Silly things you've been told about breastfeeding - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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Old 02-13-2012, 10:24 AM
 
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These are startling and insightful!

 

I haven't nursed before but I am looking forward to nursing with my first child once s/he is born.  I plan on nursing for 2 years, or when the child weans naturally.  Some of these comments are enlightening.  Wow.  Thanks for sharing! 


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Old 02-13-2012, 10:58 AM
 
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My father, that grew up near dairy farms, told me that I needed to wean as the cows needed humans to drink their milk or they will explode!


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Old 02-13-2012, 11:21 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chel View Post

My father, that grew up near dairy farms, told me that I needed to wean as the cows needed humans to drink their milk or they will explode!



ROTFLMAO.giflol.gif  happytears.gif

 

awesome.


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Old 02-13-2012, 11:34 AM
 
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Originally Posted by cat13 View Post

I was told to "rough up" my nipples while I was pregnant to get them used to being nursed on. I guess that kind of advice was pretty common in my mother's generation.


My mom told me this one as well.  Luckily, my Doula had told me it was an old wive's tale (and I had read "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding").  I was fortunate to that DS had a good latch from day 1, and I never had any pain with BFing.  When I told some friends (who had had babies within a month of DS) that it never hurt to nurse, one of them looked at me and said "What kinky things was your husband doing to your nipples before you had D"? ROTFLMAO.gif
 

 


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Old 02-13-2012, 01:09 PM
 
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Originally Posted by bookwise View Post



same here! my ob said it right in the middle of examining me during one of monthly pregnancy visits - she grabbed one of my nipples and, i don't know any other words, kinda *plucked* at it and then *kneaded* it, like bread.. and then did it again. i was shocked and embarrassed. the next month, i asked her not to do that, a bit shyly, but still please don't do that. she did it again, laughing me off.

 

i switched obs that week, had my homebirth baby a few months later, and besides the normal adjustments one makes when first breastfeeding (yeah, it hurt a little! but i'm sure that had nothing to do with my non-roughed-up nipples), we were breastfeeding without problems by week 9. still going strong at 10 months tomorrow! so there, doc! pffffffffft! :P


*shivers* Even after you asked her not to touch you like that, she laughed and continued... yuck! I'm so glad you found a new care provider, and congrats on 10 months and counting!

 

 

 


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Old 02-13-2012, 01:28 PM
 
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Yipes! I was also told to rough up my nipples.

 

My kids are all older now, but in conversation the other day, my sister in law told me that her ex's son was gay now, and no wonder.  His mother breastfed him until he was four.  I assured her that one had nothing to do with the other. She balked, and another of our friends chimed in, saying that it was well known that breastfeeding boys causes homosexuality.

 

Oh boy. redface.gif


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Old 02-13-2012, 02:34 PM
 
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Wow... SIL will be upset to find out my brother is gay because he was BF'd. Especially since she's BFing their twin boys!

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Old 02-13-2012, 08:44 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Alphaghetti View Post

Yipes! I was also told to rough up my nipples.

 

My kids are all older now, but in conversation the other day, my sister in law told me that her ex's son was gay now, and no wonder.  His mother breastfed him until he was four.  I assured her that one had nothing to do with the other. She balked, and another of our friends chimed in, saying that it was well known that breastfeeding boys causes homosexuality.

 

Oh boy. redface.gif



HA! ROTFLMAO.gif

How did our species reproduce before we invented bottles!? Every man on earth must have been gay! How horrible that they were all forced to reproduce with women just to continue the species...

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Old 02-17-2012, 03:02 PM
 
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My little guy was 10 lbs 4 oz at birth and by day three was back at his birth weight (thank you placenta smoothie!) and at 5.5 months he's a healthy 25lbs. When people find out he's EBF I sometimes get "Are you sure he's getting enough?". My biceps say yes.


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Old 02-17-2012, 04:48 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cat13 View Post

I was told to "rough up" my nipples while I was pregnant to get them used to being nursed on. I guess that kind of advice was pretty common in my mother's generation.



