I HATE nursing! - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 05-30-2014, 10:33 AM - Thread Starter
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I HATE nursing!

So I'm 23 weeks pregnant and have been dry nursing my 18 month old DD since my milk dried up around 14 weeks. It's been going good up until the last week. We nurse at naptime, bedtime, and in the early morning when waking up. Out of nowhere I've developed this agitation which I read can be common for pregnant moms as the body gears up to nurse a newborn. I feel like there are bugs crawling on me when we nurse and her touching me gives me the eeby jeebies, and I just want to scream, although there is no pain. I last about 5 seconds with her latched on before I can't stand it and it drives me UP THE WALL. I really was hoping to continue nursing through pregnancy and try tandem, but I feel I need to stop, but am feeling really guilty about even thinking so. Any advice on weaning or what to do? I am HATING this feeling and never thoughts Id have anything but happy, rainbow thoughts in regards to breastfeeding lol. Please help!
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#2 of 10 Old 05-30-2014, 10:46 AM - Thread Starter
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This isn't displaying in New posts so I'm just bumping
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#3 of 10 Old 05-30-2014, 08:09 PM - Thread Starter
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#4 of 10 Old 05-30-2014, 08:37 PM
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I don't really have any advice but I have had the same experience. It started while I was pregnant and has persisted. My second DD is 18mo now and I don't have it with her but I still do with DD1 :-( The only way I can feed her is to use distraction (for me). I either read a book or read something on my phone. Even then I can only last a minute or two. I'm very sad about it as well. I had planned to do CLW with her but it has been very much mother-led instead.
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#5 of 10 Old 05-31-2014, 12:23 AM
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Another thing you could think about doing is stopping now and then trying to start up again once your LO is born? This is something someone in my toddler group did with her girl and it was a very happy medium for them. Breast aversion is no fun, going through it myself ATM with my 2 year old so I know how you feel
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#6 of 10 Old 06-02-2014, 12:49 PM
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Be gentle with yourself and don't feel bad if tandeming doesn't work for you.

I have a 2yo who still nurses 4-5X a day and although I'm not pregnant, I at times have the heebie jeebies from him nursing along with the desire to scream "GET OFF ME!" And I have adored nursing him for the past 2 years.

Your body is gearing up to focus on a new baby so to a certain extent it's normal for your body to want to push this one "out of the nest" of nursing.

I'm hoping to get pg in the fall and I really don't want to nurse while pg although I accept that there may be some overlap. I've been doing "don't offer don't refuse" for about 6 months and it hasn't made a whole lot of difference. This kid LOVES his boobies.

My DH is a teacher and will be off school in a week so we are going to actively try to wean him this summer. I don't sit down a lot during the day because that is a nursing cue to him. I push a sippy of water or milk on him a lot so he will stay hydrated because thirst is a nursing cue also. I will let him nurse for a short time during the day and then offer a drink or snack he likes. I am making sure he has enough cuddle time with me during the day because nursing fulfills his need for physical contact. My DH is getting him after naps because he likes to nurse right when he wakes, but if daddy gets him then he gets distracted and sometimes forgets about boobies.

We currently co-sleep, but I'm working on moving him to his own mattress in his room so I'm thinking that may help with his 4am wake up for boobs.

I want to go slow and respect his needs and make sure he doesn't feel rejected. However I realize that with his personality, he would NOT be a good candidate for tandem nursing. I also am having more nursing aversion with him as of late and it's a horrible feeling.

Good luck and don't feel guilty about whatever you decide. I'm sure you're a great mom. You have to do what works for YOU.
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#7 of 10 Old 06-05-2014, 05:52 PM
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I was in a very similar situation not long ago. My 2 yr old nursed through my pregnancy even though my milk dried up around 15 weeks. I definitely had that awful feeling when he would nurse and so we cut wayyyyy back on nursing. Went from all-day, every-day to nap time and bedtime only. I would distract myself by reading while he nursed. Or at bedtime if be reading to him or singing lullabies etc.

My baby was born 3 weeks ago and I am tandem nursing them. I thought that once my milk came back and I wasn't dry nursing anymore it wouldn't feel so bad nursing the toddler. But it's strange...It actually feels WORSE! Im fine nursing the baby, but I just can't stand how I feel when my 2 1/2 nurses. Blech.

Obviously everyone has different experiences, but it might be good for you to know that it's possible that your aversion to nursing your toddler may not go away once you're not pregnant anymore! Good luck making your decision. There is no wrong answer. Do what feels best for you and your kiddo.
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#8 of 10 Old 06-06-2014, 11:21 AM
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My 2 year old weaned when I was 7 or 8 months pregnant. I couldn't believe she wasn't nursing but was actually enjoying the break between babes. When I had my baby it was like she never stopped nursing. She really helped me out through engorgement!! I am now tandem nursing my 2 1/2 year old and my soon to be 5 year old (one more month). I have not nursed a child this long before. I guess the reason I am sharing is if you end up having to take a break until you have your baby, you may very well end up tandem nursing as you expected. Good luck!

Baker's Wife and Catholic Unschooling Mama to Simeon (12), James (10), Amos (7) and Annie (5) and Jonah (3)
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#9 of 10 Old 06-06-2014, 11:47 AM
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My friend said that counting down (with her son) really helped her through that period. She would do as little as a count of 5 or 10 - telling him before he latched on. Then they would stop. She is tandem nursing now

I was hoping to tandem nurse but had the exact problem you did. My son was a little older, and he was very aware that it was hurting me and quit almost overnight. It still makes me a little sad.

Girl absolutely in love with boy and our DD (11/06), DS1 (08/11) and DS2 (brand new!)
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#10 of 10 Old 06-06-2014, 09:57 PM
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I used to have some agitation while nursing my children as they got to be about 3. I never really tandem nursed...my first mostly weaned right as I got pregnant, but when they were still nursing a lot at three, and it gave me the agitated feeling, so I would pinch and claw my arm to create a different sensation.

I know some moms who have cut their children off from dry nursing with the promise of continued nursing once milk returns. By that the milk came back, the children would be weaned and wouldn't want to continue, although I know some did.
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