't very interested after all. I think once I let him have a taste of solid food it allowed me to accept it a lot better. Now I don't feel too sad because he still BFs all of the time.

I still let him have tastes of certain foods from time to time, but there's no rush on our end.
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Old 03-07-2010, 07:50 PM
 
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I was. Then she refused solids for a good long time, giving me much longer than expected as EBF.

Twin boys (2/05) and little sister (10/07)
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Old 03-07-2010, 07:57 PM
 
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I thought I was alone in this as well. It was much harder this time around. My second still eats only a SMALL handful of food and he just turned 2. I think it is normal.

Living DAIRY AND GLUTEN FREE for my SPD and Aspergers Little Man.
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Old 03-07-2010, 08:01 PM
 
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I struggled with starting solids for a while, so we "started" at 9 months

I felt exactly as you did, about losing that exclusive relationship and being her sole source of nourishment. If it is an issue, I would recommend holding off if you feel comfortable with it

Sarah. Wife to Pearry, mama to Pearry II and Isabella Rose, born Breech at home and Benjamin, our January 1st bebe intactlact.gifhomebirth.jpg

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Old 03-07-2010, 08:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Wow--thank you all for replying! I feel so much less alone about this now! Makes it easier to move forward.


Mama to a bilingual (Arabic/English) and cuddly 3 year old, and planning another peaceful homebirth in June.
 

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Old 03-08-2010, 02:17 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sky_and_lavender View Post
Food just seems so complicated, and a lot of the times I feel like I'm barely managing as it is. Adding another factor in--having to cook for a baby--is overwhelming to me.

But mostly I feel grief around the idea of her not relying solely on breastmilk anymore.
This. I could have written this part! This is exactly how I have been feeling, too.

Food is also...MESSY!!! I don't have time or energy to clean up her whole little body from HAIR to TOES when she has smeared herself with banana (that she squished in her hands while trying to BLW!!!) She practically gave herself a banana mohawk the other day. So I went and bought a bag of whole grain brown rice puffs. They are dry!

What gets me is that I feel like once I introduce foods on a semi-regular basis, I will *always* have to do it, because she will want it, expect it. But it feels like extra work, extra shopping/planning. Then I feel guilty because, gee, if my child *wants* food, who am I to deny her? Gah!

And THEN I hear about people who give their kids things just off their plates which sounds o-so-easy, and I wonder how, because everything I seem to read says (for example) no wheat, no egg white, no cow milk, etc, and the stories I hear include things like yogurt, bread, nut butters, pasta, meats.....SO CONFUSING. It's just EASIER to BF!!! Maybe I am being a lazy mama, though. Or overly cautious. I have a baby "cookbook" with food info in the first chapter. I guess I need to start reading.

Everyone tells me I should be spooning food into my DD, but I just tell them she eat's at Mom's Diner. Then they give me a weird look and repeat their original statement.

OP, I hear ya. You are not alone! BFing is just so simple and sweet. Lately my DD has been nursing for only super short sessions and I worry it's because I've been giving her solids.

Mama to Fenergy.gif(06/11/09) and baby boy C baby.gif (06/09/11) 

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Old 03-08-2010, 02:52 AM
 
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We are coming up on that soon as well.

It's a mixture of awe and pride whenever I hold my son and realize that everything he is came from me. Each eyelash, tear, and tiny fingernail passed through my body somehow. Each cell in his body is fueled by me. It is amazing.

Breastfeeding, in some ways is like an extension of pregnancy. When he was born, his independence from me increased, my ability to protect him and provide for him diminished. It's the same in a way, when you start solids. And that is life. Pretty soon he'll be asking for a car!

Texmati-- Knitter, Hindu, vegetarian, WOHM. Wife to superdadsuperhero.gif and mom to DS babyf.gif24 months, and DD boc.gif 8 months! .

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Old 03-08-2010, 03:12 AM
 
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Beauchamp: I felt exactly the same way with DD. Now at nearly two I wish she'd BF less and eat more.

If decomposition persists please see your necromancer.

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Old 03-08-2010, 03:23 AM
 
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yup, feeling that way too. also feeling proud that all he is, was my body's doing. not anxious to start solids, but he also grabbed a cookie out of my hand and tried to eat it today. he turns six months old in about an hour and a half!

i have the book Baby Led Weaning from the library. guess i should start reading it!

one suggestion to the person who said her baby is nursing only short sessions, definitely breastfeed *before* you give any solids "meal". (the doctor may tell you otherwise, but as you know breastmilk is much more nutritous than "rice cereal", so you want him to fill up on the good stuff. the first solids are just for the "experience" of eating, anyway.

i'm going to spoon feed him a little bit just to give him a taste, then after that, food will be put on his high chair tray while the rest of us eat, and he can decide if and how to stuff it in his own mouth.

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Old 03-08-2010, 03:31 AM
 
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me, too. this is our last unless we adopt and it's been tough.

Jen-loving Bill, mama to Teryn 18, Kalyn 16, Ricky 13, Natalie 5, Angel Zoe '07 and rainbow1284.gifAmelia Rae 22 mos bonus kids (dss) W 14, W 13 NEW grandbaby due 10/10/11

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Old 03-08-2010, 11:41 AM
 
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oh my goodness! I felt exactly the same way.

I actually felt like a bad mama for being so hesitant...of course every baby is different, but our LO was showing signs of being ready early. I waited until she was six months (this was about 2 weeks ago) to try, and she was so excited! She lunged for the spoon- and had no issues with tongue-thrust. Definite case of mama being cautious and hesistant and baby ready to move on.

I feel like I went through some kind of "mourning" over the whole thing. But now I really look forward to feeding time (she only gets one "meal," following our evening nursing-session), and to introducing new things. She clearly loves eating and although i'm sad she's growing up so fast, she's getting to be so interactive that i love spending time with her and seeing what she's going to do next!

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