My husband's customer told him to tell that "advice" too. I was like, "I-don't-think-so..."


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Old 02-17-2012, 04:54 PM
 
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I had a baby shower when DD was 8 weeks old and I went into another room with an arm chair to nurse and my husband's aunt looked at me and said, "you are still  nursing her?"

 

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Ummmm.....YES!!!!!


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Old 02-17-2012, 06:06 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mareseatoats View Post

My little guy was 10 lbs 4 oz at birth and by day three was back at his birth weight (thank you placenta smoothie!) and at 5.5 months he's a healthy 25lbs. When people find out he's EBF I sometimes get "Are you sure he's getting enough?". My biceps say yes.


So funny that with big babies people are always concerned that they aren't getting enough with EBF...If you didn't have enough milk, he wouldn't have gotten to that size in the first place!

 

Mamma, you must be making cream! thumb.gif My DS is 19 mos and weighs 24lbs! lol. 

 


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Old 02-18-2012, 05:55 PM
 
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Just last night DH "informed" me that breastmilk was very nutritious...for the first year.  But after that it somehow looses it's nutritious value?  shrug.gif  wink1.gif

DD's pediatrician told me it was critical that I stop bfing when I let her know I was pg...and I listened.  greensad.gif  I weaned her at 12mo, 2wks.

SIL stopped bfing at 1wk because she said her son "didn't like her milk."  eyesroll.gif


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Old 02-20-2012, 11:37 AM
 
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Katielady and blackbird2 - your stories cracked me up!!!  I was also told to cut the middle of the night feedings because "he doesn't need it" - wonder if the ped would appreciate me coming in and taking half his lunch away because he really doesn't "need" it!  I think I'll let my babe be the judge of that, thanks winky.gif

 

It was also hilarious because starting at 4 months they started giving us the list of solids to start...and every two months, still hadn't started a single one!  Now, at 10 months, he dabbles in a few bites here and there but that's it.  DS was always a super chunk so there was little to argue about - actually, a couple ladies at church said he must be breastfed because he was so big! biggrinbounce.gif

 

I can completely relate to the sadness over misinformation...my own mother only breastfed my sister and I for 3 months - she said I was "colicky" and spitting up alot - the doctors told her to switch me to formula, then to soy, etc.  When DS was a few months old, he was having trouble with reflux, diarrhea, intestinal issues of all sorts and even breathing problems at night - the doctors advised propping up his bassinet mattress, gave him nasty liquid Zantac and nothing helped. I almost gave up and switched to formula, just like my mom.  

 

Turns out, after a little research, I had foremilk/hindmilk imbalance and overactive let down issues.  I was producing so much milk that switching breasts as often as they told me to (every 15 min.) was still only filling his tiny tummy with foremilk - all the sugar, but none of the substance.  He would nurse more because he was in pain, contributing to more oversupply.  Block feeding (one breast for hours, if needed, until empty) and co-sleeping COMPLETELY solved our problems!

 

So that was a long story to say, my mom realized she likely had the same issues and gave up due to bad advice.  shake.gif  Meanwhile, DS and I are going strong @ 10 months!


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Old 02-20-2012, 06:19 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by azhie View Post

Relatives and friends looked pointedly at my chest and said, "You won't have enough milk. Chinese women rarely have enough milk." 

 

 


I heard the opposite!  People would look at my breasts when I was pregnant and joke "well, you're going to make lots and lots of milk, aren't you?"  I swear, suddenly my boobs were a big point of conversation (and I wasn't even breastfeeding yet, so it's not like they saw me feeding a baby and made that comment).

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by dakotablue View Post



I'm sorry,

 

But Yeah don't tell her. White lie, doctor said I'm good. My grandmother didn't breastfeed after her 1st because one day her milk dryed up and she was told she just couldn't breastfeed so the next two were condensed milk/ corn syrup babies. A little prodding...Yeah her milk did dry up but because of pregnancy with my uncle. There's no point in telling her now, it would just make her feel bad.

 

But BOY it makes me mad at those stupid doctors. splat.gif


My grandmother was a public health nurse and a BIG advocate of breastfeeding when it wasn't popular (and she still is a huge advocate...I'm lucky to have so many men and women in my family who are strong breastfeeding supporters), but when my dad (her youngest) was born, she was told not to breastfeed him because of an infection she had and the doctor told her that she couldn't feed him.  She didn't, and STILL talks about how bad she feels about it.  Now, I don't know exactly what the issue was, but I'm betting she probably could have still breastfed my dad.  But she really had it drilled into her head that the doctor knows best, and you can't contradict the doctor, must follow his orders, and did exactly what she was told to do.  So I know how you feel!  And yeah, your grandmother probably would feel bad.  Mine does, 50 years later!

 

And like a few other people on this thread, I got the "You're still making enough milk?!" comment, probably at about four weeks or so.  DD is off the charts for her weight, and has been pretty much as soon as she started gaining weight...I think she's getting enough.  wink1.gif

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Old 02-21-2012, 04:47 AM
 
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If he can ask for it, you need to wean.

 

Like he hasn't been asking for the boob since day 1??

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Old 02-21-2012, 05:26 AM
 
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my baby girl is 6 weeks old and very refluxy. was told by a woman in a cafe that its cuz my nipple must be too big for the baby's mouth so she s not latching on properly. eyesroll.gif ummm seriously? she must be imagining one monster of a nipple.

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Old 02-21-2012, 05:48 AM
 
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My husbands grandmother ( who formula fed all 7of her kids) got into an argument with me when my daughter was 3 months about how inappropriate it was to nurse her in public. I defended my right to feed my newborn where ever and when ever ( I usually just closed my mouth when she told me something stupid, trying to be respectful) and I didn't back down, no matter how many times or different ways she tried to say it. She finally ended up banging her fists on the table, screaming "it's just like having sex in public!".uhoh3.gif I really had no response, I just shook my head and continued nursing my baby.

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Old 02-21-2012, 07:02 AM
 
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When my son was 5 months old, I had a number of people inform me that I would "dry up" at six months and to enjoy that last month while I can.  It is impossible to breastfeed past 6 months.  My son still nurses now, at 17 months.  Not sure what though since my milk dried up 11 months ago, right?  ;)

 

My parents are bitterly divorced and one day my father critisized my mother for nursing me a little over a year.  I told him I planned on nursing my son for at least two years.  He kind of sputtered, then told me I can't because it would make my son too attached to me!  Funny thing about my father is that he also took issue with my son sleeping in the same room, but he's raising my nephew and, at two years old, he still sleeps in their room. (My stepmom is awesomely supportive of these things and trumps him on such issues...you'd think after raising 8 children by two women that share attachment-style parenting that he'd know better at this point.)

 

My son's initial ped didn't understand at first that he was solely breastfeed.  At around 2 months we were in for a wellness visit and my son was very fuss.  The ped kept asking that I give him a pacifier or a bottle.  I kept telling him I didn't have any, he was only breastfed.  He left the room to get something and when he came back, I was nursing.  He excused himself and gave us a little time to finish.  When he returned, he was shocked and delighted.  He had finially got it that we weren't using bottles or pacifiers!  He was utterly delighted and supportive, but it was really sad that he have never in his years of practice came across a baby that solely nursed at 2 months.

 

 

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Old 02-21-2012, 07:27 AM
 
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I haven't gotten too many,but the few I've had were trying ti tell me that my less than 1 month old should be on a 3 hour schedule. I asked-who is going to explain this to my son,that he will have to wait 3 hours to "eat" again? Also,the nurse,on the last visit to our home (I live in Denmark where we have a nurse who visits to check on the baby every few weeks),she tried to explain that to -bf whenever my son wanted it was hard on his system-that for him to be digesting my milk constantly all day was too difficult for him. She said that it would be like if she drank whole milk all day long and had to digest it. So weird, especially since I'm thinking most people are digesting some kind of food all day long-I mean,I certainly don't let myself go hungry because digesting is too hard on my system. Also,to compare a baby drinking mother's milk to an adult drinking cow's milk is so messed up! I thought,how could a medical person think this? But then I read some of your responses and understand more.

Separate comment made to me by that same nurse- she told me I shouldn't let my son sleep in our bed because,in a year,we'll have to fight to get him out of our bed and into his own. I thought,w that argument, then I shouldn't be breastfeeding since I'll have wean him off of that! I'm just so glad I did a lot of research into how I want to raise my son,before he was born,or some of these comments could really mess w me.

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Old 02-21-2012, 08:13 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hymanroth

 

and my husbands sister and mother pleaded with me to pump my milk instead of breastfeed b/c I would have no life and I need to get away. Umm.. I love being with my son :D lol joy.gif

 

 


I get subtle versions of this - "I'll give him a bottle while you (sleep, go out, etc)."  I work full time.  My "life" is when I am with my son. 

 


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Old 02-21-2012, 08:15 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Alphaghetti View Post

Yipes! I was also told to rough up my nipples.

 

My kids are all older now, but in conversation the other day, my sister in law told me that her ex's son was gay now, and no wonder.  His mother breastfed him until he was four.  I assured her that one had nothing to do with the other. She balked, and another of our friends chimed in, saying that it was well known that breastfeeding boys causes homosexuality.

 

Oh boy. redface.gif



If this were true,then I would be the proud mother of a wonderful gay boy! haha!

Seeing that, once upon a time, everyone had to be EBF since there were no grocery stores stocked w formula,(AND BFed longer than a few months-most of the time for a number of years,actually) and the human race is still going strong,I'm thinking that BFing does not make boys gay,or else no one would have been getting pregnant all these centuries!

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Old 02-21-2012, 08:44 AM
 
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I love this thread!  So funny and at the same time very sad. 

When pregnant I was asked by my mother how long I planned to BF.  I thought she would be shocked if I told her the truth - possibly as long as six years! - so, I simply said I was hoping that it would be at least 12 months.  She was still incredulous and exclaimed "but Carrie, you do realize that 12 months is a whole year!!". 

When my DD was 4 months old I was stopped, at Costco, by a busybody who felt it her duty to tell me that I should be ashamed of myself for overfeeding my baby and that I should take her immediately to the doctor to see about getting her formula changed.  The look on her face was quite gratifying when I informed her that she had never had formula... her roundness was all breastmilk and that she was exactly the size nature intended her to be.  It turned into a real feel good moment for me as a man in the same aisle gave me a small cheer and said "you tell her!".  The woman took off in a huff.

I've also had lots of comments from my parents about the feeding on demand.  Mum was big on the 2 hour schedule and not wanting me to nurse whenever the baby looked for it for fear of spoiling her.  I had to insist, on more than one occasion, that she hand me back the baby so I could nurse her!

And because she often spit up after feeding and was so chubby (20lbs at 4mths) they kept pleading with me to feed her less, as she was obviously in pain.  I couldn't believe they would say that when this baby very rarely cried or fussed in anyway and was constantly laughing and cooing.

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Old 02-21-2012, 08:55 AM
 
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Originally Posted by kiramadera View Post

If he can ask for it, you need to wean.

 

Like he hasn't been asking for the boob since day 1??


YES! I got this A LOT from my mom and sisters. They thought it was ridiculous that my DS could ask for milk and I would still BF him. I always asked what the difference was between crying for it and asking for it and they never really had an answer for that. 

I'm hoping that having stuck to my guns the first time, I wont have as many stupid comments and questions the second time around...we'll see.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Carriebird View Post

I love this thread!  So funny and at the same time very sad. 

When pregnant I was asked by my mother how long I planned to BF.  I thought she would be shocked if I told her the truth - possibly as long as six years! - so, I simply said I was hoping that it would be at least 12 months.  She was still incredulous and exclaimed "but Carrie, you do realize that 12 months is a whole year!!". 

When my DD was 4 months old I was stopped, at Costco, by a busybody who felt it her duty to tell me that I should be ashamed of myself for overfeeding my baby and that I should take her immediately to the doctor to see about getting her formula changed.  The look on her face was quite gratifying when I informed her that she had never had formula... her roundness was all breastmilk and that she was exactly the size nature intended her to be.  It turned into a real feel good moment for me as a man in the same aisle gave me a small cheer and said "you tell her!".  The woman took off in a huff.

I've also had lots of comments from my parents about the feeding on demand.  Mum was big on the 2 hour schedule and not wanting me to nurse whenever the baby looked for it for fear of spoiling her.  I had to insist, on more than one occasion, that she hand me back the baby so I could nurse her!

And because she often spit up after feeding and was so chubby (20lbs at 4mths) they kept pleading with me to feed her less, as she was obviously in pain.  I couldn't believe they would say that when this baby very rarely cried or fussed in anyway and was constantly laughing and cooing.


Your baby sounds like an absolute delight! Chubby, round, always laughing and cooing and hardly ever fussing or crying! I don't know how anyone could find anything to complain about!

 

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Old 02-21-2012, 09:48 AM
 
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Originally Posted by amymccabe View Post

My son's initial ped didn't understand at first that he was solely breastfeed.  At around 2 months we were in for a wellness visit and my son was very fuss.  The ped kept asking that I give him a pacifier or a bottle.  I kept telling him I didn't have any, he was only breastfed.  He left the room to get something and when he came back, I was nursing.  He excused himself and gave us a little time to finish.  When he returned, he was shocked and delighted.  He had finially got it that we weren't using bottles or pacifiers!  He was utterly delighted and supportive, but it was really sad that he have never in his years of practice came across a baby that solely nursed at 2 months.

 


I find this really sad. My DD never had pacifiers or bottles, luckily most people didn't think we were aliens because of it. 

Amazing that the human species has survived the last 4 million years without pacifiers, bottles, even grocery stores. It's only in the last hundred that these things became the "normal" and breastfeeding became the "abnormal" abboration. Scary how fast that happened, isn't it?

 

I'm really shocked about the woman who said BF in public is the same as sex in public. This is so warped that if she said it to me I'd just stand there in shock with my mouth hanging to the floor. 

 

Also, the gay comment seems to be popular, but makes no sense. Do they mean that breastfeeding is so grotesque that it turns boy babies off to breasts, and therefore women? What about girl babies, would it make them not become lesbian? I mean it is so insane, but I'm really trying to follow this crazy logic, but just can't seem to make the leap. I hope next time someone says that to them, they can ask, because I'd really like to know.

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Old 02-21-2012, 11:12 AM
 
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My husbands grandmother ( who formula fed all 7of her kids) got into an argument with me when my daughter was 3 months about how inappropriate it was to nurse her in public. I defended my right to feed my newborn where ever and when ever ( I usually just closed my mouth when she told me something stupid, trying to be respectful) and I didn't back down, no matter how many times or different ways she tried to say it. She finally ended up banging her fists on the table, screaming "it's just like having sex in public!".uhoh3.gif I really had no response, I just shook my head and continued nursing my baby.



Oh. My. huh.gif I feel for you having such an "interesting" MIL. 

 

And holy crap, what is with so many people out there having crazy opinons on breastfeeding!?! And thinking it is perfectly fine to voice them?!? 

 

I'm thinking a good response for the crazies would be to give them unwanted advice on their eating habits, health, or appearance. Or perhaps just stick with the peaceful approach I've adopted: "Why do you say that?" I've just started giving my public crazies a simple question, asking them to really explain their reasons. Yeah, most can't! But when it comes to healthcare professionals giving rotten advice? No idea. That's just sad!

 

 


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Old 02-21-2012, 11:36 AM
 
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I had to chuckle at the PPs mom who said that baby "didn't like her BM".  My mom weaned me at 3 months because "I didn't like nursing".  I can see why she thought that.  My DS also went through a very distractable stage at about 4 months, which is probably what I was going through, and it was a lot of work to get him to nurse because he was so interested in everything else.  We had to lay on the bed or floor in a quiet, dark room every time he had to eat.  But we got through that and at 19 months are still going strong.
 

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Originally Posted by sere234 View Post

But when it comes to healthcare professionals giving rotten advice? No idea. That's just sad!

 

 



Seems like they are often the worst because they feel most entitled to give their opinion and also because as a mom, you feel you should be able to trust what your doctor says!  It makes me angry that so many doctors and nurses are so mis-informed.

 

I realized my doctor didn't know what she was talking about when she discouraged me from BFing DS at night at 3 months because he "needed to consolidate his sleep" and it was bad for him to wake to nurse.  She confirmed it for me when we went in for his 6 month check up and she commented that I must have weaned because DS had teeth and obviously shake.gif would be biting me if we were still nursing.  (I did get niped a few times, but I think that she though you couldn't nurse once baby had teeth!)  She was also shocked when I refused to start DS on whole milk at 12 months because he was still nursing.  She was worried he "wouldn't get enough fat" from my milk. 

 


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Old 02-21-2012, 11:37 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sere234 View Post



Oh. My. huh.gif I feel for you having such an "interesting" MIL. 

 

And holy crap, what is with so many people out there having crazy opinons on breastfeeding!?! And thinking it is perfectly fine to voice them?!? 

 

I'm thinking a good response for the crazies would be to give them unwanted advice on their eating habits, health, or appearance. Or perhaps just stick with the peaceful approach I've adopted: "Why do you say that?" I've just started giving my public crazies a simple question, asking them to really explain their reasons. Yeah, most can't! But when it comes to healthcare professionals giving rotten advice? No idea. That's just sad!

 

 


Thank you, this is my new response!

 


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Old 02-21-2012, 12:17 PM
 
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in the ER with my baby who was probably under one.  middle of the night.  he was in the Ergo and i was pacing back and forth while nursing him, trying to get him to sleep while in the waiting room.  a woman who was in there with her kid said nice and loudly:  "breastfeeding in public should be illegal".  then she gave me a nice glare.  now, here is what she was wearing:  shorts that were short enough to be defined as boy-cut underwear and a VERY low-cut shirt with LOTS of cleavage showing.  i could see more of her breasts than what she could see of mine!  and i at least had the excuse of them being functional!

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Old 02-21-2012, 12:30 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Hymanroth View Post

 

My FIL once said that I should give him food b/c he is too hungry to be satisfied by BM ... ok. 

 

and my husbands sister and mother pleaded with me to pump my milk instead of breastfeed b/c I would have no life and I need to get away. Umm.. I love being with my son :D lol joy.gif


I have gotten these alot!!  People react as if EBFing is akin to starvation. eyesroll.gif  But, conversely, feeding on demand is also terrible somehow???  Riddle me that...

 

AND, like you, everyone is constantly on my case about leaving the baby, friends and family think I am so weird - that because I nurse and don't pump (SAHM) I am some kind of crazy martyr mother - but I don't WANT to 'get away'!  I wouldn't have planned him if I wanted to escape him!  Anywhere I go better welcome my baby kid, too. stillheart.gif  We take him everywhere, in a sling or carrier - I've discreetly breastfed him in his Ergo while giving a talk in front of our church, haha (this especially cracked DH up, as he was the only one who knew).  This phase will go by so quickly - I'll take my independence back as he establishes his - naturally.

 

I've learned to just politely stand my ground - they've tried to put him in the nursery at church with a bottle or pacifier and sent many people to talk to me about it.  Now, this is not because he creates any disturbance (if he makes a peep I take him to a back room) - he mostly sleeps or nurses (which nobody even knows he's doing - they always assume he's asleep and want to peek, haha).  They just think I'm crazy!!!  nut.gif  After many conversations I've realized they just can't see why I don't want to unload him somewhere...

 

 

 

 


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